


Striking Back at the Veins [An SNK/AOT AU]

by mysexualityisanime



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Shingeki no Kyojin Fusion, Badass Armin Arlert, Eremin - Freeform, F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, POV Eren Yeager, armin x eren, eren x armin - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-14
Updated: 2017-01-12
Packaged: 2018-04-09 07:22:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 40
Words: 142,454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4339208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysexualityisanime/pseuds/mysexualityisanime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the early 23rd century, reports of an elusive shadowed figure killing relentlessly is all the media is talking about. They call it the 'Shadowstrike' and he saved my life. A year and a half ago my best friend Armin Arlert was kidnapped right in front of me. I assumed he was dead until the day I saw him under a dark hood and taking out a group of thugs who were trying to capture me. I didn't want to believe it but after he revealed his face, despite his new demonic-like appearance, I knew he was the Shadowstrike.</p><p>He was part of a gene mutation experiment that changed his DNA structure to make him into what people are calling a 'monster' and he's not the only one. For some reason these people who did this to Armin are after me. Not wanting me to endure the same fate as him, Armin has been dedicating this past year to protecting me and finding out who did this to him. My safety is his highest priority and finding the person who turned Armin into a science experiment and reverse his monstrous fate is mine.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

The sound was deafening. One of the worst noises to hear at anytime of day let alone being woken up to it. The scream of agony was enhanced by the eerie sense of uneasiness I got from just glancing at my current circumstances. It took a while for my eyes to adjust to the room, it being pitch black with the exception of a candle as the only light source in what looked to be a nineteenth century style prison cell. The dirty air that enveloped me felt as if it was choking me like I was being strangled by the tortured souls who sat at the spot I was at in their final moments. When I attempted to move to the bars adjacent me, I felt a heavy weight burdened on my ankle. It was then that the memories came flooding back to me. The mission. The ambush. Armin.

He must have been the owner of that blood-curdling scream that awoke me from my trance. Those bastards. Fear, anger and determination flooded me as I once again attempted to move towards the bars, forgetting about the heavy iron shackles attached to a solid-metal ball around my bare blistered ankles. I looked down to my feet and saw that my joints were red and swollen. .

The walls like the shackles could have been built at least a hundred years ago judging by the crumbling structure of the clay-brick in it's staggered formation. This tiny room had no windows, no way of seeing the light that could be out there, no way of telling the time of day. I was cold. Shivering uncontrollably. My gear was taken and all I was left with was my tattered and torn pants along with the musky, no longer long-sleeved shirt which was clinging to my body only by thin frayed ends.

I sunk back to my original sleeping position in defeat. The small sound of water dripping from the roof echoing through the dark corridors interrupted my anguish. To my side there was a small puddle underneath the drops creating that slight rippling effect that I was hearing. As I washed my face in the refreshing water my cheek started to sting, putting my finger to my jawline I felt a gash beginning to scab over. My body was battered and bruised, but a lot of the scars had started to heal and scab over. How long had I been out for? Where was everyone? Did I really wake up to Armin's scream or was that just the trauma of previous events?

While I was laying there devising a plan for my escape, a man dressed in all black with a firearm that I couldn't exactly make out in his hands walked past. He came up to the bars I was attempting to reach before and stood there, head tilted, smirking at me. I couldn't see his eyes through his thick black visors but his facial expression told me they were looking right at my vulnerable state. How dare you mock me you bloody demon. I stood up to walk towards the man with my eyebrows furrowed attempting to look intimidating, never breaking eye contact with the man and dragging the rusty ball and chain. The weight of the shackles on my ankles made the blisters pop and scars reopen. I felt fresh blood running down to my feet but it didn't stop me.

I clenched my teeth slammed myself against the bars right in the man's face. He didn't flinch, his face still crooked in that evil sneer of his. The bars were cold against my hands. I was struggling to stay up, partly from the pain in my ankle but also from the sudden realisation at how dehydrated and starved I was.

"WHERE IS HE?!" I screamed, hearing my interrogation call back to me through the empty hallways. It was then that I heard it again, and I knew it was his, his heart-wrenching shriek crying through the darkness. My heart began to shatter. I could feel my chest constricting and I sunk to the floor on my knees. No, I couldn't appear weak with this man here over me. I slowly tilted my head up towards him, rage filling the entirety of my body.

His cry of pain didn't stop. The hairs on my back and neck were raised, I could no longer hold back the torment built up in the corners of my eye. I was supposed to protect him. There was nothing worse than the sound of the blood-curdling scream of the only person you really care for, knowing you can't do anything to make their pain go away. I would do anything to trade places with him. The waterfalls protruding out of my eyes mixed with the small pool of blood had created a little source of reflection. I looked into it and saw my piercing green eyes staring back at me. I couldn't hold back, this was too unbearable. My whole world was crumbling down ontop of me and there was no way I could lift myself up out of the rubble.

"PLEASE... STOP... IT HURTS... EREN... HELP!!" My pupils dilated, I had never been this scared since Armin was taken away from me those many years ago.

"ARMIN!!! HOLD ON!" My voice dominated over his plea's of freedom. Without even realising what I was doing I lept to my feet and gripped the cold bars between both my hands to pry them open. The man was still there, with a gun now pointed between my eyes. I stepped back, hands now cut and red with a tint of yellow from attempting the break the rusted poles. I looked straight down the barrel of the gun hoping this guy couldn't read me well enough to see that I was absolutely terrified.

"Would you shut up already..." He lowered the gun and went and sat on a stool outside my cage. His right elbow was on his knee, fingers rubbing his temples out of annoyance.

"Why are you doing this?" I quietly said, as I was too exhausted to speak in any louder tone.

No words could convey the immense amount of sorrow, vulnerability and uselessness I felt at that moment. I had to save him. I had to stop his suffering.

"ARMIN... ARMIN... ARMIN! -" I felt the connection of something metal and cold hit my right temple. My head hit the rough ground hard. My vision was fading in and out making it to register that it was the guard in front of me with the stock of his gun now covered in my blood. Armin's cries faltered and my world eventually went black.


	2. The Figure in the Trees

My eyes fluttered open. I sat up on my bed, turning my head slightly to check the time. I could of kept sleeping for another hour or so, but I didn't really want to shut my eyes and go back into that fugue state. Remembering what that nightmare was about was difficult, but I could only imagine it was horrifying. My pulse was racing, I was short for breath and my bed sheets were drenched in my own sweat.  _Great_. I dragged myself out of bed and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes whilst pulling the curtains open with my free hand. It was still pretty dark being so early in the morning, but it was light enough that I could see where I was going.

I took my sleep deprived body to the bathroom opposite my bedroom. I stopped by my bedside table to look at a picture I had sitting there of me and my best-friend Armin. Despite it being there for sometime, I never took the opportunity to admire it fully. He looked so innocent. His child-like smile and big square glasses practically created the definition of adorable. He looked immaculate compared to me with my roughed up shaggy hair going in every direction and my clothes looking like they were just salvaged from a dumpster. I had my arms around the smaller boy, both of us smiling. I could remember that day as if it were yesterday. My mother took us camping together for the weekend. We stayed up practically all night exchanging scary around-the-campfire ghost stories about paranormal beings and superhero warriors. He was always really passionate about all that mythological, sci-fi fantasy type stuff.

I sighed to myself. How long had it been since he was taken away? A year, year and a half? I had lost track of the days ages ago. Not wanting to trigger any unwanted memories from my past, I continued my slow walk to the bathroom. I turned on the fluorescent light nearly blinding myself, placed my hand on the touch screen panel at the side of the sink and set the water to a cool temperature. It was subtle yet refreshing to the touch. I glanced to the mirror above, both dripping hands on the edge of the sink to keep myself from falling asleep on the white-tiled ground below.  _Damn, I look horrible_. I gave up after about thirty seconds of trying to straighten my bird's nest of hair with my fingers and decided to take a warm shower.

As I was walking out of the bathroom drying my hair with the towel, I heard my mother call out to me from down the hallway.

"Eren honey, are you going to come eat something?" My grunt of acknowledgement conveyed its meaning and the sound of the kettle clicked. I walked back into my room and started chucking my uniform on for school. The photo of me and Armin kept grabbing my attention while I was adjusting my tie. God I missed him. I sighed again, grabbing my black leather school shoes and white socks and walked out of my room, down the hallway to the kitchen counter.

My mother knew as soon as I entered the room and sat down on the stool by the counter that something was off. She turned on the TV overhead to watch the news, all the while looking at me like I was some sick puppy - eyes drooped and a frown on her face.

"Morning, you okay, you don't seem like you slept well?" I shrugged at her observation. She copied my gesture and continued with her task in the kitchen. Walking to the kettle she started opening a sugar sachet, asking me how many I wanted in my coffee. I replied with two as I usually did, and decided to focus my attention on the news to get my mind off Armin.

It was another case study on this mysterious hooded figure media were starting to call the 'Shadowstrike'. People had been calling it a monster since it's initial appearance a few months ago when witnesses videoed the culprit cutting someone's head off with a sword. Since then it had been seen using a staff, double-blades, bow-and-arrow, dual-wield pistols and other weapons that I didn't know the name of. It was quite barbaric and ancient, the way he decided to use weapons from the two or three centuries ago. What was stranger than his choice of weaponry was when the police went to investigate the scene there were no dead bodies, no blood trails, no sign of struggle and no missing persons reported after the attack. According to this channel it was "The Mystery Of the Century". I learned that the 'Shadowstrike" was number one on Shingeki's WANTED PERSON'S list and the last sighting was at a hospital parking lot wreaking havoc.

"... witnesses claim they saw a hooded figure with purple eyes armed with a long staff and throwing knives attacking a group of people who cannot currently be identified at this time..." I removed my focus from the story as my mum came up to me, coffee and buttered toast in hand. I knew she hated this person and wanted 'it' captured but I never agreed with her. I didn't know why but I always had this idea that it was an advocate for justice, that the people he was going after were people who did wrong. Like the superheroes Armin and I would talk about. My mother was more realistic and practical in her thinking though.

"Bloody criminal. A merciless killer. I don't understand how someone could go around killing innocent people just because he doesn't get caught!"

I couldn't be bothered arguing the matter, I would of been fighting a loosing battle and honestly fighting was the last thing I wanted to be doing. I took a small sip of my coffee, then lowered it down to just below my chin to see my mum squinting at me.

"Are you sure you're okay? I heard you say Ar... umm... his name last night" My mother never liked saying his name in front of me, she knew it made me feel bad. She must have really been worried, she never pushed a subject no matter how serious.  _Did I really say his name last night?_ I moved one hand to her shoulder reassuringly.

"Really mother, I'm okay, just a bad dream" She nodded at my gesture and kissed my hand before then removing it to put a piece of toast into it. I tilted my head in a way conveying  _are you serious?_  She nodded and laughed. I rolled my eyes and took a bite of my breakfast. Crumbs went all over the kitchen counter and my pants. I placed my coffee down and brushed the crumbs off my uniform.

I had been having a lot of bad dreams lately. Sleep was considered a luxury to me. Waking up unable to breathe properly with my heart racing and having to change the sheets before I went to school had become the norm.

"You still miss him don't you?" The question took me by surprise, since when did she ask me all this stuff about Armin? I stared at her wide-eyed and I could see the pain in her eyes. I sometimes forgot that she cared about him too.

 

\---

 

Armin Arlert transferred here from Kyojin when I was about six. His father had gotten a job in genetic modification and mutations here in Shingeki and so the family had to move. Armin was an only child and his Mother and mine use to go to school together in the Kyojin so they were good friends. He would sometimes come over but he wouldn't really talk to anyone. Just stayed behind his mum while I stayed in my room playing video games. I sometimes saw Armin at my school but he still kept to himself and so I let him be. His mother was a field detective for the Shingeki Police Force. My mother and his family always worried that one day she would go out on a job one day and never return. That day unfortunately came when Armin and I were only about ten. He and his father ended up living with us but I never saw much of his father. He would always be at work, usually only coming home for the weekend, talking about how he is on the edge of a scientific breakthrough. Eventually he didn't come back at all. Armin was practically a second son to my mother as I was also an only child. He was still very shy and we didn't really talk. It wasn't until sixth grade that I noticed him reading a hefty novel in his bedroom that I decided to approach him.

Seeming annoyed at my presence, he lifted his head from the book he was reading slowly, biting his lip nervously. He returned his gaze to his book and responded with an exasperated "What do you want Jaeger."

It the first time I was ever called anything other than Eren and I didn't mind the nickname, despite his shaky tone. I sat down opposite him and simply stated that I just wanted to talk. That was when I first realized how beautiful his bright blue eyes were behind his glasses and how they complimented his blond hair colour pulled into a short ponytail so well. He seemed shocked, I wasn't sure if it was from my staring or statement. He set his book down and took his square set of eyes off placing them both on the bed.

"Eren, I get enough of this at school, I don't need any snide comments about how weak I am or how girly my hair is. Just please leave me alone." It took me a while to decipher what he had said. It was spoken in monotone, but I could still sense the hurt in his voice. Now it was my turn to be shocked. I had no idea he was bullied, I knew he didn't have many friends but to just be openly accepting of the fact that my intentions were to tease him, it hurt me. It hadn't dwelled on me that he had no other family left..

He was lonely and broken. It was hard for twelve year old me to really understand what he was going through, I never had a dad. He died fighting in Mitras before I was born. I made a promise that day, that I would never leave his side. I would always protect him no matter what the circumstances were. No one deserved to go through that much pain and not have someone to support them if they fell.

I placed a hand onto his, he flinched but didn't pull away, only looked at me again, this time in fear.

"I don't want to hurt you Armin and you're definitely not weak. I think you're pretty cool actually and I wanted to hang out with you if that's okay with you?" A smile lit up his face. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

"So what are you reading?" We had been friends ever since.

 

\---

 

My memories were broken by a vibration in my back pocket. It was a text from my friend Connie. Connie and I met in primary school. We weren't really that close until high school then he, Armin and I started doing everything together. We were introduced to his friend group and we all became fast friends.

'Hey Eren, I'm outside your house, we're walking today right?'

Crap, I forgot I was walking to school with him today. I finished off my piece of toast, kissed my mum on the cheek and exchanged farewells before I grabbed my bag from the door and left. My scrawny friend waved me over to him on the other side of the street. As I turned around to close the door of the house I felt a weird vibe and a shiver run down my back. Someone was watching me. I shrugged it off thinking it must have just been Connie but when I turned around and looked into the forest opposite my home I saw a black silhouette leaning up against the trees. It wasn't Connie, he was walking toward me with a puzzled look on his face. I glanced away from the dark figure for a second and when I looked back it was gone.  _Was I going insane? Had my mental capacity reached it's limits?_  Connie gave me a pat on the back which caused me to stumble forward. He chuckled at my clumsiness then noticed my face which mustn't have looked good as he went tense.

"You look like you've seen a ghost man, you're as pale as a sheet" Connie stepped in front of me grabbing both of my shoulders to check to see if I was okay. I removed his hands from their grasp and assured him there was nothing to worry about.

Our brisk pace towards our school began to slow down as I realised that he was trying to talk to me about something. He looked at me questioningly like he was waiting for me to answer. I didn't want to make things awkward so I pretended I heard him.

"oh... umm... yea, yea... sure..." Connie gave me another puzzled look.

"Um... I asked what we should do for Sasha's birthday, dude you okay, you seem more out of it than usual?" I brushed it off and continued to walk, ignoring his question.

"She's your girlfriend dude, you should know more than anyone else." Connie lowered his head and gripped the straps of his backpack with both hands in thought. He suddenly smiled and jumped in front of me like a ten year old girl who just found out their favourite boy band was coming to town.

"My brother runs this club in Trost, he can totally get us in." We were only sixteen and I didn't really want to be drinking underage but this could've been just the thing I needed to distract me from Armin, so I agreed. He was practically a beam of light and joy at this point. It was nice to see him like this, his round face starting to blush from the state of euphoria he was in.

This period of excitement continued as he skipped in delight and I trudged in exhaustion on our usual path through the forest. The atmosphere gave me some source of energy though and I found myself lightening my feet as I admired my surroundings. Even though I walked this track everyday before school, I could never get tired of the smell of the pine, the chirps of the swallows, the splash of the riverbank, buzz of the wind through the leaves. I always loved going through here, the outdoors always made me feel protected from the harsh cruel world that was out there to steal my happiness. I even took up survival courses when Armin was taken, believing I would run away and live in the bush and continue to search for him, but that never seemed to happen. I did learn some valuable information though. How to carve a bow and arrows out of wood, how to start a fire, to build shelter, create snares, I was all set on my quest to leave but fear held me back. Why did everything I do always relate back to Armin?

"It's Armin again isn't it." Connie said.

I appreciated the concerning tone in his voice but I was honestly sick of the constant sympathetic looks and comments so I said nothing.

"Look Eren, I don't want to seem like a douche but I think it's time you moved on. Easier said than done I understand but it's the only way you are going to be able to get on with your life. You should at least try talking to someone about it. I know you wouldn't talk to the counselors but you can talk to me or even your Mum, but you need to let it out. I can see it's tearing you apart. Honestly it's starting to make me depressed. Cheer up, there is still a chance of him being found." Although it was hard for me to believe he was still alive I understood what he was trying to say so I didn't lash out like I normally would. I had a habit of letting out my rage and frustration at myself on others. He was just trying to be a supportive friend. I hugged him for his help and encouragement. If it wasn't for him I don't think I would of been able to make it through those first few months.

 

\---

 

I always felt guilty for what I put my friends and my mother through in the immediate aftermath to the point where I would make myself sick. After the events of that night I went into a deep depression. I isolated myself from everyone and didn't talk for months. Connie always stayed with me though. One night I couldn't take the guilt anymore. Believing Armin was dead I went on top of the highest building I knew. I stood at the edge for almost two hours just looking down at my one chance at freedom. I believed that this would be the only way to end my suffering, the only way to see Armin again. The removal of my foot from the ledge was only moments away from happening when I heard my name being screamed from behind. Connie wrapped his arms around my body and slowly pulled me down. We sunk to the floor and I let out an ear-piercing wail of sorrow and bottled up agony. I didn't know how he found me and I honestly didn't care at that point of time. He let me bury myself into his chest, his head over my shoulder covered in tears.  _Eren Jaeger, don't ever try and do that again. You can get through this. We will get through this._

We cried until our body couldn't take it anymore and I fell asleep in his arms. I was so glad he saved me but it left a mental scar. After that, every time I would looked at the faded lines that were left on my wrists from the many attempts at quenching the mental pain or went on top of a tall building and reminded of the thoughts of what would come after death I would get this overwhelming wave of guilt from the devastation I put my friends and family in and end up feeling nauseous. He had cared for me and been that guardian angel I needed for so long. I never failed at appreciating what he did and what he continued to do for me.

 

\---

 

"Thanks Con, I really appreciate it." I finally said with a genuine smile of gratitude. He smiled back and put a hand on my head to rough my hair up.

"Hey!" I yelled in annoyance and attempted to neat up my mess of hair again.

I was focusing my attention on the calls of the native birds when I again felt an unwanted presence. I looked around and in amongst the hum of the trees I could swear there was that same dark figure from before only this time crouching on the branches. It saw me look at it and attempted to sprint away. Before I knew what I was doing, I was pursuing towards it. I heard Connie call out to me as I dropped my bag and ran but I ignored him. I was both intrigued and frightened at what this person wanted with me and I sure as hell wasn't about to let the answers slip away that easily.

 

\---

 

_"You can come out now, I knew you were tracking me."_

**_"What are you doing out here?."_ **

_"Why do you care?"_

_" **You're making a name for yourself, I'm concerned for your safety."**_

_"The 'Shadowstrike' is nothing more than a myth"_

**_"Footage would say differently"_ **

_"It's not like they are ever going to figure it out it's me"_

_" **Keep thinking like that and the Military Police will have your head on a plate by next week."**_

_"Keep talking like that and maybe I will have yours."_


	3. The Past Remain In The Past

The night that Armin was taken I was walking with him down a deserted street. It was late and we were coming back from one of our friend's parties. Street lights lit our path through the fogged dark haze as we walked hand in hand giggling like children at each other's stupid jokes. We weren't drunk or anything but we were being quite stupid. It was a cold night so I leant him my jacket and put my shoulder around him to keep him from shivering. We stopped at a bridge and looked over the edge to see the reflection of a beautiful night sky in the crystal-like water. The moon was in the centre of the scene with stars scattered all around it. He turned me around and pulled me in for a hug. I still had my arms around Armin's neck when we pulled away from each other's tight hold. If he wasn't my best friend I probably would of kissed him right then and there. Looking back now I wish I had.

We removed ourselves from the embrace, Armin quickly spinning on his heels when we heard the screech of tires and the smell of burning rubber filled the air. A black van was only a few feet away from us.

"Eren... run" He grabbed my arm and we started running from the five bulky men all dressed in black who emerged from the vehicle. Three of the men had caught up to us, two of the them had me by both arms and the other wrapped his arm around Armin's throat from behind. Armin dropped his weight and was able to pry the man off his neck by grabbing his own arm and dropping to one knee which sent him flying over his shoulder. After a swift downward kick to his sternum he ran towards me and attempted to help me get rid of the two men holding my arms. Sweeping kick to the left's ankle and a flying punch to the other's throat accompanied by a head butt from behind from me, loosened their grip. We started to to leave the three unconscious bodies behind us but stopped when we heard the click of a shotgun. I turned around and immediately put myself protectively in front of the blond boy. My protective instincts got the better of me though as I heard a small voice behind me.

"Please just... just do what they say..." I turned around to see a different man holding Armin except this time with a knife to his throat.

I attempted to go towards him but the other man got his shotgun around my neck hoisting me in place. I thrashed up and down attempting to break free. His hot breath vibrated against my ear.

"Unless you want your boyfriend's blood painted on these walls, I suggest you quit your struggling." I looked over at my companion who had tears of fear streaming down his face. We realized it was a snow ball's chance in hell that we were going to get us out of this. The man holding him started to comb his fingers through his hair, then abruptly grabbed it and pulled his head to one side. Armin yelped and I stared in horror as he lowered his mouth to the point on his neck where the shoulder connects. He laughed as moved the knife slowly away from his neck and moved his kissing up to his ear and back down again.

"Yes, this one will do nicely." He chuckled sliding the knife across Armin's cheek.

Armin shrieked and started tearing at the man's face trying to pull him off but he was too strong. I saw red. I could feel tears starting to swell up in my eyes as his hands started to travel down his body and underneath the jacket that I gave to him. I screamed for him to stop as he started to rip Armin's shirt off.

"Eren... please... just don't look..." I could see he was in pain, mentally and physically. What sort of a friend was I to let this happen to him. Armin's captor pressed him up against the wall of the bridge. He put his knife in his teeth and ripped his shirt off completely chucking it and the jacket into the cold dark water. My friend was shivering from the cold of the night and from the realisation of what they were going to do to him. He bit his lip to try and muffle the cry and turned towards my petrified face. I saw him mouth the words  _it's okay_  but I knew he didn't believe it. I couldn't bare to watch this.

"STOP!" I yelled at the top of my lungs while desperately trying to remove myself from the armed man's grasp. The feeling of terror now flooded Armin's bright blue eyes. A flash of blue and red passed through the thick mist that surrounded us, we all stared down the street as we heard the soft sound of police sirens in the distance.  _We're saved_  I thought, but I was so wrong. The man holding me kicked me in the knees. I cried out in pain as the caps clicked out of place. The excruciating sting passed through the nerves of my legs restricting them from use. He yelled at me to get up but no matter how much I tried to oblige my body couldn't take it.

"Fuck this." He took me by the collar and started tugging me towards the van, I pleaded for them to stop but to no avail. The man started to take Armin as well but dropped him after he kicked them in the shin releasing their grip on him so he could get away. He desperately scrambled to get to his feet but was pursued and quickly picked back up.

"Let him go, he's too much trouble, this one will be fine, I'm sure his body will withstand it." The man stroked my face as he taunted, I tried to bite my way out of the situation, only to piss him off more as he told his comrade to throw Armin away. I heard his breathing hitch with a loud thud as he hit his head on the side of the wall and collapse to the ground. I looked over to him bleeding from his head, his eyes suffocated in his own tears staring into mine which were suffocated in fury.

"WAIT! Take me instead, I promise I won't be any trouble just let Eren go!" There was so much desperation and pleading in Armin's voice as he implored the words. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. The two men looked at each other and smiled.

"You're brave kid, but a desperate fool."

"NOOO ARMIN DON'T DO THIS" I screamed. Armin looked at me with his tear and blood-stained face and smiled slightly.

"Please Eren... go... I will be okay... " He sobbed through short breaths. The man with the rifle grabbed me by the collar of my shirt and lifted me off the ground. I heard Armin scream my name as the man began to walk me to the side of the bridge.

"I said I would go with you, please just let him go!"

"We can't have any bystanders now can we." The man holding me disclosed as he was holding me over the abyss which I was sure would be final resting place. The last thing I heard was Armin screaming for them to let me go, which they did, over the bridge. That was the last time I saw Armin.

I woke up in a hospital bed to be told I was found unconscious on the side of a river bank with permanent damage to my knees. The kidnappers got away but they were doing what they could to find them. That was in December a year and a half ago, it was now July and no new information had been given on Armin's whereabouts or the people who took him. I went to the police station everyday for weeks, every week for months pleading that they send a search party or something but they never did.

 

\---

 

I could still hear Connie calling my name in the distance but I didn't dare lose sight of this shadow. The shrubs and bush land were scraping along my hands and I could feel my arms and legs beginning to bite my skin from the constant cutting. I stopped at an open clearing looking around to see which direction it head. I had lost sight of it. _Damn it_. I took one more glance around before turning around back to Connie.

I walked back to a bewildered look and raised arms in the air out of frustration.

"Eren, you're going insane, you can't just go chasing bunnies down the rabbit hole, you die!"

"I... thought I saw something."

"Well yeah no shit bro, what was it?" I didn't answer straight away as I didn't really know what to say.  _Yea, I thought I saw a shadow staring into my soul so I thought I would follow it._  People already thought I was mad I didn't need to add fuel to the fire.

"You know what I'm not even going to bother, the only thing I care about right now is giving Sasha the best damn seventeenth she will ever get." His eyes were gleaming with admiration of his girlfriend. He was quite the pathetic love fool.

 

\---

 

I could see my group of friends huddled by the nine-foot gate to our school. As I was making my way through the busy crowd of students I almost got toppled over by a raven-haired girl wrapping her arms around my neck hugging me. I saw the red scarf in the corner of my eye and immediately knew it was Mikasa.

"You know, one day the teachers are going to take that scarf off you," I said in between laughter at the sudden intimacy. She put her arms back by her side and shook her head, eyes practically rolling to the back of her skull.

"I'm the teacher's pet, I could come to school wearing a bikini and they wouldn't give me a second glance." This earned a laugh from both of us. She linked arms with me and dragged me towards my group of friends. I was already starting to feel better.

The marooned hair girl I recognised as Sasha had already wrapped his arms around Connie's shoulders from behind with Franz, Hannah and Bertolt standing beside them. We were the group of misfits, and our variety very clearly showed that. Bertolt was nearly twice as tall and bulky as little red-haired Hannah who was practically leaning on her 'secret crush' Franz who besides me was the only one who had any sort of colour to their skin. Everyone knew Franz and Hannah had a thing for each other, they would just never admit it.

"Time and place babe." I heard Sasha say behind Connie's ear as I walked up to the group. Connie laughed nervously and said we would all meet at 'Club Maria' at about seven tonight.

"Happy Birthday Potato Girl." I said to Sasha with a smile on my face.

"Thanks Jaeger." That had been her nickname for as long as I could remember. It's not that she was big, she just had this abnormal love for potatoes. Most of us gave each other weird nicknames that only us eight would call each other. Connie was 'baldy' because he had always had a shaved hair-cut. Bert was 'The Colossal' relating to his humongous size. Mikasa was 'mum', though she didn't like to be called it, it suited her well. Sasha's 'Potato Girl' then I was Jaeger. When Armin was here we would always call him 'Blondie', a name I decided for him. He didn't mind, he liked the name and he chose Jaeger for mine. Hannah and Franz didn't like the whole nickname thing but Armin was liked the idea of 'Thing One & Thing Two' from his favourite book as a kid. My friend group was kind of crazy and outgoing but we never grew tired of eachother and I loved them nonetheless.

Mikasa punched both of us in the arm telling us to knock it off. I cringed as the strike hit one of the cuts that I had made through my pursuit in the forest. Hannah must have been the only one to notice that the cringe plus my rugged appearance of my tie loosened, various twigs and shrubbery through my hair, and dirt covering my face and shirt, must have meant something happened. She came running up to me tenderly looking at my wounds.

"Oh my gosh what happened to you!" I waved it off saying that I took the wrong path in the forest. Hannah looked over to Connie for assurance, in which he nodded. Mikasa came in front of me and stared at me coldly.

"I told you you shouldn't go through there, you're going to get in so much crap for the way you uniform looks." I loved how Mikasa was always making sure people were following the rules when she can't even wear the right uniform to school, she was always defending us like the Mum she was. Mikasa did taekwon-do with me. I was lucky I took up martial arts. That's where I first saw Armin.

We both started taekwon-do at about the same time. We were both quite good, my specialty being more special technique with high kicks and sparring, his being self-defence, theory and patterns. When we became friends we helped each other get to black belt and when grading came we both cheered each other on. It was one of the happiest moments I remember when we were both given our 1st degree black belts. I wasn't really friends with Mikasa at the time but I definitely knew her from her talent. From there, the three of us went to all sorts of competitions, even world titles. Though I didn't win a placement, Armin won a silver medal for his self-defence routine which I couldn't lie was pretty bad ass. No one ever bullied him again after that gossip went throughout the school. Mikasa graded at the same time as me and Armin and was talented in all fields, especially the fighting apparatus' including weapons. She came home from the world titles having won gold in all her divisions.

"Don't worry about it Mikasa I will be fine, shouldn't you be more worried about how we are all going to a club? Drinking?" I knew this would tick her off. We all started to laugh at her as she began to rant about alcohol poisoning and the consequences of underage drinking. I tuned out halfway through her speech though. I couldn't get over that shadowy figure I kept seeing.  _Was I losing my mind?_  No, I had to stop thinking like that. For the sake of my friends, I was going to take this opportunity to forget about all those stupid problems I kept having and have some fun. Connie was right, it was time I moved on.

 

\---

 

I walked into the cafeteria with only a bottle of water in hand. Despite Mikasa's plea for me to eat something, I really wasn't hungry. I sat down at our usual lunch spot in between Mikasa and Connie who had his arm's around the birthday girl. I tuned out at whatever conversation was happening between my friends, absent-mindedly chewing on the lid of my bottle. Mikasa nudged me a little to make sure I was okay. I nodded, screwing the cap of the bottle to take a sip.

"So what do you guys think about the 'Shadowstrike'?" I choked on my water at Hannah's question. Connie started to pat me on the back as I hunched over in a painful coughing fit. The cafeteria went oddly silent as people turned to look at me in my state of stupidity. I stopped coughing after about a minute or so, gasping for air I urged Hannah to go on. Hannah gave me a strange look but continued.

"I was just wondering what you guys thought about this mysterious vigilante? I personally think he's awesome, I wish I had the bravery to do what he does." Franz looked at her in astonishment.

"You serious, the guy's a criminal, he's no better than the murderer's he killed"

"You two seem to be assuming that this 'thing' is a man. It could very well be a woman." Mikasa added, her feminist views never ceasing to exist in our conversations. Sasha gasped and slammed excitedly onto the table.

"What if it's a sasquatch?"

"He's too skinny to be a sasquatch"

"SHE..."

This bantering went on for ages, but a question kept repeating in my mind blocking my ability to take it in. Could that silhouette in the trees have been the 'Shadowstrike'? If so, why was it watching me? Was I it's next victim? Was Connie? Could it be watching us now? Was it plotting something against me? My breathing began to come in short bursts and I was finding hard to focus my eyes on something and take oxygen in. This had happened before numerous times and I knew I was about to have a panic attack. I tapped Connie on the shoulder who took one look at me and realised what was happening.

 

\---

 

"Eren look at me, keep your eyes on me, okay you're going to be fine, just breathe..." I must have blacked out somewhere during the attack because the last thing I remembered was being dragged through the cafeteria and I was sitting at the floor of the men's toilets by the time I came to. Connie let out a breath and made a short chuckle patting my thigh.

"Well dude, you gave me a good scare that time. Probably one of your worse ones, want to talk about it?" I shook my head. He stood up from his crouched position and reached out one of his hands to pull me up. I took it reluctantly, claiming that I was fine and didn't need help to get up. The bell was about to go so we decided to go to the lockers to get ready. As I was getting my gear for PE, Connie continued the conversation our friends were having before, asking about what I thought about the 'Shadowstrike'. He didn't register that it may have been the reason for my attack and I sure as hell didn't want to have another one so ignored my inner thoughts and carried on.

"I don't really have an opinion on it, yea it's cool what he does but lives are still being lost, well at least that's what the media is telling us, they never find the bodies." The clash of the locker door startled me as I closed it with more force than I intended. Connie leant on his in thought.

"Yea that is a bit weird. you know what's weirder though..." He waited for my full attention before continuing.

"...all of the Shadowstrike's victims have played some sort of vital part in the study of biochemistry." I raised my eyebrows at his sudden insight into this person. How on earth could he know that?

"I've been doing some research..."

"Woah hold up." I interrupted. "You? Research?" Connie had never really been a bright person so the fact that he actually took time out of his life to study into the facts of this thing was quite surprising to me.

"Yea, yea, don't tell anyone. Anyway I did some research and apparently all the attacks he has done, link to either a Hospital or University or Science Lab that has made some sort of contribution to biochemistry and in each case the place has been trashed and have had notes and papers missing ever since the attack." If what Connie was saying was true then I agreed, this was very odd.

"You think he's trying to find something?" I asked

"Don't know but it must be important if he is willing to kill to get it"

"Well somebody's in love with the 'Shadowstrike'." I sassed nudging Connie in the elbow. The bell rang and hordes of student's started to flood the corridors. Connie and I said our goodbyes and left to go to our classes.

 

\---

 

**_"Why are you following him?"_ **

_"You don't think after that stunt I pulled at the university that they won't go after him?"_

**_"I think that if you keep following him they are going to find him faster."_ **

_"Then let them come, better I put an end to them sooner rather than later."_

_" **What if he finds out? Who you are I mean?"**_

_"He won't find out."_

**_"And if he does?"_ **

_"... he won't."_


	4. What Really Defines a Human?

I heard the horn of Connie's car and the cat calls from my companions. I told my mum I would be back late and opened the door to leave to go to Sasha's 'Birthday Bash' as Connie called it at his brother's club. My mother nodded and told me to be safe as I walked out the door. I got into the back seat of the car next to Mikasa and Bertolt, Sasha in the passenger seat and Connie driving.

When we arrived at the 'Maria' I noticed Hannah and Franz weren't there. I asked Connie where they were, the birthday girl dragging him down with her weight as she clung to him.

"Apparently they had to 'study' together so they couldn't make it."  
"They are totally hooking up" Sasha replied next to him

"You sure we will be allowed in man?" Bert asked while making his way out of the vehicle Mikasa and I closely behind him.

"Yea don't fret Colossal, he's my brother, of course he will and Mum can take out the guard if we need a Plan B" Mikasa winked and started running up to the entrance. She noticed I was still standing just outside the car staring at the neon sign. I had never been to a club before or even drunk alcohol so I was a bit hesitant. Mikasa came back down, took my hand and started tugging me lightly towards the beating entrance.

Before I even walked into the club I could feel the thumps of the music reverberating through the floor. When Mikasa opened the door the music hit me like a wave. I couldn't even decipher the song it was so loud. Mikasa dragged me through the crowd following the other's to a bar. The stench of vomit and sweat wafted through the air stifling my ability to use my senses. This made me feel very uncomfortable, I hated not being in control of my body, not being able to tell where I was it made me anxious and protective. Mikasa sat me on a stool and said she was going to go dance. I nodded at her leave and she disappeared into the crowd. I couldn't see Bert anywhere either so I just sat there awkwardly. I heard an odd slurping type noise next to me. Sasha and Connie were passionately making out unaware of the people around them. I scratched the side of my head and made a slight coughing noise. Sasha pulled away and smirked at me.

"I'm going to the bathroom, get me a drink will ya babe?" Sasha asked giving him a quick peck on the lips and slap on his backside, then made her way to the restrooms. Connie turned around to the bartender with an idiotic smile on his face.

"Two schooner's of new thanks and, Eren?"

"Oh ah, just water"

Connie came closer to me and gave me the same smirk as Sasha did earlier. They were so alike when it came to their crazy, no-shame personality. The bartender shortly came back with two beers and my water. After popping off the cap, he took hold of his beer and held it to his lips.

"You know you are allowed to have fun..." He took a long sip of his beverage before continuing. "This IS supposed to be a 'birthday bash' after all." Connie bending two fingers to emphasise the birthday part. I took my water in both hands and held it in my lap.

"I know but I have never done anything like this before and I want to take it slow you know." Connie snickered at my comment.

"You sound like you're referring to a relationship." He held his hands up in a surrender posture.

"It's your loss man." He took another swig of his beer smiling as his girlfriend came back dragging him and his beer to the dance floor with a playful yet seductive look on her face. She started nibbling on Connie's ear as she took her beer from him. If he was dog, his tail would be wagging away.

"Oh ha... umm... see ya Eren... don't have too much fun without me." I couldn't help but be jealous of Sasha. It's not that I had a crush or anything but I had always wanted someone to look at me in the way they look at each other. I looked down at myself in the water and started swirling the straw around. As I looked closer into it I could of sworn I saw a black spot up the top that Contrasted with the bright neon lights flying around the room. The source made me drop my drink. The shadowed figure was just outside the bar. I began pushing my way through the sweating heaving mass of people. No way was I letting him get away this time. I managed to pull my body out from the crowd out the door and I saw the figure head into a dark alley a few buildings down the street. Everything inside me told me that this was a bad idea and that I should turn back but I ran straight towards the source of my curiosity anyway.

 

\---

 

I stopped at the entrance to the alleyway. It was a dead end, no sign of anyone being there. That feeling of someone watching me was still floating at the pit of my stomach. I thought maybe if I kept still I would be able to hear where he was. Instead I heard the sound of heavy footsteps. Not wanting any confrontation I went to head back to the club but was stopped by a tall guy dressed in all black, two others wearing the same with a hood covering their faces following closely behind him.  _So much for no confrontation._  Although they were also in dark attire, I didn't recognise them to be that same dark figure from the forest. The man in the front without a hood was quite large and muscular with a blonde buzzcut, the others similar in size but with hoods. If it was just one I may have been able to get out of there unharmed but three against one was not ideal. To say they were intimidating was an understatement. Going back to listening to my instincts, I stood my ground and raised my hands above my head.

"Look guys I don't want any trouble" I said with as much confidence as I could muster through my shaky breaths. Why was this happening again?

"We know you don't, but he does." The leader pointed past my head, I turned my body around to see the shadowed figure that I had thought I lost standing before me. He had violet aura about him that I couldn't explain but at the same time, I could see that he was in fact human. He pulled a long stick, which I recognised as a bo staff from behind him. He started to walk towards me in long graceful steps as if he was weightless.

"I suggest you step to the side, this could get messy." I quickly drew back to the wall next to me.

"We are here for the boy, it would be wiser for YOU to step to the side, unless you want your blood to stain these walls." The man in the middle taunted.

"I think it would be easier Reiner, if I just took what sorry excuse you have for a life away."

"I dare you to try."

I felt my legs go numb. No, this couldn't happen again. I thought after that night that I would never have to endure that fear ever again. What really confused me though was that this man in the hood was trying to protect me. Why? Why did they want me and why did he not want them to take me?

The hooded man took his bo in both hands and charged in for the attack. That voice, where had I heard it before? It definitely belonged to someone I knew but judging by the light tone he possessed, he couldn't be older than twenty. There was no doubt that this man protecting me was the Shadowstrike.

The thug in the middle who the Shadow called Reiner, took a step back and gestured with one arm out in front to his two companions to take action against the Shadow. They started to run towards the hooded man in purple but did not take more than a few steps before the Shadow's bo circled around his own head striking down towards their ankles, knocking their legs out from under them with little to no effort. He watched the thugs hit the ground with a thud and grunt in pain at their fall. One of them took a knife from out of his boot, stumbling up to charge. He jumped, aiming the knife straight for his collarbone but was inevitably stopped by the man as he turned his back to his pursuer and delivered a swift back kick to the attacker's stomach. He went flying across the alleyway and hit the back of his head on the wall. I stood in terror as I saw the blood trickle down his neck leaving a small puddle beneath his limp body.

"Now would be the time to run..." He sniggered, stating the obvious. I assumed he was motioning to me but was conflicted as to whether I should help this person fight these thugs or listen to him and run. My mind was made up when I felt a hand pull at my shin. The other thug that hit the ground had crawled over to me while I was distracted by the Shadow's performance. His tug made me off balance and I tumbled backwards instinctively break falling with my hands slamming the cement ground hard. He climbed on top of me pulling a knife out and aimed for my throat. I grabbed his arm before he could penetrate the skin and twisted my hips so that he rolled off me. The mix of fear and adrenalin gave me a new found strength as I rolled back to a standing position.

Deciding retreat would be the best possible option I didn't hesitate to sprint away from the scene. A strange wind stopped me from moving so I only made a couple of steps until the force pushed me on my back again. It felt as if gravity was increasing on me as this gust of air continued to push me down to the ground. The man with the knife found me again and went to slash at my stomach but was only able to deliver a small cut to my face before he was flung across the whole expanse of the alleyway by a long staff.

The Shadowstrike stood over me with a hand held out in front of my face. The strong wind made my vision blur but I could make out two large violet orbs coming from under the dark hood. He saw I was not getting up and hoisted me up with both his arms, laying my motionless body horizontally across his back. He ran to the spot where I was before against the building and sat me down quickly before using the staff as a pole vault and kicked Reiner square in the jaw. Reiner stumbled but was able to retaliate by taking his staff from his hands, tackling him to the ground by his neck with it. He was twice as big as the Shadow and easily held him down.

"You're existence and morals disgust me!" I heard the Shadow yell from the ground where Reiner pinned him. The Shadow threw a palm strike right for the larger man's chin which sent him upwards into the air. The Shadow rolled back and jumped nearly five feet in the air. They were suspended there as the man with the violet aura attacked with a foot straight to his temple.

They were achieving the impossible law defying acrobatics up in the air, evading punches, kicks and weapon attacks with lightning sharp reflexes, I swore they would be able to dodge a bullet if ever put in the situation. The Shadow received an elbow delivered straight to his face followed by an uppercut to his jaw which sent him flying back, only a few feet away from where I was still dazed in awe. Instinctively I crawled towards him to make sure he wasn't unconscious. There was blood dripping from his face but other than that he didn't seem phased.  _Are these guys really human?_

I was in hand's reach of the Shadowstrike as he armed himself with what looked like two silver-blue crescent blades from his belt, one in each hand. He side glanced to my frightened body and I could make out half of the man's face along with the familiar strands of blond going over his it. It was only for a second but in that short moment I saw determination flooded across his violet eyes. They were so mesmerising and unique, I couldn't take my eyes off him.

"Please Eren... go!" He implored. A mixture of confusion and astonishment filled my body. I could feel my heart drop to my stomach. I was anchored to the spot from fear and bewilderment. My mind travelled back to that night when he was taken away from me.

_"Please Eren... go... I will be okay..."_

No, it couldn't be true. He's dead. But I couldn't help but hope. Could that have been Armin standing right in front of me?

"I SAID GO!" The Shadow pushed me out of my amazement and I didn't hesitate any longer to run away from the scene. I looked back to see the thug Reiner have a blade go up from his sternum to his head, practically cut in half lying on the floor lifeless. The Shadow was turned but his hood had come off and there was that beautiful shoulder length blond hair waving in the air. The man I believed was Armin stood there for only a second before wall jumping his way up to the roof of the buildings and disappeared. If that really was Armin, how on earth could he do things like that? How could he kill all those people? It mustn't have been him. Those skills cannot be done. Wall running? Flying acrobatic kicks through the air? It is not humanly possible, it couldn't be human.

 

\---

 

Maybe I was just delusional. But maybe I wasn't. If that really was him, then that meant he was alive, my best friend was alive. I stopped my frantic running and headed for the nearest bin I could find. The contents of what little I had eaten that day came pouring out of me. My head started spinning and I dropped to the ground realising I was back at the club. My mind once again darted from thought to thought of all the evidence pointing towards Armin being that monster. I heard a female calling my name through the thumping of the club's music and the chatter amongst the streets. It was Mikasa running up to me, worry written all over her face.

"Where the hell have you been! Everyone is worried sick, oh, oh my gosh are you okay." She descended to my level and picked my weak body up so that I was now standing, placing all of my weight on her shoulder. She dragged me to the entrance of the club and sat me down on the steps outside it. I could still feel the vibrations of the music on the steps which only made me feel even more nauseous. She waited for me to get my breath back as I was still quite fatigued by the events before. The feeling of that strange wind out of nowhere still lagged on my nerves and I felt myself swaying.

"Are you going to tell me what happened?" She put an encouraging hand on my thigh while waiting for me to answer which stabled me a little from the. What was I supposed to say? I got attacked by a group of thugs? I saw the 'Shadowstrike'?

"I saw Armin." I decided to go with murmuring in a tiny voice.

"Come again?" I didn't know if it was that she didn't hear me over the noise of the crowds around us or if it was that she was shocked from what I said.

"I was attacked... and Armin saved me" I restated in a clearer voice than before. She looked at me with those penetrating grey eyes of hers filled with dismay. I could tell she didn't believe me as she removed her hand from my thigh and wrapped it around my shoulders, leaning her head against mine.

"I understand that you miss him Eren, but you have to accept that he's gone." I slowly stood up from her hold, turning around to look at her now scared expression. I didn't realise that my face was probably flushed with anger at her demeaning comment.

"I know what I saw. I'm not making this up." I declared menacingly. She stood up and began to laugh.

"God how much did you drink tonight?" I grabbed her by the collar of her shirt and pulled her towards me.

"Eren... let go..." She begged clawing at my hand.

"I'M NOT DRUNK. I KNOW WHAT I SAW. ARMIN IS ALIVE!" My anger and frustration fell out of my mouth in a fit of rage right in her face. Her pupils dilated and before I knew what was happening she had me in a wrist lock. My body was bent over awkwardly every movement I made making the pain increase. I demanded her to let me go.

"Not until you calm down." She fumed. I stopped struggling and began to breath at a steadier pace. She let me go and gently buried me in a hug. I immediately felt guilty for taking out my anger on her. I continued to apologise for my behaviour, as she rubbed my back and told me that it was okay. I couldn't blame her for not believing me. She wasn't there. She hadn't witnessed the dread that I saw.

Mikasa called a taxi to take me home. I didn't really want to go back into that heaving mass of lust and hormones. I hopped into the car after thanking Mikasa and apologising once more for my outburst before. She gently pushed me into the vehicle as I told the driver my address and buckled in. My usual state of thought entered into my mind,

As much as I wanted to believe that Armin was alive, I felt uneasy at the thought that he was the Shadowstrike. The evidence of the same voice, same hair and the fact that he knew my name suggested that he was but from what I saw, the Shadow's eyes were an unnatural, almost animal-like purple, Armin's were an iconic blue and he couldn't possibly be able to do those physics defying martial art moves that I saw. I really wanted him to be alive, but I didn't want him to be a criminal or worse, a psychopathic, murdering, postal monster.

 

\---

 

**_"Are you insane! Rivaille is going to have your neck when you get back to HQ"_ **

_"What was I supposed to do just let him get taken, the guy was on my deadpool anyway"_

**_"It doesn't matter, you risked getting caught today. He can't possibly be worth it and I had the serum so you can't have possibly done it properly?"_ **

_"Don't worry about it. What's the problem with him finding out anyway"_

**_"The less people that know you're alive the better."_ **

_"I'm fairly certain- "_

**_"There's a price on your head, the 'Shadowstrike's getting around... "_ **

_"Don't call me that!"_

**_"The Garrison Regiment will eventually connect the dots"_ **

_"I don't care, I'm not letting those sick bastards take Eren."_

**_"What's so important about him anyway? Why do they want him?"_ **

_"That's what I want to know."_


	5. A Ghost Conjured From Hell

"DON'T KILL EACH OTHER!" Mikasa yelled from the sidelines over the sticky taped-up ropes surrounding the fighting arena.

"Awww Mikasa that's no fun, it's only a few weeks till world's and we need to practice." Armin whined over me in his choking hold. I chuckled and tapped him on the arm signalling that he won the round as he released his grasp.

"I don't think you need to worry that much dude, you're better at self-defense than anyone in the team." I acknowledged giving Armin a cheeky smile. Armin laughed shyly blushing so hard that his face became as red as a tomato.

"Eren's right Armin, you could give me a run for my money." Mikasa genuinely said passing Armin and I towels and water bottles.

"Thanks guys I really appreciate it." I vaulted over the ring and held the ropes open for Armin to get out. We jumped off the elevated platform and made our way to the showers to wash ourselves off. Being best friends and living with each other meant that seeing each other shirtless in just our underwear was a comfortable habit but I still couldn't get over how nice and toned Armin's body was and butterflies ended up filling me from head to toe every time I looked.

Armin trained for hours everyday, more so with world's coming up. He was very committed to his martial arts, sometimes he wouldn't sleep, spending his time researching into his opponent's weaknesses and strengths. The light glistening off his body made him nothing short of a model in my eyes. I lifted my shirt off and jumped into the shower next to him. We turned on the water simultaneously from the panels beside us and let the warm refreshing water cleanse us. I looked over at Armin who had his eyes closed with a slight grin on his face as he took out his ponytail and let the water run down his neck and body soaking his hair down to his shoulders.  _He was so beautiful when he was at peace._

"What?" I asked.

"Hm? Oh nothing just enjoying the water." I nodded and closed my eyes to do the same. My sense of hearing was enlightened with the splash of the water on the tiled ground and the sudden footsteps coming towards me. I opened my eyes and looked to my side to see Armin tenderly looking at spot on my chest.

"Did I do that?" I looked down at my chest where we was pointing and found a purplish-black mark where Armin had kicked while we were sparring.

"Don't worry about it, it doesn't hurt or anything." He traced his finger on it gently causing me to slightly wince in pain. I bit my lip trying to muffle the hiss as I didn't want the concerned boy to worry. He looked up towards my face biting his own lip and carefully hugged me making sure that he was not touching the area of pain.

"Hey, I said don't worry about it, really. It's part of the art, we all get hurt at some point." I tried to assure him. I stroked his hair to try and make him feel better. His breath spilled into my shoulder and then lowered towards my chest. He pressed his lips against the mark. It was slow yet soft and gentle making my whole body tingle with warmth. My heart started to race.

He lifted himself so that he our faces were under the same stream from the shower head.

"It doesn't mean I want to see you get hurt. I'm getting an ice-pack for you." He ran his hands over the panel to turn his water off and made his way out of the shower room leaving me standing there under the water breath-taken.

 

\---

 

The last thing I wanted when I walked through the door was to be bombarded with questions. My mentally unstable and drowsy condition could not cope with it at that moment. But my mother was insistent on asking why I came home so early. It wasn't that early, only about twelve so I didn't understand what she was going on about. Though I loved how kind and caring she was, I just wanted to collapse and forget the night had ever happened. I pulled out of her tight grasp when she noticed a scar running down my lip. She squished my cheeks together to get a closer look which made the cut sting and start bleeding the bad memories again. I pried at her hands to let go.

"Eren, you're not getting into fights again are you?"

"No mother, I'm fine." I exasperated. It mustn't have been convincing. She transferred her arms to her chest and crossed them, giving me a look that said  _I know you're lying._

"Really, I just... tripped on a curve and hit my head, I'm serious. It's fine." She still wasn't convinced but she didn't persist.

"As long as you're okay, but I still don't understand why you wouldn't be out later, I didn't set a curfew or anything."

"So?" I asked

"It's just that... You're at that age where... you will... damn it, your dad was supposed to give you this talk."  _Oh god no not this talk!_

"Mother no it's fine... I'm not going to- it's- no-" It was getting too awkward to handle so I said nothing more and took sanctuary in the safety of my bedroom. My mother didn't seem to get the message as she followed me to my safe haven and sat on my bed continuing the conversation.

"You just need to make sure you're being safe is all I'm saying sweetie."

"I thought I already told you. I'm gay and don't worry I'm a virgin."

"YOU CAN STILL GET STD'S!" I buried my head in my hands.  _This was going nowhere_. I stood up, took my mother by the hands and dragged her out of my room. I kissed her goodnight and closed the door of my room. The faint 'love you' echoed from outside my room. My boots slipped off and my bed creaked when I climbed on top of it staring at the ceiling.

The ceiling was blank and monotoned yet it held all the colourful memories of me and Armin as kids. There was yellows and greens of when we would laugh until our stomachs cramped but there were also reds and greys from the traumas he- well, we faced. In the first few weeks of his mother's death when we became friends he wasn't able to sleep so he would come into my room and we would stare at the ceiling talking about nothing. I would stay awake with him until my voice calmed him to the point of unconsciousness. Occasionally he would toss and turn from nightmares of his mother which he told me about when he awoke. I would pull him to my chest to shush his painful sobbing while stroking his hair until his bad thoughts left. It killed me knowing he was mentally wounded, I just wanted to rip out the bad thoughts from his memories and burn them in the deepest parts of hell where they belonged, not buried in that faultless loving boys mind.

I felt a tear slide past my eye. How could he of all people be the Shadowstrike. He was so kind. So innocent. Yes, he was brilliant at self-defence but that's all he would use it for, self-defence. He hated hurting people. When we would compete he would always go up to his competitor afterwards to make sure they were okay and he didn't injure them. Mikasa was right I must have been delusional. Someone slipped something in my drink maybe and I was just seeing things. I kept to trying to make-up excuses proving I was misinterpreting the situation but I could not deny that that voice and that hair was definitely his,

 _I suggest you step to the side, this could get messy._ Those were not the words of the sensitive, caring friend I knew. They were the words of psychopathic killer who took joy in the suffering of others. If he was really alive all this time why couldn't he come back? Didn't he realise that I thought he was dead? Why would he put me through this much grief to just bestow it on others? He was definitely always intelligent enough to keep his identity hidden but why? These questions repeated in my head until they lost their meaning and they pulled me into a forced and restless sleep.

 

\---

 

The sound of the slide and shift of my window opening startled me to consciousness. I sat up to the click of it closing to see a familiar blue-eyed boy, moonlight refracting off his shining blond hair. Armin! I jumped out of bed to see the face I had been longing to see for so long but he wouldn't turn to me. Quiet sobs emitted around me, coming from the smaller boy. His glassy eyes stared up at mine and pulled me in for a hug.

"I'm so sorry I left Eren." He sobbed into my chest.

I put my hands around him, shutting my tired eyes and burying myself into his shoulder.

"No no Armin, it was my fault, I should've protected you." I announced still holding him in my trembling arms. He removed himself from my hold and wrapped his arms around my neck. I opened my eyes to see his right in front of mine, no longer with a hint of sadness but with a sense of lust. His breath tickled my mouth as his tear-soaked lips were only centimetres away from mine. He slowly closed his eyes and moved closer, past my lips and to my ear.

"You're right." He whispered almost inaudibly. He backed away with his head tilted towards the ground. The sobbing had stopped, replaced with rapid breaths followed by a high-pitched devilish laugh.

"Armin?" I questioned. His normal casual clothing had changed to a full black attire and his eyes, a beautiful blue only seconds before were a dark yet vibrant purple. His eyebrows were furrowed, he had a crooked smile and violet streaks ran through his fringe making him look infernal.

"You should've protected me Eren." He grunted with a laugh. He pulled out the same two blue-tinted blades he killed that thug Reiner with. It still held his dried up blood on them. I retreated backwards, falling on to my bed frantically scurrying on my hands and feet in fear. He jumped on top of me with both knees on either side of my body to pin me down straddling me on the bed. If he looked as he did when he came through the window I would have pictured this scene as sexual intimacy but right now, it was anything but. He had one blade to my neck and the other behind him. The scent of the remains of his past kills on the blade made me wonder what his next victim would pick up when he finished disposing of me.

I tried to scramble free but every time I moved he would drive his blade deeper into my throat.

"See what you've done to me, it's because of you that I'm this way... Now you have to pay." He raised both blades above his head ready to end my life.

"Armin... NO!."

 

\---

 

I jolted awake, desperately catching on to whatever bit of air I could muster, with the all too familiar feeling of sweat pouring down my face and soaking my bed-sheets. Heavy footsteps ran down the hallway followed by my mother who looked as if she had just woken up slamming my door open. She ran over to me, her hair in a tangle of knots from last nights sleep. She felt my pulse and gasped.

"I heard you scream, what happened?" I wanted to answer but I couldn't. Partly because my mind couldn't fathom words from lack of breath and the burden it would bring if I told her. I didn't want her to worry and unlike the other times I had nightmares, I actually remembered what happened in that one. If that was what all my nightmares were like, I was glad I didn't recall them.

"It... it was just a dream... it's okay... I'm fine now." I babbled. She gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before she headed back to her bedroom to catch up on some much needed sleep. I attempted to lift myself off my bed but immediately collapsed to the ground with a splitting pain on the side of my head and a cramp running through the backs of my legs to my lower back.  _That was some nightmare_  I pondered as I made a second attempt at removing myself from that hell-binding mind prison I called a bed.

I was glad that it was a dream though. The thought of Armin being that demonic creature made me sick to my stomach. No doubt the fact that he saved me and took out that thug with one swift strike was pretty amazing, but it's better that those events remain just that. A nightmare. I finally managed to pull myself up and make my way to the bathroom. I turned on the light and trembled at the sight that was staring back at me. My face was blotched with dirt, cuts and bruises. Eyes bloodshot and hair sticky with old and new sweat. There was a cut running vertically across the side of my lip, I could still taste the metallic liquid from it.  _No, but it was a dream_. I looked down to my leg which gave me proof of last night's events which should of have just been in my head. A purple hand mark where that thug crawled and grabbed me.  _It was real_. But where did it end. Was it all real or were some of the events just a dream. I couldn't tell no matter how hard I tried.

I felt a buzz in my back pocket and struggled to pull it out from the shaking of my body. It was a text from Connie.

"Dude what happened last night??!! Turn on the news"

I rushed down the hallway and turned on the TV to reveal my dream in a visual reality. It was footage that looked as if it was taken from somebody's phone of the Shadowstrike pushing me away and going after the built thug with the headline 'The Shadow-Strikes again.' It was quite blurry so you couldn't make out my face but you could definitely tell that without a doubt that the purple blur attacking those thugs was the Shadow.

"Shit!"

"Eren Jaeger watch you mouth!" I heard my mum call from her bedroom. I clenched my hair in my hands and started mumbling incoherent words while pacing up and down the hallway.  _This can't be happening. This can't be happening. This can't be happening._ I repeated over and over until the phrase became nothing more than a continuous noise rolling off my dry scratchy tongue. I looked at the time to reveal that I was running unbelievably late for school. I must of lost of track of time in my episode of confusion. I ran to my room, yanked my uniform on clumsily, then rushed out the door, almost forgetting my bag in the process.

 

\---

 

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." I recited to myself when I walked into the classroom full of chattering students. I swore I heard 'Shadowstrike' about five times before I sat down crossed legged on top of my desk with my friends which didn't help my already vulnerable state.

"Damn dude, what happened last night you look buggered." Sasha pointed out, the slightest hint of concern hidden amongst her sarcastic tone.

"Yea you completely bailed, you missed the Sasha's amazing fail." She punched Bert in the shoulder instructing him to not say anything.

"Okay, how was I supposed to know the bartender was... " I tuned out of my friend's conversation which eventually began to blur out as my mind kept jumping from thought to thought. Connie raised his eyebrows at me to get my assurance that I was okay. I shook my head in defeat as our teacher walked in and we all went to our assigned seats.

Our teacher began taking attendance when I felt something hit the back of my head. I looked at the projectile pen and averted my gaze to Connie who I saw mouth the words 'you sure you're okay'. He pointed to to my touch-book signaling me to read it. A message from Connie had popped up at the corner of the screen; 

'What happened last night?' 

I wrote my response back telling him that I would probably tell him at lunch.  _Hopefully I'm still awake or even alive by then_. I mumbled silently to myself.

Attempting to listen to my teacher talk about a sheep named Dolly became easier then I would of thought. I found myself intrigued by my teacher's words of knowledge. I learned that Dolly the sheep was one of the first successful experiments that confirmed that we could in fact clone DNA. He continued talking about his opinions on the research of human growth DNA alteration sequencing along with the ethical issues of stem-cell research. People in recent years had attempted to splice the nucleotides from a species' DNA structure and mix them with another specimen to see if they could create a genetically modified cross-bred creature. It was very hard to determine a final result as most of the specimens died and each one's DNA responded differently.

I was taking some notes down on the teacher's lecture when an official I didn't recognise came up to the door and signaled my teacher over. I looked back at Connie who shrugged then continued to type. I felt this odd sense of uneasiness at his presence and I knew better by then to ignore it.

"Mr. Jaeger, Principal Pixis would like to see you in his office. He says it's urgent." I stood up from my chair slowly and slumped my shaky legs to the doorway. I took a quick look back at my friends before following the unrecognisable teacher to his office. The teacher stopped when we were in front of the principal's door and knocked. A felt a hand grab my shoulder which ignited a spark of realisation. Our school didn't assign teachers to send us to the principal. I went to run but he quickly put a hand around my mouth to muffle the noise and opened the door with his free hand.

I kicked and screamed under his grasp for him to let go of me which he did once we were in the principal's office. The principal's chair was turned so it's back faced me but other than that there was nothing out of the ordinary. I heard the clunk of something heavy behind me. The same type of men as I saw in my dream (or apparently the night before) dressed in all black with a hood hiding their identity were weaving a metal bar through the two handles of the door like it was a weightless piece of malleable wire locking it in place. No way in. No way out.

  
"Ah Eren Jaeger is it?" I recognised the same voice from yesterday. The same voice that grunted in pain as the Shadow's blade punctured his stomach and cut him in half. He swiveled his chair around and there he was. The same Reiner that I saw die looking as healthy as ever. He had his hands clasped together on the desk and a wicked smile played on his face harmoniously with his devilish purple eyes. The same eyes as the Shadow's except less beautiful and more fiendish.  _Maybe I was still dreaming._  I subtly pinched my thigh to test my theory but I did not awaken.

"What do you want?" I dared to ask.

"Oh come on Eren this is the twenty-third century, you can do better than that. That's such a generic question."

"Fine. How the actual fuck are you alive?" I was not in the mood to cooperate with this ghost of a man. I didn't care what he did to me. I gave up trying to survive a year and a half ago and there was no way I could get out of this.

"Tsk, tsk, still generic, you should know I'm not going to tell you anything." He removed himself from the chair and traveled slowly to the window. The faintest refraction of light off something metal bounced into my line of sight. Taking a closer look I saw Reiner had a knife twirling through his fingers.

"You're heart's racing. It's good you're scared. Only an idiot wouldn't be. Like your vigilante friend." I growled in fury at his words. I was no longer saddened or scared but angry. What did this person want so badly that he had to raid my school and get me here alone with him? He turned around from the window and made his way in my direction. I backed away as much as I could until my back hit the locked door. He was standing uncomfortably close, his body heat radiating off him on to me.

I took the opportunity to take a closer look at his intriguing eyes. I noticed that through the bright purple there were flecks of black and grey so I ruled out the possibility that it could be contacts to imply the idea of intimidation. It looked like he was born with it, like it was a genetic mutation, thinking back to the lesson I was just in.

"Really? A genetic mutation? So he is smart." My voice collapsed to my lungs. I made no indication as to that was what was going through my head but he just replied to my thoughts as if I was having a lengthy conversation with him. His leather gloved hand went to my chin and lifted it up so that I was looking up to him.

"I know what you're thinking. Who are you? Who do you work for? Why am I so important? Well I can tell you right now that you should stop being so vain." He gestured with two clicks to the two men either side of me to hold my arms to my side. I was unable to move, restricted again like I was when that kidnapper broke my knees. I tried to scream again but Reiner straight away had his hand over my mouth. He removed his hand when he was satisfied that I was done with my shouting

"Why am I here then?" I thought out loud aimed at no one in particular.

In a swift motion, Reiner pulled the blade of his knife out from his sleeve, tracing it on my collar bone over my collared shirt.

"We are using you as bait... For now... He cares about you. He will come if he knows you're in danger and believe me, it won't take me long for me to convince him you are." He pulled the knife away and sat up on the principal's desk. Though I was quite scared for my life my mind wandered to the question of where the Principal was at that moment. What my friends were talking about, whether they knew I was in danger, if they would miss me when I was gone. He positioned the knife behind his body as if to throw it like a dart. He was going to use me as a human dartboard?  _And I thought the Shadow was psychotic._

I was in too much shock to cry or shriek. All I could do was sit there and wait for Reiner to inevitably cause me pain and eventually take my life. I accepted death as a friend,  _maybe I would see Armin again_  I thought  _or even my dad._ One of the guards pulled a cloth from his pocket and gagged it around my mouth. I wanted to beg them stop, I wanted to plead pathetically for mercy but I was stubborn and just kept my head held high as they used a chain to tie my wrists together to the door. The two guards walked away when the heavy padlock was fastened to the cold metal around my wrists and stood beside the purple-eyed monster.

"You've got guts, maybe you're not as smart as I thought." I shook violently to try and free myself from the restraints but only succeeded in cutting into the bony flesh on my hands sending my own blood dripping down the door.

He threw the knife with such precision and such speed, that it hit directly between my shoulder blade and neck. I didn't know if it anything vital and I was in too much pain to dwell on the subject. It was as if a heated barb wire was being tugged through my tendons, clinging on to whatever piece of tissue it could. I tried to scream but the sound was cut-off by the rotting gag in between my teeth that tasted like old sawdust and blood. It was liking screaming into a black endless hole of my only chance of escape. I was about to allow myself to fall unconscious from the pain when Armin's voice came into my head.

 _"Don't give up Eren! You have to fight! Don't cause your friends the same suffering as I caused you!"_  It was as if a memory played in my head but it felt like he was standing right next to me yelling the words in my ear. That voice was right, it couldn't end like this. If I was going to go, I was going to go with a fight. For my mother, for my friends, for Armin, I would continue to fight 'till my last dying breath. I frantically lashed out and shrieked through the cloth constantly struggling to get the painful chains off.

"That's it Eren, keep going, he should be here in no time." Reiner removed the blade from my shoulder and stood further back from me throwing the knife directly into my thigh.

When I was attacked those many months ago, my knees ended up collapsing and an artery was torn as well as my hamstring being ripped apart. Most of the nerves in the muscles of my legs had become jacked up and it was very hard for me to feel anything in the lower quarter of my body. But when that blade sliced through the fleshy coating of my skin, no amount of medical nerve ending surgery could of stopped the violent wail that escaped my lips. I refused to let the salty drops fall from my eyes. I didn't know how, but I was going to get out of this.

 

\---

 

**_"Don't you fucking dare!"_ **

_"Jean stop holding me back I need to get in there!"_

**_"It's a trap! You know it's a trap!"_ **

_"HE'S GOING TO DIE IF I DON'T DO SOMETHING!"_

**_"Then I'm going, you stay here and keep out of sight."_ **

_"But then he will see you?"_

**_"It's better he see me and not recognise me then he see you and freak."_ **

_"Then hurry, we are running out of time."_

**_"You owe me big time and don't you dare try and talk to him with your mind, telepathy whatever."_ **

_"You should've asked me sooner... "_


	6. Actions Speak Louder Than Words

The whole scene was just a blur of blades, blood, and black as the man in the mask who crashed through the now smashed window held two twin daggers in his hands, slicing the necks of the two guards who tied me to the door and engaged in a swift battle of fury with Reiner. Although Reiner was powerful, the masked man was quick and agile. Everytime Reiner would go in for the attack the man would somersault over his head and go for another slash in a different parts of his body. Reiner became exhausted and the man took the opportunity to take his two blades to his throat.

"You know... you can't kill me..." He said through coughs of his own blood.

"Wanna bet!" The man mumbled through his mask as he took off the thug's head completely sending it rolling towards my position leaving a messy path of thin entrails. The smell was revolting, like how you would imagine the battlefield of a thousand dying soldiers to smell like. A suffocating scent of salt and old rustic metal.

The masked man came up to me and wiped the blood splatter from my quivering jaw before pulling the hefty lock effortlessly, breaking it open and releasing me. I collapsed to the blood filled floor unable to fully process what had just happened.

"Get up we don't have much time someone's going to catch you." The man who broke through the window demanded as he came down to my level. I backed away against the corner. tripping over a chair behind me in the process. I forgot that the gag was still set in between my teeth as I attempted to scream for help. His eyes, they were that same violet. What were these people? What did they want?

"Hey, calm down! I'm not going to hurt you." He stammered removing his mask from his mouth so that he could be heard properly. I took this as a gesture of trust and I let myself settle a little but still tensed as he removed the gag. I maneuvered my jaw to ease the numbing dirty scent that was plastered in my mouth. A hint of nausea overcame me. For the second time that week I let the contents flow out of my stomach to add to the rotting stench. All that came was stomach acid and dry heaving with nothing more in my system to eject. The man in the mask didn't seem to care and judging by the expression on his face I assumed he'd seen worse. I could hear footsteps coming from outside the room of death and at full tilt dashed around for find a place to hide.

"Shit." The man who saved me exclaimed as he hoisted me bridal style and ran to the storage room connected to the office. He moved so fast that my head started to spin causing me to dry heave again. He put me down and held a finger to his lips signalling me to quell my seethe. The room was small, dark and damp and smelt of all old moth balls but that was the least of my worries. I heard a women open the office door and hurl an ear-piercing shriek at the room, followed heavy footsteps and the ring of the panic alarm. From outside the storage door, panicked chatter from the hallways erupted. The man grabbed my cut wrists from the shackles and cursed under his breath.

"This may hurt a little." He ripped open my shirt and lifted my pants so that he could see the two stab wounds where Reiner had thrown the knives. Through the chaos I forgot about the throbbing sensation of torment of my shoulder, wrists and thigh. He started mumbling in an incoherent language with his hand over my shoulder. The words were soothing like a lullaby and I felt myself drifting into a peaceful trance. It ended as fast it came when I felt an unbearable sting come from the wounds and bit my lip so I wouldn't scream out in agony. When his inhuman chanting finished I felt numb. I couldn't feel my shoulder or my thigh but the bleeding had stopped and it had already scabbed over.  _Did he do that?_  My wrists also had closed up and no more blood was gushing through them. The cuts were camouflaged within the old scars that were there like nothing ever happened. The events were getting crazier and crazier with each day. The man opened the door silently to make sure no one was there then flung it open when he concluded the coast was clear.

"Get out of here, you don't want to be seen as a witness, grab a spare uniform from the storage, put it on and follow the crowd." His steps made it's way to the smashed window for his leave.

"Wait! Who are you?" He stopped crouched on the edge of the window with his back to me so I could only see his undercut hair-style making his hood and mask around his neck stand out like a sore thumb. He grabbed his mask with one hand, bloodied daggers still within his grasp

"Not the Shadowstrike and I would stay away from him if you know what's good for you." He lifted the mask to his face and put his hood over his head, jumping out the window. I ran to look outside expecting to see a splattered dead body two stories down but there was no sign or trace of him, not even a thump of his landing. Looking back at the dead bodies made me dizzy and nauseous all over again. Time was of the essence and I had to move fast if I didn't want to get caught. I followed his advice and grabbed a clean uniform from the storage room hiding mine in a already wrapped up garbage bag ready to take to the bins before swiftly removing myself from that bloodied office and followed the crowd of clueless students. I hoped my poker face was convincing.

 

\---

 

Following through with the evacuation procedure hoping not to draw attention to myself was harder than I had expected. Beads of sweat were running down my face and I had forgotten about the blood and grime splattered across my face. The man didn't exactly have a clean handkerchief tucked in his pockets so wiping my face with his bloodied shirt only succeeded in smearing it. Lots of strange looks came my way followed by an increase in pace when they figured out what it was. I quickly side-stepped to the closest bathroom to get most of the evidence off before I hopped back into the crowd. Standing outside of the school gates in my class lines, I felt a tug on my hair pulling me towards a secluded place away from the crowd.

"Okay. What. The. Fuck. Is. Going. On!" I slapped the hand away from my hair, revealing Connie wiping my dirty hair on his pants.

"ugh... it's an evacuation." I was going to try and play it dumb. I'd rather not tell anybody about what just happened just yet.

"DON'T GIVE ME THAT SHIT! I saw you walk out of the principal's office in a daze and your cleaned-up oversized uniform doesn't really match the splotch of red on your neck!"  _Fuck._  I hurriedly rubbed away the spot and flicked the dry blood on the ground with a groan. I swore no one saw me head out of there.

"Connie, please. You can't tell anyone!" I pleaded.

"I can't tell anyone? You haven't told me anything Eren."

"It's not safe to tell you here." He grunted in vexation and fell to the ground with his arms up in the air. He held his knees to his chest in the fetal position and rested his head on them.

"Come to the community centre after training today, I will tell you then when nobody's around okay?"

I extended my hand out to him to lift him up. I always ended up guilting myself into telling Connie everything. I had no right to keep anything from him after all he had done for me. He forced a smile up at me and reluctantly took my filthy palm in his hands.

"I swear to god Jaeger if you've killed someone I'm going to put you into a mental asylum."  _I'm sure you will once I tell you anyway._

 

\---

 

Our school was dismissed early due to the evacuation we had to undergo. I was greeted when I walked into my door with a very cross looking mother.

"What on earth is this?" She enunciated, holding up a newspaper that had a screenshot of the footage of last night's Shadowstrike attack with me running in the background. There was a slim chance that maybe she was just trying to strike up a conversation and not torment me about being at a club while I was only sixteen.

"I think it's the Shadowstrike, seeing as that's the headline." I answered sarcastically. I pushed past her in a rush hoping she would drop it but like the night before, she followed into my room and slammed the door shut with a bang. Her stare pierced my heart.  _Damn it._  Why did I have to hate disappointing people so much?

"It was no big deal -"

"NO BIG DEAL! EREN YOU CAME HOME LOOKING LIKE YOU WERE RUN OVER BY A TRUCK AND YOU SAY IT WAS NO BIG DEAL." I ignored here yelling and started to get changed for training.

"You're not going anywhere mister! You expect me to let you go out there when you were almost killed by a psycho murderer. No way. You're skipping training today." I gave her the same cold stare as she gave me except mine was mixed with confusion.

"What the fuck are you talking about? That guy didn't try and kill me, he saved me from a group of thugs who  _WERE_  trying to kill me!" I snapped. My hands flailed around trying to get my point across. She was not buying it.

"You expect me to believe that this monster took out those guys because 'they' were trying to kill you?"

"Yes."

"Bullshit!"

"How the fuck would you know, you weren't even there, YOU'RE NEVER THERE!" I knew it wasn't true and regretted it as soon as I said it. The words just slipped out like her actions as she raised her hand to strike it right across my face. I kept my head down and absorbed the sting channeling it into fury. Tiny weeps came from her and for once the guilt left.

"I honestly don't care what you think. I know that he saved me and I'm going to training whether you like it or not." I put the last of my training gear into a bag and walked past her and out the door. She didn't attempt to stop me and I didn't look back, not once. Everything inside me told me to turn back and apologise but I was too infuriated to see her inability to understand again. If anyone was supposed to believe me it was her, yet she didn't. I was going to wait it out. For once I wasn't going to succumb to my guilt, the only option my stubbornness allowed was her apology. Connie would believe me though. He had to.

 

\---

 

"Cha Rutt... Kung Yet"

"Taekwon"

"Ee-Sang. Have a good night everyone."

"Thankyou sir." The class clapped after we bowed to our master and walked back to our lockers to grab our gear. Mikasa pulled at my sleeve and asked if I was able to go through one of the knife-defence scenario's we learned in class with her. I reluctantly agreed and talked her through the procedure that I knew off by heart from practising with Armin.

_"After you had stepped forward securing the elbow under your armpit, you have to grab the fleshy part of the wrist and thumb joint and spin towards your back, until they fall to the ground. You can't ever let go of their hand while they've still got the knife . You want to twist the knife out of their grasp and throw it in a lake or a roof top so there friends can't get to it later, never just on the ground."_

_"You sound like you've done this before Ar?"_

_"Haha, if only I could say you were wrong."_

I took Mikasa through the process making sure to demonstrate the defense where necessary. I hoisted her back to standing from the demonstration and patted her back.

"Awww so we can't just stab them once we have the knife?"

"Noooo, that's not self-defence, that's just murder."

"Well that's no fun." I laughed at her whiny baby voice and began unzipping my dobok.

"WHAT HAPPENED?!" Mikasa screamed. I shushed her and realised she was looking at the scar on my shoulder that I forgot about. I told her it was from the night before and oddly enough she believed me.

"Can you not freak out like that all the time. God." I grabbed my towel and shook it across my rugged hair. Mikasa once again asked if I was okay, pointing out that I definitely seemed a bit off when I walked into class.

"I just had a fight with my mum, it's cool no big deal." My face told her different. I was heart-broken at what I had said to my mum and how I treated her but I was not going to give-up so easily. Mikasa rubbed my bare back telling me it was going to be okay. Just her touch uplifted my mood. I headlights pull up outside the window. She noticed as well. She hugged me, grabbed her bag and left with a goodbye. The dojang was now completely deserted which meant the whole centre was as well. I pulled my phone out and texted Connie that I would meet him at the entrance hallway. It didn't take long for him to reply with 'I'm on my way.'

 

\---

 

I sat at the wall's edge underneath a window so that if anyone looked in, they wouldn't see me. Even though I was sure Reiner was dead by now I was aware that he may have had friends that could be watching. My mind flashed back to that horrifying image of the beheaded man rolling to my feet. His eyes no longer violet but a light lifeless grey. Being alone in a deserted community centre where the only sound you could here is the rustling of the wind on the roof and the sound of your own blood pumping made me feel very much on edge. The only source of light was through the window I was sitting under. It was too risky to flick on a light. I almost jumped out of my skin when I heard the knock of the centre door.

"Eren? It's Connie. You in there?"  _Thank god._

I unlocked the door and let him slide his skinny body through the slim crack.

"Jesus dude, this is really creepy, of all places to show me your dead bodies this is definitely the place to -"

"I saw Armin." I announced cutting him off. I just needed to tell him quickly and if I stayed any longer I might have driven myself to the point of insanity

"You saw what now?"

"Sit-down Connie."

I told him everything. I explained to him the events of yesterday, why I ran through the forest, seeing the 'Shadowstrike' at the club, the man in the mask saving me from Reiner. He remained silent carefully listening to what I had to say. It was such a lift off my chest to have my feelings freed out of my cramped up mind.

"So what you're saying is... that guy, who's going around killing people for information... is Armin. As in the Armin Arlert that was killed a year and a half ago."

"Kidnapped," I corrected "and I know it was, I know his voice anywhere."

He buried his head in hands and rubbed his eyes forcefully.

"Alright, I'm sorry dude." He breathed out. He got out his phone and started dialing a number that I couldn't recognise.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm calling the psychiatric unit, you need help... Hello this is -" I jumped ontop of him grabbed his phone and ended the call. The phone was slid across the floor and under the crack of a heavy trophy cabinet before Connie could attempt to retrieve it again.

"What the fuck man?"

"You're the one who was about to send me to the looney bin!"

"Eren, your mental state is becoming worse. You're not sleeping, you're becoming schizophrenic and you having delusional episodes."

First Mikasa, then my Mother, now Connie? I felt like no one was ever going to believe me.

"I'M NOT CRAZY CONNIE." I pinned his arms to the wall and yelled into his face. How cold he of all people not believe me.

"THEN TELL ME WHAT'S REALLY GOING ON!"

"I DID!" I felt tears starting to boil in the corners my eyes but I refused to let them go. Instead I let Connie go leaving him lying on the floor holding his throat, catching his breath.

"I'm sorry I hurt you, but you have to believe me." I went down to the ground on my knees and let one tear roll down my cheek. Connie's hand wipe it away and he looked at me sensitively. There was a slow creak of an old door opening and closing and I could hear the faint sound of boots walking on a lino floor. Connie went to apologise but I put a finger to his mouth and stood up, trying to hear where the noise was coming from. Connie jumped in front of me frustration filling his face.

"Eren I was just trying to... try... um... E-... Eren." Connie's face was pale and his pupil's dilated. His fingers pointed behind my head with a surprised look on his face.

As if the events of last night were replaying itself, the boy that I believed to be Armin standing right in front of me, a bow in hand and a hood still covering his identity. He pulled an arrow from the quiver behind him and put it in place with his bow parallel to his shoulders.

"You two might want to duck. Jean if you will... " As if it was on cue Connie and I were pressed down by a heavy weight on top of us. I looked up to see the culprit was the man who killed Reiner earlier at the school. I heard the gurgle of a man choking and turned my head to see an arrow in someone's throat. What scared me more though was the fact that the person behind the slowly dying man was supposed to be dead twice now. Reiner again was standing there, now with a stitch mark across his neck and a deep and threatening scowl covering his face. This time he had a lot more thugs in black to back him up.

The man on top of us lifted himself up and went back to the Shadow's side.

"Thanks Jean." The familiar voice said. I hesitated for only a second before dragging the mesmerised Connie to the side of the hallway.

"Well, he definitely has his spunk Eren."

 

\---

 

_"I thought you said you had killed Reiner?"_

**_"I did just not properly."_ **

_"Fine you take out the ones at the back, I will get that Zombie bastard."_

**_"Haha, I think that's the first time I heard you use any sort of fowl language Blondie, and what are we going to do about your friends?"_ **

_"I will talk to them after."_

**_"You assume he knows who you are."_ **

_"He will after this is over that's for sure."_


	7. Under the Mask and Hood

Rushing over to the first aid cabinet, I pulled down the red crossed bag filled with scissors, bandages and antiseptic and ran back to the spot where Armin was laying, still in a daze. His eyes were glassy, staring at nothing in particular. It had been almost ten minutes and he still wasn't here with me. I pulled out his ponytail, harder than I had wanted and frantically wrapped the bandage around his head and followed proper procedures to check his consciousness.

"Armin? Can you hear me?" No response.

"What's your name?" No response.

"Squeeze my hand." No response. I held his hand in mine, grasping it against my face. I grabbed my knife from my pocket and held it under his nose. The metal started to fog up from condensation.  _Thank God he's breathing._ But it was fast and going at an unnatural pace. I completely forgot he was wearing tight protective gear under his shirt. I fumbled to unbutton is dobok and removed the chest guard which was restricting him of breath. His chest was almost as bruised as his face. Splotches of dark reddish purple covered his body from his eyes to his v-line. It made me cringe and I had to look away.

As soon as the gear was released a loud gasp erupted from below me followed by dying coughs. His eyes became teary but normal. He had regained consciousness but was still a bit fluttery. He squinted through the light.

"Eren?" He whispered.

"Oh my gosh, you're okay!" I slowly pulled him into a hug from the floor which he returned. I lifted him on to a chair and began applying the antiseptic to the cuts and bruises on his face. He shuddered and bit his hand as the alcohol-drenched cloth went over a deep gash at his eyebrow. The hallways were dark and empty. The lights flickered overhead giving off a static buzz which I couldn't imagine had been helping Armin's possible concussion. I double-checked the strapping on the head bandage to make sure it was tight and secured.

"What happened Eren?" I ringed out the cloth in a bag and started shaking it dry.

"You would think that if bullies knew you did martial arts they wouldn't pick on you." I began to rant "Turns out, it only brings more of the teasing, name-calling and the 'come on show me what you got' type comments. Why can't people just realise that martial arts isn't about fighting others, we do it so we don't have to fight. Martial arts is an art form - precision, discipline, strategy. It's not brutality, barbarity and violence - that's for untrained people who feel they need to prove a point in the real world. We do it so that if we get into a dangerous situation we can avoid major savagery and instead quickly get out of the situation and run." It seemed cowardly but if you thought about it, would you rather have stayed and gotten your head beaten in just so you can so you got 'revenge' or would you rather incapacitate them as fast as you can and run away so you don't get hurt. Self-defence can only get you so far. He sighed at my response.

I dabbed the marks on Armin's body with a hot towel that I found in the first aid kit along with a cold pack which I gave Armin to place on his swollen jaw. I heard a click as he popped it back into place. He removed the pack and held it under his chin examining it thoroughly. I didn't understand why at first but before I could gather my thoughts on the matter it was thrown against the locker door behind me. He placed his elbows on his knees and buried his face in his hands. I stood and stroked the back of his head to calm him down. It was one of the only ways I knew worked to ease him, to some extent.

"What. Happened." He muffled sternly through his palms.

"The Jocks. They came out of nowhere. When you came out to go to training they attacked us. They pinned me by my throat and I couldn't get to you, I'm so sorry Ar." I gave my hand to him to lift him up. An annoyed emotion was handed back to me.

"It's fine Eren, I can get up myself." He struggled to lift himself off the chair. He began coughing up blood and was really dizzy from hitting his head on the pavement. I instinctively went to support him but he pushed me back.

"I'm sick of it."

"Sick of what? Armin you should go to a hos - "

"You apologising for not protecting me. I'm sick of being a burden, Eren. I'm done." I was surprised by the furious glint in his eye and the rage that usually encompassed me now smothered in his voice.

"Armin, you're still a bit out of it, just sit dow -"

"NO EREN!." He slammed me against the locker where the cold pack was thrown with a massive clunk. I had never realised how strong he was. Even in his weakened state I couldn't get out of his hold. His eyebrows were furrowed and his teeth grinded together in fury. It was terrifying.

His breath hitched. His gaze weakened and his pupils rolled to the back of his head as he collapsed to his knees. I could hear that he was trying so hard not to cry out of frustration. I slid down against the lockers to the ground. I balled up my fists and hit the locker doors as hard as I could. My hand bruised and a large dent was imprinted into the metal. It was getting ridiculous how people treated us differently. We didn't deserve it, I knew that. I didn't know what killed me more though. The fact that we were always picked on or that we just blatantly accepted it.

"I don't want to have to be protected." He breathed finally. He stood up over me, unwrapping the bandage from his head and placing his hair back into a short messy ponytail. He went over to where his gear was and started to place the chest guard back on.

"No wait Ar you can't g-"

"I'm going to start taking martial arts more seriously and I want you to as well. I want to be able to protect myself if worst comes to worst. I promise you, we are not going to be the victim anymore."

I wanted to tell him to stop, that he should just go home and rest from what he had just been through. I had never witnessed him like this so I didn't know what to do. After he put his shirt back on I broke the uneasy silence.

"Hey Ar? We will do this. We will become the best ninja assassins to ever walk the planet. No one will ever dream of picking on us." He smiled and gave me a determined smirk.

"Hell yeah we will." He was limping but I wasn't going to say anything. He was in the zone. We got many concerned looks when we bowed at the dojang door with evil grins on our faces. I was still worried about his health but I admired his confidence and determination. He worked harder than he ever did that lesson despite his wounds and injuries. He was vicious when he was determined, it was almost animal-like. But it suited him. He had never put nothing less than a hundred percent effort into his martial arts training or had ever given up since that day.

 

\---

 

"Connie snap out of it!" I slapped him square in the face. He was more out of it than I usually was. I kept trying to calm him down which didn't work very well over the symphony of death behind him. Grunts, shrieks and banging of metal against metal and skin was like a record put on repeat. I told Connie to stay put as just the tip of my head peered around the corner. I was instantly met with a shuriken at my nose stuck in the wall. I let out a small yelp and sprung back. The man who I thought killed Reiner quickly came running a grabbed the steel shuriken from the wall.

"Hey did you miss me." The sight was unbelievable. It was two against twenty, the Shadowstrike and the man in the mask who I thought I heard the Shadow call Jean surrounded by a mass of Reiner's men. I looked in the opposite direction of Jean to see the Shadow in the same spot as when I initially saw him. His bow was loaded with three arrows coated in some sort of neon blue liquid. I saw him and Reiner make brief eye contact before a smirk emerged from the Shadow's hood.

Reiner charged towards the shadow roaring at him. He no longer had that sneery attitude that he toyed me with twice.  _Maybe he's sick of getting killed?_  The three arrows flew through the air like an eagle swooping through the clouds, silent and swift. Reiner didn't realise the Shadow's edge until one of the arrows hit his arm. He dropped to the floor with an agonising scream. I heard Connie scramble out of his shock at the bellow and I scurried back to him,

"Hey man are you okay?"

"NO I AM NOT OKAY!" Connie screamed pushing himself to his feet.

A hand suddenly grabbed the top of my hair and pulled me back up. My neck and back cracked violently as my body was towed. I tilted my head behind me and saw the upside down scowl of Mikasa.

"What are you doing here Mikasa?" I stammered. She couldn't be here it was too dangerous

"No you don't get to ask questions. Who the fuck are they." Mikasa stood up and towered over me. How was I supposed to explain this dire situation?

I felt the thud of something heavy hit the ground. All three of us looked to see Reiner slumping across the hallway with a hand on his arm where the arrow had hit. We all took a few steps back so we wouldn't be seen. There was a cloud of steam surrounding him that made him look like he was floating in a bubble of smoke. A scream of determination and rage bounced off the walls as the Shadow lept on his shoulders and started strangling him down to the ground. Reiner was much stronger than he was and the dark figure was slung through the air down the tiny corridor Mikasa, Connie and I were in.

In the process of this flight the Shadow's hood came off to reveal a head of blond hair. The sight before me was both terrifying and beautiful. The Shadow lifted his head up from his position on the ground to where we were standing with violet defeated eyes. Connie and Mikasa were in a daze. I could barely muster a single clear thought. All my predictions, all my theories, they were true.

"Armin?" I lowered my hand to touch his face, needing confirmation that he was not a hallucination. His eyes were not that same painted violet as all of Reiner's men. His was like Jean's only they resembled an amethyst and he had streaks of the same purple going through parts of his hair. He looked exactly as he did in that nightmare I had. My fingers were inches away from the quivering boy when his name was shouted by Jean. Armin hesitantly backed up and rolled to a stand. All three of us followed in awe as he ran quickly to Jean, two katanas shortly materialising into existence with the sound of a button being pushed on his utility belt.

I remembered me and Armin reading about that type of gear a few years ago. It was a device that would apparate certain coded weapons into your grasp when selected. I didn't understand exactly how they worked but I knew they were only available to the military. The weapons were created by special engineers who would create a solid coded version of different weapons that could feel and do what the real weapon could, much like the VRMMOs that I loved to play. That must have been why he was able to use so many tools and they all had a blue pixel-like appearance.

"Mikasa, get Connie out of here!" I yelled. This was getting more risky by the second and the last thing I wanted was to see my friends get hurt.

"No way! That was fucking Armin, I'm going to go help!" My pleads for them to leave were either ignored or unheard. The halls suddenly became silent. We were stopped in our tracks when we saw the symphony's instrument had mostly been destroyed. The only people left in the hallway besides us was Jean and Armin taking on a suffering Reiner. Like the had media said, there was no bodies only an odd metallic steam slowly seeping out into the vents. Jean and Armin were panting, their chests heaving up and down with each movement as they stared down Reiner who was still holding his arm but now armed with a hook-blade. They looked to each other and nodded before they advanced together. The first few swings of their blades Reiner was able to barely miss but one, backslash from Armin hit right at the nape of his neck which sent him lying on the ground. The wound where Armin had shot Reiner was sizzling in the blue concoction that made him cringe. Jean handed a bottle of the same blue liquid to Armin who dipped his katana into it.

He held the tip of the coated blade to his back as he interrogated him.

"What do you want with Eren?" Reiner only laughed at his attempt to coax him into information. He let the tip of his blade brushed the length of his spine making a crackling noise like when you placed an egg into an overheated pan. Reiner yelled a death-quenching shout of anguish as the blue liquid singed his skin. Armin was torturing him for information. I had nothing against what he was doing, other than it was Armin who was doing it. The guy was hardly human I knew that, but it was not the Armin I knew and it made me shiver. I was afraid of him. All three of us were.

"I can do this all day Reiner, now tell me, we are not ending your suffering until you give us what we want." Reiner laughed again this time louder and more menacingly.  _Armin, what happened to you?_  I heard struggling from behind and turned to see two thugs holding Connie and Mikasa around the throat with pistols pointing at their temples. Before I could assess the situation one had me as well. Armin let out a deep scream and plunged the sword through Reiner's body.

"Now..." were Reiner's last words before hot steam condensed from his evaporating body. The man holding me pulled a syringe out of his pocket and had it at my neck. Armin froze and immediately disarmed himself throwing his hands up in the air.

"Let them go!" Armin quivered. My captor grinned in achievement as if he had won. Armin's facial expression changed from fear to panic. His gaze moved away from me to Mikasa.

"MIKASA DON'T." Although I couldn't see I could feel the attempt at freedom and escape flood her as she headbutted her captor in the head and attempted to run away. The sound of gunfire made time stop. The man holding me let go of me suddenly and went to the man who fired the pistol and shot him instead.

"Jean! Get the syringe!" I fell to my hands and knees and crawled towards the trembling female.

"MIKASA!" There was blood pouring from the back of her shoulder where the bullet had penetrated her skin. Connie was dropped as well and he came crawling towards us. I fell on to my knees and held Mikasa in my lap applying pressure to the wound. The mumbles of the three captures became louder as they argued why he shot.

"Please Mikasa stay with me!" Her eyes were clouded with tears and the faintest of whimpers echoed through the corridor. I held her head against me and begged her to be okay as hot tears swam down my face and onto hers. The click of a pistol and the shuffle of a the gun's clip being removed from the belt shot my gaze up from my hold. Armin was slowly loading his dual wield pistols. Unlike his other weapons these didn't have the same pixelated tinge. They were real.

"I don't like using guns... " His voice was monotone and his head was tilted down, eyes closed as he removed the safety from both firearms simultaneously Jean backed away from Reiner and ran behind Armin with a chuckle, "but you leave me no choice, pulling a stunt like that..." His eyes opened slowly as he made three distinct shots at our three captors who had us, "was unnecessary.". The searing sound was in the air again and the all the thugs evaporated just as Reiner did leaving the metallic heated vapour in the air.

Armin raced over to us and felt Mikasa's pulse. He had cuts on his face and long scar across his eyebrow. I couldn't stop noticing how different he looked yet how much he hadn't changed. His glint of concern was still the same yet it held the same tenacity as a lion in a pen full of wounded lambs. Out of instinct I backed away from Armin. I hated that I was afraid of him but everything was too much to register and cowering was my go-to in times of confusion.

"Jean put her on a table." Jean gently removed Mikasa from my grasp, asking where the nearest elevated surface was. I stood up and led him to the Cafeteria where Jean laid the passed out victim on the metal table closely followed by Armin and a shivering Connie. Jean pulled down her shirt to look at the wound which hadn't stopped bleeding. He went to do the same movements and incantation as he did earlier in the storage room to me but stopped after a short time and collapsed to the ground. Armin rushed over and wiped the blood coming from his nose.

"It's okay I'll do it, you rest, you've done more than enough." Armin insisted. Jean gave him a nod and Armin stood over Mikasa. He looked at me and flicked his head Connie's way motioning me to help him calm down. Repeating those same incoherent phrases, again like before began lulling me into a slumber as I hesitantly went to comfort Connie who was sitting legs dangling off a table.

"Connie, are you okay?"

"No. Eren, I'm so, so sorry I didn't believe you." He put an arm around me and pulled me into a hug.

"It's okay man, you've been through a lot, we both have." We stayed like that until both our tears dried and Armin stopped his chanting. Armin wiped his hands on his sides and strode towards us with a frown on his face. He looked tired which I didn't find surprising given what he just did.

 

\---

 

"She's okay, she won't remember anything though so give her time to come to. You can go see her if you want." He rubbed the back of his neck gesturing more to Connie than to me to go and see her. Connie nodded, removed his arms from around me and ran to Mikasa, relief flooding his face that she was okay.

Armin hoisted himself up so he was now seated in the same place as Connie was just before. He pulled out the syringe that was threatened at my neck and a vial from a pouch on his belt. He injected the liquid into the vial and swished it around staring intently into it.

"Is it really you?" I finally said after minutes of agonizing silence. He refused to look my way but slowly nodded. I knew I had only just reunited with him but I needed to know, "What happened?" He shook his head and jumped down to face me directly.

"You were lucky he was bluffing, this is nothing but glucose mixed with water." He smashed the vial against the wall and buried his eyes into his hands.

"No one can know we were here, tell Connie as well, this night never happened."

"Armin, but -"

"No" He grabbed my shoulders and pierced my eyes with his. He sighed and looked down. Reaching for his back pocket he grabbed what looked like a necklace charm with a black rope strung through the top of it. It was in the shape of two wings over a shield with four blades coming out the corners. He held out my palm and placed it into my cold and clammy hands. He took my fingers and wrapped it around the stone charm. As soon as the charm it my cold clammy skin, I noticed the drowsy sensation had uplifted itself and no longer was with me.

"I need you to keep this with you at all times. Promise me. Promise me you won't ever let this out of your sight." He was dead serious as he spoke. I had no idea what this was but it was from Armin and I figured he wouldn't say anything like that without the intention of it being important. His appearance still held me on edge but his voice was just the same calming tone that I remembered that it made my anxiety settle.

"Armin I -"

"Promise Me!"

"I... I promise." He removed his hands from me and went to Jean who was still sitting on the floor catching his breath. He asked if he was okay to leave to which he nodded and put the mask and hood over his face. I jumped off my bench and hurried towards them.

"You're leaving? Again?" I barked. I was sick of this, I just got Armin back, I didn't want to lose him again.

"We have to Eren, I'm sorry just... just remember what I said. Not a soul." I nodded and looked over to Connie who was staring at us expectantly. Armin put on his hood and followed Jean's lead as he opened a window and jumped out. Armin stopped as he held the panes of the glass. His new eyes found mine.

"I'm sorry Eren, for everything." I ran to the window after I heard the thud of him landing. I saw them in the distance running quickly, disappearing into the darkness of the forest.

"Eren, look, it's like it wasn't even there." I stood over Mikasa who was sound asleep. Connie was right the wound had completely healed over, unlike my one that just lightly scabbed. A million more questions raced through my head but I was too exhausted to bring them to sense. The only thing that made sense was that there was no doubt that Armin was alive.

Night time ambience of the cricket's shrill, the whistle of the wind and the distant police sirens concentrated through the open window. I hoped and prayed that those sirens weren't meant for us.

Connie clicked his tongue and crossed his arms over the table bench.

"Well, that's one way to spend your Friday night." I clenched the necklace in my hand and put the rope over my neck. I kept hold of it like it was the most important thing in the world, and to me it was. I would guard it with my life. It was the only gateway that would allow me to see him again. I had to. I had to see Armin again.

 

\---

 

**_"Did you give him the Talisman?"_ **

_"Yea"_

**_"Don't look so glum dude, Reiner's gone, Eren's safe."_ **

_"You didn't hear what Reiner was saying to me, he's anything but safe."_

**_"Oh right... You know I'm going to have to report this to Rivaille."_ **

_"I know, I won't tell him helped, you better head off now before he gets suspicious."_

**_"Where are you going to go?"_ **

_"My intentions haven't changed."_

**_"You're still going to go to Karanese? To the base?"_ **

_"It's where they came from, it's where I will get answers."_

**_"That place is swarming with Military Police, not to mention the Garrison Regiment from the Titan Commandment!"_ **

_"I don't care I'm going and I'm taking Eren with me."_

**_"Are you insane."_ **

_"So people say... "_

**_"Is this really about Eren, or is this about you?"_ **

_"Is that relevant?"_

**_"In this case, yes."_ **

_"Then both, I will meet you back at HQ once I get what I need."_

**_"Fine... Just... don't die in the process..."_ **

_"Sure. Same to you."_


	8. The Devil's Lair

The afternoon sun waned outside my window creating lined shadows over my bed and wall and also providing a source of light to the novel I had my nose stuck into. It had been weeks since the incident at the community center and I hadn't heard anything from Reiner, the thugs or Armin. Mikasa, Connie and I were called to the police station soon after the events occurred. Mikasa, like Armin had said, didn't remember much, only that she had mistaken the headlights of her dad's car for someone else's and so came back to ask for a lift with me. We told her that Connie came to get us and that she slipped and hit her head, knocking her out. It killed me to lie to her but I had to respect Armin's wishes of confidentiality. Connie and I agreed on the story that he came to pick me up from training when a group of robbers came and trashed the place. Thanks to Armin's healing ability or whatever it was, the police never questioned the bullet wound that had almost completely faded into a white circle on Mikasa's shoulder.

Connie attended sessions with the school counselor every other day and despite his plea for me to also go, I refused. My doctor referred me to a shrink when I tried to end my life and I hated it. I knew what was wrong with me and didn't appreciate her telling me it was okay to feel the way I was feeling and emphasise the fact that I was different from everybody else, needing medication to stabilize myself. The pills never worked and I stopped taking them after a week or so.

The winged necklace that Armin gave me never came off my neck. It offered that grim reminder that Armin was alive in person, yet still dead in my heart. He wasn't the Armin I remembered and I tried my hardest to forget about him but the charm always brought me back to him. Anger progressively connected itself with the thought of him. His name now filled my heart with rage rather than sadness. The 'Shadowstrike' hadn't been on the news since the attack at the club but I devoted a lot of my time into researching where else it was spotted. I wanted to know more about what Armin was trying to achieve with this whole villain, vigilante persona. I wanted to know why he became a monster in the first place and why he terrorised so many people. I wanted to know why he decided to change. But more than anything, I wanted to know why he didn't come back.

Connie helped a lot with the research as he had already found some of the sources. We found almost twenty different news articles on the Shadowstrike and like Connie stated, all the attacks were at hospitals and universities with labs and research documents relating to biochemistry and genetic mutations. All of them were bias to hate towards him. Names such as 'psychopath', 'murderer', 'monster', 'criminal', 'assassin' and 'killer' were all used to describe him. The more I read those articles, the more I believed them.

 

\---

 

Connie came bursting into my room, tablet in hand. He was panting and sweat was running down his forehead like he had just run a marathon. He placed the tablet on my desk and ran his hand across it bringing up the heap of documents in holographic 3D format in front of us.

"Connie, what are these?" I scrolled through the blue tinged files in front of me and noticed there was over a hundred pages of fine printed text in each document.

"Did you read all these?" I questioned standing up from my bed recognising the documents as possible thesis'. Connie ignored my question and selected a few of them showing the different titles.

"What do they all have in common?" Connie asked, waiting for my answer intriguingly. I looked more closely at the various headers on the documents; 'Ethics of DNA sequencing', 'Genetically altered killing machines', 'Can animal nucleotides take over molecular structures?', 'Who are the real monsters, the device or the product?'

"Um, they're all science-based?"

"No no, look at the stamps at the corners." I recaptured my gaze to the corner of each document, revealing familiar logos and watermarks. There was one I recognised immediately. It was the symbol for Trost University of Science and Medicine, the leading research institute in genetic modification and mutations in Shingeki.

"Are they - ?"

"Yea, these are all the documents that were stolen in it's original paper form from the labs and hospitals." Connie's theory was right. Armin had been stealing original documents from science laboratories relating to medicine research. Apparently that wasn't the only coincidence. Increasing the size again on the documents, Connie revealed highlighted sections of the credited authors of each thesis. All either died years ago or where considered unknown or anonymous. A million thoughts and possibilities ran through my head. Could he have killed those unknown people? Could he be trying to find the identities of the anonymous? Or could he be trying to create a 'genetically-altered killing machine' like the thesis' stated?

These thoughts transferred my indignation for Armin into absolute hatred. He really was the monster people thought he was. I clenched the necklace in my hand and growled at my weakness towards him.

Connie was the one to break the silence.

"Lets got there."

"Where?"

"Trost University." My eyes went wide. I knew this was a horrible idea but I couldn't help but be curious as to what we could find there. I was frightened at the thought that maybe there would be some of Reiner's followers or even Reiner himself waiting there for me. Connie insisted though and my intrigue got the better of me.

We caught a public bus to the campus which was raided by Armin. The whole complex was still closed off with a Police defensive barrier dome. If we were to even attempt to go through, officers would immediately get intel on our identification profiles and be on our tails. But if there was one thing that I could do, it was hack. I was fluent in HTML and JAVAscript which was what most of the systems were based on. Because it was so old, it would of been easy to crack but we just had to find the source box.

We searched around for a hidden computer in the bush land and paddocks surrounding the campus for almost an hour until we spotted a cubed metal box hidden inside a tree stump. Connie called me over and I immediately went to work, putting on clean gloves so that fingerprints wouldn't be detected and bringing up the coded script. It took only about fifteen minutes for me to bring the invisible wall down which shut off with an electronic wail.

"Okay we only have about two hours or so before officials realise what's going on and turn it back on. We should split up and meet back here within an hour or so just to be safe." I nodded at Connie instructions as he handed me a telecommunications ear plug and placed one in his ear also. I grabbed his shoulder before we parted ways.

"If you hear or see anything out of the ordinary do not hesitate to run. I do not want another incident like the one at the community centre to happen alright?" He nodded and scurried off to the lecture rooms and reception while I headed to the labs and research facilities.

 

\---

 

The smell of overpowering antiseptic and lino tiling gave me a slight headache making me pull my jumper up to my face so that I wouldn't pass out. The hallways looked like that out of a horror movie. The rooms on either side of the hallway had glass panes smashed with technology and machinery broken apart to an irreplaceable state.

"You found anything yet?" Connie asked through the ear-piece.

"Nothing, you?" He hadn't either. The lights flickered and the air vents made the walls creak and howl at every movement. I searched through each lab and desk drawer for any sign of Armin being there. I was about to give up my search when I saw a small neon blue drop splattered against a filing cabinet. '

"Wait I think I may have found something."

"Okay but hurry, we need to meet back in about ten..."

The metal cabinet was empty and lighter than I had expected. When I jerked the drawers open it toppled over forward. I jumped out of the way before it crushed my feet and looked behind it to find a loose panel on the floor. I removed the panel with the handle to reveal a staircase leading to a dark unknown room down below. I turned the torch function on my tablet and made my way down the spiral staircase. The stairs seemed endless. The light from my device wasn't strong enough to pinpoint how much further down the bottom was. I found a chunk of rubble off the ground and dropped it down. A few short seconds later the sound of the debris hit the ground and echoed toward me. It wasn't that far down so I decided to continue to investigate.

The backs of my legs were cramping up and my jacked up knees were starting to give out by the time I got to the bottom. I sneezed from the amount of dust that was down there. It was like no one had been down there in years. The walls and floor were made of concrete and were freezing cold. My footsteps reverberated through the corridor. I shone my tablet toward the end of the hallway and an odd silhouette caught my eye. I walked slowly towards the shape. When I got to the room the stench of rotting flesh filled the air. I feared the worst as my light travelled up to reveal the source of the shape. I dropped my tablet and clasped my hand over my mouth to muffle the squeal of terror. It was who I recognised as the headmaster of the university. The man who wrote the thesis of 'Genetically-altered killing machines'.

He was cut in half so only his torso was being hung to the wall with two metal chains on each wrist, dislocating his shoulders out of place. He had whip wounds, burn marks and various bottom limbs were strewn across a bench along with various tools of torture. A bear-claw trap, a saw-cutter, a chainsaw and different knives all covered in a dried metallic red liquid. There were vials of the same substance in test tube racks on an adjacent bench along with a notebook with various equations and diagrams drawn over the blood stained pages. It was very old fashioned to use these tools as a form of torture as well as using a pen and notebook to write notes with.

I skeptically walked over to the table with the book, holding in the contents of my stomach as the stench overwhelmed my senses. I retched and gagged as the smell became stronger. I lifted my hand to my mouth to cover it and flipped through the book. Each pages held the same sort of notes and equations. I recognised the Watson & Crick DNA model and the signature of the headmaster under a section that theorised mutation sequencing. I couldn't understand any of what was contained in the journal, except for the one strand of blond hair that was across the page. I lifted it up and noticed it was the right length and had bits of blood on it. Armin had been there.

I grabbed the notebook and my tablet off the ground and rushed out of the room, down the corridor and up the stairs, ignoring the splitting pain in my knees. I put the panel back in place and lifted the metal cabinet over it with a clunk and bang. The faint sound of footsteps panicked me. I turned the tablet's torch off and rolled over to the wall of the room under the window, notebook clenched to my chest. I silently pulled my bag to my front and placed the journal into my bag, zipping it up. The white light of a torch reflected off the opposite window as the footsteps grew louder. The door knob creaked. I sat up to a crouching position ready to sweep the legs out of the pursuer to come in. The door opened quickly and in that split second I had the person in a leg lock on the floor.

"EREN! IT'S ME!" Connie's voice sounded from the grasp. Realising I had the wrong guy in a hold, I released the lock and helped him to his feet. I apologised for my ability in not recognising who he was to which he forgave.

"I came to look for you, did you find anything?" I pulled out the journal from my bag covered in blood. 

"Great, let's get out of here." No sooner did Connie speak did the bark of soldiers and the flash of blue sniper lights came through the window we both immediately ducked. It was coming towards sunset but it was still light enough that they could clearly see us through the window.

"Shit! What do we do?" I asked Connie. Connie pulled my arm to the doorway instructing me to follow, putting the journal back in the bag and slinging it back on my shoulder.

We came to the corner of the hallway, Connie peeking over the wall to see if there was anyone there. He pointed out that he found an emergency exit that led out the back while he was searching for me. The coast was clear and we began stealth running to the exit - crouched down with minimal noise. The voice of an officer and the flash of torchlight stopped us in our tracks. We rolled into the first open door. Avoiding detection, we held our breath as we waited for the officer to pass. I peered over the window and found three more officers guarding the exit. I grabbed a glass beaker that was only half smashed and gestured Connie to wait by the door on the other side.

I threw the glass beaker against the wall creating a loud smashing sound which caused the guards to run into the room completely ignoring our presence on either side of the doorway. Once all three were in we made a run for the exit. The clunk of the door opening made them turn back and no sooner did we exit the building did the sound of bullets flying past us made our fast pace run turn into an adrenalin filled sprint for our lives. It wasn't just normal bullets either. They were bullets that came from laser shooters. The bullets from those go straight through you in one clean go. If it hit a vital point or an important artery in your body, you would die instantly. Only the elite of the elite officers were to use these and only in grave situations such as terrorist attacks or homicides.

Connie yelled for me to follow him as we ran down the staircase to the main courtyard. An officer was there at the bottom of the stairs, shooter pointed directly at us. In a split second move I found a circular tin garbage can lid and threw it like a frisbee at the officer's gun and leaped over the railing, rolling to my feet when I landed. Connie followed my action, but stumbled. Luckily he wasn't too hurt and the officer was still disoriented from the projectile hitting his firearm into the brim of his nose. I pulled Connie by his pack and pushed him to run again. I followed him towards the open paddock but held him back as he was about to head into the open field.

"You go out there it's a deathwish!" I antagonised. I led him across the wall of the building to where I saw a park filled with trees, bush and perfect cover from the officers. I glanced around to see if the coast was clear and instructed Connie to sprint through the cover of the trees across the paddock. We were about the same speed as we dodged our way over the benches and through the trees. For the first time I was glad I took up Connie's advice to take up parkour lessons with him. We almost made it the trees at the paddock when the sound of a helicopter silenced all other noise. I covered my ears and looked up to see a blinding light over us though the slowly closing darkness.

"THIS IS THE POLICE. STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE OR WE WILL BE FORCED TO USE DRASTIC MEASURES" The man behind the speaker said. Just how serious was this situation? Those were government helicopters. Elite police officers were after us. What was so important that two teenagers had to be killed for trespassing on this particular part of land. Connie was staring up at the helicopter's high beams in awe. I grabbed his arm and tugged him towards the forest at the edge of the paddock.

After we were sure we had lost them we stopped to rest. We were both panting rapidly, hands behind our heads to get more oxygen in. My lungs and stomach cramped and my knees were numb. I collapsed to a sit and got my water bottle from my bag. After taking a lengthy sip I chucked it to Connie who was sitting on a large stone.

"What the fuck... was that?" Connie mumbled. A whooshing noise flooded the air through the trees. Flocks of birds squaked overhead and retreated the rustling forest. I squinted my eyes through the darkness that had now overcome us and saw a glowing fiery spot of orange.

"CONNIE GET DOWN!" Both Connie and I collapsed to the ground hands over our ears as a missile flew overhead and exploded against a cliff edge past us. My ears buzzed from the loud crash, a loud ringing now surged in my ears. Dizziness overcame me and I found it hard to keep consciousness. An arm linked with mine and started dragging me along the ground. I assumed it was Connie's and I followed, still not quite able to see where I was going.

 

\---

 

My back was drenched and I felt dirty. I sat up and looked around to see Connie laying next to me in a forest clearing, the forest canopy blocking out the night sky. The sound of crickets chirping and owls calling was all that could be heard in the abyss of the night which was both calming and unnatural at the same time. A slight yelp left my mouth as something began to burn at my chest.

"Dude, your necklace." Connie pointed out as he came to. The now shining winged fragment around my neck was the source of the scorching. No sooner did the burning cease when the familiar feeling of being watched came upon me. I told Connie to get behind me. A pair of violet eyes glowed through the branches. I grabbed a stick from the ground and held it aggressively above my head walking towards the two lights.

"Eren, what on Earth are you doing? He brought us here." Connie was absolutely calm juxtaposed to my frantic lashing with a broken stick. When I looked back at the eyes they were gone, the rustling of leaves and branches now in it's place.

Armin walked through into our clearing. He looked different from when I last saw him. I wasn't sure if it was just my anger towards him or the fact that he didn't have a hood anymore but there was a certain aura about him now that made me want to rip his throat open.

"I told you it would work." Armin inquired pointing towards the necklace which had stopped it's glow yet still radiated heat. As he moved closer towards us I couldn't help but notice the flicker in his eyes. With each step the vibrant purple returned to the same innocent ocean blue I knew so well. He looked exactly how he did before, despite the magenta streaks through parts of his hair.

"You guys alright? I heard the helicopters, why'd you go there?" Armin questioned.

"Well actually we were just -" I put a hand over Connie mouth to stop him. I wasn't going to share anything with him. I had no idea what he was planning to do or why on earth he was here, but any trust or care I once had for him had left when he decided to torture that man under Trost Uni and use him as a science experiment.

"This is none of your concern, now if you excuse us, we are going to go and try and not get ourselves killed." I began walking away, grabbing Connie's ear when he didn't follow. Armin jumped over us and landed a few feet in front of his, worry plastered on his face. Connie couldn't help but comment on his acrobatic skills to which I punched him the arm signalling him to shut up.

"Why are you scared of me? I want to help."

"You've done more than enough 'help' to that man under T.U." I tried to walk past him which only resulted in his arm wrapping around my chest, pushing me back in front of him.

"How do you know about him?"

"So it was you?"

"No, it was already done by the time I got there. I was actually heading there now to grab... something." I realised it could of been the notebook and instinctively gripped my backpack tighter. Armin's eyes widened at my gesture.

"You have it don't you." I sprinted in the opposite direction. I needed to get as far away from him as possible. He caught up to me within seconds and already had the notebook in hand before I even registered he had caught me. He flicked through the pages and put it in his side pouch on his belt which I noticed didn't have any weapons or blades on it like it usually did.

"Eren, I want you to come with me."

"What? So I can end up like legless Jesus down there? No fucking way!" Connie noticed the tension between us and said that he was going to get a cab home leaving without a word after that. I didn't like leaving him to go home alone but I was definitely not going with blond assassin over here.

"Eren it's not safe for you here. There are people who are after you."

"Yea there is and he's standing in my way"

"You need my protection!"

"Well isn't that convenient." My words were harsh but I meant every one. If I went with him I was pretty much dead like that guy in the University chamber. I kept trying to walk away but Armin would keep stepping in front of me anticipating my every move.

"Let me go Armin."

"Why won't you trust me?" His deep blue iris' penetrated mine. I almost felt remorse for him. That immediately went away when I remembered what he did to get what he wanted.

"I'm not going with you and that's final." Armin lowered his head in defeat and let go of me.

"Okay. Fine. Go... just don't take that talisman off please." I looked down at the charm and rolled my eyes with a 'tch'. He didn't come after me again. This time, he only stared at me with hurt in his features before leaping into the trees and gracefully jumping to each one like a mythical creature from a  _Tolkien_  novel. It was beautiful to watch but painful to bear.

He was my best friend yet I hated his guts. I wanted to not care for his wellbeing but I did. I wanted to end his life and stop him from killing others but I couldn't fathom it. No matter what he did or how I thought of him, he was still my best friend and I wanted nothing more than to go with him. But my pride justified that if I were to go with him I had to protect him. I had to repay my debt to him. That scared me. More than what he did to that man in T.U. The fact that I wont be able to watch out for him because I would be the one that needs saving.

 

\---

 

**_"Rivaille, I've returned."_ **

_"Jean? Where the fuck have you been? Where's Armin?"_

**_"I'm sorry sir. I tried to bring him back but he refused to cooperate?"_ **

_"Where is he?"_

**_"He's going to Karanese"_ **

_"To the Garrison Regiment Base? Does he have a deathwish?"_

**_"He said he needed to find something."_ **

_"Oh I know exactly who he needed to find. Fuck. Get Ymir and Krista here. Annie will fill in their position while you and they go get him."_

**_"There is one more thing sir."_ **

_"What is it brat?"_

_" **Eren is with him."**_

_"WHAT!?"_


	9. Roses Aren't Always Red...

All the foreign languages filled the stadium. Although I couldn't understand exactly what they were seeing I recognised that it was the sound of people cheering their teammates on. When competing, the feeling of being cheered on by your teammates is both nerve-wrecking and encouraging at the same time. I witnessed time after time, competitors becoming disheartened at the sound and overwhelming themselves to the point where they don't feel they could succeed and fail themselves. In Armin's case, the deafening noise only gave him a fix of confidence and adrenalin. It was the Gold Medal rounds for the spontaneous self-defence routine at the World Championships. I was standing in Armin's corner massaging his shoulders whispering encouraging thoughts and advice into his ear as he breathed slowly and deeply.

"Armin, you can do this, if you can take down Mikasa you will have no problem taking the Kyojin's out." I opened his water bottle and allowed him to take a sip.

"Thanks Eren but you know I don't care if I win or lose right?"

"That doesn't matter, just go out there and show yourself that you can do this. Make this the best self-defence you will ever do."

"I guess." His shoulder's tensed and I could feel the nerves starting to kick in.

"Pretend you're protecting me." The words slipped out. I wasn't even sure what I was saying but somehow I knew they would help. My hands still grasped his rigged shoulders.

"Relax okay, don't think this as a competition where you win or lose. Think of it as real-life. These guys want nothing more than to end your happiness." I turned him around and whispered in his ear 'Don't let them take it away from you.' Armin gasped and blanked out. I knew he was beginning to get into the zone but a tear ran down instead. Armin gave me a vicious grin of determination on his face wiping the stray droplet away.

"You're right, no one's going to take you away from me." He bowed before he went on to the mat. The referee described the scenario and the rules to him.  _You?_

They tied Armin tightly to a wooden chair and had three attackers to his eleven o'clock, two and six. As the ref called 'SAY JAK' Armin immediately called and rolled backwards breaking the chair in two and knocking the six o'clock attacker back on to the matted floor.The crowd 'oo'd' and 'ah'd' as Armin executed a split kick in the air aimed at attackers eleven and two. He took the opportunity in the air to wrap his legs around two's neck and spun him to the ground. Two tapped the ground to signal his concede.

He removed his legs from their locked position and back hand-springed over attacker eleven behind him, reverse-crescent kicking him in the tailbone when he landed. I saw attacker six come up from the ground and start running towards Armin who was now one-on-one sparring with eleven. I called out his name, causing him to turn around and sweep eleven's legs out from under him. Attacker six went for a flying side kick which due to Armin's short size, he easily slid under and knocked upwards with a vertical palm press. Both six and eleven forfeited at the same time with a loud tap from their groaning position on the floor.

The match went for no more than about a minute which put him in second position. Team Shingeki bellowed and whistled as Armin bowed off the mats and was greeted by pats on the back and cheers. He ran to me after the team had had their fun and hugged into my chest with a smile.

"See, I knew you could do it, that was amazing."

"I told you they wouldn't take you away. No one can take you away from me." I held Armin closer and spun him around like an idiot. The sense of euphoria flooded us both drowning out our connection with the outside world. Mikasa eventually tapped us on the shoulder telling us to meet backup with the team.

My sweet innocent little Armin was now a badass world medalist martial artist.

"You kept your promise Ar."

"Hm?"

"You will never be the victim again." Armin was startled but then remembered back to when he made that very promise and laughed.

"I said 'we' Eren. I may be able to protect myself but I will always protect you, no matter what."

 

\---

 

The coffee burned my lips as it touched my mouth. The burgundy wallpaper of the cafe accompanied with the dim lighting helped me feel at peace. A feeling that had been really rare to come by lately. Connie hadn't spoken a word to me since last night. We both didn't get much sleep but he was usually so sarcastically cheerful, even in dark situations. Heck, even when Mikasa was hurt he was still able to crack a joke.

When I finally caught up to him after leaving Armin he wouldn't stop going on about how I should of gone with him. Why? I wouldn't have had a clue. Unlike me, Connie admired Armin and what he had become. He thought he was a real life superhero vigilante. Vigilante maybe, hero, I thought not. Heroes don't cut off people ligaments and use their bodies as lab rats. Heroes don't have demonic glowing eyes that look like it was dipped into Satan's crucible of wine. Heroes don't put their best friend through the trauma of thinking they were dead without so much as a heads up that maybe there is a slim chance they are alive. And for what? Were the murders he committed really worth it. Was the Trost professor worth it? Connie thought so. He thought that Armin and his deeds were a ray of sunshine filled with lollipops and rainbows. We had never had an argument like that before.

He sat across from me looking down at his untouched beverage. The ticking of the clock and the ringing of the bell at the door started to give me a headache. I needed him to talk to me about how he was coping with situation but I didn't want to bring it up again if he wasn't already thinking about it. I took a risk and asked him anyway.

"Why didn't you go with him?" Was he really going to bring this up again?

"Connie, he's a murderer. He's done nothing but bad."

"Yet he saved OUR arses. Your's more than once I recall."

"You didn't see what I saw Connie." I sneered at him.

"He said he didn't do it."

"AND YOU BELIEVED HIM?"

"WHY DON'T YOU!" We were both standing from our seats shouting at each other across the table. The cafe had shushed it's chatter and their attention was directed towards our dispute. The manager eventually came round and told us to be quiet. I didn't listen. Instead I went around the table to where Connie was and pulled him from his seat.

"Why are you defending him?" I held him up off the ground by his collar. He kicked me in the shin and I fell to the ground, winding myself in the process. I clenched my shin from the sting.

"He's your best friend Eren. He obviously has a reason for doing this. Isn't that what we went there in the first place to find out. Why he's doing this?!" Connie retorted from above me. His achilles heel was in perfect position from my rear foot to sweep him to the ground. I moved my foot around aiming for it. He fell to the floorboards with a thud, knocking over a chair in the process. I straightway pinned him down, drawing back my fist and flying it forward with force but no technique. The impact left a red mark on his cheek and blood starting coming from his mouth.

I immediately felt guilty for what I had done and let my guard down. He grabbed my shoulders and rolled me under him and starting frantically slamming his fists into my face. I could faintly hear the sound of tablets being turned to video setting as bystander camera's were now pointed at us. The manager had stopped trying to break us apart and retreated out of sight probably to call the police.

"OUR BEST FRIEND IS ALIVE AND YOU EXPECT ME NOT TO DEFEND HIM. WAKE UP AND SMELL THE BLOODY ROSES EREN. YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY HE'S NOT DEAD!" I spat out the tooth that Connie had knocked out and yelled back at him "ROSES AREN'T ALWAYS RED CONNIE!"

Connie's clenched fist was raised above his head. I braced myself for the impact but a heavy weight was instead lifted from my body. Sasha had Connie's balled up hand in hers, the other arm linking his shoulder by her. Mikasa was with her. She ran to me and lifted me up from the ground.

"You know, sometimes I wish you had just jumped off that building." Every muscle in my body clenched as I roared at Connie, charging him with a cavalry of ferocity and brutality. Mikasa had me in an arm lock quicker than I could scream "I will fucking kill you!"

A thin trail of steam started travelling in my line of sight. The necklace was glowing again. I was sick of this. The pendant branded my palm as I grasped it, throwing it through the cafe window, leaving a shattered hole in the glass pane. Strangely the whole cafe had become deserted. Sasha was undermining Connie from her grasp quietly, making sure we didn't hear. Where had everyone gone?

"I DON'T FUCKING CARE HE DESERVED IT!" He yelled. Sasha let go and slapped him across the face. Connie stood dumbstruck, a hand to his face. Sasha immediately pulled him into a hug.

"Mikasa, get Eren out of here, I will deal with Connie." Mikasa grabbed my hand and pulled me out the cafe door. The bell at the opening signalled my obliging leave.

There was no one in the plaza at all either. It was like their was an evacuation that only us four didn't hear about. The whole plaza was completely deserted. The cool air outside gave me a strange feeling that surpassed my immediate senses. It was the same feeling I got when Armin was around. Even Mikasa looked worried. I turned back to the cafe and saw Connie gazing outside my way with a terrorized expression. Sasha's concerned voice ringed in my ears. Connie's cry came next.

"EREN RUN!" The sound of glass smashing, soldiers yelling and guns being fired filled the air. Mikasa pulled me to the ground as we crouched and covered our ears. We scurried back into the cafe and leapt over the counter. Connie had Sasha in his embrace as she quivered next to us.

I peered over the counter through the now completely shattered glass. One of the sources of the shooting finally emerged itself to reveal a man in black with violet eyes. There was at least a hundred odd soldiers all dressed in the same attire and armed with twenty-first century rifles just outside the window.

It was so hard to find weapons from that era as most were destroyed during an uprising against war and violence. It seemed stupid when we were told about it in History. People staged violent acts against acts of violence. It was total anarchy until eventually people realised how stupid the plot was and we went back to normal. Unfortunately a lot of the military weaponry and artillery was destroyed. Instead of recreating the same ones they made new and improved ones using radiation and laser technology.

Sasha was still panicking beside us, Connie rubbing her shoulders trying to calm her down. I heard one of the soldiers say 'there he is' before bullet's began firing at our barricade. Sasha's cries of fear grew louder as the bullets dinged on the pans and kitchenware above us.

"I'm sorry I said those things to you man. I don't really think you should of jumped off that building." Connie yelled over the continuous ringing of the shots fired at us.

"Thanks Connie, I'm sorry I've been such an arse lately."

"Okay I love that you guys have made up and stuff but can we please focus on the fact that WE ARE BEING SHOT AT BY EMO ALIEN PEOPLE!" Mikasa yelled frantically.

A grunt flew over us and smashed the bullet-marked kitchenware down as well as a steaming dark man at our feet. The girls let out an ear-piercing squeal. Firing ceased. The plaza went silent. Connie and I gave each other a look and we both placed our hands on the counter and looked over it. All the soldiers were huddled in a circle in the middle of the plaza. All had worried looks on their faces. There were only about twenty percent left of the ones I saw, the rest generating the the translucent steam on various levels of the promenade. The only noise that filled the room was Sasha's quivers of panic and our heavy breathing, footsteps of the soldiers and the sudden sliding of something metal on the ground beside me. The necklace I had thrown away before was now at my feet.

I heard Mikasa and the others gasp. Pendant now in hand, I looked over the top next to the others who were awestruck at the sight before them. A strike of purple one by one eliminated the soldiers. Until only one was left standing trembling in fear with a gun frantically pointing in all directions. The strike of purple stopped behind the man with a knife swiftly gashing his throat open.

Armin had hazey blood splattered all over his face. Sasha was the first to put it to words.

"It's... it's the Shadowstrike." Armin threw his knife on the ground where the steaming bodies laid. In a matter of moments those bodies would be disintegrated, with no trace of them left.

"Eren, is that..? "

"Yes. It's Armin." I answered to Mikasa. Sasha collapsed into Connie's arms unconscious from the shock. Armin made his way over to us. More footsteps sounded above us. There were more soldiers coming.

"DON'T LET THE SHADOW GET AWAY!" I heard one of them yell to his comrades. Armin ran and somersaulted down behind our counter. He slammed his back against the barricade and touched the panel on his belt bringing out an Ak-47. Before he took hold of the firearm he snatched the necklace from my hand and tied around my neck.

"I told you not to take the talisman off. You're lucky you were in danger before you had thrown it away." It suddenly clicked that the necklace, or talisman as Armin called it was like an SOS signal. It only heated and glowed when Armin was close.

"Where is everyone?" Connie asked the armed boy.

"Someone from the cafe saw me and let out a distress signal to bring in the police. That triggered the Titan Commandment to come out of hiding and attack. Everybody fled once that alarm rang."  _Titan Commandment?_

Armin took hold of the artificial firearm and placed it on the table, ready to shoot oncoming enemies. Sasha was still out cold and Mikasa was too awestruck to do anything. When shooting erupted from overhead everyone except Armin and I were crouched down to the ground with hands over our ears. I was the only one to see that the enemies Armin was shooting wasn't giving off that same steam. There eyes weren't glowing purple and their clothes weren't dark. Their blood wasn't a purplish-maroon but red. They wouldn't disintegrate when they would die, their limp bodies would lay there until somebody would take them away. These were humans.

I yelled at Armin to stop. If he was killing those purple eyed freaks I may have been okay with it but he was killing innocent police officers who were just trying to do their jobs. My words weren't getting through to him. He was mercilessly glued to his sights as round after round was loaded and fired. Life after life was taken right before my eyes until the gun suddenly clicked out of ammo and faded away.

"DAMNIT!" He punched at the panel on his belt, but the weapon didn't appear back up again. Worry flooded me as what seemed like hundreds of police officers came rushing into the plaza, all going for the same blond beast crouched before us.

"Eren we need to go, NOW." Armin pleaded as he instead got out two crescent-bladed tonfas, one in each hand.

"What the fuck Armin, no -"

"Go Eren." Connie had Sasha in his arms and was caressing her close to him.

"If you don't go now, you and all of us will be killed. It's better if you go with him. I don't care what you believe Eren but I know Ar, and he will protect you." Connie never made eye contact with me as he spoke his words, only looking at the passed out girl in his arms.

I didn't want to leave. I didn't want to leave everything I knew, everyone I loved. But at the same time I knew Connie was right. For whatever reason these people were after me and they were not hesitant on taking people's lives to get to me. The only thing holding me back from following my best friend was the fact that I could no longer see him as my best friend. His violet eyes yet so unnatural still held that innocence. His blond flowing hair, though had his infernal streaks of magenta through it was still just as lively and beautiful as I remembered. His features were all the same yet I just couldn't see it. If I was going to die, I wanted my last memories of him to be the blond haired blue eyed boy of the photo on my dresser. Not the blood-stained face of a killer that I now saw him as.

"We are running out of time, are you coming or not Eren?" I looked back to Connie who nodded. I hugged him over Sasha whispering 'I will be back'. I felt Connie's hot tears against my face.

"You better." He sobbed. I gave Mikasa a friendly kiss on the cheek and hugged her as well. She didn't understand what was going one but she knew enough that I had to go.

"Armin, if you can get these three out safely and unharmed then I will go with you." Armin smiled and placed his hood over his head. His fingers travelled to his mask, pinching the dark material. He took hold of two pistols from his belt and passed them to me. He signalled me to follow as he lept over the counter and put his back against the cafe wall under the smashed window.

"No worries, cover me with these." Determination filled his features as he placed the mask over his face and jumped over the smashed window and charged the horde of police officers with a shout. It was never my intention to murder anyone. I stayed behind the wall and listened to the squalls of death of policemen and women dying behind me. A weep escaped my lips as I turned away from the wall and started charging towards Armin, pistols firing at oncoming soldiers. One by one, officer after officer fell to my feet in a heaping bloody massacre.

When no more officers were in sight Armin made a beeline for the emergency exit. I followed him, keeping the pistols with me just incase. We weren't encountered by anyone else which only made me feel worse. How could I have just blatantly murdered so many people? How could I now live with myself knowing that I took part in that homicide? The thought that Armin and I might have just saved the lives of my three closest friends that I may never see again was the only thing that was keeping me from planting one of the bullets that were in these firearms into Armin's head, then another into my own.

 

\---

 

"Jean, could you stop looking so God damn worried, this is Armin we are talking about here."

_**"I know Ymir, he can just be such a bloody idiot sometimes."** _

"Can't you just use your blood-bond tracking to find him?"

_"You think I haven't tried that?"_

"It didn't work?"

"What? Why didn't it work?"

**_"I don't know. Last time this happened was when we first done the ritual. He's got an original gene, so according to Hanji it would of only succeed in Armin finding me, which he could already do. But I thought he had that under control."_ **

"Then how do we find him?"

**_"He's heading to Karanese, that I know. We can just stay there and take him back once he arrives, if he hasn't already."_ **

"WHAT? No way I am going there again!"

 "Ymir please, he's our friend and technically he's still bonded with Jean. If the tracking doesn't work that doesn't mean if anything happens to Armin, Jean won't feel the effects."

**_"Krista's right. I still get glances when he starts to lose control."_ **

 "He's really losing it isn't he?"

**_"It's been getting worse since he left."_ **

"Shit. What if he loses it in front of Eren?"

_" **Eren's in more danger with Armin than without him."**_

"We need to find them now!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Jean (Italic Bold)  
> Ymir (Normal)  
> Krista (Underline)


	10. He Who Can Offer Battle

Armin pulled me behind a wall away from the commanding pursuit of officers behind us. Crouched down on the cool graffitied wall I held the pistols by my head in a defensive position ready to shoot at oncoming enemies. Using the firearm was almost second nature to me. I had never even touched a weapon like this in my life ye straight away I knew how to use it from when I would listen to Armin talk about them from his books for hours. He was fumbling with something next to me, when he got the device out he pushed a small button which came with a flashing blue light and a distant beep. The roar of a fast-moving vehicle suddenly filled the parking lot. An ebony black and neon purple streaked motorcycle came rushing through the pillars of the underground to a stop in front of Armin and I.

It was one of the most beautiful bikes I had ever seen. It was narrow with a sleek and shiny finish. The stealth tubes were mounted underneath the purple streaked frame rail which gave the front and back fenders a great lustrous contrast that made the whole vehicle look like it could travel faster than the speed of light.

As Armin jumped on the vehicle and placed the device over the ignition switch, violet and orange flames burst out of the exhaust pipes on the sides of seats. To anyone else it would of looked awesome, to someone who knew a fair bit about bikes, I knew that it couldn't of been healthy. Armin must have noticed my bewildered look when he stated "don't worry the flames aren't real, put this on and hurry, they're coming."

I placed the helmet over my head and pulled down the translucent visor without questioning the flames further. I climbed over the seat and held on to Armin's waist from behind as he revved the engine once more. The calls and heavy footsteps of the police behind us grew louder and louder as they followed the sound of echoing engine trumpets. No sooner did a squad of armed officers come into view did the bike roar it's engine and took off towards the group in front of us. They jumped out of the way like bowling pins as we exited the parking lot and emerged into the afternoon sun of suburbia.

Armin jumped the vehicle into oncoming traffic which earned us a well deserved honk and screech of tires surrounding us. Even though I had a helmet over my head I could still feel the chill of the wind against us as we zipped expertly through the cars on the streets. The wail of police sirens made me turn behind to see two police cars and many flashing bikes coming towards us. I screamed at Armin saying they were gaining on us. He turned as well to see our pursuers, turned his hands on the handle bars, speeding up the bike.

"If they get too close, shoot at them!" He yelled over the chaos.

"NO, I've taken enough li-" I was interrupted by the sound of laser shooters going past our heads.

"DO IT NOW EREN!" Reluctantly removing one arm from Armin's waist, I pointed the pistols towards the officer's on the bikes. The aiming was completely off but it didn't matter as they had to slow down to maneuver around my bullets. I managed to put a few holes into the two cars windows which caused them to spin out of control and crash into each other on the sides of the road. More lives lost on my account.

As we blazed through the streets I suddenly realised Armin was heading to the main city of Trost. As we were coming to the entrance to the city I realised that one of the officers had caught up and was only a lane next to us. I grabbed my pistol and pulled the trigger but nothing came out, only the sound of an empty cartridge. I held up my other one which also did the same thing.

"SHIT! ARMIN I'M OUT!" Armin turned to the side and noticed the close pursuer. He flicked a switch down the bottom which sent a whoosh through the air as we went at an inhuman speed like a hurricane through to the city. The stench of electric fuels became more dominant as more officers on bikes came closer to us. The crashing and screaming of innocent bystanders made me feel horrible for what I was doing. I hated this, why did it have to be me? No, that was childish thinking, I just had to survive. Our lives comes first.

"Eren hold on tight." I didn't understand why he suddenly said this but my mind was too focused on saving my own hide to argue. I gripped his waist tighter as he made a sharp turn down a deserted alleyway. Most of the officers missed our turn but two were still on our tail and following us down our dark path.

"DO YOU TRUST ME!" He called out. I didn't respond. Of course I didn't trust him but I wasn't going to disclose that information right as our lives were in jeopardy. What was he going to do I wondered. We were approaching a dead end, a brick wall blocking our chance at escape. Once again, he was trying to kill us. This was it, we were done for.

"NO I DON'T TRUST YOU!" I screamed as he sped up towards the wall. We were only inches away from the wall when I gust of air rushed past us and a hole was blown in the wall. Armin did not hesitate to jump through the wall and continue his escape through what looked to be a dark abandoned warehouse. I laughed nervously as I looked behind me and saw the two officers had gotten knocked off their bikes and were calling back up.

"Well you should Eren, I only want to protect you, please just understand that..."

 

\---

 

When we came out of the warehouse, there were no more cars on the streets, no more sirens and no large buildings. The afternoon sun was beginning to set. The vibrant purples and pinks filled the luminescent sky above us. We turned into a singular road which had paddocks on each side. The smell of new grass overpowered the scent of the bikes exhaust fumes. The buzz of the vehicle was starting to numb my eardrums of all other noise. I knew exactly where Armin was taking me. I had been there so many time before. It was the forest we used to go to as kids.

By the time we reached the tranquil peace of the forest, the sun had set completely. Armin removed the device from the beauty and the motorcycle apparated into non-existence, like his weapons did. I concluded they must have been connected to that same device panel on his belt that replicated one of the cicret bracelet from the twenty-first century. I wasn't too sure if we were in danger or not but Armin's calm aura gave me a sense that maybe we weren't in for a fight just yet. I removed my helmet and flicked my hair back to normal, Armin doing the same. His innocent blue eyes gave me another indication that we were out of danger. I noticed that when Armin wasn't fighting, his eyes were back to blue, otherwise if he felt threatened they turned that unnatural amethyst purple. At least that's what I hypothesised.

I hesitated to follow him into the forest but I had no where else to go. Walking through the trees in the dead of night brought a sense of nervousness. Every abnormal noise made me jump out of my skin. I loud hoot of an owl, the crunch of branch under my feet, the screech of a colony of bats all added to the eerie sensation I constantly felt.

"So how've you been?" Armin asked as I followed him through the dark paths, the only source of light being the full moon above us. It was as if he knew these lands off by heart. He didn't once run into a tree or slip on a rock unlike me who could barely see the man in front of me.

"Are you seriously going to play it coy?" I sneered.

"I'm just trying to break the silence Eren, after all you're going to be staying with me for a while."

"How long is a while?"

"Hard to foretell, probably a year, two at most."  _TWO FUCKING YEARS._  If I knew it was that long I would never have agreed to this. I was going to be kept hostage by this maniac for two years!

"Are you serious! I hate to break it to you but while you were off galavanting around torturing people and collecting your precious documents I was having a life, school, friends. And you expect me to just put that all on hold because you feel like it! I don't fucking think so. I'm out." I began to walk away but didn't get very far before Armin's violet eyes glowed through the darkness only a few feet away from me. He looked pissed.

His expression suddenly fell to concern. His eyes quickly switched and his hand caressed my face. His thumb went over my eye which made me cringe. It stung like hell, I had no idea what happened but there was a gash running under my eye. Armin's thumb made contact with my blood. Only a few seconds after he was on the ground at my feet clutching his stomach. He looked as though he was in pain.

"Armin what's wrong?"

"No- nothing. Don't worry about it." He opened his eyes which were violently flashing from a violet to blue.

"You don't look fine Ar?" That was the first time I had called him by his nickname since I had seen him again. I didn't realise I had said it until after I hoisted him up to his feet. The flickering of his iris' stopped and looked up to the sky gently letting out an 'oh no' after a short while.

"What?"

"I told you it's nothing. I just- , I can't let you leave. I promise when it is clear that you are safe you can go back. I can go back to being dead okay. Just please. Don't leave." I was surprised by the begging tone of his voice and sighed in defeat. The streaming of water captured both our attentions. Armin hurried towards the source. I quickly followed. We stopped at a small river. The moon was right above it, reflecting its full light onto us. Armin walked slowly to the bank and looked to either side.

"Yep this will do, we can sleep in that cave tonight." His gesture was pointed towards a small waterfall which I assumed was a cave with the rushing water curtain over it.

"Do you want us to get a cold?"

"It's fine Eren, it's the only place that can provide cover."

"Why couldn't we have just gone to a hotel or something or you know stayed in that warehouse? Why do we have to stay outside." I was getting fed up with Armin's mysterious ways of doing things and I desperately needed answers. If I was forced to stay with him, I wasn't going to play nice.

"Eren why can't you just trust me."

"Give me a reason to and I may."

"I've given you ple -" Armin's eyes suddenly widened and peered over my shoulder.

"GET DOWN!" The weight of Armin pressing me down startled me to a still. He had me straddled down on the damp earth which soaked through my thin shirt. His thighs were trapping my hips in place and his hot breath fluctuated on the side of my neck. Armin's hair tickled my chin as he stared intently through the thick shrubbery of the forest. A red light flickered in the corner of my eye. Armin went tense, squeezing my hips even more. I let out a small gasp at the pressure.

"Get in the water now" He whispered. Armin's eyes were filled with seriousness but I wasn't playing this game. It was the middle of the night. I was about as willingly obliging to jump in to a rushing frozen abyss than I was travelling back in time and switching out the guns that caused Bruce Lee's death.

"No. Why the hell would I listen to you!" I spoke louder than I intended. Armin put a hand over my mouth, gripped my shoulder and swiveled his hips so we were rolling together down the bank into the river. No attempt at removing myself from the travel worked and the ice cold river hit me like a glacier hitting a cruise ship. I wanted to cuss him for giving us both the chance at obtaining pneumonia but his hand was still over my mouth pulling me backward so we were now behind the waterfall he pointed out before. It was nearly pitch black the only things giving off light were Armin's eyes as they began to flicker from their natural blue to that demonic violet again. I could feel his breaths were quicker and his whole body was tense. Was he still going through that pain from before?

Armin's hand was still over my mouth as we silently treaded water behind the crashing curtain in front of us. The red light shone through the waterfall cloak now in multitudes accompanies by the sound of men directing officers to 'find them at all costs'. I assumed the splashing would hide the noise of my thrashing as I stirred myself away from Armin's hand on my mouth.

"What the fuck was that stunt you pulled just there?" I urged trying to make as little sound as possible.

"Oh I'm sorry did you want to get taken?"

"I wouldn't even have to be if it wasn't for you." Armin tilted his head and raised his eyebrows. His hair was soaked and framed the sides of his face with some of his small magenta strands falling in front of his still flickering eyes. The voices of the police became louder and footsteps echoes overhead. I trembled at the fear of the possibility of my capture. Droplets fell on my forehead when I looked up at the sound coming from the earthen roof. The small sloshing of water made my gaze point towards Armin who had his hands pressed together in a position indicating he was about to dive under.

"What the hell are you doing?" His head was under before he could he hear the full of my question. I did the same taking in a deep breath and diving in after him. I had emerged about thirty seconds later with Armin nowhere in sight. What was in my vision though was the laser pointed light of at least ten officer's shooters. I raised my hands in defeat and followed their command to get out of the water. How could I have been so stupid? He knew I would follow him and wanted me to get caught. I reluctantly let the police violently place handcuffs on my wrists as the officer spat in my face. Then it occurred to me that these guys weren't in uniform. They looked more like the SWAT team rather than the police from now. It resembled the ensemble of...  _Shit!_ They are from the same place as Reiner!

The multitude of the situation was grave. These guys weren't going to take me in, they were going to kill me. The soldier who captured me pushed my spine so I fell to my knees on the damp mulch. A laser shooter was pointed towards the point between my eyes. The neon blue light almost blinded me and I had to squint to make out the surroundings. I felt something burn on my chest and glanced down to see my winged necklace giving off a steady light through my drenched shirt. The man behind me was counting down from ten for my death. He got to about seven before a clunk of a shooter falling behind me distracted them.

"Sir? Whats the matter?" I heard an officer say. The man with the firearm pointed toward my head lowered his aim and ran behind me where a gurgling sound erupted. I turned around to see the soldier who cuffed me turn purple and choke on what seemed to be water. It was as if he was drowning in air. My head began to spin and a voice lit up in my mind. The same voice that I heard when Reiner was throwing knives into my body.

 _Get up and go!_  I now recognised the soft determined voice as Armin. I turned back around to see Armin, violet eyes glowing in the dark with an aggressive scowl plastered across his postal face with one arm extended out like he was grabbing someone's throat.

"I said go Eren!" He snapped. His voice was different, like it was taken from the chest of satan and sewn onto his voicebox. Despite just being in that cool dark water with me, he was completely dry. Unlike me who was shivering from the cold and the confusing situation I was in. My foot pushed against the muddy ground and I brought myself to a stand. Armin still had a murderous look on his face that was beginning to scare me. Armin brought his hand down and ran behind me, grabbing both my hands and pulling apart the thick metal chain in one swift motion.

The choking gurgle had stopped replaced with wheezes for air. Most of the soldiers had retreated saving one or two who was crowded around the dying man. Armin put an arm protectively across my body in front of me. A flash of the past groped my mind, thinking back to when I did exactly this for him a year and a half ago. Armin started chanting some odd latin sounding incantation and raised his free arm to the direction of the river next to us. A crash of thunder made me jump and shut my eyes. When they reopened an unbelievable sight was thrusted upon me. The river began to part into a seashell shaped wave travelling in the direction of the three men on the ground. An anchor had weighed me down to the spot again. I was getting tired of being shocked to a still but this was an act of fantasy. Armin was manipulating the river into a wave and moving it towards the vulnerable soldiers.

I wanted to scream for him to stop but my throat had closed from the perplexity of the situation. Instead I tackled him to the ground breaking his concentration. Even though the wave had stopped growing, the force of it crashing on top of the three men pulled them into the river with a cry for help. They didn't emerge. When I took a better look at Armin his eyes had evolved to a full neon violet. Almost a pink hue now covering the whole of his eyeballs. He was breathing rapidly and his canine teeth were pointed and sharp poking out through his infernal smile. I sprang back and scurried away on my hands and feet. Armin jumped on to his hands and feet and crawled over me like a demon. It was like he was possessed by a hellish spirit as he cried a banshee call in my face. I shut my eyes and turned my head away as he held me down to the ground.

"Armin. Please stop." I whimpered underneath him. I could no longer feel or hear his breathing and opened my eyes to reveal a scared teenage boy standing over me. His teeth were back to normal and his eyes progressively went back to it's sapphire blue. His pupil's dilated and he cowered back against a tree. I raised myself immediately to look at the shivering boy.

"Eren... I- I'm so sorry... I di- I didn't mean to-" He brought his knees to his face and cried into his hands. He looked so scared. So vulnerable. Like the Armin I used to know. I felt sorry for him, despite my hating of what he had become. I hesitantly crawled over to him and put a hand on his shoulder attempting to comfort him. His crying didn't stop but he didn't pull away from my touch. Moving next to him I put a hand around him and pulled his head towards my chest and patted his head just like I used to do to calm him down. He didn't pull away, only pulling my shirt closer to him as his sobs began to quiet down. He raised his head and appeared intrigued at my necklace that he gave me. There was a red burn mark where it had shone through my shirt which I had only just noticed was irritating. He chuckled and twisted the charm around in his hands, his head leaning against my shoulder.

"At least we know this works." His head lowered again and smile faded.

I continued to stroke his head until I was sure he had calmed down. It was nice to find that comfortable space with him again but there was still that fear of that demonic state he entered. Not to mention the waterbending act I had just witnessed. I was beginning to think that maybe I really wasn't safe in this world. Not only were the police after me but these people that Armin's been protecting me from obviously needed me pretty badly if they got a whole army to come and find me. But they all fled when Armin was there. Although he was what I was afraid of, I was more afraid to be away from him and have those people come after me again.

"Armin, I will no longer hesitate to go with you. But in return, you have to tell me what happened to you." Armin wiped his tear-stained face and smiled.

"I will tell you everything you need to know. But there are things that you can't know yet. Is that okay?"

"As long as it's for a genuine reason, I don't mind." Armin nodded, pulling me up with him.

"Armin? I'm really not safe anymore am I?" Armin shook his head, letting go of the hand that pulled me up leaving it feeling cold. Armin pulled off his dark dry jacket and placed it over me, obviously realising I was shivering. My hair was still dripping from being rolled into that river which now looking back was now half empty. Armin and I began walking toward whatever destination that he had to get to. I was tired, cold and hungry but it was all ignored by the curiosity of what Armin was and what else he could do.

 

\---

 

"Jean what's wrong?"

**_"It's- It's Armin... he's shifting..."_ **

"Are you fucking kidding me? Where is he, you can see him can't you?"

**_"Yea, he- he's with Eren, he's pinning him down. He's - oh no."_ **

"Oh what?"

**_"It cut out."_ **

"What do you mean it cut out."

**_"I can't see him anymore, I don't know what happened."_ **

"Ymir? Couldn't he have just gotten out of the form?"

"Not possible Krista, not that quickly anyway, unless..."

"No he's not dead! Jean would of been able to feel it."

**_"That's true. It's a full moon tonight that's why it hurt so much for him but if he was gravely injured I would of felt it. No, it was like he was forced out of the trance."_ **

"Could Eren have done that?"

"Eren's not like us, there's no way he could of done something like that."

**_"It could be a clue as to why the Titan Commandment wants him so badly."_ **

"Well, well... it seems Armin's brains are starting rubbing off on you, aren't they Kirschtein."

**_"Shut up Ymir."_ **

"C'mon guys we are almost there..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jean (Italic Bold)  
> Krista (Underlined)  
> Ymir (Normal)


	11. The Bird in the Cage

Armin cupped the wounded creature in  the palm of his hands, holding it to his face to get a better look at its injured wing. It was crying out, presumably for it’s mother, each tweet of sorrow increasing the sympathy that the blond felt towards it. I knew as soon as my mum said we were going camping to help Armin with the death of his mother that it would be great for him. It was small things like helping a baby sparrow that fell out of it’s nest, back into it’s true home that made Armin smile with genuine happiness.

 

“Hey I don’t mean to ruin your fun but it’s getting dark, my mum is probably expecting us to be back soon” Armin stuck out his bottom lip and pouted, still holding the bird close to his nose, petting it gently.

“Five more minutes, pleeeeease.” He looked up with the biggest puppy dog eyes that never seemed to fail at winning me over.

 

“Fine blondie” I rolled my eyes at his childishness. This was probably the fifth time we went camping together at this same sight. It never changed. The busy stream that played as the soundtrack to the serenity of the bush, the constant rustling of leaves in the forbidden wind that the canopy blocked out to the earthen floor, my best friend always by my side accompanying me, it all made me feel at home.

 

Armin rose from his knees and attempted to reach up to the baby bird’s nest. He first held out the creature above him telling it to go back to his mama. It stayed in the warmth of his hands. He then proceeded to jump up and place the bird in the awaited bed of sticks. He was too short, each jump only allowing him to slightly brush the branch that the home laid on. I came up behind him and grabbed under his thighs, hoisting him up. He yelped at the sudden movement but then thanked me and we both laughed. He gently placed the bird back in it’s nest and patted its head one more time. He wasn’t heavy but the weight of holding him started to take it’s toll and I eventually found myself falling to the earthy ground, Armin collapsing on top of me.

 

I still had my arms around him, only they had moved up to his lower back. We laughed until our stomach’s hurt at our stupidity. My giggling ceased when I realised just how close Armin’s face was to mine. Just how easy it would of been to plant a my lips on his. Armin smiled and flicked my nose before he rolled off me and layed next to me looking at the stars shining through the small spaces of the tall oaks. He suddenly shuffled so that we were touching and he gently placed his fingers around my forearm. I turned my head to see that a small tear had escaped his eye.

 

“Do you think my Mum is up there?” His gaze never left the shining moon waning above us. I wasn’t sure how to respond so I just answered honestly, I wasn’t sure. He nodded at my response and smiled.

“I like to think that when we die, we become one with the elements. Depending what sort of person you are depends which being you connect with.” I loved his little theories like this. Not saying I believed them, but I sure was amazed at the amazing idea that popped into his head. I would imagine Armin being connected with Air cause he was so pure and graceful. What element would I be? I didn’t dwell on it, just layed there in silence, absorbing the warmth from the blond next me.

 

We heard the crunching of dead leaves behind us and immediately rose. My mother stood there with a solemn expression on her face. This was odd. I would of expected anger or worry from us being away for so long, but she looked pained.

“Eren, can I talk to you in private please?” I gave her a confused look. It seemed like she had been crying. She sniffled and wiped her nose with the back of her jumper. I looked to Armin who nodded and made his way back to our campsite where the little orange light of the campfire flickered.

“What’s wrong? Did something happen?” She hugged herself across her chest, refusing to make eye contact with me. She didn’t speak at first, like her throat had closed up at the thought at whatever terrible incident had occurred.

 

“He doesn’t deserve this” I heard her say under her breath.

“Who? Who doesn’t deserve what?” Her face started streaming like a broken faucet. I hated seeing her like this. I wrapped my arms around her body and stroked her hair, telling her that whatever it was that she could tell me. She pulled me away and sat me down on a nearby log. Resting a hand on my shoulder she proceeded to talk.

“It’s Dr. Smith…”

“Armin’s dad?” For whatever reason, Armin never took his dad’s name. I never knew why but his family agreed that Armin should have his mother’s name of Arlert. It may have had something to do with that his dad was quite well known in the science industry and that they didn’t want that name to be attached to him. I would agree with them if that was the case. I would of hated people coming up to me asking about my dad or only being friends with me because my dad was famous.

 

“Yea, um, I just got a call from the police station.” Oh no

“They say he’s missing.” I absentmindedly rose from my seat.

“What do you mean missing? He’s just at work isn’t he? He said he was on the verge of a break through and went to his lab in Kyojin?”  
“Apparently he never got on the plane, no one knows where he is.” I shrunk back down to the log, staring at a possum who had it’s baby rested on it’s back. He has no one.

 

“This is so unfair, HOW COULD HE BE SO SELFISH!”

“Eren, calm down.” I pulled at my hair and tightened every muscle I could think of in my body. My blood boiled at thought of this son of a bitch leaving his only son, who’s already motherless, fatherless as well.

“WHY WOULD HE DO THIS!”

“Eren, we don’t know the whole story. He may have had car trouble somewhere, or maybe he got lost, or I hate to say this could of been kidnapped.”

“Who’s been kidnapped?” Simultaneously my mother and I looked at the concerned innocent boy at the trees who was about to have his heart broken again. He must have heard me yelling. I ran as fast as I could and buried myself into his shoulders letting my tears of rage and hatred flow down.

“I’m so sorry Armin, I’m so sorry.” He hugged me back and laughed a little.

“What for? You haven’t done anything wrong?” He held me close to him, with a small smile that immediately faded away when he saw my mother also crying.

“Eren? What’s happened?” I looked back to my mother who cautiously placed a gentle hand on his shoulder and guided him back to the campfire.

 

I stood grounded to the spot, looking off into the dark unknown of the forest. I let the cool wind whip across my face with a bite. What in God’s name did Armin do to deserve all this. Sure his dad was hardly here anyway, but for him to just decide to get up and go without telling his son where he was truly going, that’s horrible. I may not have ever had a father but I knew what one was supposed to be like, and this was not how you treat your only child.

 

\---

 

The moon had disappeared though the grey dust-clouded sky. I didn’t even realise how long we had been walking for or how exhausted I was until I saw that nearly forgotten light. Anxiety seemed to have crept it’s way back into my life since Armin came back. I wanted to know but I didn’t want to push him. Ever since he went ‘demon-mode’ or whatever that odd episode was, he had not spoken a word, distancing himself and keeping his gaze pinned straight ahead of him.

 

What happened must have really taken a toll on him, he looked exhausted. His eyes were bloodshot from crying and he was dragging his feet on the rocky forest floor that echoed throughout the night’s hum. His silence felt defeated, like he had lost a long fought battle. I finally asked him if he was okay. He didn’t answer. I repeated myself, shaking his shoulder from behind. He startled to a still, almost tripping me over my own feet.

 

“Ar, are you sure you’re okay?”

“Oh yea sorry, why wouldn’t be? I was just…” He avoided eye contact again at his last words. I could sense that he was hiding something. I mean other than everything else.

 

“I’m sorry Eren, I think owe you an explanation.” You think! I mumbled to myself. He rolled his eyes then looked up at the hazy night sky I was admiring before.

“Oh my gosh, Eren I’m so sorry I didn’t realise what time it was you must be tired.” I waved it off saying I was fine, but a stubborn yawn forced itself up my throat taking back the lie.

“There should be another clearing up ahead, we can make camp there.” I followed him through the maze of mountainous sandstone rocks that crumbled at my feet that mazed itself through the oakwood forest.

 

The loud crash of rushing water onto a soothing river sounded in the distance past the clearing where Armin started gathering wood for a fire. The wood was damp, definitely not suitable for kindle. There was no way it was going to light up, not even if we had a lighter. Just as I was about to point that out to Armin he clicked his fingers and the pile of logs burst and caught alight. Awestruck, I fell backwards onto a fallen down tree. I pinched myself in three places to make sure this whole phenomena wasn’t a dream. Once again I didn’t wake up. This couldn’t be real could it? The sting of my hand striking across my face proved that this was no dream.

 

Armin sat on a log diagonal from me so that I could still face him clearly without the fire in the way. The specks of the orange flame dotted his sapphire eyes, the smoke framing his face like a long lost photograph. He removed his hood from his shoulders and placed the black material on the log beside him along with his utility belt, an ammo pouch, a sash filled with what was unmistakably throwing blades and the two pistols whose cartridges were empty from the chase before.

 

He sighed placing his elbows on his knees and clasping his hands together. The crackling of the kindling helped to ease the wait. A loud pop startled Armin who then buried his face in his hands and rubbed his eyes.

“Okay Eren, what do you want to know?” I stared at the fiery mountain in front of me and called to mind that dreaded day where my best friend was taking away from me. Remembered waking up in the hospital, knowing that the one person that could take my pain away was gone. Recalled day after day, going to the police station waiting for someone to actually give a shit about the most important person in the world to me.

“I think you already know Armin…” He nodded and took a heavy breath before continuing.

“What do you remember of that day?” He asked.

“Just before I was dropped over the edge, I saw them throw you into the van. I remember hearing you call out to me before a car door shut and -” I couldn’t continue, my lip quivered at the memory. Blood starting coming from where I was biting down on it to stop it’s shaking. Armin saw and had a finger to the wound in a split second. With the hand over my lip he started chanting that same foreign language that I knew could heal the wound. He opened his eyes and looked down at my mouth, wiping away the metallic taste off my mouth. The heat coming from his body was so comforting yet so confronting. He was so close I could feel his breath on my mouth.

 

“Eren, I thought you were dead.” He whispered. I gasped. It never even crossed my mind that I wasn’t the only one who had lost their best friend. He raised his teary eyes to mine, moving his head over my shoulder, moving his new muscular arms around my body, stroking my hair the way I usually do to him. When he saw me go over the edge he must have thought I didn’t come back up. Its horrible to think that on top of whatever they did to him, he was worrying about my life.

 

“It’s true. I was calling out your name, hoping to God for a response. When one never came I gave up. I did what I said I would, I didn’t give them any trouble.” We now moved so that we were facing each other on the log, both our legs wrapped around it as if we were on horseback. Armin was drawing invisible circles on the wooden seat, paying close attention to the little details in the carvings.

“They still tied me up though. They gagged me, tied my hands to my feet, pulled me by my hair but it was okay, I had no reason to live.” He too bit his lip before he continued, digging his nails into the invisible circles on the log.

“I- I let them do things… to me…” It was my worst nightmare. I held back the tears and moved closer to Armin.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

“No no, they didn’t rape me.” I breathed a sigh of relief at his interruption.

“They just played around until their little toy was broken and beaten to the point where I couldn’t open my eyes.” The sigh of relief was breathed back into my closed throat. I could sense he was pained when he said it, yet he still managed to keep a calming tone to his words. His bravery was remarkable.

“Although I was unconscious for the majority of the ride, I knew they didn’t do anything to me. I wouldn’t have been worth as much if that was the case.” I tilted in my head in confusion. He let out a small chuckle with a smile that immediately faded when his voice sounded again.

 

“I wasn’t the only one they took. We were being taken to place involved in the sex trade. I was going to be a dancer, and people were going to pay the business for me to dance for them. I learnt pretty quickly. Got really flexible and strong and became one of the best dancers there. At least… according to my clients…  If I didn’t I would of been beaten and left for dead. I didn’t once think of escape. I had no where to run to. I had no one left. What I didn’t know was that it was all just a cover up.” Believing what I was hearing became harder and harder as he continued but he still had my undivided attention. A million questions were going through my head but I thought best to wait until either the crackling of the fire had ceased or the recount had.

 

“People around me, day by day were being sold and taken home as their personal toys. But the boss had a certain fondness to me like I was worth more than everyone else, and not just because I was a virgin.” I cringed at the thought of my best friend having to dance for some perverted stranger day after day just so he could stay alive. It made my stomach fill with a lust for rage.

 

“I think I was there for about a month when a man walked in and gave the boss an envelope. I don’t remember what they said or even what the man looked like only that he was so familiar. What I do know is that he was the one who did this to me.” He pointed to the magenta streaked hair.

 

“I know he removed my memory because I heard one of the scientists say it when they thought I was unconscious. I remember being in a hospital bed with all sorts of wires and machines around me, scientists in masks and goggles inspecting each of my vitals and petting my head saying I was doing really well. That was when the man that took me from the gallery showed up and said that there was no time and that they just had to start it. I had no idea what ‘it’ was until one of the doctors grinned at me and claimed that it ‘may hurt a little’.

 

“All the muscles in my body burned, it felt like my skin was in fire, like my interior was being engulfed by the flames of Hades. Every nerve in my body was violently shaking but what hurt most were my eyes.” He looked up and as if on cue they flashed a violet hue over the crystal-like blue. He scratched at his skin as he remembered the pain that was there, leaving red marks where his nails dug.  

“They didn’t allow me sleep for a week, I was put under whatever ‘it’ was for that whole period of time until they finally took it out saying ‘the transition was complete’. The next thing I remember…” He stopped and looked blankly into the distance like he was remembering something horrible. He realised after a while and shook out of his trance.

“The next thing I remember was blood. Lots of it. And it was on my hands. All of the scientists in the building were brutally mangled and torn up and I had done it.” He raised his hands and looked at them like the blood had stained him permanently. He clenched them and brought them to his chest and began to sob again.

 

“I was so scared I didn’t know what had happened to me. I rushed out of there as fast as I could, which was faster than I had ever moved before. I broke through the metal doors like they were thin wooden boards from training. I could hear voices from ten times the distance that I usually could. I could jump higher then I had ever done before, but what was the most bizarre was when a group of soldiers came up to take me away all I did was move my arm in their direction and they were blown away at my wish.”

 

He demonstrated the action with a pile of leaves behind me, twirling them in the air like a small cyclone until they hit the fire with a buzz.

“I lived in the bush, too scared to go anywhere else. I was hungry, thirsty, tired, but I would never die. I was without food, water, shelter and in a horrible mental state for nearly a month. I thought surely I would die but I never did. I was taking shelter in a small cave when Jean found me. He took me to Utgard, he was just like me, well more like me than anyone else I had met... ” The fire was starting to die down to an almost inaudible simmer. I didn’t even realise I had warm tears streaming down my face until Armin had wiped them away with the back of his hand.

 

“So… so there are other people like you?” I managed to get out.

“Yes. But only a few, we are rapidly declining.”

“Declining? You sound like you’re your own type of species?”

“In a way we are. We are called Titans.” This was so much to take in. I felt a churring in my stomach and ended up now for the third time becoming sick, letting all the contents from my body come out. Like Jean, Armin didn’t seemed phased. He rubbed my back until he was sure my retching had stopped. I became extremely dizzy and fell into Armin’s arms. He held me like a child as I sobbed into his chest continuously apologizing for everything. For not going with him when he asked. For believing he was a monster. For not protecting him when he was taken. For being the cause of his suffering for however long.

 

“Shhh, don’t apologise Eren, you haven’t done anything wrong. It’s alright, everything is going to be okay. I’m here now.” He continued to cradle me like a mother would their child. I had never experienced comfort as much as I had now.

 

“There is still more to tell you, but judging by the amount of acid you just chucked up I say we can give it a break. Get some rest, we will both be getting some answers tomorrow.” I hummed an agreement, as he let me close my droopy eyes on his chest. His steady breathing and the rise and fall of his rib cage working as my lullaby.

 

The shade of the clouded sky, the dim light from the nearly extinguished fire, the whisper of leaves through the wind all helped me to ease my anxiety. I was no longer scared of the man who was possessed by an evil spirit. I was no longer angry at the man I believed killed that Trost professor. I was no longer saddened by the death of my best friend. He was here. Armin Arlert was here holding me in his arms. Though he may have had different skills than he did and may not have been considered human to others, he was no longer any different to when we met. Titan or human I would never want to leave his side no matter what.

 

\---

 

_**“He keeps checking up on me”** _

“He will know we are here, won’t he?”

_**“It doesn’t matter, he knows he could drop anyone of us in a heartbeat”** _

“But he will come back to Utgard right?”

“If he doesn’t I sure as hell will make him”

_**You’re all talk Ymir”** _

“What the fuck did you say horse-face?”

“Guys stop, this isn’t helping anyone. If you too are just going to bicker, I’m going to go scout the surroundings ahead”

_**“That sounds like a plan, Ymir you go with her, I will do a ground report on Karanese once we get there”** _

“Alright, let’s hope we don’t run into any of the Garrison Regiment or Military Police”

_** “Here’s to hoping” ** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Jean (Italic Bold)  
> Ymir (Normal)  
> Krista (Underline)


	12. The Heart of Humanity

The storm overhead pelted the cliff edge hard. The stoned ground under me was slippery, making it hard for me to get a good grip as I followed the shivering blond tragedy into the cave. His clothes were tattered and torn, face and body covered in dirt, eyes bloodshot from lack of sleep and excessive crying. He dragged his frail body into the dark damp cave. Droplets from his drenched hair echoed throughout the shelter. I tried calling his name but my attempts were only met with a silenced tone. He fell to his knees and clenched his matted hair in his balled up fists.

 

“Why can’t I just die already.” He whimpered out. The pain was too much. I cautiously walked in front him. The sight was unbearable. His skin had clinged to his bones, ribs sticking out like a sore thumb. He was already quite skinny but his body showed that he must of been deprived of food and water for weeks if not months. How could he still be alive? When he opened his eyes they were flashing a glowing violet. He yelled and ran to the side of the cave bashing his forehead on to the sharp rock surface.

 

I couldn’t move he had blood gushing from the top of his skull that flowed down faster than his scared tears ever could. His eyes kept flashing from the magenta glow to the amethyst purple. He was in so much pain yet my feet were grounded to the spot. He never even realised I was standing over him. He eventually closed his eyes, chest heaving up and down frantically as the gash on his forehead began to slowly close. He wiped the blood from his face, which revealed the now healed scar across his head that had nearly disappeared.

 

“What’s happening to me?” He cried out. My heart wrenched and tore itself into two. Who did this to him? I was contemplating what was happening when another familiar man appeared in the cave. The man who saved me from Reiner and helped Armin with the thugs at the community centre. Jean. He looked younger, not too much younger but more naive and light-hearted than I had remembered. Armin didn’t notice him until he was nearly on top of him. Armin scrambled to his feet when the ash-haired man approached his weak body. He pleaded for him to go, said that he was dangerous and “if you know what’s good for you, you will leave me alone, I don’t want to hurt you.”

 

“Well it doesn’t look like you could do much now? How long have you been out?” Armin slowly turned towards the taller boy and lashed at him with glowing eyes and canine’s bared, snarling at him. Jean stood his ground with a neutral expression on his face holding both of his lashing arms in his hands away from him. Armin growled in his face, but no reaction was made by Jean.

“You are not going to hurt me short-stuff.” Armin’s eyes slowly reduced back to a steady violet, the animal-like sneer also fading away.

 

“I am like you.” His eyes flashed from a light hazel brown to the same full glowing purple Armin’s just had. Armin gasped and backed away, obviously shocked he wasn’t the only one.

“I am here to help you. You aren’t the only who has had this happen to you. If you come with me I will be able to teach you to control it.” Armin hesitated still a bit out of it from when he was in his frenzy. Eventually he nodded. He was hoisted onto Jean’s back and was carried out of the cave. I was left alone, still anchored to my spot bewildered.

 

\---

 

My eyes shot open like a bullet in the night. Sweat was plastered to my face, heart racing like a jet fighter in a civil war. Really? Another nightmare? I still had Armin’s black hood wrapped around my body keeping my torso warm. My pants were soaked from the damp ground I had been laying on. I rubbed my eyes and twisted my back, letting off a loud crack as the air from my joints were released. When my sight had adjusted I noticed that Armin was nowhere in sight. Inspecting the spot next to me I saw the distinct indent of bootprints in the soil leading to outside the campsite. I stood up and brushed the dirt off my pants and decided to follow the imprints.

 

A couple of birds flew overhead, intertwining their flight paths together in mid-air, their harmonious tweets synchronizing with the morning’s alarm. The cloud’s had completely disappeared from last night’s sky leaving a blistering light of the dawn sun’s rays on my sweat covered face and still quite damp clothing that made me feel quite sticky. The air was still, hardly a rustle coming from the trees other than the odd creature that occasionally popped out to say good morning. This made it a lot easier to hear the gushing crash of water upon stone.

 

It was amazing that although I came here so often with Armin in my earlier years that I never remembered any of the various waterfalls that connected with the running stream. This one was a lot more tranquil than the others I had seen so far. Peace was created through the fresh spray that was caught on my eyelashes at the base. The fall must have been at least thirty metres high. It was so high that I almost didn’t see the person standing on top ready to dive down.

 

Panic overcame me when I saw all of Armin’s clothes and gear in a pile on a nearby elevated rock. I called out to him from below as loud as I could. I didn’t know whether it was because he couldn’t hear me or he was in his own world but he didn’t respond. Instead he maintained perfect form as he made like a spear and dove down the waterfall. He disappeared underwater where he had pierced the pool at the crest of the drop. I waited there for him to emerge for over thirty seconds until my panic won its battle. My shoes came off first followed by Armin’s hood, my pants and every other item of clothing besides my boxers and the winged chain that never left my neck. I ran into the cool water and began swinging my arms in a circular motion, kicking my legs behind me to the spot where Armin had dived.

 

Like a mole, Armin’s head popped up out of nowhere right in front of me causing me to squeak. I jolted back startled at the blond covered face, his blue orbs only just peering through the magenta streaks. He began to laugh uncontrollably at my outburst as we treaded the deep water.

“Morning, you know it’s like ten? I was wondering if you would ever wake.”

 

“What the hell Armin! You could of died!” I exclaimed wiping the cleansing water from my eyes.

“I think we have established that it’s not that easy for me to die.” He said simply, slowly breast stroking his way to the back to his pile of clothes. A dark mark caught my attention when he came out of the water. His back was towards me, under the space of his prominently noticeable oblique muscles was a strange marking, like a tribal tattoo on his lower back.

 

When I also came out of the water, I asked, “what’s that on your back?” It had an ‘S’ shape in the middle of a square-diamond surrounded by dark claw scratches. While using his shirt to dry himself he turned and looked down at his tattoo. I frown covered his face at the sight.

“Oh, that’s um… that’s the Titan symbol. I don’t remember when I got it, only that one day it was there after I escaped that lab. Every Titan has one, it’s like the creator’s trademark, kind of dehumanising don’t you think?” He turned fully now exposing his amazingly toned body that almost gleamed with the radiance of the sun’s reflection. It was almost impossible to take my eyes off him.

 

I found my gaze inspecting every square inch of his body. It went from his traps down to his pecks until they met his toned stomach and dominant v-line that had me at a loss for words. In all the years I had known Armin I had never even dreamed of him looking as beautiful as this. It took everything inside of me to not get a hard on in front of my best friend.

“Uh Eren…” He gestured towards my boxers where a bulge was poking out. _Damnit!_ My face turned red as a beetroot. I awkwardly started putting my clothes back on with haste as Armin sighed and continued to put his clothes on.

 

“You know you don’t have to be embarrassed about that stuff with me. I think we’ve known each other for long enough to know what morning wood looks like.” He chuckled out. I was thankful he didn’t think I was checking him out but that still didn’t ease the embarrassment of the situation. Once we were both dressed he asked if I was ready to go. Once I agreed I gave him back his hood and we started our journey to God knows where.

 

“Oh I almost forgot…” Armin pulled out a pyramid shaped device that I recognised as a storage modulator. He tapped the three-dimensional object bringing it to life. He placed his dark hood in it and pulled out another one of those weapon panels that he uses along with a water bottle that he quickly went and filled up from the stream. When he returned he held the blue device out to me and I took it in both hands. It was lighter than it looked. The slim rectangular tablet nearly replicated my school one. The thought of school made me slightly depressed. I wondered what Connie and the others were doing now. Whether they got out of that plaza safely, if they had gone to the police station to search for me or if they just continued there lives like my non-existence didn’t make a difference. Armin’s voice broke me out of my state.

 

“It’s called a Blade Apparater.” I shook back to the real world as Armin showed me how the device worked. I learned that it was designed with over fifty different weapons from different time eras and countries around the world. He showed me how to search them and form them so that they fit my height and strength.

“How tall are you again? In centimeters if you can?”

“Uh… hundred and seventy I think.” He put the number into the Blade Apparater and pushed a confirmation. A few seconds later a teal sharpened katana materialised into my hands. It was so light, so maneuverable, it made me feel like I was back at the World Championships again about to go onto the mats to do my weapon demonstration. It was identical to my own. The same snake-skin pattern on the handle, the curved angle of the blade sharpened so finely that the smallest prick on the metal would leave a scar. I twirled the handle around my finger and passed it from hand to hand, testing out its capabilities with each strike and slice through the air.

 

“Makes you feel nostalgic doesn’t it?” Armin asked, arms crossed with a pleased expression.

“I’ve set it as your go-to preferred BA... or blade apparition. When you need something quickly, just brush your hand across the top and the BA will appear in your hand. If it breaks it will vaporise back and it will take some time for the coding to repair itself. If that happens you going to have to manually select a BA or choose one of the few defaults ones provided.” He passed the Blade Apparater back to me and showed me the motion to button to touch when I want the weapon to go back. I brushed my thumb over it and just as he said the blade left my grasp leaving my hands feeling strangely cold.

“Let’s hope you never have to use it.”

 

\---

 

We had been non-stop walking for almost six hours and now we were beginning our ascent up a steep gravelled mountain.

“So where... exactly... are we going?” I asked through puffs for air. My muscles were shaking from lack of rest. I thought that with each step my knees were going to give out but I didn’t want to appear weak in front of Armin and ask to stop. Unlike me he was unphased by the journey. It didn’t surprise me, he was probably more or less used to this kind of travel.

 

“Did you need to rest or something, you look like you’re going to pass out.” I quickly nodded and dropped to the ground with a loud thud, placing my hands behind my neck to get more oxygen in my lungs. Armin laughed at my gesture and sat next to me, passing me a slither of beef jerky from a small pouch in his belt. I stared at the piece of meat quizzically and raised an eyebrow at him.

 

“Don’t worry it’s still fine, it hasn’t been in there long.” I took a bite of the salty stringy substance and decided I didn’t really care how long it had been in there. It was like I hadn’t eaten in days.

“Damn you were hungry. Here.” He passed me his water bottle and I took a small sip, making sure not to waste it. I wasn't sure how long we were going to be out here and I sure as hell didn’t want to waste any of it. I asked again where we were heading. He answered with a place called Karanase, a place I never heard of in my life.

“We’ve still got a fair way to go, if we play our cards right we should take about a week by foot.” He took another bite of his jerky and looked over the steep edge. For a while I pondered why we couldn’t just take his bike to this place. The image of Reiner, the violet-eyed thugs and police officers which I knew would be after us came into mind and rejected that idea. Walking was definitely the safest bet.

 

“If you don’t mind me asking, why are we going there.” Armin tilted his head down looking at nothing in particular. The same action i’ve come to know as his ‘not very comfortable telling me’ look.

“Did you notice anything similar between me and Reiner.” The assassin-like vibe. The glowing eyes. That determined demeanor. The ease of ending someone’s life in a heartbeat. I nodded.

“He too was a Titan. He works for the people who did this to me.” He pointed to his eyes that flashed from blue to violet. “I have been tracking them ever since I gained control of my abilities.”

“How long has that been?”

“Nearly six months.” He took a long swig of the water while I processed this information.

 

“Look the only thing that’s important to you is that there are two groups that are against us Titans. The Military Police and the Titan Commandment.” He told me that the Military Police were hard to come by, but when a Titan did see them it was best to run. They were the only humans that knew of their existence and thought of them as unnatural beings created in the likeness of the devil that had to be eradicated to bring back peace to the planet. Looking back to his infernal frenzy, I didn’t really have to question their motives behind that reasoning. The Titan Commandment were the people who created the serum that created the Titans. The Garrison Regiment, the people who work for the Titan Commandment were still to this day creating Titans with innocent victims who were kidnapped just like he was. They were the ones who were after me. Why, Armin didn’t know.

 

“That’s why I want to go to Karanase. That’s where the Titan Commandment main base is.” He advanced up with an unflinching determination. The memory of the last time he had that grin when going up against the Kyojin’s made me smile as well.

“I’m going to find answers there. You never know you may not even have to stay with me for very long if I force the answers out of them.” I clenched my talisman in my hand, and odd flush of disappointment overwhelming my sense of reason.

 

“Armin. I don’t want to leave.” He seemed surprised at my sudden resolution. If I was honest with myself I wasn’t so sure either.

“I want you to teach me. Like we used to do in class. I want to be able to be able to protect myself the way you protected me. I owe you that much for the amount of trouble I have caused you.” I thought back to last nights conversation. The pain in Armin’s eyes, the tears that streamed down at his traumatised experiences, the overwhelming guilt coming upon me, making my wrists itch.

 

He shook his head and clasped a hand around my face. I lifted my gaze to his, a sense of deja-vu tracing my mind. The warmth of his palm sent butterflies through my stomach.

“You were never did such a thing Eren.” He removed his hand with a flick of his wrist and a complete change in attitude, going from serious and emotional to light, fun and bubbly.

“But, there is no way you can come with me. I know you will keep my secret but I can’t ever ask you to risk your life for a cause that has nothing to do with you.” It took me a while to adjust myself and scurry up to him, continuing our journey up the slope of the mountain.

“It does have something to do with me. If the Titan Commandment want me for whatever reason I must have something to do with it. All I’m asking is that you show me the ropes so that you don’t have to worry about me if we get attacked again.”

“And I said no.” I crossed my arms and planned a course of action that I could use to prove to him that I could do this.

 

I slowed down the pace of my walk up the mountain, the thick air becoming chillier as we gained altitude. He pulled out his Storage Modulator and began taking out his hood. This was my chance! Maybe if I took him down by suprise from behind and showed him how much I learnt from training he would see that I was capable. I waited for him to button up the hood on the side and went for a leg take down. I quickly grabbed his shoulder and went to lift my knee behind his thigh which would throw him off balance and to the ground. I didn’t even register what happened. Within a split second of my hand on his shoulder he had flipped me on to my stomach, hand held in a wristlock from above. I turned my head from the stone ground and looked up at the blond menace above me.

 

“Nice try Jaeger.” He lifted me back to a stand. You think one would learn his lesson after a while. This useless attempt at taking him down continued until we had reached the top of the mountain. The constant flipping and falling to the ground had me really dizzy and lightheaded. Each time I tried a different lock, a different grab, a different angle, yet he always predicted my moves. Eventually he got fed up with my attempts. He had me in a chicken wing lock. I tried to elbow him and pull forward but his strength was unbelievably stronger than it used to be.

 

“Fine I will teach you, but you aren’t coming to Utgard. Like I said, I don’t want you more involved then you already are, but if you keep up this act you’re going to get yourself killed.” He let go of the lock and I couldn’t help but be stunned that my antics actually worked.

“Hey don’t make me change my mind. There’s a cave in there go rest yourself, I will be there in a moment to heal you.” He sat on the odd pale green grass bed that contrasted against the brown and grey ground. I took one last look at the sun now at dusk. We were over the canopy of the forest. Some of the clouds situated below us on the bed of green. If I didn’t know that we were above a forest I would of thought that there was a great big green jumping castle around us as the leaves were so thick.

 

\---

 

I was waiting inside the cave for only a few minutes before he came back with a few sticks that caught alight as he threw them on a pile in front of me. These weird powers were going to take a while to get used to. Armin kneeled in front of me and started chanting the peculiar latin chanting that I still couldn’t understand even if I my life depended on it.

“What are you saying?”

“It’s a dialect of latin. _Dona peto aer, ignis et aquae virtute superare malum mihi commodare_ Translated simply it means, _I ask for the gifts of the air, fire and water to lend me the strength to overcome evil._ ” His speech was mesmerising, the language of life and death rolling off his tongue like it was the language he was born with.

 

“Where did you learn it?” I asked as he began setting up a place to sleep.

“I always knew it. When I lived in Kyojin, my mum taught it to me. I loved the language so kept learning it in secret.” I swear I was learning something new about Armin every second.

“Why did you never bring it up?”

“I’m not sure actually. I guess I just wanted to be my own thing. And the fact that people may have found it weird that I was learning the ancient language of the dead.”

 

When Armin said it was best to pass out for the night I was reluctant to move away from the heat of the crackling fire. It was uncomfortably silent, no creatures to add to the night’s usual lullaby, not even the chirp of crickets. The whooshing of the crisp wind was the only sound besides the crack of fire and our breathing that was able to be heard. A gush of wind blew into our cave extinguishing my only source of heat. My teeth chattered as the wind nipped at the bare parts of my skin, especially my nose. The caps of my knees gave out as I shivered my way down to the spot Armin laid his hood .

 

“Jesus Eren, you look like your bones are going to shake out of your skin.” I turned away from him laying on my side. I could feel his hand was on my shoulder and his knees digging into my back where he was kneeling.

“N- no- no. I’m- I’m okay.” I said through chattering teeth.

“No you’re not if you stay like this you’re going to get pneumonia, for real this time.” He jumped over me so he was now kneeling in front of my face. He looked outside then back at me. His look of contemplation resulted in both his hands crossing at the bottom of his shirt and was lifted smoothly off his head. He laid down next to me shirtless, his face inches away from mine.

 

“Don’t worry you’ll warm up soon” He lifted his arm gesturing me to come closer and I understood, quickly accepting his offer. I shuffled into his arms, letting one hand wrap around my waist, the other holding my head close to his beating heart. It was that heart that was a reminder to me that he was still human. He may have been turned into something different but that was a human heartbeat whether he believed it or not. We laid there in silence absorbing each others warmth. I moved my chilled hands from my side up to Armin’s chest to warm them up as well. He jumped at my touch then apologised for the shutter.

 

“Thank You Armin” This reminded me so much of when we were little only it was switched. This whole situation was reversed. I should of been protecting him, I should of been warming him up. I eventually fell asleep to the beating reminder of his humanity.

 

\---

 

“What if we are looking at this all wrong?”

“What are you talking about Ymir?”

“About Eren, what if he isn’t actually of any importance to the Titan Commandment?”

**_"Then why would they go to all this trouble for him and put Armin through all this?”_ **

“That’s what I’m talking about, what’s the one weakness that Armin has?”

“Uh Ymir? Have you met Armin? Nothing phases him. Most level-headed person I know”

_**“Wait Ymir are you saying they are trying to get to Armin?”** _

“Eren is the only thing they have been able to get a reaction out of from him”

“So what you are saying is that they are only trying to create a weakness for Armin? For what purpose?”

“I haven’t figured that out yet”

_**“Those sick bastards, no one does this to my - ugh”** _

“Jean!”

“Fuck! The Garrison Regiment! After them, don’t let them take him!”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Jean (Italic Bold)  
> Ymir (Normal)  
> Krista (Underline)


	13. Battle Scars of Patience

My slumber was interrupted by an adolescent scream. I immediately knew whom it belonged too. I rushed out of my bedroom and down the hallway to Armin’s room who was clenching his hair in his hands, tears streaming down his saturated face as he sat up in his bed and agonizingly shrieked. He had had nightmares before, but none this bad. I ran over to the broken boy and buried him into my chest. He had been having nightmares a lot more frequently ever since his dad was reported missing but none as bad as this. He was uncontrollably shaking in my arms. His voice constantly collapsed on itself as he tried to take in heavy breaths. My mother had a night shift work so it was only us alone in the house which didn’t help his anxiety.

 

The moon provided a glowing light through his window to give a dim light in the darkened room. He grabbed my shirt and buried his face closer into my stomach. I began gently sliding my fingers through his matted hair. His heavy breathing gradually became lighter as he slightly came up so that his head was now on my shoulder, leaving a wet tear patch on my tank top I was wearing to bed. His sobs quietened. I continued to run my fingers through his blond hair which I hoped was helping with soothing him.

 

“Shhh, it’s okay Armin, let it out, let the pain go.” I hushed in his ear. He clenched my body tighter as the tears began to harden. After minutes of silence, I quietly whispered his name in a questioning manner, no answer was replied. I suddenly heard the softest noise of Armin breathing unconsciously on my shoulder. He had fallen asleep. I laid the exhausted boy down back on his bed, carefully placing his head on his pillow and pulled the quilt gently over his resting body.

 

His soft snores were so adorable and I found myself smiling at the perfect mess in front of me. My lips travelled down to the sleeping boy and a gentle kiss was placed on his forehead. His nose twitched in the slightest when I pulled away. I turned to walk back to my room ,convinced he had calmed down. A hand suddenly grasped around my wrist startling me back. I was met with two pleading blue orbs surrounded by a drained red. He was still laying on his pillow, his fringe covering most of his face.

 

“Please. I- I don’t want to be alone… ” He hesitated.

I was surprised by his proposal but I agreed. I sat back on the bed and pushed his fringe back behind his ear. He maneuvered onto his back and our eyes locked.

“Sta- Stay with me, Eren?” I gave him a small nod and laid next to him. Both our heads were on the same pillow, my hand never leaving his face. He grabbed his quilt and pulled it over both our bodies.

 

Another tear crept it’s way onto Armin’s cheek which I quickly brushed away. I pulled him closer to me so that I could stroke the back of his head again. Armin let out a small moan of comfort as I did this. He curled into my body like a kitten. As my hand stayed in his hair my other wrapped around his waist.

“Always Armin… Always.” The blond drifted once more into a restless sleep. He tossed and turned throughout the night, and I stayed up to make sure to stroke his hair as the night terrors tormented his sleep.

 

\---

 

Fear is not what gets you killed when you are fending for your life, it’s panic. If you panic in a time where you need to remain focused and rely on the task of survival at hand, it will not end will and will presumably end in the ending of your life. Fear on the other hand is essential for survival. That was the first lesson Armin taught me. Controlling your fear so that it wouldn't turn into panic. The mid afternoon heat was starting to taunt and tease me with urges to give up, lay on the cool ground and stay there. The salty perspiration from my body was so poignant that the ocean would be jealous of my odour.

 

What I assumed would be physical training involving laps, training techniques and weapon demonstrations were anything but. Instead Armin seemed to focus on my mental training. A lot more draining if you asked me. We were approximately half way to this unknown town of Karanase when Armin decided to stop. We had been walking non-stop through this mountainous terrain since we had gotten up this morning. I was so eager to rest my aching feet and legs from the tiresome journey. Unfortunately Armin had something else in mind.

 

He had been lecturing me on the importance of three certain disciplines that were crucial in battle throughout this journey. Adaptation, patience and trust. It seemed as though he was about to extend on one of these disciplines. He asked me to grab my katana from the BA. I slid my hand over the panel just as Armin taught me and sure enough, the familiar blade materialised into my hand along with a sense of confidence from the newfound wright in my grasp. I swung it around in a circle to get used to it’s flexibility. Armin also pulled out his preferred weapon of choice, which was much like mine, only his swords were a little lighter and skinnier and instead of one he had two. He held both the blades in one hand as he unbuttoned his hood and threw it on the ground behind him.

 

We had not made it all the way down the mountain peak yet and were still at quite a high altitude. The wind was a little stronger than I would of liked but it was still light enough that it didn’t obstruct from hearing Armin’s command to get into a fighting stance. It did however mean cause a mess of my unkempt hair which was coursing with the direction of the wind in front of my eyes. I bent both my legs and widened my stance so that I could remain balanced but still be able to maneuver quickly. My back was slightly arched forward, but my head remained up straight staring down the tip of the blade which was held with both hands across my body in a defensive position.

 

“Your ability to defend yourself doesn’t only come from your strength, endurance or even your courage,” he started. “It comes from how well you are able to remain focused in a time where your adrenalin is pumping. You panic when your scared, you die. You get cocky instead of being smart, you die. The key is to observe your surroundings and use your fear to your advantage. You need to be able to adapt to any situation using what is around you.”

 

Armin pulled his back leg behind him and bent it so that most of his weight was on his back leg and his torso was at an angle to the side. The sword from his backhand was guarding his head from above, the other in front of him guarding his torso. The way he stood meant that it didn’t matter what angle someone attacked from, it would be simple to either evade or deflect. His form was perfect. Though I had never seen a stance like that in the many years I had been doing martial arts, I couldn’t pinpoint anything that was out of place. My fingers re-gripped the hilt of my artificial blade as I readied myself for the challenge of what may come.

 

“I believe the best way to learn is from experience. You may have heard of Bruce Lee.” Of course I had heard of Bruce Lee. He was the only man that made history seem interesting. He was who got me into martial arts in the first place, how could I not know him.

 

“He said, _‘life itself is your teacher, and you are in a state of constant learning’_.Therefore your first lesson his adaptation. I am going to teach you the way I was taught. It may be rough. It may be confusing. But you need to trust that what I am telling you is vital to your survival. Now, I want you, to hit me.” He stated simply, never leaving his perfect stance. I cocked my head to a side unsure of how exactly I was supposed to complete this challenge. He sighed.

“I am not going to attack you. All I will do is defend as you try and touch me.” I cautiously took a few steps forward until we were within sparring distance of each other. He reassured me that I wouldn’t hurt him, that if he would heal within an instant when cut, “that is if you can actually get me.” A playful grin formed on his face. He was mocking me. Okay mister know-it-all. Bring it on!

 

\---

 

It was no use. The sun was beginning to go down and both Armin and I were tiring. Me, from the constant three hour attempt at hitting Armin, him from the constant three hour attempt at doing nothing but flicking his wrists and jumping to the sides. I got off the ground one last time, brushing the dirt from my pants and removing my weapon from the ground. I advanced towards Armin who was still standing there looking bored out of his mind. All he had to do was step to the side, and he was well out of my reach.

 

I needed a new approach and fast. I charged at him again, not roaring this time hoping that maybe it’s because I was giving away when I would attack. The metal blades clashed with ting, a small spark flying off into the ground from the impact. We stared each other down, anticipating who would be the first to let go. It was Armin, the excessive weight I had pressed against the collision then sending me forward onto my hands and knees.

 

“We’ll try again tomorrow, okay. Maybe you’re not understanding what I’m asking.” I groaned at his remark. What the hell was that supposed to mean? I was trying to adapt. I went with every angle I could think of, striking with whatever part of his body I could think of but nothing was working. Frustrated I grabbed a small rock from the ground and threw it in Armin’s direction. It hit Armin’s back where I remembered his Titan marking to be and then the ground with a consecutive thump. He immediately stopped as the projectile impacted on his spine. My eyes instinctively widened. _Now you’ve done it you idiot_. He slowly rotated his body back towards me and smiled. He then burst out into chaotic laughter. Now wasn’t really the time to be going insane.

 

“You did it!” He yelled wiping the tears of laughter from his eyes. He had doubled-over so he was clenching his stomach in his fit of odd joy. What was he talking about? Did I piss him off? Was that an accomplishment?

 

“You hit me! You passed.” Realisation flooded me. That was what Armin must of meant by adaptation. It wasn’t adapting to his stance. It was adapting to my situation. I knew from the beginning that I wouldn’t of been able to land a strike at him. I knew he was faster, stronger, more flexible, more agile. I had to wait for that opportune moment and attack at a time where they are most vulnerable with something they won’t see coming, like a simple pebble found in a moment of weakness.

 

I couldn’t help but feel proud of myself. I managed to surpass the mighty Armin Arlert. A sudden chill from the air snapped me out of my moment of pride. Armin grabbed his hood from the ground and tied it back around his neck, keeping the hood part of the clothing off his head. It was only then the faint scent of pines and fern filled my senses. My head perked up at the fragrance. Armin must have smelled it too as our gazes followed the colours of the winds that hit our backs and flowed through our hair. I rose back to my feet and went to Armin’s side.

 

He put an arm around me and dug his knuckles into my already matted hair. I hadn’t brushed it since I went with Armin and mixed with all the panic and commotion, it wasn’t a surprise that a mess of twigs, dirt and leaves were mixed in with the unruly brown disaster.

“You should be proud of yourself Jaeger, it took me over three days to pass that. Then again, I was getting beaten to a pulp at the time, so the difficulty may have been slightly higher.” I pulled away from Armin’s hold and gave him a look of concern.

 

He informed me that the residents of the Titan HQ, or Utgard as the titans called it was basically a safe haven for Titans. When he got there, there were people who had been there for weeks. Jean and another that he didn’t name taught him everything he knew. He already had his background knowledge of self-defence so he picked it up quickly, plus with his new Titan abilities, we was nearly unstoppable. Nearly.

 

\---

 

Orange and pink swirled within the grey clouds of sunset. I was eager to learn more. Though my previous abilities may have just been a fluke, I was willing to do whatever it took for me to stay alive in this new supernatural world that was now part of my life. For the next week Armin repeated the emphasis on adaptation, patience and trust. On more than one occasion did I want to punch his throat in.

 

One of the challenges set really got to me. It was an adaptation test. Armin held a pebble in his hands and leaped to the tree tops of a twenty foot oak within five swings and jumps. The task was simple. Retrieve the stone. Simple was not at all how I would have described it. Climbing the tree was a no go. There were absolutely no branches on the thick trunk low enough for me to jump up and grab. I tried the same tactic as before and threw stones back up at Armin but that didn’t seem to do much. It took a full hour before I realised I had a rope attached to the belt Armin had given me to hold my Blade Apparater.  A slow clap of shame was issued after the realisation settled in. It was overly humiliating.

 

The test of trust was also quite conspicuous. It didn’t even feel like a test at the time. It consisted of Armin sprinting off suddenly calling me to follow him. When I caught up to him I found him in nothing but his underwear diving over the cliff edge. Looking over the edge all I could see was a mass grey fog, no way of telling how high we were. I didn’t hear a splash so I had no idea what may have lied down the bottom. I stood there dumbfounded for God knows how long until a blue-tinged arrow landed at my feet. Attached was a note saying ‘Stop biting your tongue and bite the bullet’. I ended up taking most of my clothing off, chucking it over the edge and diving over it. My assumptions were right as the crystal like water hit my body hard. When I emerged, an amused, fully-clothed Armin stood over me, his BA compound bow in his hand.

“I see you got my message.” he said.

 

I still didn’t understand the point of these tests, he should of been teaching me how to really defend myself. What if those thugs came at us again? I was pretty sure throwing a rock at them wasn’t going to be doing much. I didn’t want to be the one needing saving again. Occasionally he would tell me to get my BA out and we would have small sparring matches. Each time he did this he used a different weapon, presumably testing my adaptation skills again. There was the common, katana, bo staff, nunchaku, short-sword, and double daggers but there were also weapons I didn’t even know existed, one being what he called a ‘Kusarigama’. I had never seen it before in my life. He used it like a lasso only it was a long flexible metal chain, with a sickle on the end.Very useful for pulling the throats out of vulnerable hard-to-reach victims I thought. I lost everytime of course but both Armin and I could see that my reaction time and ability to strategize my plan of action on the spot was increasing rapidly. This only brought harder mental challenges.

 

Another test was one of patience. Surprisingly, this one hurt a lot. We were in a dense part of the forest at this point and there was wildlife at every corner. Again, another simple impossible task was issued. Climb up the tree, grab the egg from the nest, climb down the tree. The impossible part was, doing it without letting the mother know who was sitting at the nest. The idea of patience was to test my ability to move silently. The slightest wrong move and that falcon would swoop and the ground would be my last resting place.

 

Armin demonstrated with ease, stalking his prey up the tree like a jaguar in it’s most astonishing graces. Each swing from branch to branch gave off nothing more than a subtle creek of the old wood. His landings were inaudible as was his breathing, his controlled violet eyes never leaving his target. The mother treated the blond like he wasn’t even there. If I didn’t know any better I wouldn’t have known he was there either. It was like his whole body faded into camouflage with his surroundings.He made it look so easy. Even when he put the egg back in it’s place after retrieving it the mother Falcon didn’t even raise a glance to Armin. I however ended up having a black eye, numerous talon marks on my face and a lump on the back of my head where I fell.

 

These battle scars of patience, adaptation and trust served as a reminder that although I could fight, although I could defend myself to some extent, I was still so naive about this whole situation. I was risking my life doing some of these tasks and these were just lessons! If this was really how Armin was taught, what sort of hell did people expect him to go through in the world? What were these Titans fighting for exactly? What do these Titans who have these unbelievable supernatural abilities have to fear?

 

\---

 

As Armin had predicted, we had nearly arrived at Karanase within that week. Apparently I had been learning the skills that Armin was teaching me fairly quickly, quicker than some of the Titans he had come across in his time.

“How many Titans would you say are out there?” I asked.

“I’m not sure actually, at Utgard we only have a bit over hundred, but the doctor who created us definitely keeps some for himself, and some are still out there in the real world learning for themselves to live with it.” Armin answered. We hadn’t talked like this for a while. The passed few days were mainly his words of teaching so it was a small relief to learn something other than how not to get myself killed.

 

The night sky was approaching. The shrill of crickets signalling that we had to pick up the pace if we wanted to get their, get what we needed and get out before the morning would rise. I was twirling the katana in my hand when a strange question popped into my head. One that I wondered why I hadn;t asked directly before.

“Hey Ar?”

“Hm?”

“Why did you never come back? I mean, why did you never look for us? Why’d you stay in the bush?” I knew I hit a sensitive topic as Armin’s gaze travelled to his dusted boots.

“I knew you would ask that eventually, but honestly I don’t have an answer. Staying away from everything seemed like the best option. Besides the fact I thought you were dead, I couldn’t really think clearly. I was deprived of essential survival needs for almost a month.”

“But you could heal couldn’t you.”

“It’s not that simple Eren.” He went on to explain that even though Titans could heal themselves physically and keep their bodies going in dire times of survival, their bodies still feel the same pain.

Seeing as Armin didn’t have water, food or shelter for however many weeks, his body was struggling with the empty feeling of food deprivation for weeks, the exhausted scratchy sensation of no water for weeks and the overwhelming mental pain of believing there was no way he could make it out alive.

 

“I may be able to heal a broken arm within seconds, that doesn’t mean it won’t hur-” The subject was immediately dropped when we emerged from the forest to see the town of Karanase. What I thought to be a quaint little town in the middle of nowhere was a flame covered and smoke filled graveyard. Armin’s face dropped. I had a feeling this wasn’t a good sign.

 

\---

 

Unknown: “Oh good the horse is awake”

_**“You’re part of the Garrison Regiment aren’t you?”** _

Unknown: “And he speaks too”

_**“Where the hell am I?”** _

“All in good time. Now…  I need you to be a good boy and call him?”

**_“Who’s him?”_ **

Unknown: “Don’t play coy I know the Shadowstrike is your partner.”

" **I have no idea what you’re talking ab-”**

Unknown: “You seem to forget who we are. We have ways of making you talk Titan, and we intend to get the information we need. Eren will be ours.”

**_“Eren?”_ **

Unknown: “Now do that fucked up mind talk to your blond boy toy! Or should I use my toys instead?”

" _You are sick!”_

Unknown: “You say it like it's a bad thing. Lieutenant! Get the drill.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Jean (Italic Bold)  
> 'Unknown' (Underline)


	14. Lesson Number One...

Straightaway he pulled his hood over his head and unsheathed his two swords. He had used his sheaths to hold his BA weapons earlier today, like he knew he would have to quickly use them, like he predicted their needs. He swiftly rolled to the side of a nearby brick wall which was once part of a fully developed house. Now it was just a piece of rubble, with wooden supporters sticking out of where the wall used to be. The night sky was littered with smoke, ash and flames. All around us, the simple brick and straw houses were either alight or demolished.

 

I could imagine the quaintness of the little town, how the residents probably had no idea of what was to come as they went about their normal day-to-day routine. I pictured small children playing hopscotch in front of their houses as they waited for their supper to be ready. I pictured the baker coming out of his shop every morning to greet the vicinity with waft of freshly-cooked bread. Then I pictured them screaming and running for cover as what ever evil comes and turns this vulnerable town into a battlefield.

 

As Armin peered behind the wall of debris he placed his mask over his face. Through the shadowed hood I could see his iridescent violet iris’ flashing through his blue indicating his stress. Or was it fear perhaps? Either way it meant I was in a dangerous part of the sea with an immense lack of knowledge of which direction to take to get myself to shore. My katana acting as my paddle, I quickly scurried by the wall where my compass was holding his blades by his head.

 

He slowly moved his hand under his hood and pulled out his storage modulator. Within a few moments, a black hood and mask, much like the one he was wearing appeared in his hands. He silently chucked it over to me, ordering me to put it on.

“If they can’t see your face, they can’t tell who’s who. They may not risk trying to catch me.” May? I didn’t like the hesitance in his words. The tone suggesting his uneasiness and lack of confidence. A mass thumping was erupting in my chest. Though I couldn’t hear the beat over the flickering of the flames and the occasional falling of house debris onto the gravelled ground, I could still feel my chest constricting with each pump of heavy blood through my veins.

 

Armin could hear it though. He twitched with each pulse. It wouldn’t have surprised me if he could hear it. Before we could make our move, he had to make sure I was calm.

“Remember what I taught you Eren. Fear is healthy. You need to utilise that fear and use it to keep you alive. I’m not a superhero, I can’t tell you what may happen. But you need to promise me that you will not panic and that if I tell you to run, you will get as far away from here as possible.” A sudden heat stung my chest. The same burn from what I presumed was Armin’s SOS signal to me.

 

I pulled the charm out from under the hood to see it’s white glow in my palm. Armin clenched my fingers around it, gesturing me to put it back.

“Do you know what that does?” I didn’t answer.

“It’s a distress signal. When you panic, the wings will go white and radiate heat. It’s imbued with Titan blood. When the wearer has a heightened sense of emotion, the necklace will send signals to the source of that Titan’s blood. When it’s taken off, I can also sense it. But the one thing this one has that others don’t is a Titan sensor. It can sense when Titan’s are near, instead of burning, it will go rigid cold unless you feel threatened by that Titan, then it will just go back to generating heat.” It explained so much. Why he was able to find Connie and I at Trost. Why he came rushing in to save us at the Plaza. Why he warned me never to take it off. I was so relieved I hadn’t taking it off before.

 

“Why are you telling me this now Armin?” I whispered. A crash of a destroyed roof caving in caused us to raise our voices a little.

“Because I don’t know what may be out there right now. I value people's lives over anything else. We may die in a year, in a week, or in the next ten minutes. We would never know. So I figure it best to speak what you want the other to hear before it’s too late.” I agreed with him completely, only I couldn't believe that I would have the courage or the willpower to do that for myself. I was never good at putting my mind to words. Actions were always my way of conveying how I felt. But that got Armin kidnapped so I didn’t think any use for it.

 

I slipped the hood over my head and the mask over my face. Readjusting the katana in my grasp, I proceeded to follow Armin’s every command as we stealthily maneuvered about the abandoned streets of Karanase. ‘Abandoned’ in the sense that I hoped that the children had left their supper to go cold and the baker to leave his bread to go dry so they could escape the fires that were constantly crackling through the night.

 

It was at a narrow alleyway where we came across our first victim. It was a woman. She couldn’t have been older thirty, with a child in it’s arms. They both had deep maroon holes in between their eyes with red metallic liquid dripping down to their beaten torsos. The scene was horrifying yet I couldn’t look away. They were innocent. Innocent like this town. Innocent bystanders in the middle of a brewing chaos and they weren’t the only ones. I followed the repulsive odour of rotting flesh out the alleyway while Armin was inspecting the murdered mother and child.

 

No words could comprehend what I found at the town square. I called Armin over to the brutal scene. The fountain was functioning in the middle of the square, a red tainted-liquid spilling out the sides of the monument, along with a homicide of bloodied bodies strewn around the square. Some were lying lifeless on the ground while others had been thrown on to roofs and spikes and were dangling on by only a few limbs. Men, women and children of different ages had been killed. Those that still had their heads attached to their bodies had dark rings around their eyes indicating that they had definitely put up a fight. There was no steam. These weren’t Titans. These were humans.

 

I forced myself to stay strong. I couldn’t panic at a time like this. But even Armin’s eyes had widened at the scene. _Trust, Patience, Adapt,_ I mentally repeated to myself. He placed his two swords back in the sheaths on his back and we walked through the mass murder to try and find any evidence to who or what could of cause this. I found myself continuously looking down, making sure I wasn’t stepping on any loose limbs or puddles of human flesh, organs and blood. The deeper we got into the town, the worse it got. The smell turned from rotting flesh into a bloodied human oven from the flames.

 

“These were the only other people who knew about the Titans. We depended on them for our survival.” Suddenly a loud cough came from behind us. Armin quickly turned around and sprinted at lightning speed to the source of the coughing. He kneeled down to the old man who was a coughing out a neon blue liquid. Armin went to touch it and instantly pulled back as that familiar sizzling noise came from his fingers, leaving a burn mark that went away after a few seconds. He started doing his latin incantation but the old man grabbed his arm, telling him to stop.

“It won’t work,” he wheezed out, “Garrison… regiment… ambushed… scaled… out of… nowhere…” He clenched his chest before raising his free hand to me, extending his index finger in my direction.

“They want… him…” Were his last words before his hands dropped and his eyes went a lifeless grey.

 

I could feel the panic starting to rise but I forced it down. Trust, Patience, Adapt. Control your fear. I was going to keep a level-head. Maybe that guy was just delusional. Maybe he thought I was someone else. I knew it was naive to think that way, but I couldn’t of been the cause of all this death and destruction. Armin’s dilated violet eyes told me otherwise. He grabbed my shoulders and pulled me to a clear bit of gravel where the bodies were limited to only a few on roofs, only splatters of red on the ground beneath us. He was only able to get my name out before he collapsed to the ground with an agonizing scream. Holding his hands over his ears like he was blocking out some demonic noise. I tried to ask him what was wrong but his pain seemed too great for him to register my words. Suddenly his eyes violently shot open to reveal his infernal glowing ones along with his pointed canines and a low growled voice yelling “Eren… Run.”

 

I wanted to do what he said but that same heavy anchor that came with Armin’s suffering had weighed me down again. He was now convulsing on the ground, lashing aggressively like a snake without it’s tail. I looked up from Armin for only a second when I saw we were surrounded by a group of thugs dressed in black with violet eyes. It was the Garrison Regiment. Control your fear, control your fear. Below me I could hear Armin whimpering. I stepped over Armin protectively and held my katana up in a defensive position, looking at each Titan as they closed in to us in synchronized steps. They had stopped only a few feet in front of us when Armin started an inaudible whisper of a name that I couldn’t recognize at first. After a few repeats the word sinked in. “Jean.”

 

The idea of controlling my fear was completely lost. I was surrounded by twenty-odd Titans and all I had to protect myself was one sword. Just as I was about to advance on the attack the sword evaporated from my grasp. My breathing became heavy. Beads of sweat of were dripping from my face. I looked down to see Armin had my BA in his hands and was putting it back into his Storage Modulator along with his own. The words trust me were mouthed from his lips, his fangs sticking out like a saber. He again started to convulse and scream under me.

 

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO HIM!” I yelled at the surrounding attackers.

“We aren’t doing anything. He’s done it to himself.”

“YOU LIAR.” A fist was met with my stomach, causing me to fall to my hands and knees in a violent coughing fit. The metallic taste of blood was filling my mouth. Someone from behind was slowly lifting my hood to reveal the top of my head. The Titan yanked my head back and pulled me to a standing position. My mask down as well to reveal my identity. They all looked pleased. An evil smirk covered most of their faces. Except one who came up right up to my face and clenched my cheeks in his hands, turning my head side to side to inspect it closer. I concluded to the possibility of him being their leader.

 

“What happened to his eyes?” The man holding my face asked.

“We don’t know sir,” a female voice behind me started, “but we do believe he is the cause of Reiner’s death. We also believe that this is the one the Doctor wants.” So these guys were with Reiner. And what was this about my eyes. Were they different?

“Take them both, the plan must have worked. The horse-face did his job well. We might need to do something about those eyes of his as well. They could cause a massive problem for the doctor.” The man who was holding me asked.

“But sir? I thought he was supposed to have it? If we changed him, then couldn’t that-” The women holding me was interrupted by a gunshot to the head. Another Titan immediately took the questioner’s place and grabbing my hair and holding a needle to my neck.

 

“Don’t. Wait till we get to the base. Just sedate him for now.” The leader called out. They needed two people to lift the weakened Armin from the ground. I struggled to break free but was stopped by a knee to my tailbone. The man still had my hair as I collapsed on my knees, sending a shooting pain up my spine. The pain was released when a different syringe punctured my neck. The last thing I remembered a blinding white light and a high-pitched wail.

 

\---

 

I struggled to lift my eyelids open. It wasn’t that it was too bright, in fact it was the opposite, almost pitch black. It was that I felt so drained like all my energy had been taken from me. It took me a while to recollect where I was and how got here. When my eyes adjusted to the dark, I noticed a rope was tied around my ankles. I had my knees tucked towards me and when I tried to move forward a massive weight pulled me back. Attempting to turn around was pointless as my hands were tied together, along with another’s with the same rope.

 

In the corner of my eyes, I saw a mass of blond hair with magenta streaks. I whispered his name to see if he was awake. His head slowly came up and turned towards me. His eyes were bloodshot with dark rings.

“Glad to see you’re awake.” He croaked. What happened? One minute he was helping that old man and the next he’s falling to the ground in a fit of agony. That couldn’t of been normal. Not even for a Titan. I asked if he knew where we were but he hadn’t a clue.

 

The ground was stone cold. Loose bits of gravel were surrounding my feet that echoed as I kicked at them out of nervous boredom. Now that my eyes had adjusted I could see we were surrounded by a clay brick mound. I couldn’t see a door, a gate or even a window. There was no way in and no way out. Panic started to kick at my stomach like a trapped animal attempts to escape confinement, tearing and clawing away at the edges until a small hole appears. That hole for me was fear. The panic was eaten away at my sense of fear until I had no idea what I was afraid of anymore. I was just plain scared. _Trust, Patience, Adapt. Control your fear._

 

I could feel the burn on my chest again. I had to bend over so that it wouldn’t leave a scar on my chest.

“You need to calm down Eren.” Armin said in between puffs for air. Why was he so breathless?

“It hurts… remember… how I said it connects… my body is under too much stress to take it… please try and calm down…” Memories of Connie and Mikasa trying to soothe me when I would have panic attacks came into mind. I repeated in my head the numbers one through to ten and then back again, breathing in and out at a steady pace until my heart had come to more suitable rate and the charm’s light became dim. Armin let out a loud breath.

 

“Thankyou, Eren. Give me a second to hear where everyone is.” I remained quiet so Armin could listen. So my assumptions must have been right about his heightened sense of hearing. After a few seconds of silence Armin informed me that there weren’t any Titans in the room we were in but there were still some who were in adjoining rooms who were close enough to hear any loud sudden noises.

 

“So how do we get out of here?”

“We wait.”

“For what?”

“An opportune moment, think of it as another test.” Well that seemed convincing. Not. We were surrounded by Titans. If we were to try and escape, there was the risk of Armin collapsing again and I proved enough that I definitely wasn’t ready to take on those Titans.

 

“Armin, what happened? Why’d you fall?” I had to repeat the question again as he didn’t respond. He seemed to be lost in thought, perhaps for how we would escape.

“You remember Jean right.” I nodded, recalling the ash haired boy from that dream as well as his two daggers sliding across Reiner neck to behead him. I then responded with a yes remembering we were back to back and he couldn’t see my gesture.

 

“There’s a ritual that some Titans go through. It’s called Blood-bonding. Only the elite do it as it is very dangerous and lots of Titans end up dying in the process.”

“So why do it?” I asked.

“It makes you ten times as strong. The two Titans that do the ritual end up becoming connected, much like you and me with the necklace, but this is a lot stronger. It does come with a price though…” He trailed off. I nudged him back to reality and he continued.

“Although you do become ten times stronger physically, your souls are basically connected, if you believe in that sort of thing.” After the past few weeks I would believe him if he said unicorns and shinigamis were real.

 

“We can go into each other’s minds, look through their eyes, even have silent mind conversations. It comes in really handy when in combat. But we also feel each other’s pain. When one of us has a heightened emotion we are forced into the other’s mind. If they are in a great amount of pain, the other will feel it as well to halve the pain. Usually you are able to choose to halve it or keep it all for yourself, but sometimes, the pain is forced out of the original receiver and is multiplied onto the partner.”

“Is that what happened to you?” His lack of an answer clarified that it was. Armin could feel when Jean was looking through his eyes and ever since he left he hadn't checked up on him which was unusual. According to him, they always checked up on each other every so often to make sure they were okay. Armin continued to do it while he had been with me, but Jean never did and his fall gave him a fair idea of why.

 

“Were you able to see where he was?”

“No, he was blindfolded. But I could tell he was tied up and that he was being violently interrogated. I can’t remember much, it was all a blur after I turned. I mean, you know the eyes,” He went to point to his eyes but then remembered we both had our hands tied together behind our backs. “but I do remember the sound of a drill and the man in front of him talking about his different… tools.” He squeaked out the last word. From what I understood about this blood-bond, he could feel everything Jean was feeling. If he was being tortured with these ‘tools’ then it would of been so traumatic for him. Yet Armin continued to remain level-headed. He still seemed quite upset and I couldn’t blame him. If I knew he was being tortured and I could feel the pain he was going through I wouldn’t be half as stable as him. Armin must have gone through some form of beyond hellish experience to be this controlled.

 

\---

 

I didn’t know silence could be so deafening. The constant ringing in my ears was driving me to the point of insanity. My blood was boiling from impatience. I was constantly fidgeting trying to get the ropes off of my ankles and wrists while Armin sat still as a statue. If I could of seen his face, I would guarantee he would not have been blinking.

 

Armin sad this was a test of patience. I was not a patient person. At least when it came to counting down my inevitable death. It didn’t matter how many times I repeated those three words in my head - _Trust, Patience, Adapt_ \- my anxious fidgeting wouldn’t cease. The panic was gone but fear was definitely still there setting my adrenalin on fire. The clay bricks became my point of distraction. I managed to count hundred ninety-two bricks just on the wall in front of me. Twelve bricks up, sixteen across. I was up to fifty-four bricks on the roof when a ear-piercing shriek echoed outside the walls. A large strength pulled the ropes at my hands apart letting out a large rip. That same ripping of the ropes again at Armin’s feet. He stood up quickly and pulled the ropes apart at my feet as well. He tore them apart like paper, it made me wonder why he hadn’t done it before.

 

“What was that?” I asked as Armin brought out his Storage Modulator to grab his BA and hand me back mine. I fumbled as he threw it in my direction.

“It’s time for you to meet a few more of us. Our opportune moment has arrived” He called out. He placed the BA on his belt and brought out his dual katanas. I did the same bringing out my two-handed one. The shriek sounded again, creating a large cunning smile on Armin’s face. His eyes were still blue, which meant he must have known this was coming. After pondering the sound again, I realised I had heard it before. Just before I was knocked out. But what was it?

 

Armin placed his ear against the wall next to brick seventy-two. I could hear the soft sound of a woman grunting on the other side along with a the thumps and groans of other Titan guards falling to the ground.

“You may want to step back.” Armin stated, gesturing me to move back to the side. Armin tapped twice on the brick his ear was just against. No more than three loud claps of body against brick was all it took for the wall to come crashing down in a dusty cloud of old clay. When the dust settled, a tall brunette in a short ponytail come walking in with a dark steel bo staff in hand. She had a cut over her eye that was bleeding rapidly. It went away within seconds leaving a red stain down the side of her cheek. When her eyes opened her irises were a fluorescent violet.

“Armin, you’re a fucking idiot.” She said as she pulled him into a hug.

“It’s good to see you too Ymir.”

 

\---

 

   “Looks like it worked. You’re little Shadowstrike is now ours.”

_**“What are you doing to him?”** _

   “Like we would tell you that.”

_**“Tell me or I’ll -”** _

   “Or you’ll what hm? You can’t use any of your Titan abilities while we have you hooked up to this bad boy.”

**_“Why are you doing this?”_ **

   “I don’t make the rules horsey-boy, I’m simply just doing my job”

_**"Then who has employed you?”** _

   “I’m sure you can guess that for yourself? His symbol is on your back for God’s sake.”

_**"The Doctor…”** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Jean (Italic Bold)  
> Unknown (Normal)


	15. No Longer the Prey

The girl who I heard Armin address as Ymir, was first to pull out of the embrace, striking Armin directly across the face as soon as their eyes locked. Armin rubbed the red hand mark that was left by the girl with a pout. She stood tall, making sure to show no signs of fatigue. She pulled the bo up horizontally across her body, putting one hand on the end and pushing it in so that it decreased about six times its original size. Where on earth does one find a retractable steel bo staff like that?

 

She looked pissed. R _eally_ pissed. Like she had gone through all sorts of hell searching for Armin to find that he was here the whole time and seemed perfectly fine. Only, we were far from fine. Ymir proceeded to tell us that although she had attempted a stealth approach, but was shortly spotted and had alerted the whole facility of her presence.

 

“How many are there?” Armin enquired.

“Hard to say,” Her stern voice lowered into a whisper. “But I was able to take out eight before I got here, I would say there are over hundred throughout…” She explained the urgency in greater detailed but the only words that my mind could grasp were hundreds. As in hundreds of those violet eyed monsters who were guarding just me and Armin. Just how important were we? No. I shouldn’t of been thinking like that. There could be hundreds, even thousands of captives in this place. It seemed pretty large, the factor was definitely a possibility.

 

“Did you see anyone else as you came in?” I hesitantly asked, not wanting to intrude on something that I knew they had far greater knowledge of. The furrowed eyebrows and the annoyed scowl that was handed to me by her as a result of my question, proved that I should've just kept my mouth shut.

“Who’s the suicidal freak over here?”

“Ymir, this is Eren?” Armin answered confused. Ymir shook her head in disbelief. Her eyes widened from shock as she attempted to process what she had just heard. Ymir grabbed Armin’s collar and pulled him towards her with such force that it caused Armin to let out a slight yelp. Thier tone was barely audible over the stampeding footsteps that had erupted outside the Ymir’s grand entrance to the room. They whispered on the other side of the room, occasionally sending glances in my direction like I wasn’t even there. The one thing I did pick up on was the word ‘eyes’. Or it could of been ‘lies’ or even ‘rise’, it was too hard to tell.

 

Outside the destroyed hole in the wall, the tap-tap echo of running soldiers on stones was coming closer. Armin and Ymir’s conversation grew from a quiet whisper to a loud argument very quickly. As the voices grew stronger so did the footsteps.

“Armin for godsake, put yourself in my shoes for a second. How do you think this looks!?” Ymir cried out. I tried to get their attention but their yelling didn’t stop.

“What more do you want me to say? That. Is. Eren. End of story.”

“Uh… Guys… I think there's someon-”

“NOT NOW!” They both screamed in synchronization.

 

I could practically feel the soldiers on top of us. My breathing started to hitch and I found myself involuntarily backing away from the hole in the wall. I brushed my hand over my BA and brought out my katana. It trembled in my grasp as I held the artificial blade defensively in front of my body. Fatigue was ignored from the panic that I was trying so hard to channel into fear and adrenalin.

 

“Those eyes are not the ones of a-”

“I know Ymir! It’s because he’s not!” Ymir gasped. They both shot their eyes towards me. Armin’s was filled with sympathy, Ymir’s still coated in astonishment. I probably looked like a pathetic mouse that had just been herded into a corner by a ravaging kitten awaiting it’s next meal. My knees were uncontrollably shaking as was my grip on the sword, not to mention that it felt like every muscle in my body was having a seizure and the hairs on my arms were standing on end against my damp, grime covered clothing. That pride of cats were only seconds away from clawing itself into my mouse hole.

“THEY’RE IN HERE!” I heard a strong voice sound from beyond the wall, followed by other men yelling to follow.

 

Everything went in slow motion. The violet-eyed man in black emerging into the room. Ymir expanding her retractable bo staff with a flick and running towards the man. Armin reaching into his belt and pulling out two shurikens. Then it went fast. The metal star-shaped blades were thrown with acute precision into both of the man’s eyes. He cried out and brought his hands up to his face from the impact, allowing Ymir to swing the end of her bo directly across the man’s ribs sending him crashing back where he came from, knocking over two more Titans in the process.

 

Ymir crushed the two Titans skulls that fell under the other man with the end of her bo into the ground before disappearing down the dimly lit hallway that had appeared behind the wall. Armin went to follow but stopped when he realised I was still glued to the spot in panic.

“Trust us, Eren.” He grabbed the tattered ends of my shirtsleeve and tugged slightly, breaking me out of my trance. We leapt over the evaporating steaming bodies and headed in the same direction as the brunette.

 

\---

 

The halls were much like the inside of the cell. Old clay brick, with wax candles offering as a source of lighting. That didn’t really help though as Ymir had been going so damn fast that the candles blew out as she passed them. Armin used this as a way of tracking her. As we continued on her tail, Armin pulled out his dual-wielding swords. It was only now, running so close behind him, that I could distinguish little details that I hadn’t seen before. The hilt of both his swords were wrapped in a beige leather. The blade curved only slightly as it came to the end, allowing for a clean finishing strike when needed. Then at the very ends of the handle were little purple, black and white tassels that hit against each other as Armin sprinted through the dark, dusty halls.

 

I felt it was selfish to bring personal matters into this sprint for my survival but I could not get the question out of my head, _What was so god damn important about my eyes?_ I didn’t have time to ponder about it though as a Titan yelled from down the hallway and dropped down in front of Armin, another following shortly behind. I went to run the opposite direction but two more Titans were closing in on us. We were trapped. I continued to step back with my blade positioned up guarding my body and head until I bumped into Armin who was already in his fighting stance, blades positioned accordingly behind me.

 

I sneaked a side glance at him whose eyes had become violet, which I had now decided to call his defensive eyes. My necklace was burning with the state of panic I was in. I had only been under Armin’s training for a week and I hadn’t had any time to try out my abilities in a realistic situation. I could’ve very well been killed within those next few minutes.

 

“Eren, calm down. Don’t let panic control you. You are the only one who can decide whether you walk out of here alive.” He spoke as the Titans closed in on us. I attempted to control my breathing, taking in the musty humid air in through my nose and out through my mouth. My eyes never left the two Titans in front of me, and for the first time in a long time I felt confident.

 

**_“Hey Ar? We will do this. We will become the best ninja assassins to ever walk the planet. No one will ever dream of picking on us.”_ **

****

**_“Hell yeah we will.”_ **

 

That same adrenaline I felt back then, that same power filled me from head to toe. I forgot how good it felt, how it felt to be in control of your body. It was like someone had deprived me of the most addictive drug on the planet for years and it was only now that the euphoria of it all eased me to the point of ecstasy. Armin caught this sense of elation and chuckled.

 _Let’s see if your training’s paid off Jaeger_ , I heard Armin’s voice speak in my head. I couldn’t tell if it was my imagination or if it was really him speaking to me through my mind. It didn’t matter. I was going to show him that the past week of tireless mental and physical training was worth it.

 

I waited for one of the Titans to make the initial advance. I didn’t plan his moves like I usually did but I kept in mind all the possibilities he could go with so that I could adapt to anything he would throw at me. If I was correct by the way the hallways were fixed and the loose way the Titans held the swords in their hands, the first strike would probably be either to my neck or stomach. He was tall so it would be a waste of energy to go for my legs but at the same time he could easily sweep them under me if I didn’t watch my footing.

 

Just as I had expected, his first strike was to my neck. I ducked and blocked the strike from under him, immediately executing a reverse sweep with my heel to the pressure point behind his knees. He fell back onto his head over my feet as I made a three-sixty turn back to a stand. The second Titan shortly came running, sword above her head as she jumped over the collapsed man. _Perfect,_ I thought. Her body was fully exposed. At just the right moment I turned and delivered a back kick right into the woman’s sternum. It hit her square on, but my footing and stance was off-balanced. The impact of her weight on my leg sent me backwards colliding to the floor.

 

The male Titan took the opportunity to crawl over to his own sword which he was disarmed of and came towards me. I found that I also had dropped my sword from the fall, seeing it only a foot away from my reach. I got on my elbows and frantically started slithering towards it on the ground. A strong force on my leg pulled me back just as the tips of my fingers fumbled with the hilt. The male had his sword in his mouth as he tugged me towards him, chuckling menacingly as he did. I used the tugging force to my advantage as I brought my leg up and kicked vertically at his jaw with a grunt. He dropped the sword from his mouth and his grasp was released from me.

 

I made a runner towards my own blade but was again stopped by a massive weight falling on top of me. Bringing my arm that wasn’t trapped by the Titans weight across my body, I punctured my elbow into his philtrum, making him curse from the pain. The katana was so close I could feel the steel hilt brush the tips of my fingers. Before I could get a better grip though, the Titan had me straddled under him. In the chaos of it all, he somehow managed to get ahold of his own sword and again in between his teeth. I kept struggling for my own katana, but he knocked it away as soon as he realised what I was trying to do. He brought one of his muscular hands to my throat, another to the blade in his mouth. My hands instinctively went to my throat which was slowly being collapsed under his pressure.

 

My stomach clenched and my lungs begged for air but nothing was getting in or out. My vision was blurring and my mind was going fuzzy. His Titan eyes were glowing the fluorescent possessed violet, the same uncontrolled-full magenta hue that Armin had just before he collapsed, the demon-Titan eyes. His canines were pointed like fangs as he hissed at me through the darkness, bringing the point of his blade directly over my chest.

 

If I had been in this situation a week ago, I would of accepted defeat. I would have given up at the sight of ropes around my ankles and wrists. Or even when I saw the mangled bodies around Karanase. But something was keeping me going. I didn’t know what it was, but I sure as hell didn’t want it to go away. I was no longer the prey. I was the hunter, and I was going to win. With all the strength I had still left in me, I forced open my eyes, quickly rolling my hips to the side, flicking the Titan off my body. Before he even realised what had happened, I had taken hold of my katana again and was puncturing it straight through his heart from behind.

 

As I attempted to retrieve my blade that was fixated into his back, a female scream came from behind me. At first I thought it was that brunette with the bo but when I turned around, the Titan that I had back-kicked was running towards me, sword swinging wildly around her. I tried to take my blade out but it was stuck. I tightened the grip on the hilt and put my foot on the steaming Titan’s limp back to pull the sword out, but before I could get it out, it disappeared. I had no weapon. The female Titan was slashing frantically at me yelling “YOU KILLED HIM!” over and over. I jumped out of the way before any of her lazy slashes could make contact with me but she was still pursuing me.

 

I wasn’t paying attention to my surroundings and tripped over a steaming Titan that I assumed Armin had killed. Her eyes were also in that demon-Titan glowing mode but she had tears coming down her face. She’s let her emotions take over. I honestly thought she was going to take my life right there and then and there was nothing I could do to defend myself. She had backed me up against the wall and had the point of her sword at my neck.

“An eye for an eye.” She hissed through her drowning face. She brought her sword across her body ready to take my head clean off. I turned my head, clenching my eyes closed and cowered beneath her pathetically. When I opened my eyes again, a blue liquid was flowing down her neck, creating a fluorescent blue neck-tie down her body  accompanied with a gurgling, choking noise. Her head came tumbling down to the floor, falling completely off her body down into a heaping mess of evaporating Titans on the ground. Her knees fell first, giving way to a blood-covered brunette holding a bo in one hand and a short neon blue-coated dagger in the other, heavily panting.

 

She finally made eye contact with me and scoffed at my vulnerable position on the ground. I quickly hoisted myself up from the wall and flinched at the pain that was ensuing in my shoulder that had been crushed. As I maneuvered my arm to get some of the blood flowing again and ease the bruising, Ymir held out the blue-coated dagger towards me. I stared at the shining substance on the metal before raising my eyes to her quizzically.

“You did well, for a Vulgaris that is.” She said as she handed the blade towards me, emphasising her displeasement at the foreign word.

“Eren!” Armin called from behind her. He too was also covered in the steaming blood of the Titans. He wiped the dripping excess from his brow, looking oddly relieved that I had not taken more damage. Ymir called for us to go, me and Armin both nodded at each other and followed suit.

 

“What’s a Vul- Vulga-”

“Vulgaris?” Armin finished as we continued to follow Ymir from behind.

“Yea that?”

“It what we call people who are normal, who aren’t Titans” Well that seemed fair I guess. _It’s not like they could call us humans or anything_. Armin sensed my annoyance at the word. Damn him and his intellect, he could always see through me,

“We don’t like to refer to them as humans because then that is inadvertently differing us from our birth right as humans. Our humanity is the only thing we have left. If we don’t have that, we really are monsters.” He was rudely interrupted by Ymir who yelled at us to “quit our chit-chat before she ties our throats to a taser and hangs us over a cliff by our tongues.” We immediately shut up. I gave him a look to say I was sorry. Sorry for everything. Sorry for not taking his mental training more seriously. Sorry for thinking he was no longer human because of his new title. Sorry for not trusting him. He had faith that I would survive and I did. I trusted that he had faith that I would win and I did. _Trust, Patience, Adapt_. I kept thinking. _Trust, Patience, Adapt..._

 

\---

 

We had only a few more singular encounters with Titans till we came to two large silver doors at the end of what felt like a never-ending hallway. It was strange. It completely juxtaposed to everything I had seen in this place so far. What had originally looked like it was built in the seventeen hundreds now jumped over five centuries forward as we peered through the glass windows on the electronic steel doors. It had a sensor panel on the side for one to place their hand to make the door unlock. I looked at the two Titans in front of me expecting them to be baffled at our dead end and yet they looked calm, almost sinister.

 

“Ymir, call her.” Armin commanded. Ymir nodded and closed her eyes in concentration. When they opened they were in full magenta glow, still dimmer than the demon-Titan glow though. It was the dim glow they had when they were focused on something. After a few short seconds her eyes extinguished back to normal. Her violet irises were now a hazel brown, much like the ash-haired Titan that had saved me before. If she removed the constant scowl on her face, she may have been an attractive girl. That familiar ear-piercing screech echoed moments later from behind the door making me clutch my ears.

 

For some reason, that screech had made a smile finally cover the girl's face as well as her eyebrows which were no longer furrowed. She looked happy, like any other teenage girl would. It was an odd sight to see on her, despite only just meeting her. The decibel of the screech had shattered the glass windows to the floor. Maybe there was an air pressure system, maybe someone had set it off, we would never know, but whatever Ymir ‘called’ worked. The steel doors system shut down and clicked, slowly sliding open to reveal a blinding white light. I squinted and raised an arm to block the fluorescent beams as the three of us walked into the room.

 

The walls were pure white, with machine and assortment of tools and devices that I could never name even if I was left in there for years. The only thing that looked out of place of this laboratory looking facility, was a small crouched figure sitting on a cleared bench top. Looking closer, I noticed that it was girl. She was clutching her pale knees to her chest, and her chin was resting on her crossed arms that rested on her knees. She had long blond hair that flowed down her back like it was honey dripping from a hive in the middle of the Garden of Eden. Placed on her luscious blond strands was a thick circlet headband made of metal plate, with silver wings on the both sides, just above her ears. Though I couldn’t see her face, I couldn’t take my eyes of her, she was mesmerising.

 

When she heard us walk in the door, her head slowly emerged from her crouched position and turned towards us. It was even harder to look away now that I saw her eyes. They unmistakably matched Armin’s almost to the exact hue. The smile she gave lit up the whole room, making her bright blue eyes twinkle. My jaw had dropped at the beauty of this girl.

“Ymir! Armin!” She cried out. She jumped down from the bench and ran to hug Ymir who made the cheesiest smile I had even seen plastered on a teenagers face. When they pulled out of the embrace I noticed the limited clothing the shorter girl was wearing.

 

I hadn’t seen before but the only clothing she had on was an iron bralette that had a gold chain going up around her neck to keep the breastplate from falling down with a matching metal war skirt and white flowing garments that tied around her waist flowing just past her knees to protect the more sensitive areas. I forced myself to look away, my cheeks blushing a full red as I did, but not before I noticed the metal sabatons on her feet that came up to her knees. She had what resembled metal vines that curled at the tips of her fingers snaking up to her iron spaulders that were shaped like the wings on her headpiece. It was an understatement to say that she reminded me of the norse goddess of light.

 

She ran up to Armin next, practically toppling him over as she smashed her small body into him. I could hear sniffles coming from the girl, she quickly wiped the tears that fell when Armin pulled her away. That was when I saw them. How on earth did I miss them before? I stumbled back astonished at the sight before me. I thought I had seen everything, but nothing could of prepared me for this. She saw my fear and walked up to me slowly, concern washing over her face.

 

“You must be the Vulgaris Armin told me about. It’s nice to meet you Eren, I’m Krista.” She held out her hand but the only thing that I could see were the two massive extra joints on her back. Attached to the girls back was mass of soft white feathers that had blended into the surroundings so perfectly that I had not seen them before. Maybe I didn’t really survive that fight. Maybe that woman really did cut my head off. Because what I was seeing right now was nothing short of an angel with a pure glowing aura. This petite blond girl had wings.

 

\---

 

_Rivaille, Sir! Are you sure, you don’t want Hitch and myself to go look for them?_

**No. We have enough of our Survey Corps on the outside as it is. We don’t need anymore casualties.**

_Understood._

**Annie...**

_Yes Sir?_

**Could you check with Hanji to pin-point the whereabouts of the three? It’s not that I don’t trust them, but Karanase is dangerous and I haven’t heard from any of the residents in ages. I’m starting to wonder if something has happened.**

_Yes Sir. I will go to her immediately._

**Armin Arlert, what on earth have you gotten yourself into?**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Annie (Italic)  
> Rivaille (Bold)


	16. New Allies

My ears were still ringing from impact of my head on the solid benches behind me. The repeated buzzing drumming my head. Shock from her had caused me to fall backwards and hit the back of my head on the concrete benchtop. Purple eyes were one thing, wings, was under a whole different category. The overwhelming feeling of dizziness and nausea suddenly overcame me and it took everything inside me to not throw up (again) on this literal blond angel in front of me.

“Why didn’t you tell me he had a concussion?” The girl who addressed herself as Krista asked. Ymir shrugged.

“We were in too much of a hurry to notice.” Krista looked worried. I tried to tell her I was fine but she insisted she help. She hoisted me with little to no effort on to the bench behind me and placed both of her hands on my head, fingertips massaging my temples. For a small girl, she definitely was strong.

 

“Now don’t move.” She calmly said as her beach blue eyes began to go violet, eventually growing into the Titan concentrated glow. Her eyes didn’t glow magenta like Ymir and Armin’s did, her’s glowed white. White like the velvet wings that dragged along the ground behind her.

“Krista, there’s no time.” Ymir stated. Krista didn’t stop though. The familiar relieving sensation washed over me like a pure cleansing water. The same feeling I got when Armin healed me. In no less than ten seconds did I feel completely rejuvenated and fresh and Krista’s eyes were back to normal.

 

I thanked her and stepped down from the bench, unable to take my eyes off the bundle of white feathers attached to her back. Krista caught me staring and turned to Armin, allowing me a closer look at the masterpiece. As they brushed my hand, the warmth lingered. It was like petting a baby bird, the feathers so soft you could barely feel they were there, the only proof, being the body-heat that came from them. The wings weren’t an attachment, they were a part of her.

 

“I’m guessing this is new to him?” Armin nodded as Krista subtly flapped her subject matter of the question, flicking my hair across my face with the subtle air flow. That’s when I realised, my hair wasn’t matted anymore. Looking down at my body and running a hand through my hair and down my face, I was completely clean, not a speck of blood, bruises, cuts, stains, nothing. No wonder I felt clean and fresh.

 

“How do we get out of here?” Armin asked. Krista shook her head like she had just remembered the dire situation we were in. She ran her hand over a BA that she had attached to the belt that held her skirt up to just below her navel that I hadn’t seen before. After she did so a quiver appeared around her waist loaded with what seemed like an unlimited amount of broadhead arrows and a wooden longbow. She ran to an adjoining door in the room, arrow loaded in the bow.

 

“We took out most of the guys when we got Ymir in here,” she said. “But that was over an hour ago, I expect there would be more Titans out there. Be ready for anything.” We all nodded and brought our weapons up. Ymir went to the side of the door with her hand on the handle ready to open it when Armin gave the call. He had his two swords pressed by his sides next to Krista. Both their gazes peered just at the doors edge, both with the same deadly look on their face that showed they were ready to kill. They might as well be twins they were so identical. As if they had rehearsed this time and time and again, all three of the Titan’s eyes changed to their defensive purple.

 

I quickly tapped on my BA to see if my Katana had repaired itself yet. Luckily it had. I pulled it out and moved next to Armin with the sword resting by my side. Armin closed his eyes and rested his ear against the wall.

“There’s about twenty in there right now, I think only a two or three are armed.” He shortly said after removing his ear from the white walls, leaving a dirt patch where his head rested.

“What’s our strategy then?” Ymir asked. Armin pondered for a bit before answering.

“Go code Delta,” Krista and Ymir both acknowledged their understanding, while I stood there thinking _Code what now?_

“Eren, I want you to watch Krista’s back at all times. She’s going to be shooting above us and may not see incoming projectiles. Take extreme caution and call out to her if you see a gunman aiming at her.” Was he really doing this? Was he really putting her life in my hands? Surely she should of been against putting faith in someone she had only just met but she just nodded as if it was no big deal. I stuttered as I tried to explain that I couldn’t possibly do it.

 

“You’ll do fine Eren. I know you can do this.” Armin gently said.

“Armin’s right,” We all turned towards the winged girl. “I have faith in you. If Armin believes you can do it, then I will follow his judgement.” I was bewildered. Who puts blind faith in a person they just met? There was nothing I could do it about it now. I just had to bite the bullet and focus on the task at hand.

“Okay, I will do it.” I confirmed after a long pause.

 

After Armin gave me a nod of appreciation we all looked towards Ymir who still had the doorknob in her hand ready to open when Armin gave the signal. After a minute of unsettling silence a loud ‘NOW’ was yelled by Armin and the door was burst open. Ymir left in a blur as she didn’t even use the handle she was holding and completely broke down the door, moving out it faster than the speed light if that was even possible. Krista went through first, her elegant white wings expanding as she crouched and pushed with her knees off the ground and ascended into the air.

 

Simultaneously, me and Armin sprinted into the room with our blades drawn, yelling as we advanced towards the horde of violet-eyed terrors in front of us. The room was massive, reminding me of an abandoned warehouse. It was still white like the inside of the room but it had a grey-tinge from the lack of natural lighting. LED Lights hung from the ceiling. Steel staircases spiraled up leading to a balcony where I could see Ymir dealing a killing blow to her attacker, the victim being thrown over the edge once she was satisfied.

 

Armin was a lot faster than me and got to the heap of enemies before I did. One after the other, his blades took them down. I engaged into a one on one battle with a Titan that was about my own height when I had arrived. Swords clashed as we both tried to make the winning move against the other. I pushed forward with slim edge of the sword to deliver a strike to his neck. Unfortunately he had the same idea. Our blades collided and we engaged in a staring match to see who would let go first. Remembering the fight I had with Armin while training, I let go first, sending him flying forward past me. When I turned to give the final blow a blur had already crushed his skull in. When the image had settled, Ymir stood over the steaming body.

“GO HELP KRISTA!” She yelled before once again disappearing in a flash, Titan’s falling to the ground where the blur passed.

 

I looked up to see where the winged Titan was but I couldn’t see her. You would think that a person with wings would be easy to find but it was like she had gone invisible. The only way I was able to find her location was through her call. That ear-piercing screech I kept hearing, it belonged to her. The screech made the Titans, excluding Armin and Ymir clutch their hands in pain, giving her the perfect opportunity to aim an arrow at their necks and shoot. She never missed a shot.

 

\---

 

I took refuge behind a barricade that Ymir pointed out for me to stay where I wouldn’t be seen as I called out to Krista when I saw a sniper from affair or go back to after I took out a Titan silently from behind. Now that I was standing back from the rucuss to I could witness for the first time, the teamwork and harmonisation that the three Titans attacked in. Armin and Ymir constantly had each other’s backs and would use each other’s different strengths to adapt to their situation. Krista acted as their guardian angel, constantly keeping watch over the two from above, shooting at anyone who was entering at their blind spot.

 

At one point Armin and Ymir were surrounded by the remaining ten or so Titans. Krista was hovering above them, with only one arrow left in her quiver and one already placed on the bow. I was still sneaking around through the shadows, stealth attacking Titans from behind and alerting Krista when needed. His strategy had worked up until this point. Armin and Ymir had their backs pressed together, both holding their Titan-blood stained weapons in their defensive position. Krista also had her bow drawn back, the drawstring resting in the little dent at the side of her lips as she stared down the tip of her arrow.

 

The three continued to circle around until Armin’s eyes locked with mine. I went to jump out of the space where I was hiding but his voice in my head interrupted yelling, _No, Eren stay there, we’re okay._ Placing my trust in him I crouched back to my hiding spot in the shadow of the spiral staircase. This showdown continued until one of the enemy Titans got fed up and advanced towards the three. As soon as his foot stepped out of the synchronized circle, Armin voice called out, “INITIATE CODE DELTA!”

 

All the Titans advanced towards them now but slowed down when Krista hovered higher, batting her wings in a long-wide motion, sending a strong gust of wind their way, crying out her shriek as she did. She then swooped down, her wingspan fully extended and hoisted Ymir up in to the air, leaving Armin in the middle. I had to cover my face from the strength of Krista’s gust that had finally reached over to me. When I put down my hand I noticed that Armin had placed both his swords back in their sheaths on his back.

 

He had his arms crossed over his chest and was mumbling something that was too silent for me to hear over the battle. His mumbling gradually got louder until he made one final shout in what I could now recognise as Latin and slammed his fist into the ground. _“ELEMENTA COMMODA MIHI VIRES”_ It was like an earthquake was built up in his fists and he had just released into the ground. The earth shook beneath our feet, the hard ground splitting in a zig-zagged half. When you followed the crack it led straight back to Armin who’s eyes were demonised.

 

Krista threw Ymir up in the air who had her bo twirling like helicopter blades in her fingertips. As Ymir descended down she threw the spinning staff at a group of Titans who had lost their balance from the quake. The bo acted as a spinning top, toppling everything in it’s path. Titan’s were smacked against the wall to the point of death as soon as contact was made with the bo.

 

When all the Titans in the vicinity of the bo had been taking care of Krista sent a gust of wind towards the bo to Ymir who took it in her hand and continued to fight. Armin began fighting in hand to hand combat alongside Krista. He would beat the living daylights out of the Titans and then chuck them up to Krista who would deliver swift aerial kicks in the air to them, either collapsing their lungs, breaking their back or snapping their neck depending on the point of impact.

 

When they were down to the remaining two, all three banded together. Krista hoisted Ymir in one hand, Armin in the other up into the air. Krista spun around, making three 360 degree turns before throwing Ymir towards the two who hit them up into the air towards Armin who was then thrown vertically up so he could come down on both, with an axe kick to the back of one’s neck, Krista grabbing the other and throwing him against a wall.

 

The three successful Titans all landed silently onto the ground, panting for air. I emerged from my hiding spot feeling very ashamed and self conscious. They were amazing together. It made me feel like a dead weight. Ymir and Krista’s eyes turned back to normal almost instantly but Armin was having trouble. He collapsed to the floor on his hands and knees and was heaving into a coughing fit. His eyes continually going in and out of a full glow to defensive. Krista straight away leapt over to him in one single motion, landing gracefully in front of him placing a hand on Armin’s shoulder.

 

“Armin, what’s wrong?” A few seconds later his heavy breathing stopped and he stood up, brushing off his clothes.

“It’s nothing I’m okay now.” Krista gave Ymir a look as if to ask if they should continue on the matter. Ymir shook her head. Krista sighed. “okay…” She then turned to me and smiled. I was then met with a great big hug by her. Her breastplate dug into my chest that was still in pain from the Titan fight.

“Thank You Eren, you did really well.” She whispered in my ear.

 

“What are you talking about, I hardly did anything?”

“Are you kidding?” Armin stepped over one of the steaming bodies and put a hand on my shoulder. It was nice to see those blue eyes staring back at me again. Krista backed away and ran towards Ymir embracing her in a hug at the moment of contact.

“If it wasn’t for you Eren we would never of made it out alive with those Titans surrounding us.”

“He’s right.” Ymir said, placing her arm protectively around Krista’s shoulder who still had her arms wrapped around Ymir’s waist.

 

“It was a team effort. Your trust in us and Armin’s strategy is what got us out of there. You may not be like us, but like it or not you are with us now.” I had never thought about it that way. It felt good to be part of something, great even but I could still sense the painful stare coming from Armin. I knew he didn’t want me to have any part in this but at the same time he knew that we had dug a hole way too deep for me to crawl out of.

 

\---

 

Ymir had punched open a hole in the wall that led outside before more Titans could follow us. Ymir slowed down her usual faster pace to keep up with us and Krista flew low as to not lose us until we got to the forest. When we had successfully made it to the thick shrubbery of the woodland Krista descended and proceeded to running with us. The trees and the branches was way too closed in together for her to spread her wingspan in flight.

 

“Where exactly are we?” Armin asked, bringing one of his blades out in front of him to cut down branches and bigger plants that blocked their path. Armin and Ymir walked in front while Krista and I tailed behind.

“On the outskirts of Karanase,” Ymir started. “Krista found you last night surrounded by those Titans. She tried to call out to you but you both were already out.”

“Where we were you?” I asked.

“I was actually… umm…”

“You were looking for Jean weren’t you.” Armin stopped in his tracks. Krista jumped over Ymir and Armin and landed in front of him.

“Oh my gosh I didn’t even think… are you okay? Do you know where he is?” Krista frantically asked.

 

Ymir lightly removed Krista’s hands from shaking Armin’s shoulders. I had completely forgotten Jean had been captured throughout all the chaos. But Armin must have had it in the back of his mind the whole time. Armin finally shook his head at Krista looking down at his feet.

“Hey don’t worry, we’ll find him.” Ymir comforted. Armin nodded, more to himself then to her I thought.

 

We continued to walk, Armin having a conversation with Ymir that I couldn’t hear and I didn’t want to intrude on. Krista had her hands crossed under her breasts as she walked next to me. Worry was practically written all over her face.

“Hey, are you okay?”

“Hm? Oh yea, just worried about Jean.” She answered uncrossing her arms from around her. I proceeded to making polite small talk with her, trying to make the tedious journey that we were having go a little bit faster. The first thing I asked about was if she was cold. It was coming to night time and all she had on was the same metal and leather armour bikini and boots. She explained that she really couldn’t wear anything else. The breastplate was the only thing that could be placed on around her wings. As for the metal around her hands and the war skirt, normal clothing or the only clothing she could really get her hands on irritated her as she flew so the less she wore the better.

 

“And seeing as I am a Titan, I can’t exactly get cold.” She giggled at this, I myself giving off a slight chuckle at the joke.

“So… you are a Titan then?”

“Hmhm, Yep. How much had Armin already told you?”

“Not much actually.” I said, looking towards Armin who was staring up at the now risen moon instead of where he was going. Ymir grabbed his head and turned him towards the way they were walking which started him giggling like a child.

 

“So he didn’t tell you about the different species of Titan?” I shook my head, now intrigued at the prospect of this piece of information he decided to leave out. She proceeded to tell me about how there were four different Titans that lived within their Titan headquarter of Utgard. The first was the Winged Titans who were like her.

 

The Titans who were like this all had wings grow from under their shoulderblades. She didn’t got into all the science details but basically when the Doctor created them, they were intended to be messengers for him. They also have a strong connection with the Air element which was why she was able to heal me so easily without having to do any latin incantations. This connection with the air also allowed them to go partially invisible when they had to, which was how she and Ymir were able to get into the facility without being detected at first.

 

The next were the Claws or the Clawed Titans. The Doctor created them as a form of entertainment. Only conducting the experiment on females, they were intended to be sexy feline-type beasts that he could play with whenever he wanted. However, it only backfired on him, the feral instincts taking over and most of them turned on him and got out of there pretty fast with their heightened animalistic traits.

 

The Elfen were ones that were much like Satyr’s. She didn’t know why the Doctor created them but she did point out that not a lot of them were made. They only had two at Utgard. The ‘Bambi’s’ as they were nicknamed due to their hooved feet and fawn like demeanour, had a strong connection with nature as well as great healing abilities and can sense danger long before anyone else could.

 

The last was what most Titan’s were. The same as all the one’s we had fought before and the same as Armin, Ymir and Jean, the Deviants. This class of Titans was so big that it was divided. The Titan differed depending on how their body responded to the Doctor’s experiment. Those who had increased speed, were Speed Deviants, increased strength and power were Power Deviants and this was the same for increased agility, focus, intellect, and stealth. The one thing that all Titans had in common though was they all were bulletproof. They had no idea how or why but that was just the way it was.

 

“So what subclasses are Armin and Ymir then?” I asked through a yawn.

“Well, Ymir is a Speed Deviant, but Armin…  is different.”

“Different how?”

“He’s not like the other Titans,” she stopped to make sure Armin was occupied and wasn’t listening to what she was about to say. “He was the test trial. He was the first Titan.” I stopped walking.

“Is that why it was so painful for him?” Krista nodded.

“The doctor had become impatient and just wanted to get it over and done with. He had been trying to get Armin for months, so when he was finally able to get a hold of him, he didn’t waste anytime. It was him and five others that had the experiment conducted on. He was the only one who survived. He doesn’t have one deviant ability, he has them all.” I was given no time to take all this information in as just ahead of us Armin had collapsed to the ground. Ymir crouched down to him asking if he was okay. Krista and I were also both running towards him. His eyes were closed and his breathing was rapid.

 

When he opened his eyes they were the concentrated glow.

“It’s Jean, he’s talking, give me a minute. I’m okay.” He said. We all moved Armin to a more comfortable sitting position, out of the dirt and on to a rock. We had waited a few minutes before we saw rage fill the entirety of Armin’s body. He picked up a large rock and threw it at another letting it crumble into a million little pieces. He roared through the wind and collapsed to his knees trembling.

 

I had not seen Armin lose it like this in a while and it scared me. He looked up and stared Krista directly in the eyes. Krista gasped and raised a hand to her mouth, sending the same message to Ymir who cursed and kicked a nearby tree hard. I was so confused. What had happened? I continued to repeat that question until all three looked at me sympathetically. Then Armin’s voice made it’s way into my head.

 

_I know where Jean is, and you are not going to like it…_

 

\---

 

What the hell do you think you’re doing horse-face

Jean wait don’t cut out ye-

**_Shit… No… Wait!_ **

You son of a bitch, how did your pathetic blond boy-toy get out of there? There was over a hundred people guarding that facility

_**You… Obviously… Underestimated… his capability…** _

Who else is there? Someone must of gotten them out?

_**Ha… Like I would tell a monster like you… ugh-** _

 We are not the monsters here

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Jean (Italic Bold)  
> Armin (Underline)  
> Unknown (Normal)


	17. A Dance to the Past

I did not like this idea. Scratch that, I hated the idea. There was no on hell that Armin could possibly think this was our best option. None of us could think up anything different but I would of much rather have gone with plan A, blades up, guns firing and all. I would of happily been a decoy if Armin would of just allowed me so the three of them could sneak in and save Jean, but apparently that was out of the question.

 

Earlier in the forest, ideas tossed around Armin's head like a seashell stuck in a current. Constantly going round and round in circles, never going anywhere but still circling back to the same conclusion, he would have to be the distraction. When he told me I wouldn’t like it, a million thoughts ran through my head. Was Jean dead? Would I have to leave? Were we all in danger again? But no. It was none of those, unless you count the last one. Being a Titan or being involved with Titans seemed to come with the price of danger wherever you walk.

 

“I thought I would never have to see that place again.” Armin whispered, clutching his knees tightly to his chest as Krista wrapped one of her wings tightly around his shoulder as comfort. He looked more like he was in a state of shock rather than sadness.

“What place? Where is Jean, Armin?” I asked, slowly crawling towards him on the ground so that I could speak to him at eye level. Ymir was still pacing back-and-forth between trees, occasionally punching or kicking one out of frustration with a grunt, sending loose leaves and branches falling with the wind. Krista kept looking at her with pleading eyes for her to stop.

 

Armin stood, removing the delicate white comfort from his shoulder, brushing off the excess leaves and dirt that stuck to his pants. Krista and I followed suit, waiting for an answer from the distressed blond.

“Remember how I told you about that day I was kidnapped,” It was then that I wished I could become one of those trees that Ymir was kicking and knocking over. I would gladly be knocked out, if it meant I didn’t have to be reminded of that day again. “I was taken to a strip club called Isayama. It’s just outside of Karanase. That’s where Jean is. He’s been held captive under the club.” The whole time Armin avoided eye contact and kept a neutral expression plastered on his face, making it extremely difficult to decipher how he really felt on the situation. Me on the other hand was as stiff as those trees.

 

Despite his traumatic news he was the only one who was keeping a level-head in this situation. Krista was filled with worry, Ymir was taking out her anger on nearby nature and my gut was once again filled with regret and guilt from the day he was taken away. Not only that but did he say strip club? Everyone else seemed to have intense emotions here except for him. He just seemed… mad.

“So what are we going to do?” Krista finally chirped in. Ymir had stopped her frantic pacing and had sat herself down on a nearby rock. We all went and congregated in a circle by there. Armin grabbed a stick from the overhanging tree and began drawing a bird’s eye view of what Isayama looked like, indicating different rooms, the entrances and the exits with abbreviations of what they were called. The fact that the mapping of that sinful place had been embedded into Armin’s head made me cringe.  

 

There were rooms especially designed for the different activities one would partake in a strip club. I had never had the ‘pleasure’ of going to one so this was all quite new to me. It was a circular complex with the main stage dead centre in the middle, with smaller singular rooms going around the upper circumference of the buildings. After he had finished his plot of geometric shapes he raised his hand to his chin in thought. We all waited anxiously for what he was going to come up with.

 

I always knew when Armin was close to an answer he was trying to solve. His nose would scrunch up in the cutest way, his eyebrows would twitch slightly and he would begin mumbling incoherent sounds from the words he was trying to fix together to make a complete analysis. I was glad that habit wasn’t erased when he was turned.

 

Although it was nearly pitch black being in the dead of night, all three of the Titans eyes glowed in their natural colours. Ymir’s shone brown like the branches that tickled the back of my neck where I sat while Armin’s and Krista’s gleamed a pristine ocean blue that twinkled like the stars above. The wind blew Armin’s magenta streaks across his face as he released his hand from in front of his mouth pointed to the entrance in his diagram labelled ‘E1’ - Entrance 1.

 

“This is what I’ve got, you may not agree with me, but trust me when I say this is the best option we have. At least… it’s the safest.” The last part he atoned towards me. We all nodded and urged him to continue.

“Okay, the main objective here is to get in and out without drawing attention to ourselves and to get Jean out without any of the staff noticing. Ymir, Eren…” We both perked up. “You two are going to have to work together, is that okay?” Ymir made a ‘tch’ noise and rolled her eyes. “Good, you two are going to be in charge of finding Jean and getting him out. Krista, you are going to be on the outside working as our eyes. We’ll get you to use your invisibility to fly overhead and alert Ymir if you hear or see anything that might put us in danger. Your Winged Titan hearing should work well for you to hear anything that might give us away.” Krista immediately agreed, clenching her right fist across her heart in a salute informing him that she won’t let the team down.

 

“And what will you be doing, Armin?” Ymir asked. Armin bit his fist in his hand and pulled out his Storage Modulator. He pulled out two different outfits, one boy’s, one girl’s. He passed the short skirt and tank top to Ymir, while passing the skinny jeans and white t-shirt to me. He then slowly pulled out a tie, slim black pants, a white collared shirt and a black blazer jacket.

“NO, ABSOLUTELY NOT!” Ymir yelled throwing her clothes to the floor. Krista ran up to her and clenched her arm in her grasp.

“I don’t like this anymore than you do Ymir, but it really is the only way!”

“Armin, why do you have a suit?” He looked at me and gave me a pained smile.

“The only way we can get through is if we blend in. You and Ymir will act as if you are simply going to enjoy the show. A show… that I… that I need to put on.” My mouth dropped.

“But- but you were- you were taken away, how can- how can you-”  
“It’s simple. The boss was always very fond of me. Once I walk in there he won’t care where I had been. He will not hesitate to put me in to his next show. The fact that I have ‘returned’ will distract most of the perverted guard. Afterwards, the boss will probably want to take me to a private room. When I go, I need you and Ymir to sneak behind the bar. You will see a hidden staircase by the fridge. Go down there and I will get as much information from the boss as I can and connect it to you.” Armin had drawn an X where the staircase would be and a large O where he would be performing. My eyes never left that O.

 

Was this really the only way? It would off been a great time for Ymir to pull out an axe at this point at start chopping away until all my branches and leaves had completely left and gone with the wind. That wind that was always with me. Always guiding me on the right path. Armin had said that air would definitely be his element when he died and passed onto the afterlife, that he would act as a guardian for people in need. It had nearly killed me and saved me so many times. It had steered me on so many paths, choking me with Reiner, aiding Armin, Ymir and Krista back at our confinement and challenging my focus while practicing with Armin. No matter what it was always there, leading me on the right path. Right now, it was flowing past my face and straight into Armin’s.

 

My chest was heaving at the thought of anyone doing any sort of vile things to him. What hurt even more was the thought of what would be going through other people’s mind when he would get up on the stage, presumably in that suit. The dirty thoughts that would pass through people’s minds as he would hold the pole in his delicate hands that they would never get ahold of. The things they would want to do to him when he would strip off his jacket and remove his shirt, the amount people would pay to just get one small touch of the dancer Armin Arlert.

 

It made me sick to the bone. What that boss would do to him in their ‘private room’. What Armin would have to endure just to find Jean. Would he have to dance for him? Strip for him? Or even have to have… How could he possibly think this was a good idea. To have people want him in that way, to have people lust for him, just to save his friend. Does Jean know he’s doing this? Surely he couldn’t agree with this?

“There has to be another way! Can’t we just use me as bait? They want me anyway, it would be the perfect distraction.” I didn’t even know what I was blabbering out of my pathetic mouth, flashbacks of what Armin had told me at the campfire about his time at Isayama had completely blocked any sort of self-awareness.

 

“It’s too dangerous Eren. You could get captured or worse killed. This is the safest option, don’t worry I will be okay. I’m bringing this with me.” From out of his sleeve he brought out a small but very sharp dirk. He tucked it into his boot and patted it to emphasise its safety.

“We should all get changed just before we get out this forest. Krista, are you good to fly ahead and scout?” Krista nodded and began jogging through the trees, her ear-piercing Titan call echoing through the night signalling us to follow her. Reluctantly I followed Armin and Ymir through the forest to execute this mentally breaking plan. I knew I had to keep my focus but I couldn’t. It seemed selfish but this was too much for me to handle. Looking at the jeans and the t-shirt in my arms as I ran, I knew there was only thing that I could do. I was just going to have to trust Armin’s judgement. If he believed he would be okay then everything should’ve played out smoothly.

 

Or... so we thought.

 

\---

 

The thumping of the music vibrated through the ground beneath us, leaving a tingling sensation in my feet. Atleast I hope that was what the tingling was from otherwise it was the nerves flooding in from the fear of screwing up this plan. Ymir was constantly fiddling with her skirt beside me, adjusting its length so that Krista wouldn’t stare. It was safe to assume that after some of the comments exchanged between the two about her outfit that they were definitely an item.

 

Krista had perched herself on the roof of ‘Isayama’, only a faint silhouette of her wings and body could be captured with the naked eye and even then, if I didn’t know she was there I would never have known. She wasn’t kidding when she said she could go invisible. Armin drilled out the plan one more time as he adjusted the tie on his black and white suit. He looked more like he was going to a formal dinner than a strip club.

 

After a long pause, Krista contacted Ymir that it was safe to go. Armin headed in first as not to alert the fact that we were with him. As soon as he walked in, I heard the receptionist belt out a hearty greeting as they caught up on each other’s lives and what they had been up to like they were the best of friends.

_Okay, you can come in now, Armin’s voice rang in my head. I gestured to Ymir and we both were let in by the bouncer._

 

The music had lifted to a harsh bass continuation, mixed with shot glasses clinking and men and women cheering. Examining the room, Armin’s diagrams had seemed exactly to scale. The circular shape that was in the middle was indeed littered with velvet lounges and cages hung by the roof. The dancers were stuck in their like birds. None of them looked older than twenty. It was disgusting looking at these middle-aged men throw money into those cages like they were some kind of animal.

 

Everyone in the room looked suspicious. I felt as if anyone of them would reveal their true form, bear their canines and shine their violet-demon eyes and puncture their blade into my chest if I didn’t keep on my toes. The anxiety was causing me to panic a bit, but the past few days had aided me in a real-life application practice of channeling that to fear and adrenalin. One would think I would be a professional at this point.

 

At the top sector of the circle was an elevated semi-circular stage that had a runway that cut down the middle of the circular room. The stage had multi-coloured flashing lasers that lighted in different ways around the room, occasionally blinding me from moving to my eyes. At the end of that runway was a vacant pole waiting for it’s next act to have it’s hands placed on. The main thing I had to focus on though was where those stairs to the underground basement were. Where Jean was being held.

 

Finding the bar was easy, heading to the bar wasn’t. The pungent odour of sweat on brass metal poles stirred within vomit and alcohol made it all that much harder to stand up straight. This was only the second time I had ever been in an environment like this and the first time wasn’t the most pleasant experience of my life.

 

_“I suggest you step to the side, this could get messy.”_

_“We are here for the boy, it would be wiser for YOU to step to the side, unless you want your blood to stain these walls.”_

_“I think it would be easier Reiner, if I just took what sorry excuse you have for a life away.”_

_“I dare you to try.”_

 

Ymir snapped me out of my thoughts and pointed towards the rectangular surrounding rooms that Armin had drawn around the circular main stage room. Some had the curtains closed and some were still lit up in contrast to the dark laser lit room. We finally made it to the bar and Ymir and I sat in between two overly intoxicated groups of people. Ymir ordered two drinks so that we could ‘blend in with the crowd’ as Armin had called it and we sipped them casually.

 

I glanced back at the receptionist desk to see if Armin was still talking to that guy. They were still talking to him, only he was now joined by two others and what I presumed to be the boss, his large, filthy, iron-ring covered hands wrapped around Armin’s waist, pulling him closer with each second until he was practically suffocating under his armpit.

 

I felt anger rise in me. I put my cup down and went to remove those grubby hands from my best friend but Ymir put an arm out in front of me with a look that said _Don’t, he knows what he’s doing, don't’ draw attention to yourself._ The man with his arms around Armin’s waist was gradually getting lower until one of his hands was cupping Armin’s ass firmly. I had to force myself to look away to save myself from tears of frustration and rage.

 

I knew this was an act and this was all for the good of his friend, but did he really have to go through this to get him. After sculling my drink, practically coughing up my lungs afterwards, I looked back to see that the boss had his hands still on Armin’s ass leading him to a door that had a sign labelled. “Staff Entry Only”. I hoped to God that wasn’t the private room.

 

\---

 

Ymir tapped me on the shoulder and pointed towards a dark patch next to the fridge wear they keeped their ice. It was the stairwell to the basement. Suddenly the music died down and so did the lights. The adolescent dancers in the cage stopped as well. Confused mumbling erupted within the crowd. A booming voice engaged everyone’s attention, even some of the guards had turned to see what was happening. Most of the club had gathered around the stage with their glow sticks and shot glasses.

“LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!” The crowd cheered with their enthusiasm. Ymir leaned over and whispered in my ear, “get ready…”.

 

“Sorry for the interruption but tonight we have a special treat for you all.” Loose confused chatter scattered around the room. Even the caged dancers looked at each other in confusion. I caught one that was sitting down with his knees up to his chest, his brunette bob-cut hanging over his face in shame. He looked so human yet he was caged like the animals they treated him as. Others maybe couldn’t see it, but I could. Just because they were put in a cage doesn’t mean they should be treated like the animals they were labelled as. I wondered who I was really referring to.

 

“We have had a surprised visit from one of your old time favourites and he couldn’t wait to hit this stage again. I’m sure you all remember a certain blond that captured all your hearts?” The whole crowd screamed with excitement. Everyone clumped eagerly to the end of the runway where the pole was situated. Oh no.

 

“Alright everyone. let’s hear your enthusiasm… GET READY FOR… Baby Blondie.” I had to cover my ears from the intensity of the screams that came with the tag ‘Baby Blondie’. When the screaming had died down, a slow, soothing tune started to play along with the click of a spotlight that shone down on a business chair in the middle of the semi-circular stage. Sitting down in that business chair with one leg crossed over the other, head tilted down, resting on his fist on his knee was the alluring Baby Blondie.

 

I raised a hand to my face in shock. Armin. Was. Gorgeous. The black blazer jacket of his suit had been removed. His hair was roughed up, slicked in the sexiest way that only he could pull off. His tie was hanging loosely off his unbuttoned white collared shirt, teasing the crowd with only glances of his perfectly toned abs through his shirt. As the music began to get more of a stronger beat to it Armin swiftly stood with the chair in his grasp, kicking it away with the grace of a swan yet the power of a leopard. His eyes opened to the twinkle of the flashing lights, making the many men and women beneath squeal from his captivating icy stare and provocative grin.

 

The spotlight followed him like it was his own as he strutted to the beat down the runway. He stopped when he came to the long brass object at the end, slowly running his body up, down and around in a taunting yet sexy way to the slow beat of the song. He stopped when the music did. He ran one hand through his hair, the other down the middle of his body, slowly biting his lip as his hands moved down seductively. My heart raced with anticipation. He was so tantalizing it was unbearable to remove my stare. His eyes made contact with mine as his bottom hand moved over his crotch and I wasn’t sure if it was my imagination or not but I swear he winked at me as he did, like this was private dance for me. I got lost in his gaze and in the way his lustful body moved to the beat.

 

As the beat dropped and sped up, so did he. He grasped the pole like his life depended on it and dropped down to the ground as the electronic bass pumped around the stage. When he slinked back up his shirt was ripped off and thrown into the crowd, causing one of the girls to collapse in a fit of excitement. His hips whipped against the pole as he grinded against it to the beat flawlessly. He then grabbed the upper part of the pole and brought his leg up into a full split, wrapping his leg around the it and arching back to bring his other leg up so that he was suspended off of the ground.

 

This caused a mass cheering as he then moved his hands back to the pole, swung his legs down and twirled in mid air until he was left sitting on the floor with both legs on either side of the fixture. Again arching his back, with on hand on the pole he slid up and began treating the object as if it was his prey. He was the slender blond lion and this was it’s meat that he was claiming as his own. My body shuttered in complete and utter awe. His body wrapped around the brass like it was made for him. He lashed his hips violently against the pole, slowly swaying himself down in synchronization to the erotic rhythm.

 

I was completely engrossed in his performance until Ymir pulled at my arm and leapt over the bar and shrunk down as to not be seen on the otherside. I took one last glance at the sultry Baby Blondie as he started stalk like the lion he was and start teasing the crowd down below with that seductive slink to his crawl. I forced myself to stay on task, closing my eyes and leaping over the bar so I wouldn’t get distracted again.

 

Armin was right about becoming good at dancing. I didn’t even know men could be that flexible. His petite muscular body bending in all sorts of directions. That whole time his body moved teasingly with that devilishly sexy song, I couldn’t bring myself to think that it was disgusting. It was horrible that underage children are kidnapped and forced to do this, of course I still hated that. And those moves were definitely sinful.

 

I hated to admit it, but I wished I was that pole. I wanted his body to move in synchronization with mine. I wanted him to crawl on all fours in that sexy business outfit and pin me down as he allowed me to move my hand wherever I wanted on his slender, perfectly muscular body. I wanted him to wrap his legs around my waist and use me as his prey as he prowled towards me with his delicate gentle hands as I would then allow him to explore me. I wanted him, more than I ever had before.

 

But it felt wrong. It felt selfish. I must have just been so intrigued and turned on by his dancing that I wasn’t thinking straight. I couldn’t possibly think this way about my best friend. Could I?

 

\---

 

_“Status Report.”_

**“I don’t think it would be wise for me to grace that with an answer sir.”**

_“Just show me the damn data Hanji!”_

**“Okay fine Mister sour puss… here, this is all I have.”**

_“There is hardly anything there.”_

**“Which meeeeeans…”**

_“Shit! Send one of the Winged scouts to go and get them out of there, we don’t need the Garrison Regiment eliminating anymore of us. AND WHERE THE HELL IS OUR AGENT FROM KARANASE?”_

**“You may need to send two sir.”**

_“Why two?”_

**“There’s an extra dot on the screen, its the indication that someone is wearing Armin’s _Flugel die Freiheit.”_**

_ “Eren? How on earth are you still alive?” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Rivaille (Italics)  
> Hanji (Bold)


	18. Dreaming While Awake

A tingling sensation of bile was starting to rise in my throat. Alcohol didn’t seem to mix with my seventeen year old adolescent body very well. I stopped my energised sprint to keep up with Ymir, leaning a hand on the wall to keep myself from collapsing onto my knees. The brunette turned around when she heard my gagging from down the thick aired hall. Why was it, all the tunnels we entered looked like it was built in the early twentieth century with old bricks and dust that overwhelmed lungs?

 

Ymir’s violet iris’ glowed through the dim light as she peered down at me from her demeaning stance. She made a grunt of disapproval before saying a mixture of words in latin, which eased the pain in my stomach. I mumbled a thank you as my hand scraped down the walls, pushing myself straight and grazing the tips of my fingers. Gently, she placed both of her hands onto my shoulders, shooting those violet beams at my own eyes.

 

“I know that what you saw may have shocked you, it definitely shocked me when I heard that little teddy bear had that kind of upper body strength, but we need to keep going. There are lives at stake here, including yours.” Ymir’s voice held sarcasm but it also had a hint of calm to it. I grabbed the talisman in my hand and promised myself that I would not panic this time. She took this as a sign of acknowledgement and we continued to pass through the tunnel.

 

We agreed to split up when we came to a hall with openings on both the left and the right of us. Passing through the left side of the corridor, I begun inspecting the various rooms, taking out my illuminator orb Armin had given me as a source of light. Everyone I entered had a different aura, almost a different scent to it as soon you walked in. There were private rooms that were obviously used years ago that had never been cleaned after they were left. Old sweat, dried up roses and worn out candles left a sweet-and-sour taste in my mouth. Vases were smashed, love seats had their legs shattered and maroon velvet lounges looked more like ripped velvet rags with dusted stuffing.

 

The one room I couldn’t get over though was the one I remembered so vividly. It was identical to the one at Trost University, minus the mangled professor hung by chains. The blood and old bones were strewn across the room, various chains and whips bound to the wall. I dreaded thinking what this room could of been used for. The chains were rusted and unlocked, yet the whips and bars were all placed neatly on the rack on the wall, crawling with cobwebs and cockroaches.

 

I hurried out of the room, the uneasy feeling of being trapped in that room becoming too much for me to handle. I sure as hell didn’t want this necklace going off while Armin was up there. What was he doing right now? Surely his plan must of still been in action. He’s probably got the boss with him now doing who knows what. I shuddered. _He’s intelligent, he would know what to do_ I kept telling myself in my head. But another voice had taken over the phrase. It was Armin’s.

 

 _“Ymir, found him.”_ I knew exactly where to go as soon as he said it. A male cry came from the other side of the corridor down the end where Ymir was looking. My feet thudded the ground as I took out my katana and sprinted towards the source. As I came closer, his moans and groans grew louder and louder. I cautiously peered through the crack in the metal door. Before stepping inside, my ears struggled to make out the noise of what I related it to be water boiling in a metal tin. Clunking along with the sloshing of something either thick or sticky. Walking inside, blade at the ready, I was met with another one of those rooms with chains, whips and knives. The difference with this one was there was also the source of the bubbling noise. A large machine pumping a neon blue liquid in a large translucent cylinder. Metal wires hung by the roof to the machine, cogs and gears turning and pumping in synchronization with each other.

 

Ymir was crouched over a broken Jean, kneeling on the ground, his wrist chained to the wall acting as his only source of staying up right. He looked horrible. Covered in bruises and deep gashes across his bare chest. Splotches of dripping maroon and dark purple covering his bare chest and arms. His head hung low, the slight rise and fall of his shoulders indicating that he was in fact still alive. Ymir was frantic, using her Titan speed to search every individual part of the foreign machinery.

 

When I came closer to the chained up Titan, trails of neon blue glinted in the light of my illuminator orb. I set the orb to the brightest setting to see him more clearly. He had wires and thick tubes stuck in all over his body. The tubes were inserting that blue liquid into him from the nape of his neck, the sides of his chest and his wrists. The wires were paper thin, almost invisible, making small incisions into the nerves of his arms, chest and neck. Something suddenly snapped inside of me, making me jump to my feet. I froze.

 

_A blinding white light struck me like a bolt in the sky. There was an enormous buildup of pressure in each one of my joints. No matter how much I tried there was no way to move them. When I had adjusted to the light, white lab coats, masks and hair nets surrounded my layed down body. Why couldn’t I move my body? Who are these people? Why am I here? My eyes darted around the room looking for answers out of the air. A short woman came walking over to me gently caressing a hand on to my forehead._

_“It’s okay sweetie, you’re going to be fine. You are going to be the start of something wonderful.” She said in a sweet tone before placing an oxygen mask over my mouth. I begun to shake again as a small voice cooed my name from beside me._

_“Eren… Eren…What’s wrong?… Eren… ”_

 

“EREN! SNAP OUT OF IT!” Ymir striked me against my cheek hard, leaving it stinging harshly. What on earth was that just now? Jean’s breathing had become louder and more raspy, an occasional groan of pain emitting from his body as the blue liquid continued to pump into his body.

 

I put my katana down next to my orb and lifted his head to face me. His face looked worse than his chest. There were scars and bruises masking any sort of colour that should've been there. A long gash travelled from his eyebrow, down his cheek to over his lips and that wasn’t the worst of it. A small cylindrical incision had been made through one of his cheeks. The hole was made so that you could see into his closed mouth from the outside. That bubbling feeling returned to my stomach.

  
  
  


“Why isn’t he healing?” I asked. Ymir was still inspecting the machine at an inhuman swift pace.

“Are you blind? That’s Titan poison getting pumped into his veins. Not only does it stop you’re healing but it will kill a Titan.”  I remembered the neon blue liquid that would sometimes coat the weapons Armin and Jean had used when killing other Titans. It had spilled from the neck of Reiner when he was decapitated.

 

“But then how is Jean still alive?”

“There must have something in him keeping him alive, just keep an eye on him, try to wake him up if you can.” I started lightly patting Jeans intact cheek, softly repeating his name which only earned me a few groans and the occasional eye flutter. Hard thumps of running through the corridor came from behind us. My body started to cease up at the thought of us being caught when we had only just found him.

“Don’t worry, it’s not one of them.” Ymir called out. I looked back toward the doorway to see Armin. The blazer and tie of his suit was no longer there, only a blood-stained opened collared shirt and his normal black pants he usually wore instead of his stage ones. His violet eyes were filled with worry when he peered over me to see his blood-bond partner.

 

“Thank God, you took your bloody time. How the fuck do you turn this thing off.” Ymir exclaimed while bashing the metallic cogs creating a rustic echo through the room. I felt a leg move from under me and saw Jean beginning to fidget, opening his un-gashed eye to as much as his body could allow.

“Cut the wires from above, I don’t think he has any life support on.” Armin frantically said as he kneeled beside me, cupping Jean’s cheeks in his hands. He gasped when he saw the hole. Ymir had a sword out and was beginning to cut the wires from above. The machine gave a soft hum as it began to shut down.

“How is he still alive if there was nothing supporting it?” Ymir asked behind us. Armin continued to try and soothe Jean, pulling the thinner wires out of arms and neck.

“The solution is diluted. It won’t kill him, only deteriorate his body slowly and stop his healing process.”

 

Jean gave a relieving sigh as the machine completely shut off. His shoulders heaving down as Armin ripped the metal chains from his wrist. He collapsed into Armin’s arms exhausted. The tubes were still stuck inside, the last of the blue liquid entering into his bloodstream. Armin went to pull out one of the last wires, a much thicker one that was connected into his back where his heart would be. As Armin got a hold of it Jean grabbed his wrist, stopping him from taking it out. Armin gave him a scowl.

 

“Please- don’t... it… it will hurt you.” He coughed in a grave voice. Armin didn’t care as he pulled the wire out of his back. I wasn’t too sure what that wire was for but as soon as it was removed, Armin had too fallen to his hands and knees gritting his teeth and clenching his eyes shut from what I assumed was pain. Jean on the other seemed more relieved as he was able to muster up the energy to pull the rest of the tubes from his body.

 

“I told- *cough* not- to do that… there was a reason that was there” Jean whispered. He attempted to rise to his feet but soon collapsed. Armin laid a hand on his shoulder, raising his chin to look at him.

“Don’t… you ever… block me out…  of your pain like that again.” He breathed. Jean nodded as Armin stood and helped him up over his shoulders. His healing still hadn’t kicked in yet but it was definitely helping him stay conscious. I couldn’t help but feel happy that this plan had actually worked. It definitely went smoother than I had thought it would.

 

“What happened with the boss?” Ymir enquired as she stood there happily kicking the living daylights out of the Titan poisoning machine out of spite. Armin’s face suddenly changed from concerned to pained. He reached into his boots and pulled out the knife he had hidden. It was covered in blood.

“Oh I umm… I took c- care of him…” He threw the knife over to Ymir who stood there stunned. We all were. I knew there was blood on his shirt but it didn’t cross my mind that it was… And so quickly too. Jean’s face switched to shock when his gaze travelled from the knife on the ground to the human standing over it. Me.

 

“I was hoping you would have not been manipulated so easily into this.” He said to me.

“I agreed to come, it was my decision.” I replied as I picked up my katana and illuminator orb. A small smile formed on his face out of humour at my response. How this situation was funny, I had no clue.

 

“Let’s not worry about that now we need to get out of here, I’m getting a bad vibe from Krista.”

“Agreed let’s go, you ready Jean?” Jean nodded and we left at a slow run. I stopped at the doorway looking back at the leaking blue liquid and cut wires on the floor where Jean was. What was that blackout I had? That had never happened before. Even when I had panic attacks everything would just fade like time wasn’t a measure. Never would I get transported to a different world. I was dreaming yet I was awake.

 

\---

 

Ymir came to a stop as we arrived at the exit of the tunnel. Armin asked what the problem was, I too was confused. Jean was struggling to keep up with an arm around Armin’s shoulder, constantly limping and breathing heavily so the stop was a relief to him.

“Krista’s abandoned her post, the Garrison Regiment is here.” Ymir whispered in urgency. Jean cursed under his breath, stepping away from Armin to stand on his own. He was shaking as he slid his hand over his BA that Ymir had retrieved for him back at the other room. Two shining daggers materialised into his hands. I gave him a look asking if he was okay to be doing this, Armin did the same. He simply nodded, kissing his dagger, stating that; “If I don’t fight I die, simple as that.”

 

I re-gripped the Katana in my hands as Armin replaced his white bloodied shirt with his normal black one, along with his hood, giving the same sort of attire to Jean. His white shirt was torn off and thrown across the room in a bloodied heap. His tight black shirt was placed quickly over the top, gripping his muscles tightly, he then put the hood over his neck and head, Jean following suit. Ymir and I were stuck in our ‘clubbing’ outfits for the time being. Ymir put away her sword and replaced it with a bo staff.

 

Krista cry rang from outside the walls.

“Someone’s coming!” Armin called out, pushing me and Jean into a small crevice in the wall. Ymir sped off down the corridor to hide, while Armin positioned himself opposite us, going partially invisible like Krista had done on the roof. It shocked me at first, only being able to see the faint outline of his swords and body against the wall. The silence was broken by the creak of the trapdoor, leading down into these tunnels and the echoing footsteps as the person made it’s descension. As the footsteps grew louder so did my heartbeat. He was going to find us for sure. We’re screwed. My hands dug deep into the brick wall, as I stared at Jean opposite me doing the same, placing his back firmly against the wall.

 

The footsteps became slower and closer. I placed a hand over my mouth to stop my heavy breathing. As soon as I did, the footsteps stopped. The gravelly sound of heels turning on the ground made my stomach drop. My necklace started to illuminate and steam rose up on my chest. I placed my palm on top of it and began counting down from ten in my head, my other hand still over my mouth to muffle my rough breathing. I didn’t dare close my eyes. Repetitive echoing thuds made it’s way closer and closer behind me until I could practically feel it on top of me. I hesitantly turned my head to see a Titan with full glowing demon-titan eyes dressed in all black with a longsword in his hands.

 

I stopped breathing altogether. Big mistake. The sudden hitch in my voice caused the Titan to look directly at me. His teeth bared at me as he screamed “Hey!”. I wasn’t given enough time to panic before a bow had stricken the man straight into in the temple, instantly killing him. He collapsed to the floor loudly. A pair of white wings began to emerge from behind the hovering bow as Krista removed her invisibility, her soft blue eyes shining in the dark.

“Are you guys okay?” Armin reemerged as well answering for us. Ymir came running back instantly wrapping Krista in a hug when she saw the blond. She kissed her forehead. When she pulled back, she softly whispered “that’s my girl”. Krista’s smile instantly faded when she saw the terrible state Jean was in.

 

“We need to get you out of here! You too Eren, it’s you they seem to be looking for.” Krista exclaimed grabbing Ymir’s hand and hurrying up the stairs to the ground level. Did that mean that I was the reason Jean was captured in the first place? It was my fault he had hole drilled into his face. I couldn’t really be that important.

 

“Wait!” I called out to her. She turned around, her wings moving out of the way from my view of her.

“Why me?” She paused for a moment. We all stayed silent. It was an odd type of silent, as I presumed there would be crashing,thrashing, banging or at least screaming from the Garrison Regiment’s raid. Finally, Krista sighed.

“I don’t know Eren. And even if we did, this isn’t the time or place to tell you. If we don’t get to Jean soon he may get worse. We need to get out of here.”

“Agreed,” Ymir started. “Let's make a move.” Armin and Jean nodded. While I bowed my head and raised my blade to a defensive position. _Bring it on._

 

\---

 

This fight wasn’t as nearly as hard as what we had encountered before. There was no one in the club, as they all had waited outside for us.  The whole club had been evacuated while we were down in the cellars. Half as many Titans, and no ranged attackers. The main objective was to run, slicing down any enemies that came toward our direction. Armin dedicated himself in front of Jean, making sure he was protected at all times while Krista shot her arrows from above, signalling who Ymir and I’s next targets should be. Once again, I had gotten into a one-on-one battle with one of the Titans. A female with bright pink hair that matched the colour of her glowing possessed eyes. It made me wonder what sort of person she was before she was turned. How she had come to this point. What sort of dreams did she have planned for the future? Did she have a family? Did she also have friends that she had to abandon or were forced to abandon? Did she also come here before being turned like Armin? The thoughts clouded my brain so much that I ended up getting sliced down my chest.

 

The titan pushed me down with one foot onto the hard ground beneath me, a rock hitting my head in the process, sending blood running down the back of my neck. Before she got the chance to strike, Krista had an arrow go straight through the back of her neck, following through her mouth. The girl collapsed on top of me, leaving me winded underneath her. I rolled my hips sliding her off me. I stared for the last time into her lifeless eyes wondering when that would be me until the steam from her evaporating body covered them whole.

 

I was about to rise again, ready to continue to fight when a small hand was poised in my direction.

“You’re definitely getting better, I can tell you that much.” Armin chuckled as he lifted me up, brushing off my back and starting his short incantation at the slash on my chest. I stared at the fifteen or so evaporating bodies around us, blocking the wooziness that came from the healing. They all had lives once. All had something to strive towards. What do they have now? A swirling supernova of a dark abyss. To put it lightly, nothing. Armin tugged on my arm pulling me out of my thoughts when he was finished, following the rest of the squad back into the forest to escape anymore unnecessary encounters. As I dove into the sea of leaves and shrubbery in the early morning dark, I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe there were different types of darkness. Maybe darkness didn’t always come with the loss of your life as a human, maybe no longer having a life didn’t always arrive in darkness.

 

\---

 

**"You have got to be kidding me! The whole of Karanase? Wiped Out?”**

_"I’m sorry sir, but that’s all that we could find out, two of Squad 8’s members died in the process of retrieving that information.”_

**"This is getting out of hand”**

“Come on big bro, cheer up. There’s not much we can do about it now.”

“She’s right Rivaille, wait till Armin gets back and you can send him out to hunt as punishment for leaving.”

**“I’m not the boss here, the brat can do whatever he bloody well likes.”**

“Suit yourself, but you know we are going to run out of food very easily if we don’t get someone out there.”

**“Fine, I’ll send someone out. Just let me think about how we are going to get supplies for the next however many years we are going to be stuck in this hell hole.”**

 “No problem big bro, we’ll leave you be. Come on, let’s go interrogate the newbies.”

_“Hell yea I’m in!”_

“You guys are so immature… ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Rivaille (Bold)  
> Hanji (Italics)  
> Unknown Female (Underline)  
> Unknown Male (Normal)
> 
> Can you guess who the Unknown Female and Male are?


	19. The Vulgaris

We arrived at a cliff roost about ten kilometres or so away from the burning town of Karanase. It was a breath of fresh air to know we were well away from that place and that club. But there were more important matters to attend to. Armin plonked Jean onto the hard cold ground of the early morning dark. Glints of purple and orange resonated a dim light onto our little summit peering over the forest. Jean on the way here, had started vomiting up all of the blue gunk that had been built up into his bloodstream along with a lot of the blood that came with it. His eyes were glowing beams through the dawn and Armin struggled to keep up with the pain that Jean was unintentionally inflicting on him through his bond.

Ymir stood guard above, watching through the canopy for any unwanted guests while Krista started tending to Jean straight away. Unlike them, I was completely exhausted. It was true I had gotten stronger but I was still dragging them down. If I wasn't here Jean could've been tended to ages ago. We wouldn't of had to go at a slow steady pace so I could keep up. Thinking about it, Jean wouldn't of even been hurt if it wasn't for me. He wouldn't of gotten kidnapped. Ymir and Krista wouldn't of had to save us from that confinement. And Armin may have never had risked his life in protecting me.

It was frustrating to the bone. I was the runt of the litter. The runt with a friend who actually cares and puts his life on the line for the people he cares about, including Jean. He sat there with his arm around Jean's neck, supporting him up straight against the rock wall gently as Krista hummed her incantation of healing, leaving a white aura around her. Her eyes gleamed their glistening un-pigmented hue to the beat of her melodious rejuvenating process. She truly was an angel. Jean gritted his teeth at the sudden bursts of pain that came from Armin's careful extraction of broken Titan poison infused wires that had been left in after he had pulled them out without care. Some of his bones clicked and cracked back into place causing me to cringe.

Armin shushed his groans of pain, easing him into a sleep like trance as he combed his blood-stained fingers through Jean's hair. The blonde had pulled his hair back into a ponytail, exposing not only the magenta streak in his hair, but also a strange mark on the back of his neck. A circular hole in the centre of the back of his neck. The scar seemed old, yet at the same time, they still had the pinkish uplifted tissue surrounding it indicating that it may of still held some form of discomfort towards him.

Jean eventually fell asleep after Krista had finished, she too was exhausted from how much power was needed to aid him back to health. She had beads of sweat dripping down her face as the sun began to slowly rise higher, taking away some of the nipping chill. Ymir still held her position at the the peak kicking some pebbles off the edge out of boredom. I didn't bother questioning how she could see through that thick canopy of the forest. I assumed it was some Titan ability that I was once again kept on the hush-hush about. It was hard for me to understand this fully, I got that, but it didn't mean that I wouldn't occasionally become irritated when I found out something that would've been useful in the past.

Armin stared at Jean for a while longer as he fell asleep while Krista went to join Ymir. He sighed and took his hood from around his neck placing it down over Jean as a blanket. I crawled across the granite cliff and placed myself next to Armin. He greeted me with a 'hey' and went back to slowly stroking Jean's hair.

"You two are really close huh?" I asked out of genuine curiosity.

"Yea, yea we are," he smiled. "I mean, he has saved me, more than once. He took me to Utgard in the first place, he's stuck by me this whole time, we practically share a life. He as close to a blood-related brother as I'm ever going to get." A pang of jealousy rose inside me, screaming to be let out. He sensed my sudden rage and placed a hand on my shoulder.

" _Blood_  - related Eren. We are bound remember, we share each other's DNA in a way. If he dies, a part of me dies with him and vice versa. I will still always see you as my best friend Eren." Armin attempted to take my anger away with his charm which he reluctantly succeeded with. No one can get made at those baby blue eyes and that adorable grin he pulled when he wanted you to be happy.

We sat there in silence until the sun had fully emerged beyond our cliff roost, the bright sea-like sky cloudless and bare, the pre-noon heat starting to kick in. I couldn't remember the last time I had taken a proper shower, unless you included going into lakes or waterfalls, then it was probably a few days ago. My clothes stunk of dried mud, sweat, blood and tears, a mixture of a musky, salty and a rustic scent. I could of always asked Krista to help but she still seemed pretty tuckered out after her session with Jean.

"Hey Armin?"

"Yea?" He quickly responded with, turning his full attention towards me.

"How can Ymir see through those trees? I thought it may have something to do with her being a Titan." I pointed out as I saw Krista with her wings wrapped around Ymir while she she stuck her finger out towards the forest. It didn't occur to me how strong the winds were up there until I saw the blondes hair flowing aggressively past her delicate wall of white. Her wings reflected rays of sunlight into my eyes, making the two look like a silhouette in the distance.

Armin didn't seem to be registering my question. He seemed preoccupied with something on my shoulder, his gaze never leaving the spot. He removed his hands from Jean and grabbed a cloth and a small flask of alcohol from his storage modulator. He dabbed the cloth in the alcohol and placed it on my shoulder. Concern filled his features when I cringed from it's sting. Needles punctured the unknown wound that had formed at who knows what time. The adrenalin must've blocked out a lot of the cuts and bruises I had acquired. Armin proceeded to repeat the step with every cut on my body as he spoke, each one making me hiss louder.

"Titan's were created with a foreign DNA source to our own. Because of this, the molecular structure of our gene systems end up having different reactions to the Titan formula. Although there may be different assigned specialties that everyone has-"

"Woah, woah, Armin, I don't speak science." I giggled out. He laughed at my comment, almost tipping over the flask of alcohol. He apologised and continued.

"In a nutshell, each Titan reacts differently to the formula and therefore each one has an ability of some kind that is different from any- oh sorry, did I hurt you?" It was hard to understand through his gentle pats that stung on my shoulders and arms all the science-type terms that was spewing out of his intelligent mouth. I shook my head at his last inquiry.

"No no, please keep going." He nodded and placed both of his hands at the hem of my shirt, giving me a questioning look that asked  _Are you okay with this?_  I nodded. He ever so gently lifted the damp, stained shirt up over my head, leaving my chest exposed to him. We were just talking about how he still considered me really close to him. So why was I so embarrassed at his gesture and blushing above all else? I turned my head so he wouldn't see the redness come up on my cheeks. This earned me a laugh and a gentle hand upon the blushed spots turning me towards him as he dabbed lightly at my brow. I was too engrossed by his oceanic eyes to cringe again. We didn't break eye contact, time had stopped for us, all my worries seemed like nothing when the one thing that was in your vision was those loving, caring gems beaming back at you. He was the one to finally look away, ringing out the cloth and moving to my chest to aid the scars there.

"Ymir can switch her eyes so she can see things in ultra violet light, she will be able to see if any strange sources of heat is coming our way. Krista's is complicated but basically, she is able to accurately predict where something is going to go when it is thrown or shot or anything like that." It explained why she was so accurate with the bow. He gave me back my shirt after he had placed the alcohol back in his bag and lit the cloth with a snap of his fingers into a small suspended ball of flame. His blue iris' flashed purple ever so slightly as the flame lit up, going back to normal as quickly as it changed. The blue and orange ball slowly fell to the ground into a pile of ash.

"S- So, what do you have Armin?"

"Hm?"

"What sort of extra ability do you have?" I suspected it was probably something to do with the little ball of flame he had just created, but I had been wrong before. He lowered his head down while biting his lip.  _There you go again Eren_ , I told myself. I once again succeeded in bringing back another horrid memory that inflicted internal pain. He self-consciously started playing with the a stray strand of magenta in front of his face. An inaudible sarcastic like tone came from his mouth which I did not believe had the intent of my hearing. Giggling at his own comment he answered, "You don't think I'm abnormal enough? Well, if you must know, um... I- I can look into other people's dreams when they sleep. Correction, I'm  _forced_  to see and hear other's dreams when they sleep." He seemed annoyed at this amazing what I would call gift, but the look on his face told me he didn't see the ability the same way.

"Can you see his?" I asked pointing towards the sleeping Titan still next to us. Armin clenched his stomach with an arm, his other covering his mouth as he belted out the cutest laugh I had ever heard in my entire life. It was soft and sweet, yet loud and energetic at the same time, it brought a genuine smile to my face. Something I hadn't been able to get in a long time.

"Eren, Titan's don't sleep. We don't have to. Jean's been listening to us the whole time." Jean raised his thumb above him with the cockiest shit-eating grin I had ever seen.

"Even if I could Eren," Armin began, making me turn my attention away from the annoying horse face who laid there pleasantly listening to us.

"I can't see the dreams and nightmares of Titans, I can feel their emotions in their dream but I won't be able to witness or listen to it. It works for everyone else... except..." He looked over to Ymir and Krista with his arms wrapped around his body, letting out a loud almost frustrated sigh.

"Except what Armin?" He paused, that look of confused pain flooding his face again.

"Except... yours..." Immediately, he pushed himself to a stand, taking the hood off of Jean and wrapping around his neck.

"I need to go, I will be back in a few. You should get some sleep, you're the only one that actually can. Don't waste that privilege" I called for him to wait but he didn't respond. He walked to the edge of the cliff, jumping down with the grace and prowess of an eagle down onto the canopy below with little to no effort. the rustling of branches indicating his leave.

I ran my fingers through my hair, with the same frustration as he had shown. He was so distant, he hated telling me anything if it had do with him being a Titan. One minute he was black and the next he was white. Was being a Titan and having all these insane powers and abilities really that bad? I felt like I would never be able to understand him the same way I had before. And if it was true that he really couldn't see my dreams or nightmares, why?

"Don't dwell on it too much." A raspy voice reassured from below. Jean struggled to push himself up next to me. Most of his wounds had already healed leaving pale marks where the wires and tubes had pierced his skin. The hole in his cheek had all but disappeared as if nothing was ever wrong. I found an interest in a nearby pebble and started scraping along the ground out of a mixture of boredom and irritation.

"He get's this way sometimes. It will pass, he just needs some time alone I think." I nodded at his genuine care in Armin. I asked him how much he had heard of our conversation. Everything. He had heard every word.

"So... I guess you see him the same way?" Jean looked taken back from my question, but shrugged an agreement.

"Yea, he's the closest thing to family that I ever had. And I know you care about him too." I threw the pebble over the cliff with as much might as I could muster. Jean laughed at my weak attempt. Fatigue truly was beginning to take it's toll. Jean got up and begun stretching himself out for the first time since Krista had healed him. It looked like our conversation was over as he began walking over to the girls to talk with them. He stopped midway and turned to look at me.

"I meant what I said before Eren. It's best you stay away from him as much as you can. I don't know why but something has changed in him, and it never came up until you were in the picture. A vulgaris can never really work with a Titan. A vulgaris' capabilities are just too low. If you really care about him then for his sake, it's best you stand down. Try to not let him be your saviour every time you fall." He continued walking to the girls, leaving me confused and hurt.  _Try not to let him be your saviour every time you fall_. Those words repeated in my head over and over. Was I really that much of a burden? Maybe I should try to stop relying on him so much. He got me out of so many deadly situations before and I had nothing to show for it. All I could do was say thank you and brush off the access shame that came with weaknesses.

Taking Armin's advice, I layed my head down on the cool hard ground, the whooshing of the wind lulling me into an uneasy sleep. Jean's demand tumbled through my mind. I just wasn't cut out for this. I never was. What was the point of fighting if I was only going to cheat myself to the win through another person? I was sick of being the unnecessary baggage. I was sick of being the weak link in the group. I had to win, by myself. I had to fight, to save my own life.

 

\---

 

"It's okay sweetie, you're going to be fine. You are going to be the start of something wonderful." A woman said in a sweet tone before placing an oxygen mask over my mouth. I squirmed to get free but my vision was faded and the leather straps burnt my limbs every time I tried to move them. They held me down to the bed with the force of a truck, there was no way I was getting out of this. Blurs of white and blue rushed around my thin line of vision.

The beeping of a heart monitor was the only familiar sound that could be heard through the small room. Any other noises were occupied by the chatter of white coated and masked people above me. They punched records from the different machines that held wires to my body into the tablets.

"His heart rate is beating at a steady pace, loading in the digits for incision thirty-six." The sweet girl who checked up on me before acknowledged to her colleagues.

"Dr. Ral, he wants it done now." Another man interjected as she tapped onto a nearby computer. I turned my head to see the man with wide eyes and worried sweat dripping down his brow.

"No No NO! He's not ready, we still need to do some adjustments to the serum, if we don't he may not survive through the experiment. All the animals we've tested them on hasn't even survived the small dosage let alone the full procedure!" Her voice was calm yet still held panic. I once again desperately tried to pull the straps off of me. The fear of death waned over me. I screamed for them to let me go through the gas mask as they got three other men to hold my limbs down.

"Heart Rate Increasing Fast!" A man holding me down exclaimed.

"I'm sorry Doctor, but if it doesn't happen today, we all may not live to be here tomorrow." The girl nodded and came over to me, a tear threatening to spill over onto my forehead. She ran her hand through my hair. Lowering her face down next to my ear she whispered, "I'm sorry... Armin."

 

\---

 

My head felt extremely heavy, an overwhelming sense of dizziness giving me the most excruciating pain in my neck as my head shook violently. Two hands were holding my shoulders up, shaking me violently back and forth.

"EREN! EREN WAKE UP!" I opened my eyes to see myself in front of Armin whose pupils had dilated and mouth quivered in shock. My shirt was now even more saturated than it already was from my own sweat. Thirst was building up fast, an uneasy scratch settling down in my throat. That pain was ignored though when I saw I was in a completely different spot to where I first laid my head down to rest.

I sat by an illuminated pool with glowing cyan mushrooms scattered around the small dark cave. Little balls of neon blue fireflies slowly hovering around the small pool like night lights. The soft dirt ground sloped slightly from the mouth of the cave into the pool, where small bits of ferns and moss grew next to the fluorescent mushrooms and toadstools. The dim lighting from the plants reflected off the water, leaving white geometric lines racing around Armin and I throughout the cave. A small amount of the blue reflection created gave Armin a glowing highlight from below.

He asked if I was okay to which I nodded without paying much attention. I was too engrossed in the beauty of this faerie like cave to think back to that nightmare. The nightmare that I once again, couldn't fully remember. The cave matched the description of what I would read in fairy tales, where the hero would meet the beautiful guardian who resided in a night-time cave surrounded by glowing lights, waiting to offer his or her guidance and wisdom to the traveller. The small pool had no imperfections. I placed a hand into the calm blue water gently, only to feel like I was running my hand through the purest spring on the universe. It was cool to the touch, like my hand no longer held any impurities when it was submerged in the liquid. Just a mouthful of it quenched my undying thirst. Standing up slowly, I walked around the area, admiring each little aspect I could. From the depths of the pure waters, to the overhead growing vegetation that held a sense of mystery.

"Eren what were you dreaming about?" Armin demanded more then he asked. I couldn't tell if the look in his eye was still concern or if it was frustration. Maybe it was both. He had his hands crossed over his stomach as he awaited my reply.

"I- I don't really remember. I remember people yelling and me being strapped down to something but that's about it." Armin nodded and turned away, heading towards the edge of the pool where he knelt down and closed his eyes. His shoulders raised and fell with each steady breath he made. He looked at peace, an atmosphere of tranquility vibrating through the ripples of the pool as droplets from the mushrooms above slowly made it's way down into the crystal clear water, giving the cave it's own echoing song.

"Eren, I want you to go home." Armin finally said. It felt like someone had just punched me in the gut.

"I will send someone to watch over you, but you are not coming to Utgard. Like I said before I don't want you anymore involved in this mess then you already are."

I didn't know whether it was the peaceful atmosphere that had just been crushed or the new vulnerable state that Armin was in, but something had clicked inside of me. Why shouldn't he be frustrated? Why shouldn't he be mad? He faced the horrors of being kidnapped, sexually harrassed, turned into a stripper, experimented on, turned into a science experiment and then on top of all of it, spending most of his time as this new being, trying to look out for me.

Jean had been right in the point that he should stop being my saviour but leaving wasn't the way to accomplish that. Armin had been through too much, too much suffering. There was too much unhappiness, angst and violence in his life to not have someone watching out for him like he watches out for everyone else. It was time someone lighted his load.

"No." I said sternly. The look Armin gave me was one that would surely kill if it could. He opened his mouth to speak but I interrupted him.

"I don't care about what this had done to me Armin. I care about what it's done to you. I was a part of it from the start." I didn't know exactly where I was going with this but I refused to stop. "If I had been stronger that day, you wouldn't of been taken. If I had been stronger that day, you wouldn't of become a dancer. If I had been stronger that day you wouldn't of become this." I walked over to him gently tracing the magenta streak in his hair. For the first time since I've seen him as a Titan, he seemed frightened at my presence.

"I'm sorry Armin, but I cannot go. Not until I find out who did this to you. Not until I find out how to turn you back. Not until I can honestly say, that I am now strong enough to protect my you. I already lost my best friend once. I don't plan on losing him again!" My last words echoed throughout the cave making the water shake. My tone might of sounded harsh and demanding but it didn't matter. I meant what I said, and he knew that.

He clenched his fists by his side and looked down at his feet. A 'tch' emitted from his mouth.

"I'm coming with you to this place. I will become stronger. I will learn to match the strength, speed and capabilities of a Titan to the best of my ability. I may not ever want to become what you are, but it doesn't mean I am going to ignore the fact that you are hurting-" Armin gripped me in a full body hug, his arms wrapping around mine as he held me tight to his own.

"Why is it, that you're the only one that can manipulate my decisions? The only person, who can make me feel again." He released his arms from around my body, wiping the droplets that hung at the corners if his eyes. Slumping his shoulders down slightly, he walked to the mouth of the cave, placing a hand on the edge.

"I still don't want you to come, but it is your life, not mine. Get cleaned up in here and meet us back at the top when you're done, we should be going shortly. Use your BA to find your proper clothing. Oh, and if you were wondering how you got down here, Ymir carried you down here, said you shivering from the winds. I will see you in a bit." I stopped him just before he completely left to say one final thing. "Remember Armin, it was my fault you became this. I will not stop, I will never stop, until I find out how to this around." He didn't say anything after that. He quickly disappeared through the exit of the cave.

I took off my clothes, throwing them into the pool with me, leaving my necklace on as always and the boots behind me on the dirt. The water was just as refreshing to the rest of my body as it was to my hand. I grabbed the different items of clothing and started scrubbing the dirt and blood from the material. I would've expected that the water would turn a murky brown but the remnants of the mud, blood and tears seemed to just disintegrate in the water, remaining its crystal-like colour. Now only one more important question remained. How will I be able to find the horrible person who did this to him and will I truly be able to turn around his monstrous future?

 

\---

 

_"I heard you talking to Eren."_

**"What did I say about tapping into my mind Jean, you can't just go and listen to my conversations whenever you like."**

_"Hey, it's actually getting really difficult to even sense what you're feeling ever since that Vulgaris showed up. Does that suicidal maniac truly believe he's going to get as strong as us, and better yet find out who did this to us and reverse it when that has pretty much been the premises of our existence for the past year?"_

**"If he truly believes he can do it, then I don't doubt him. He's brilliant when it comes to his passion and tenacity."**

_"Hm..."_

**"Hm what Jean?"**

_"Nothing, just that I wouldn't go easy on him just cause he's a Vulgaris. So I don't think Rivaille or even Isabel would, and she's a big teddy bear."_

**"He will manage, and I would appreciate it if you didn't make decisions for me in the future, if you think Eren is affecting my ability then you tell me, you don't threaten him. Clear? And yeah, I looked in on your conversation with him as well."**

_"Jesus, when did you get so sassy? It's been a while since I've seen you genuinely pissed, what's got you so worked up?"_

**"I'm not worked up. I've just been a little since ever since Eren reminded me who the real enemy was"**

_"And what's that?"_

**"Time."**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Jean (Italic)  
> Armin (Bold)


	20. Freedom Always Comes at a Price

Armin sat across from me at our table as we attempted to complete the assignment set for us that was due in a few days. At least that's what we were supposed to be doing but Armin seemed to have other interests in mind. The library didn't have many people in it as it was a Friday night and Sasha had fallen asleep hours ago onto Armin's shoulder. This gave him the perfect opportunity to look into this cold-blooded assassin that has been terrorising the whole of Shingeki, including me. It was not like I had done anything that could cause him come after me but Levi Ackerman was known for being quick and silent with his kills, you would never know when he or his two followers would jump.

"But look at this, Eren. All of his victims have been either rapists, pedophiles or terrorists, he's doing it for the greater good of the community." Armin whispered enthusiastically as he scrolled through every possible news report and police record he could find on the victims, trying hard to be heard over Sasha's abnoxiously loud snores. I had helped him hack into the police database a few months ago and now he was bent on finding out everything he could about this 'Thug Trio'.

"Armin, if somebody sees you looking at this stuff, you could get executed on the spot. No joke, it's against the law." I exclaimed in a silent tone. He didn't take my aggressive nature to this topic as serious as I had hoped though.

"Well, you were the one who got me into it on the first place so, technically it's your fault." He stuck out his tongue at me in a playful manner and continued scrolling through the files like the little devilish criminal he was. Loud footsteps coming across the whole Library suddenly came charging in my direction. I directed at Armin to log out of the database and he did it in a flash, doing his best impression of an innocent face. Let's just say, Armin was quite the actor. You would never have known he had been doing something illegal as he sat there casually reading his textbooks and writing notes down into his tablet.

Connie came rushing out at the corner of my eye slamming his tablet right in front of me over mine, making the holographic image of Watson & Crick's DNA model collapse. Sasha instantly awoke from the slam on the table, wiping the drool that had formed where her head laid on Armin's jacket.

"What the hell Connie?" Sasha whispered as loud as she could without being scolded by the Librarian again after she was noisily chewing on her packaged snacks she had brought and had earned her place in Librarian's watch list.

"Sorry babe, but honestly, I'm trying to do this bloody assignment. And Every. Single. Sight. Is. Blocked. Eren heeeeelp." He whined obnoxiously in my ear, making the librarian turn to us and finally shush us. I agreed, only because I knew I was the only one that could hack into the libraries system and if I didn't, I would probably never get my own work done.

I put his tablet down and started entering into the library security database, making sure to cover my tracks as to not get caught if the Librarians were to get suspicious. I loved doing this. Not cause it was a crime, I just loved computers and coding. There was virtually nothing I wasn't able to hack into or decode, it was like a second language to me. Armin, Sasha and Connie all stood over my shoulder observing my fast hand work in the system. A few minutes passed and all of the restrictions on the Libraries internet service had been taken down briefly for twelve hours so that Connie could finish his work and leave me alone. If I had set it for any longer, it may have been found that the system was hacked so I had to remain cautious. It wasn't a problem with the Police's because it logs out every time Armin does and his IP address is disguised within the system.

"Thanks, Hawking!" Connie called out as he took the tablet away and continued on doing his assignment.

"What's a Hawking?" Sasha asked as she followed Connie to try and help him stay focused now that he had the freedom of looking up various games on his computer. Armin went back to his seat adjusting his glasses on his head with a yawn. He pulled them off his face and rubbed his eyes, placing the lenses onto the table.

"Tired Ar?" He nodded, closing his tablet and placing it in his shoulder bag.

"It's so cool that you can do that sort of thing though. I wish I knew as much about technology and engineering as you do." I blushed and started to put my belongings away as well. I threw on my jacket from over my seat and tucked my chair in.

"You ready to go?" I asked.

"Yea, and Eren? I think I'm okay to sleep on my own tonight." It had been a month since his father's disappearance and his night terrors and sleep paralysis had been getting increasingly worse. The only thing that would calm down was my body heat by his side.

"Are you sure? I really don't mind if you still need-"

"No, no, I need to learn to do this myself. But thank you though. For everything." He wrapped me in a hug and I hugged back. From around the corner of a bookshelf, Connie and Sasha were winking at us, hands shaped into a love heart with the biggest grins on their faces. Armin saw me looking at them, and turned and laughed. I shrugged with a smile, making him laugh even more. I placed an arm around Armin's shoulders and walked out of the library. I hoped Armin had made the right decision.

 

\---

 

The afternoon sun's heat was absolutely daunting. It was like suffocating in a deep fryer with the temperature set to the highest possible setting. We relied on Krista's wings as form of relief from the cackle of humidity, batting her wings in our direction to send breezes of wind our way. It was late morning, the day after we had arrived at this cliff edge. I had apparently slept through the whole day yesterday, waking up in the early morning dark in that cave where I had made a a life-changing promise. That's one thing I didn't take lightly, promises.  _I will not stop, I will never stop, until I find out how to turn this around._  Yet I had no idea how I would fulfil those words.

"How much longer are we going to be waiting here Kris?" Ymir groaned as both she and Jean layed down in the shade of a rock ledge on the roost, trying to absorb as much of the breeze coming from the winged titan as possible. Armin on the other hand was sitting at the very peak of the cliff, looking down into the forest, his eyebrows twitching slightly and lips moving gently indicating that he was in deep thought. What was going through that brilliant mind of his, I would never know.

"Not too much longer, they had to go back and get another as they only had two approaching." Krista called out. Armin had said we would be leaving shortly but it had been almost three hours. I had assumed we were going to walk to this 'Utgard' place, believing it was not too much further away. It felt like I had trudged half-way across the country since leaving my home town. Home... I hoped that they were okay. That Mikasa, Connie, Sasha and the others are not worrying about me too much and going with life as usual. It would of killed me to know that they were suffering out of my disappearance. And what about my mother. I had never once thought what leaving could of done for her. Not only has she lost her husband, best-friend and best-friend's son but now her only son as well. 

"Who's they?" I asked, trying to distract myself from the thought of my mother running around searching across the country for me. No sooner did I asked, did a ear-piercing banshee-like call echoed throughout the skies above. The sky was filled with what assimilated with white and grey storm clouds that grew bigger and bigger as they came closer.

I shielded my eyes, covering myself with my hands when the clouds swooped just over my head and the other Titans. They landed with their backs turned to us revealing two feathered walls of grey and one of pure white like Krista's. The landing made the forest rattle the fierce gale their wings had produced. Krista gave each one an individual hug revealing two girls, the white and the grey and another grey male. Where the girls were in much similar attire to Krista's 'armoured bikini' as I called it, the overly muscular man had no shirt on, only full black martial art style pants with matching kung-fu shoes. He did however had leather fingerless gloves and metal plates on the bends of his much less graceful, more powerful and larger looking wings.

Armin had at some point between the winged Titan's call and landing had made his way next to Jean and Ymir who were standing beside me as we watched the arrivals exchange hellos. When the three saw Armin they all immediately jumped on him, toppling him down to the ground. We all stepped back as the three talked over each other asking where he had been and how he was.

"I'm fine, I'm fine. It's so good to see you guys again." Armin chuckled as he brushed himself off to a stand. He looked so happy to see these unknown people again. It made me realise how naive I was about him leading a completely different life to what I knew him in.

Krista walked up to the female, grey-winged titan who wore glasses and her silver hair styled into a short bob-cut. Her armoured bikini was black iron rather than plate like Krista's but that suited her grey, more ragged looking wings. The armour was less fluent and nature like, giving off more of a warrior vibe with the sharp spikes that came from her shoulder pads, gauntlets and greaves. Krista tapped the woman on the shoulder slightly, gesturing over to me away from the other two who were talking with others.

I stood there awkwardly waiting for them to reach me. When she finally did the silver-haired girl gave me a friendly smile.

"Eren, this is Rico, she's a winged Titan like me. Rico this is Eren,  _a vulgaris_." Emphasising the vulgaris part made Rico's smile fade away into a confused pout. WHY IS EVERYONE SO GODDAMN CONFUSED ABOUT ME NOT BEING A TITAN.

"That's strange?" Rico informed, raising a hand to my face, squishing my cheeks in together with her hands. She tossed my head from side to side, staring intently at each aspect at my face.

"My titan powers don't seem to be working on you." She let go of my face and crossed her arms over her bare stomach, still staring at me in curiosity. She brushed it off believing it was just her personal fault but something inside told me that maybe it wasn't just her. To add to that Krista didn't look as calm as Rico did at her inability to use whatever power she had attempted to use on me.

"So anyway, Eren," Krista started, shaking off her shock. "Rico will be taking you to Utgard so I suggest you get to know and trust her in the next about umm... fifteen seconds." Krista giggled, running off to wrap her arms around Ymir from behind. Before I had a chance to argue Krista had let out one of her Titan calls, signalling the other winged Titan to ascend into the air and land behind their assigned person. Before I had a chance to protest a pair of arms were wrapped around my waist, a voice whispering into my ear 'I hope you're not afraid of heights'.

One by one each winged Titan ascended with haste into the air starting with Krista, ending with Rico and I. A bellow of panic erupted from my mouth as the sudden speed and height couldn't grip reality. It felt like the flesh of my face was going to rip of from the friction of the wind coming down as Rico and the others rose higher and higher into the atmosphere. I clenched my eyes closed, too frightened to look down.

The powerful winds blew my hair wildly, giving way to the chilling breeze of the altitude. I didn't dare open my eyes as I felt the oxygen becoming thinner and thinner. I was only beginning to drift off when a burst of oxygen enveloped me back. Rico suddenly stopped, hovering vertically in the air, her iron-plated breasts pushing uncomfortably at the blades of my shoulders. She then slowly came next to my ear and chanted in latin, something that must of been common among all titans.

" Spiritus aeris, da auxilium ... " If she hadn't been so close to my ear I wouldn't of heard a word she said. When Rico's chanting stopped, so did the surrounding noises of the wind. The only thing that could be heard now was the gentle flap of what I presumed to be wings, still not daring to open my eyes again.

Rico began moving again, tipping our bodies horizontal so that she could go forward. The wind didn't blow in my face as hard this time, but it still shook me enough that I was shivering like a scared little child in the corner of a room. A presence was sensed beside me, a hand shortly after travelling to my arm.

"Eren... look..." I recognised Armin's voice next to me. I hesitantly opened one eye to see an extraordinary sight below me. We were at least an estimated forty-five thousand feet above ground level. The trees and forest shrubbery that had been so difficult to travel through before looked like nothing more than a soft green marsh from this high above.

What was even more astonishing to the eye was what laid to the other side of the forests, past the horizon and over the mountains. A bed of electric blue that sat gently at the edge of the sandy shore. The ocean. Rico and the others swerved to changed their course so we were all now flying over where the ocean met the land. We were so high up that I could see the drop of the continental shelf of Shingeki. Ymir and Krista were in front of us, Krista flinging Ymir in the air then being catched, cheering excitedly as they had their fun. Rico and the male titan holding Armin were having a quiet conversation above us but Armin, he too looked mesmerized by the ocean that matched his eyes so well.

He turned to me beaming that gorgeous smile of his.

"It's beautiful isn't it." I nodded immediately. The sight was breath-taking. How could something so beautiful be kept only for the eyes of the birds to see as they would fly in their freedom. Freedom comes with a price. But in that price there was always a reward that would in the end be worth that small price to pay. By winning your freedom, you win the opportunity to admire something astonishing.

In the corner of my eyes, I noticed that Armin's smile was no longer there. It faded into a frown of what I could only describe to be guilt. I tapped him on the shoulder to ask what was wrong. He claimed it was nothing but I persisted.

"It's just... I'm sorry. For what happened at Isayama. That was probably one of the worst moments of my life being forced to work there. I hated doing it, so much that I hoped if I got good at it, I could... I could..." I shushed him as he failed to complete his last words.

"It's okay Armin. I understand, it was tough for you, but you did what you had to do get Jean out of there. He's safe now and so are we. We're going to be okay Ar." Armin brought back that amazing ear-to-ear smile again, making me do the same.

Although this scenery was absolutely awe-inspiring, there was one thing that was more beautiful beyond what words could describe. Armin moving down your arm to hold your hand as you glided over this masterpiece of a view. I would never forget this moment. The way his hair blew in the wind, the way our fingers intertwined, the way he looked so peaceful in this moment of awe. I would cherish this moment forever. Never in a million years would I forget this.

 

\---

 

"We're almost there guys, lets start our descension." Rico called from above me. We had travelled for over three hours, almost across the entire coast of Shingeki to get to this place. This place truly was in the middle of nowhere. I hadn't seen any towns or signs of human activity for at least an hour and Titan flying speed was pretty goddamn fast. I was both nervous and intrigued at the same time. I wondered how many people would be there. I imagined hundreds upon hundreds of titans all gathering to fight a common cause but then I remembered Armin telling me that there were no more than a hundred, and no more than thirty or so were able to fight which had surprised me. Titans seemed built for war and fighting so the thought that there were some who couldn't, baffled me.

Although we were close, it sure didn't seem like it. We were heading straight towards a thick blanket of fog and nothing but native woodlands laid below us. As we made our slow descension Armin tapped me on the shoulder.

"I think I should better warn you, some of the people you meet here may be a little... eccentric. Just don't piss off Rivaille and you should be fine."

"Eccentr- ahhh." Rico's descension became stronger and faster as we headed into the fog dome.  _It's how we stay hidden_  Armin said through my mind. The dome was so thick that I couldn't breathe when we entered it. If we hadn't been going so fast I doubt we would've made it through the dense air. The choking feeling was immediately gone as soon as we entered the dome and so was the mystery of what the wondrous place called Utgard looked like from the outside. At least, that's what I presumed to be this hideout, science-fiction looking place to be.

The man holding Armin let out a Titan call. What laid below was a long concrete runway, littered with white markings and candle lit posts running along either side. Attached to the runway was a solid metal semi-spherical complex, complete with lookouts, wind flags, telescopes, various wires coming out from place to place and above all people. They had at least two people standing guard armed with deadly looking firearms at each lookout, their own BA's clearly visible at their side. Others were standing either side of the runway engaging in normal conversation and weapon combat practise. The runway was elevated so that it was the same level as the lookouts that surrounded the complex which made me wonder how big this place really was

The winged Titans raised themselves vertical as they came to the impact zone of the runway, gently fluttering down, placing us back on the ground. Rico waved goodbye to me almost as soon as she touched down.

"It was great meeting you Eren." She called as she followed her two other colleagues into the building.

"Wait, Rico!" She turned in midair, "What was it that you tried to do to me that didn't work?"

She gave me a smile and stated, "My Individual Titan Specialty is mind-reading. I couldn't see anything in that head of yours. But like I said, I'm a bit rusty, I'll see you around." She continued to fly with the other Titans, heading through the entrance into the large dome building.

The surrounding Titans stopped their activities immediately, their stares locked on us five. Uncomfortability was challenging me to surrender back to where I came from but I had to remember, that all of these people were once human like me. I wasn't sure whether it was just the fact that all five of us were here now or if the new Vulgaris had just come to town and outsiders weren't accepted but they all looked like they had just seen a ghost. I assumed option two. But yet at the same time, some turned around to the friends whispering loudly phrases like 'Is that the Shadowstrike?', 'I thought he was dead?', 'So Armin really is working with the Vulgaris'.

Armin gestured the four of us to follow him, telling us not to look at the judgemental eyes that followed us down the runway.

"It only feeds their need to gossip." I couldn't help but glance at the unfamiliar faces. Most of them were the deviant Titans, but some winged ones were scattered throughout the few that were there. Before I had a chance to register a strong wind was pushing me back, aggressive flapping approaching closer and closer to my side.

"EREN LOOK OUT!" Armin called out. But a strong force had already pushed me down to the ground. A curtain of black blocking out the light from above me, a large iron-handled scythe pushing my throat and neck further into the concrete ground. I gripped both hands around the long handle of the weapon, attempting to pry it off my body. But this force was strong, this person had one foot crushing my chest in, leaning down to face me head on. Opening my eyes, I identified this being as male, his emotionless yet terrifying demeanour making my bones quiver.

"Who are you?" The deep-voiced man said calmly, not yet easing off with the weapon at my neck. The black curtain I found happened to be incredibly soft, almost unable to sense through its silkiness as the wing brushed pass past my cheek. Another winged Titan, this time one with ebony black wings was the type holding me down.

"Stop! That's Eren!" Armin demanded from behind him. The black-winged Titan's eyes widened and backed off slowly, revealing his chiseled, muscular body and black martial art's pants and shoes like the other male winged was wearing. His scowl remained, his eyebrows still furrowed as he looked down at me on the ground. I quickly stood up with the aid of Krista and brushed myself off.

"He's a Vulgaris Rivaille. The one they want." Krista explained.

No way. It couldn't be. He was dead. The government had him killed. But there was no denying it. That fiendish scowl. That black undercut hair that passed over his thin furrowed eyebrows that contrasted with his storm-cloud like eyes. His incredible short yet wiry appearance that didn't seem to match his reputation for being a cold-blooded merciless assassin. The name's were so similar as well.

This was Rivaille. As in  _the_  Levi Ackerman. The notorious, murderer responsible for the organised killing of hundreds? He was a Titan, and he was definitely alive and had a deadly looking scythe in his hand along with the power of a thousand eagles in his dark menacing wings.

"I'm very sorry for scaring you Eren. I didn't realise you were... normal." He said in that same calm yet terrifying, emotionless tone. Jean had collapsed to the floor in a fit of laughter at my fear in this man. This to no surprise set the Levi or Rivaille off, making him plunge the hilt of his weapon into his stomach, telling him to shut up. The grunt that came from Jean made me jump. The dark-winged Titan turned to me, giving me an evil sneer.

"Welcome to Utgard. Eren."

 

\---

 

**"WHAT! He's here and you didn't tell me! I need to go see him!"**

_"Wait, Hanji, you still haven't answered my question!"_

**"I'm sorry, Rico, but I honestly don't know why you couldn't look into Eren's mind. Can you see mine now?"**

_"Yes, vividly. That's how I know you really want to go see the Vulgaris or you might break something from over excitement."_

**"Good, well I'M OFF. I will do a blood test when I get back if that will help."**

_"Thanks Hanji, that would be great."_

**"That's if... It doesn't have something to do with Eren."**

_"What was that?_ "

**"Oh nothing, see you later."**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Rico (Italic)  
> Hanji (Bold)


	21. Dark Wings

Levi Ackerman. Probably the worst you could get when it came to criminals. He and his two partners who were never able to be identified, were the most feared trio in all of Shingeki. So feared that they had adopted the name of the 'Underground Thug Trio'. Never once had they ever been caught in the act, but people knew it was them due to a signature trademark they left at all the sights of their kills. A branding with the initials 'AMC' on the necks of their victims. They always worked at night and only people who were part of the mafia or any 'underground' companies knew them. Hence, how they got their name.

They had been responsible for the disappearance of so many high-ranking CEOs, mafia bosses, even military officers. They didn't care who it was as long as the pay was good. You got on Levi's bad side, you and your whole family would pay the price with your life. They always knew who would exploit them. Thier intelligence and ability at thinking swiftly always earned them the upper hand and respect of other criminals in the area. They were so smart infact that they were always at least twenty steps ahead of the Police Force, already hacking into the facial recognition chamber, already deleting their fingerprint scans so they wouldn't be found. It wouldn't of mattered what they did, because they had deleted their full profile from official government records. They had may as well of been dead. Everyone thought they were.

Someone had betrayed them though. The media got it all on tape, the death of Levi Ackerman, the fleeing of his two followers, only being able to see a tall man and a teenage girl sprinting over a cliff edge, jumping into sharp rocky waters down the bottom. It was broadcast throughout the nation about the death of the 'Underground Thug Trio' and how the streets of Shingeki were finally safe. Armin was shocked when it came on the news. He was the only person I knew that saw the good in them. He had become so obsessed with them, looking into everything he possibly could about them. He was almost able to find a name for the other two but then they were gone. The reason I knew all this information about them was because of Armin's obsession.

But apparently, Levi's death had all just been a hoax. Now looking back, it had only been a few weeks before Armin was taken that he was reported dead. Perhaps his plan all along had been to come here and start this. But that didn't seem like something an assassin would do. Unless he really did want to start a new life. His new life as Rivaille. According to Ymir, if you dared accidentally called him Levi, he would very likely break your bones. Last time someone called him Levi, they were flung across the entire Utgard complex, creating a perfect silhouette through the metal walls. It had taken two weeks to repair the hole.

He was unlike anything I had ever imagined though. He was blurred in the tape so no one was able to see him but I still had a general idea of who this mastermind group looked like. Levi... or Rivaille I imagined to be a tall bulky man, long hair slicked back into a ponytail, armed with multitudes of firearms and coated with piercings and tattoos. Although he did have the sinister look and expressionless attitude I expected he was short in stature and wiry instead of bulky. His dead straight ebony hair matched the colour of his elegant yet rugged looking wings that dragged on the floor behind him. The only weapon that the man had was his death glare that could murder whole towns and his scythe that was about the same height as me, making him look even tinier.

As we entered the semicircular passage way into Utgard he retracted his weapon so it was the size of a small pocket knife and clipped it to the belt of his martial art pants next to his illuminated BA. The dome building was massive and that was only the entrance. I walked up to the iron railings and looked over the edge. It was crazy. Titans everywhere. A mixture of winged and deviants grunting and calling as they fought each other with a multitude of weapons. All those fighting were in black as their blades clashed sending sparks and blurs of dark across the cement arena. One pair of winged Titans came up to the top level where we were and were hurling throwing knives and ninja stars as the another picked up a small girl with red pigtails, flinging her towards the attacker.

The girl cried out what sounded like an aggressive tiger growl, swinging her kusarigama toward the attackers wings, making him spin out of control and crash down on the ground. She brought the weapon back and swung it up to the bars on the roof. She hung suspended up there, laughing and taunting the winged titan.

"Haha, C'mon now you can do better than that!" She called out.

"ISABEL! GET DOWN FROM THERE!" Rivaille yelled to the Titan chandelier. She seemed surprised at his voice and immediately used her obvious acrobatic ability to flip and somersault her way over to us.

She landed with her body crouched and her head down. But that was all I needed to take my first glimpse at the new breed of titan that I had only heard about from Krista. Her pointed furry ears that matched the colour of her bright red hair, the long slinked tail that swished from side to side and came vertically up as she did also. The two pointed teeth that only just poked out of her adoring smile when she looked our way. The soft padded paws that felt like fleece cushions as her hands cupped my face and twisted my head head side to side. It was one of the clawed titans.

It was strange for my eyes to adjust to human form without ears on the sides of the head but pointed cat-like ones at the top, but then again, I think the glowing purple eyes and wings that are attached to the body top the list of 'strange for my eyes to adjust'.

"You two look alike." Armin chuckled from behind me. Isabel's attention immediately shifted to him. Pouncing over the top of me, she embraced Armin in a hug, tail wrapping around his body also. Her ears perked up as she bombarded Armin with questions like 'where have you been?' 'Why did you leave?' And some other questions that were spoken too fast that I wasn't able to hear them.

"Yes, I would very much like to know that as well, Armin." Rivaille said nonchalantly. His arms were crossed and his wings parted aggressively. Jean, Ymir and Krista began to back-off, gradually moving closer and closer away from the group and from Rivaille's scowl.

"Awww c'mon big bro, it's not like he would leave for no good reason." Isabel whined while tugging on Rivaille's wings causing him to grunt. She then turned to Armin, ears dropped eyes wide showing off the emerald green colour in them. "Right?"

Armin didn't answer, only looking away. Rivaille made a tch noise before a taller blond haired man walked in between Isabel and Rivaille.

"Don't be so harsh Rivaille, I'm sure he will tell us why. Cut him some slack, who knows what he's been through." The man said with a smile. He held a short sword in one of his hands with a shield poking out from behind his shoulders. One look at the three and you could tell that they had been through so much together. They complemented each other so well. You could see just from their body language that they were more than comfortable around one another. Those two had to be the tall man and the teenage girl that was with Rivaille back then. How on earth could they have all survived?

There was a clunk of footseps on iron floor panels as Rivaille walked slowly past me, toward Armin, hovering slightly to tower over him, his arms still crossed.

"Rivaille we talked about this, he can do what he-" The taller man was cut off by Rivaille's hand motion of a simple wave toward the centre of the arena. Not once did Armin buckle or break a sweat from Rivaille's terrifyingly close proximity to him. They both looked like they were ready to take each other on. I wondered who would win.

Krista slowly leaped over to me with grace, tugging on my sleeve away from the two.

"Krista." Rivaille calmy said without moving his gaze away from Armin who was still staring in defiance. She responded unconfidently with a slight yelp sound.

"Take Jean and Ymir to the board room, Farlan and Isabel can show Eren around. I need updates on the current situations we are in. Something tells me it's more dire than we thought. Armin, I expect no stone to be left unturned." Armin said nothing. He turned slowly and started walking calmly toward this so called 'board room'. Krista gave me a look of sympathy and ushered me towards where Isabel and Farlan were waiting.

 

\---

 

"Don't worry this place isn't as big as it looks." Isabel exclaimed as she grasped my arm with her paws and pulled me rather forcefully in between Farlan and herself. Farlan ran his hands over the BA attached to his belt, making his sword and shield disappear while Isabel did the same for her unique choice of a kusarigama. We walked the opposite way around the spherical arena away from Armin and the others passing by various wooden crates, punching bags and dummies and a metal door that required a key card to unlock as I saw a someone enter.

"That's especially for the Survey Corps, the elite squad of Utgard. Not allowed to enter there without approval." Farlan explained.

"What's in there?" Farlan began to tell me but was barely able to utter a breath before Isabel made it clear that she was more than happy to tell me.

"It's a realistic training facility program. Hanji, and Armin created it. It delivers realistic holographic imagery to replicate an event that could occur against either the Military Police or Garrison Regiment. It's actually reeeeeally difficult." Farlan rolled her eyes at her exaggeration. This sounded like a really complex system. Did Armin really create a program like that?

We continued along the edge of the elevated floor. I couldn't help but look down at the speed and brutality some of the Titan's showed in their training. Lots of them were bloodied up and bruised really bad but they still kept going through the pain.  _If you can't fight, you can't win._  That's what my Mother said I would say when I was little and would get into fights at school. I would come home with black eyes and sprained wrists and that's all I would say. For some reason that popped into my head as we came down the spiral staircase to the level of these training Titans.

This place seemed like a giant spherical maze. The training area was the biggest room in the whole complex I was told, as it also held the weapon racks and repair booth. I got some funny looks as Isabel explained what this building used to be before it became Utgard. I was only half listening though. Something or rather someone was making me feel anxious. A blond girl armed with two nunchucks and deadly blue eyes was staring me down from across the room. Another Titan who I noticed was one of the clawed had to whip her with her tail to stop her from staring. It wasn't a pleasant stare, it was one that looked as though she had a major problem with me.

"Don't worry about her. That's just Annie. She doesn't take well to newcomers." Farlan said. I nodded and looked over my shoulder to see she was still fighting the clawed Titan with ease but her eyes were still locked on me. Isabel snapped me back to life showing me down a hallway that split into three sections.

"Left is girls, right is boys, middle is everything else." She politely said.

"Everything else?"

"Yup, here look." She grabbed my arm again and started running down the middle hall. The walls were made from the same iron material as the panels on the second level which made me question the security of this facility. Not invasion wise but environmentally wise. As we came out of the hall I was greeted with a lot more Titans, these ones not nearly as aggressive looking as the ones in the training facility. These one's looked more... normal.

They were engaging in normal conversation, not wearing nearly as threatening attire as the others. They all had casual clothing on, excluding the winged Titans. Ages varied from fifteen to forty. They sat on couches, played pool while drinking some form of alcohol and laughed at their own jokes and weird dances. The only thing that set them apart from my normal reality was the wings, tails and claws. One of the younger ones actually threw another up to the iron staircase at the back that led to another keycard protected door. He didn't seemed phased as he bared his wings and started chasing him around the complex to below that staircase where an arch opening with a red cross above it indicated an infirmary. To the left and right there were also archways that led to the girls and boys dorms that Isabel was talking about.

The sounds of chattering, pool balls clicking and others laughing gave me a sense of comfortability which I was so ecstatic to be feeling. But something had been bugging me. Something I was afraid to ask but would've eaten me inside-out if I didn't. I swallowed hard and picked up my courage, clenching my winged necklace subconsciously in my palm.

"You guys were part of the Underground Thug Trio, weren't you?" They stared at each other in shock. Isabel's bubbly attitude switching to one of gentleness.

"It's amazing you were able to pick up on that. Not many are able to sense it right away. Armin was right to trust you." She placed a paw on my shoulder and started leading me back to the training arena, her claw slightly grazing my collarbone.

"You have to know Eren, that what we did then was in the past. We had our reasons for doing what we did just like you have your reasons for why you are here though you are not a Titan." Farlan continued. I understood completely. Armin was right about them from the start. If only people weren't so scared of what they didn't know, then maybe we would be able to live in relative harmony.

"Armin trusts you Eren, so we trust you. You may not be a Titan directly and don't get me wrong we don't want to do anything like that to you. But you are one of us now, Rivaille won't be able to see it for a while, but he will come around." I smiled at both of their genuinity and thanked them for showing me around. I told them I would go and look around a bit myself for a while but was interrupted by a heavy mass straddling me down to the ground.

"Well aren't you adorable, Oooooooh and a Vulgaris too" The source of the mass exclaimed rather loudly. She had huge steampunk-like goggles mixed with a crazy look in her eyes. The pointed-cat ears and the sharp feline fangs proved that she was another one of the clawed and another one of the 'eccentric' type Titan's I was told about. I laughed at the enthusiasm this woman showed in me, so did Isabel and Farlan as they announced "Hanji, you're going to suffocate him." I loved the people here already and the kindness these new people had shown to me, excluding Rivaille and that blonde, Annie. Maybe, if I just avoided them, it wouldn't be so bad here after all.

 

\---

 

**"Did you atleast get what you were looking for?"**

_"Well... Not entirely, but I'm close to-"_

**"Not entirely huh? What was the point of you leaving here for six months if all you have to show have is 'not entirely'"**

_"Look, I did the best I can, I still got heaps of documents I can analyse and exploited a lot of the people who were involved in-"_

**"That doesn't mean jack shit Armin. Do you have a name or not!?"**

_"....I-"_

"Hey, aren't you being a little harsh, he was being pursued half the time. It would be a bit difficult to-"

**"Yea I heard. The Shadowstrike is the hottest topic right at the moment."**

_"DON'T CALL ME THAT!"_

**"Once you give me a reason not to, then _maybe_  I won't."**

"One day, you two are going to claw each other's eyes out."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Armin (Italic)  
> Rivaille (Bold)  
> Jean (Underline)


	22. Cause and Effect

Time was but a foreign concept to me. It didn't matter if it had been days, months or even years. He was gone and there was nothing I could do to change that. I was so weak. So tainted by the fear of this never-ending unknown, that I never stopped to think how my actions could have affected others. It seemed like a good idea at the time. Everyone tried to tell me it would be okay, tried to give me time to grieve over Armin's passing. But I never believed he was really gone. How could you grieve over someone who wasn't dead?

I was never in a state of grief, I was in a state of false hope. Hope that when I came home from school and put my bag down next to the doorframe like I always did, Armin would be waiting there. He would be standing in that hallway, hair styled into that neat little bob cut he always had with the biggest smile that made his eyes gleam like the ocean at dawn. But that hope eventually turned to sorrow, and sorrow into defeat. I had become so forlorn at the memory that the thought of letting my pain drip down the bathroom sink seemed like my gateway to freedom.

But no matter how much it hurt, no matter how many scars I caused across my flesh, it was never enough to drain out the memory of him completely. I was cursed with pale skin, a fragile body and a fragile mind. The amount of blood I lost within those few months did wonders for the psychologists pockets. Not that I ever went. Not that I ever cared. I went once, I hated it. Those words she spoke  _"You have a problem, and I am here to try and fix it."_  I never thought of sadness as a problem. I never thought that caring about someone so much that the thought of losing him makes you want to jump off a building as something to be ashamed of. Not until she had said that.

I hated myself. Not only did I lose my best friend but I had lost my soulmate, my sense of normality, my smile, my laugh, my everything. I had a 'mental illness'. I was a patient, no longer a person. The labels became endless. Paranoia, depression, anxiety, suicidal. It all meant nothing. I just wanted out. I wanted to see him again. I had to see him again.

I ignored my friends for those few months I had become a 'patient'. Mikasa was the only one who really persisted. She knew the only person who could get to me was Connie. He on Mikasa's orders came to my house everyday for the seven months after Armin was taken. He was good at distracting me. It felt good to be around him. But that happiness could only last for so long. It was reaching two hundred and seventy days since Armin's kidnapping when I finally made the decision.

To my friends, I was at home. To my mother, I was at the library. Where I really was, heading down town. To the tallest isolated building I knew. Twenty stories high. Towering over the city of Trost, yet no one had used the building in years.

My mind was blurred, the thought of forever being unhappy clogging everything sane in my mind. The tedious trek up the staircase to the top of the tower gave me plenty of time to think. Armin had to be gone by now. It was nearly nine months since he was in the hands of those perverts, there was no way that he could still be alive. And if he was still alive, from the looks of what those men intended, he may have been better off dead.

Why couldn't they have just taken me? Why did he have to sacrifice himself like that? It may of seemed selfish to say that I wish we could swap places, put him through the pain I was going through. But he was strong, he would of gotten through it. I wasn't even strong enough to protect my best friend from the grasp of those men. I was useless. The world wouldn't miss me. No one needed me. I had no reason to go on.

When I came to the door to the rooftop, I hesitated. It was only for a second but that little glimmer of hope peeked out from the sorrow that had built its border. That hope disappeared just as quickly as it came as images of Armin's body getting thrown against the wall and tossed into that van shadowed my thoughts. A blast of cool wind shot me through the darkness when that door to the roof opened. Blurs of blue, red and white littered the busy town of Trost below. Sirens blared and tires screeched. It was peaceful here out of reach from the noise.

Looking up at the stars, I could see Armin's favourite constellation. Taurus. A being so mighty and powerful yet was ruled by the thoughts of beauty, love and harmony. The need for stability and the desire for loyalty giving it strong instincts and a persevering nature. It was something so simple yet so complex. It was Armin wrapped up in a set of stars. I wondered if he could see me up there.

"Armin, if you can hear me please give me a sign that you are okay. That you are waiting for me up there." I said to myself. I clenched my hands together and waited. Something, anything would of worked.

 _Eren, please don't do this._ The voice echoed in my ears as if it was spoken from right behind me. I turned to every direction but there was nothing there. That was another thing I could add to the list of how I was a 'patient'. Hearing Armin's voice in my head as if he was right next to me.  _Please Eren, I need you. You can't do this._ No, it wasn't him. It was my imagination. And I intended to put a stop to it. If he really needed me, this was the only way. I raised a foot onto the ledge in front of me and pushed myself up so that the tips of my shoes were dangling two hundred feet above the ground.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath in. This was it. I would finally see him again. My foot was just over the edge before something tight wrapped around my body, pulling me to the ground. It felt wet against my back. A high pitched gasp for air muffled itself into that patch. Opening my eyes, there stood a sweat-covered Connie, who slowly pulled me back down to the ground. I hadn't even realised the tears that was stinging my eyes until he turned me around to his, bloodshot and dilated. I collapsed to the ground, still in a daze and not fully aware of how I got to be where I was.

I could hear my name repeated over and over by Connie but nothing was registering. Instead I did the one thing that I had been holding back since that day. I let it out. All the anger, all the suffering, everything that had been contained inside was burst out in an excruciating wail of bottled up agony. I buried myself into Connie's chest, gripping his shirt to keep myself from falling into his lap. He patted my back softly, not uttering a word.

Finally when I had calmed down to the point of uncontrollable sobs, Connie stopped his silent comfort. I had no idea how he found me or how he was able to get here in time but I was glad he did. Because of my tainted fear of unhappiness I didn't realise the amount of casualties that would of come out of my passing. The amount of people that would've gone through what I was going through. That wasn't the worst part I came to realise. If I had gone, those memories I had of Armin. The one's of when we met, of when we would go camping, those brief yet wonderful intimate moments that only he and I shared would cease to exist. Forever.

"Eren Jaeger, don't ever try and do that again. You can get through this. We will get through this." Connie cooed in my ear. It was in that moment that I made a promise. It was the first time I made one since I promised to protect him when we first became friends with Armin. I would continue to live. I would continue on with my life for his sake. For our sake. I would preserve those treasured moments forever. I would continue to believe he was alive because as long as I still had that hope, I could protect him. It didn't matter that the police had given up, I hadn't. I would bring him home. I would eliminate any threat that stands in our way and bring back our happiness.

 

\---

 

"Just hold out your arm, it will only hurt for a second." Hanji purred as she stuck the empty syringe into the side of my arm. I kept my attention focused on the surroundings of the infirmary, attempting to drown out some of the sting that came with the needle. Unlike the rest of Utgard, this place was blindingly white. The walls weren't a rough metal but a painted concrete. Each cot had a machine at the bedhead with glowing green and red lights that showed various numbers that I assumed were blood pressure or heart rates of the unconscious bodies laying there. I had become so engrossed in the Titan's fast healing processes that I didn't even realise Hanji was able to get a full litre of my blood without me making a sound.

"Thanks for cooperating with me on such short notice Eren. I'm sorry about jumping on you before though, are you okay?"

"Yea, I'm okay. Just a little startled was all." She pulled out three glass vials from under her lab coat, placing them inside a tube rack at the bedside table. I watched as my blood left the large syringe and poured smoothly into the three vials. The numbness in my arm caused me to dangle my legs over the side of the bed while adjusting myself. I made a slight groan of annoyance, causing Hanji to stop what she was doing and turn to me.

After placing a cover in all three tubes, Hanji walked back over to me at the edge of the bed with a bandage. She brought her head closer to my arm, and quickly stroked her scratchy tongue over where she had inserted the needle. I instantly jolted back but she had insisted Clawed Titan saliva had healing properties and then proceeded to wrap the patch with the linen.

"Hey Hanji?"

"Hm?" She replied with as she tied up the loose strings of the bandage.

"I was just wondering, what... exactly are you going to do with those?" I inquired pointing to the three sealed vials. She suddenly had a gleam of excitement in her eyes, ears perking up as her gaze did.

"It's a machine I created. It tracks anyone whose inserted their DNA anywhere in the world. I can know where you are exactly at all times. It's only for safety precautions, everyone does it the moment they come here." There was something missing, and I knew exactly what it was. It wasn't that I was disappointed with her answer. It was probably the most logical one I've heard in awhile. I left one foot dangling while clenching the other to my chest, leaning my head on my knee with a yawn.

"But that's not what you want to know, is it Eren?" I stared up at Hanji in confusion, as she placed both paws on her hips. "You want to know, how on Earth did beings like us get created and why?" This woman was a genius.

"How did you-"

"Curiosity overwhelms you Eren, I can feel it pouring out of those gorgeous eyes of yours. Clawed Titans have a sixth sense you know. We may want to know what happened to us but you  _seek_  it." She interrupted. I clenched my knee closer to my chest, feeling somewhat exposed to the person next to me at her ease at picking up my earning so quickly.

"To put it simply, DNA splicing," She started. "Each one of our DNA structures were genetically-altered. Titans like me and Rivaille were paired with original animal nucleotides. The deviants like Armin and Jean, we don't know. The DNA sequence is too complex for me to decipher. This cross-sequencing of DNA however caused immediate memory loss in all of us, which is why none of us can remember who did this to us or where we were originally transformed. But whatever it was that caused this, it responded differently to everyone's DNA." A horrible ache dulled my ability to take a lot of this in. It was either the amount of science I was trying to put together or the effects of blood loss, but either way, I felt I was about to pass out. Hanji snapped me back up with a leap onto the ground. She scurried over to the opposite side of the infirmary, tail swinging behind her. Various pitched beeps along with a clunk of a metal door could be heard but Hanji was blocking the view. When she turned back around a vial of a familiar looking liquid was in her hands. That same thick translucent substance that was held at my neck that made Armin stop in his tracks.

"The one thing we were able to do though, was find out that it was an experiment that created us. This serum is supposed to be an exact replica of the Titan Serum that casued this Titan Curse. It turns you into a Titan but most don't last long, and those who do..." A violent growl had replaced her words. Before I could even utter a word, she had rushed over to the safe where she got the serum, placed it back and had her paw in front of me. She ordered me to get behind me and I willingly obliged. That growl didn't sound human.

Extending her razor sharp claws, she grabbed a knife from inside her coat with her tail and held it to the side of her. It shone in the fluorescent white light. The walls shuddered in fear as the aggressive snarls that came from outside grew louder and louder, closer and closer.

"Look Eren, we don't know exactly who created us or why." Her normal bubbly voice had changed to something sinister. A voice of pure focus and determination.

"But whoever did, did not have the intention of creating peace. He wanted to create a super human, no not even human..." She had stopped mid sentence for something or rather someone had emerged from the infirmary doorway. A humanoid figure with violet glowing eyes and sharp fangs protruding out of his bestial mouth.

"A monster, with the instinct to kill."

The man's growl grew louder with each breath he took. Hanji progressively walked closer to the possessed man, changing her tone to a more soothing one.

"Thomas, this isn't you. Don't let the animal takeover who you really are." He was trying to escape himself. He twitched and fidgeted attempting to break away from his monstrous state but the animal inside had hoisted him above any means of returning to the stabilising ground. Thick red began trickling from the bottom of his glowing eyes, seeping onto his bare chest. Above where the blood had spilled, sat a dark marking on his shoulder in the shape of an 'S' over a diamond with claw-like marks surrounding it, that started to glow in the same way as his eyes. I had seen this phase before. I had seen that very same marking before.

 

_"What's that on your back?" It had an 'S' shape in the middle of a square-diamond surrounded by dark claw scratches... "Oh, that's um... that's the Titan symbol. I don't remember when I got it, only that one day it was there after I had escaped that lab. Every Titan has one, it's like the creator's trademark or something, kind of dehumanising don't you think?"_

 

Thomas leapt toward Hanji with a terrifying force but was stopped nearly immediately with a syringe puncturing the glowing mark dead centre of the diamond from behind. His eyes shot back to a light brown, his muscles seizing up till he fell to the ground. He shook violently at the expressionless culprit's feet. It took me a while to register that it was the same girl who was staring me down when I was taken around Utgard. She blew her fringe to the side of her face, tossing the used needle toward Hanji and I.

"Fashionably late, as usual Annie." Hanji snickered, going back to her fun-loving voice. The blond scoffed at her remark, crouching down to pick up the unconscious victim of her attack. She lifted him with ease.

"He had been acting strange last night. I assumed the worst and watched him. It's lucky I came here when I did, otherwise he would've enjoyed a nice Vulgaris breakfast." She claimed in monotone, her piercing gaze staring me down like the runt in the pack. I looked down in shame, realising I had done nothing but fallen to the ground on my shins and flashed to the past during his phase.

"Which cell do you want me to put him in?" Annie directed to Hanji. She replied calmly 'Cell 104' and told her that she would be down there soon to run some tests. The cold-hearted girl nodded, making one last nasty glance in my direction before hoisting Thomas over her shoulder and walked out.

Hanji gave a hefty sigh as the crunch of what sounded like an apple came from her neck and knuckles. I quickly jumped to my feet.

"Hanji, what happened to him?" I squeaked, still trying to connect Thomas' crazed state to my memories. She crossed her arms and stared out the door

"Like, I was saying before Eren, we don't know why we were created who did it, only that he wanted to create something inhuman out of one. Whatever he used contained something that heightens everything, including animal instincts. This part of the serum was put into every new version whether it was a Speed Deviant, Clawed or Winged, they all have those heightened instincts of a beast." Before I even knew what was happening, Hanji had grabbed my shoulders and put her head close to mine, bringing her voice down to an discernible whisper.

"Most are able to control it but some cannot. Some don't have the strength to hold it in and completely lose it and let the furiosity take over." I closed my eyes finally able to pick up the broken pieces of where I saw that very same state Thomas was in.

 

_When I took a better look at Armin his eyes had evolved to a full neon violet. Almost a pink hue now covering the whole of his eyeballs. He was breathing rapidly and his canine teeth were pointed and sharp poking out through his infernal smile... "Armin. Please stop." I whimpered underneath him. I could no longer feel or hear his breathing and opened my eyes to reveal a scared teenage boy standing over me... "Eren... I- I'm so sorry... I di- I didn't mean to-" He brought his knees to his face and cried into his hands...._

 

"What about Armin!?" I rapidly prompted. Hanji startled back at my out-of-the-blue distress.

"Krista said he was the first. That means if he hasn't gone bad now, he wouldn't right? He had the original serum so- so the Doctor probably had something different that allowed him to control it that wasn't in the others-" A rising heat was coming back from around my neck along with my breathing becoming lost in my frantic words.

"Eren, calm down." She waited for me to compose myself. As I took a large breath she continued.

"Look Eren, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but since Armin was the first, the serum wasn't fully complete and fine-tuned."  _What does that mean?_  I internally muttered to myself.

"To put it simply the animal nucleotide mutations in his system gives little to none short-term negative effects. He won't become like Thomas, but the long-term effects of what happened to him is only going to end in something even more sev-"

"HANJI!" Immediately turning to the source of the aggressive tone, Armin stood at the doorway anger reflecting in his violet eyes that slowly turned back to blue with each heavy rise and fall of his chest and shoulders.

"Ahh, long time no see Shadowstrike." I could practically see the hatred radiating off the blonde at the name the media had given him. His eyes rolled back to his head and he breathed heavily out through his mouth.

"Do you have it?" Hanji asked, now serious again. Armin walked past, pretty much ignoring the fact I was even there. He rustled through his belt for his storage modulator, bringing out the tattered notebook I had found at Trost. Hanji's pupil's dilated as the book came into her view. Mimicking the sound of a teenage schoolgirl, she pulled down her goggles and stared intently into the roughed up leather cover.

"I've written everything I could decipher from his writings in the back pages. I couldn't understand it all but I presume you can decode it?" Hanji nodded inquisitively.

"Thankyou Armin, I know you must have gone through a lot to get it." He finally turned his eyes to me, a cool expression over his face. He crossed his arms and gestured to me.

"Thank him, he was the one that got it out for me. I'm going to go check on Annie and Thomas." The thud of his footsteps out the door clamped me down to the spot. Where did the other Armin go? This one was so... opposite.

I waved goodbye to Hanji, thanking her for everything she told me and ran after him.

"Wait! Armin!" I called out, almost tripping over my feet as I tried to catch up to him. We were halfway down the corridor to the mess hall when I had my extended arm smacked away from his shoulder.

"What!" He growled. I had never seen this side of Armin before. His teeth clenched in frustration, his brows furrowed together menacingly. The sizzling heat of my necklace instantly switched off that rage inside of him. His shoulders fell as did his head, resembling a sad puppy. Like when I felt his hatred, I could feel his regret.

"How'd the meeting go?" I asked playing coy. If he wanted to play the mysterious type, I could too. He didn't answer.

"C'mon Ar, we haven't talked since I woke up in that cave. Did something happen?" No reply again. He kept his gaze down, eventually clutching both his forearms and turning away swiftly. I really didn't want to do this again. Hate him again. I just wanted to talk to him.

"WHATS YOUR PROBLEM!" I yelled with more aggression than I had intended. He ignored me completely, continuing on his way. Away from me. I screamed his name once more, the sound bouncing off the iron walls trying to pull him back to me. I sprinted as fast I could, pinning his back against the rusted walls with a loud crash. He yelped at the sudden impact. Knowing his strength, he could've easily thrown me through these walls so I had to act fast.

"I'M TIRED OF PLAYING THESE GUESSING GAMES! WHY CAN'T WE BE LIKE WHERE WE WERE BEFORE!?"

His eyes glinted as I moved my face closer towards him to whisper, "You're not the only one who wants to protect people you know."

The halls were deserted, not a sign of anyone coming anytime soon. Our faces were so close I could feel his hot breath on my cheek. My body had moved closer to his so I could hear the pump of his heart racing in sync with mine. My mind no longer had control of my actions. Removing one of my hands from Armin's shoulder I gently moved it towards his cheek. His breathing became fast as I glared down to the subtle lick of his bottom lip.

"Annie's waiting for me." He whimpered as my lips came only inches away from his. He slinked out from my hold and pushed me away gently. His fast pace walk had increased into a speedy jog as he turned the corner out of sight toward the mess hall. I leant up against the wall, sinking down along the cold iron. My heart beat fast but I wasn't afraid. My palms were sweaty but those butterflies inside gave me the feeling that was far from any nightmare. But maybe the nightmare had bypassed me, because something was triggered in Armin. I swear I saw fear.

 

\---

 

**"How's Thomas doing?"**

_"Not good, we will probably have to euthanise him. You okay Armin? You look a little pale?"_

**"I'm fine Annie, it's just a little overwhelming."**

_"There's been more since you left. We are down around forty just from them taking demon form."_

**"Any scouts?"**

_"Not unlesswe include you?"_

**"What's that supposed to mean?"**

_"Hanji's readings indicate ever since you came into contact with that Vulgaris, you've gotten worse."_

**"I'm FINE Annie. Leave Eren out of this"**

"I'm afraid we can't do that."

**"Hanji? How long have you been standing there?"**

"Doesn't matter, what does matter is that I have just completed Eren's DNA analysis."

_"And?"_

"You two may want to take a look at it. Armin, I don't think you're going to like it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Annie (Italics)  
> Armin (Bold)  
> Hanji (Underline)


	23. My Unease Grows

The light flickered above me, buzzing manically. Time passes so quickly when your mind wanders. As I sat there in the iron corridor, not knowing where to go after Armin had bolted, I had thought back to when I first saw Armin as the Shadowstrike. The bravery he had shown, the intensity he had, the passion to protect. Those men were twice the size of him and he took them out with ease. At the time I had no idea they were Titans but he had still shown that he was more than capable of taking care of himself.

I wanted to be like that. I wanted to be like him. I always had. Even while were in school, he addressed every aspect as an opportunity to learn no matter how ridiculous the task was. He turned a blind eye to people who were interested in him. 'No one in their right mind truly likes me in that way, I would just end up being a burden', he would say every time I would tell him that a group of girls were looking at him across the halls. He was quite the charmer, yet his studies and his friends came first. All he wanted was to go to University and become a Doctor in medicine in health.

It turned into a great fear of mine. The thought that after the HSC we would never see each other again. I wanted to get into the same sort of science type stuff as him but my marks never cut it. Armin tutored me in it as much as he could but IT and Software Engineering wasn't really something he was interested in. Unless he was and never told me, seeing as he helped built that mysterious program on the second floor. I wondered what sort of simulations that room could conjure up. A forest of bandits, a mansion of snipers, maybe even a clock tower of assassins.

As if answering my call, the heavy ticking of footsteps on the iron floors echoed toward me. It was an odd pattern of sounds for a normal run, more of a gallop then a jog. I pushed myself up from the wall ready to confront the panting person. The source emerged from around the corner, sliding hard into the wall creating a loud crash as she banged her head and fell to the ground. She clutched her red hair gently, rubbing behind her ears to soothe the pain. Her Clawed titan fangs only just poking out of her breathless gasping for air.

"Oh, Eren there you are!" Isabel ran quickly to my arm, tugging it with the same speed from where she came from. "Rivaille's ready for you." She power walked in long strides, still massaging her scalp with her free hand.

Confusion hesitated me back. "Wait, ready for what?" She gripped my arm tighter as we emerged into the mess hall, still moving swiftly, maneuvering around the other numerous Titans who were heading in the same direction as us.

"Oh, you will see." Was what she came back with. She continued to lead me until we had made it to the training quarters. Unlike before, the floor was deserted, the large expanse of people now surrounding the walls of the room in a spherical fashion. All thier eyes pointed at me as Isabel pushed me further into the centre of the floor. A hot flush of red covered my cheeks as well as butterflies flying up and down my throat and stomach. That only heightened when I looked up and saw even more eyes glued to me from the above lookout.

I recognised Ymir holding Krista from behind on that top level, Jean and Farlan leaning up against the railings next to them. As I continued surveying the top level, a blur of black and red swung with a metal chain next to the dark winged man. Rivaille looked down at Isabel's gesture and rolled his eyes when she put her chained weapon back, slowly hovering his way down to the floor.

"Sorry for springing this on you on such short notice Eren," He starts. "But it is imperative that we find out your abilities sooner rather than later." In the corner of my eye, Armin and that other girl Annie, slowly walked up next to Jean tapping him on the shoulder lightly. He and Armin exchanged quiet conversation, Jean's eyes widened.

"My abilities sir?" I asked, trying to let the heat from my cheeks settle, while at the same time trying to decode what was happening on that top level. The many eyes that were still on me no longer bugged me like it did at first.

"I have recently been informed by Armin, that you may be of some use to the Scouts. I would like to test that." He turned on the balls of his feet, his arms remaining crossed over his chest. His wings parted from behind, exposing the exact same Diamond 'S' crest at the small of his back that was on Armin and Thomas.

When he turned back around he had a sinister expression on his face. "KIRSCHTEIN." He announced.

"Sir!" The Titan leapt over the railing landing solidly on the concrete ground. Immediately going into a salute stance, right fist clenched over his heart. "State your Status to the Vulgaris" Jean cocked a grin in my direction, pulling off his hood from around his neck and chucking it to the side. Running his hand over the illuminated panel on his belt, he materialised his two daggers into his hands.

"Stealth Deviant, Titan Ability - Swift Agility." His knuckles lost it's colour from how firm he was gripping his weapons as he moved into a guarding stance. " _Pull your BA out dumb ass_ " Armin chimed to me through his mind. Looking up I saw that the five were all smiling, all except Armin whose thoughts I couldn't read from his facials. Listening to the sarcastic voice I ran my hand gently over the tablet on my belt, the light metal landing into my hands. I grasped it firmly holding it defensively in front of my body.

"Eren, this is your target." Rivaille claimed, pointing toward the eager boy. "Don't let it get you." The moment the last vowel sounded, Jean had seized at the opportunity and had advanced toward me. I stumbled back, nearly losing my footings as I dodged the overhead slash from his blade. Rolling back up to a stand, I stood guard once more. That slice wasn't meant for display, he was aiming for my throat. Whatever this 'test' was, it wasn't just to test my ability to fight, it was to test my ability to survive.  _You can't win if you don't fight. You must fight to stay alive._  My mother's words played in my head as if it was really from my father as she had said they were.

But he was a Titan. Sure I had beaten Titans before, but I had always had help, Jean's in many of those occasions. He had saved me from Reiner when we first met, and from what I could see, he was using that same tenacity as he used against him on me. For a second, I panicked, the dim light from my necklace giving off that. I choked down that fear though. If Armin believed I was worthy of being a 'Scout', then I would pass this test.  _Armin._  Why did he leave so abruptly before outside the infirmary? If I was truly scaring him, he could of easily thrown me off of him.

The image of Armin's dilated pupils and quivering lips distracted me, causing me to react too late to a powerful turning kick to my stomach. I felt myself flying across the ground, landing with a heavy thud at Rivaille's feet, winded. The force of his shin knocked out all the breath in me.  _That will leave a bruise,_  I thought as I clenched my stomach. The slightest ' tch' of annoyance snaps me out of myself-wallowing, allowing me to stand up and regrasp the Katana that flew out of my hands. I cringe as I go to pick it up, the burn of my gut making me collapse once more. " _Adapt Eren..."_ Armin called to me through my mind. This time I didn't look up, I knew exactly what I had to do.

I swallow the pain, the flickering burn across my nerves licking at the skin, attempting to coax me into giving up. But I wasn't done yet. I held the Katana in front of me just like I had before, only this time, with a lot more confidence. Jean chuckles at my change of attitude. Then, out of nowhere, he vanishes. I could hear the pounding of his footsteps but he was nowhere to be seen. I peered around in every direction, until I gazed up to feel a rush of wind coming down on me. I side-stepped out of the way as the Titan landed - revealing himself once more.

Taking this as an opportunity to attack, I swing my blade across his chest, the sharp metal edge slicing at the tendons of his shoulder. He cries out, grasping his arm in defence, daggers still in hand. I am taken back by how deep I had made the wound, blood trickling down in mass spills. Only moments before I was about to express my concern, does he reveal his bluff, releasing his fake pain and straddling me down to the ground, one dagger to my neck, one above his head. It at a time like this to be reminded of the nightmare I once had, where Armin had done the very same thing. Unlike Armin, Jean's composure remained non-demonic, his eyes and features remaining their natural colour. I fear he will not hold back his overhead strike and tense. Nothing happens. He hesitates, as if something had just sounded in his mind to stop.

 _Perfect._  I roll my hips swiftly, distributing his weight off of me onto the ground. I handspring back to a guarding stance and wait for him to rise to his feet. Once he did, it was game one. I charged toward the Titan, going for a downward strike to the shoulder I had missed before. Her curses as he suppresses it with an X-block, knocking me back. Going after him again, this time we knock blades. He is extremely fast, side stepping at every angle to get the advantage on me but my Katana and his daggers were insistent on the metal clashing together, sending sparks into the air.

Jean's face turns from anger to frustration as he strikes fast and faster all around my body. Dizziness overcomes me from the constant twisting of my body to avoid his attacks. Sensing my fatigue he somersaults over me, the thud of his landing behind me signalling he was attacking from behind. Instead of turning around, I rolled forward, pushing both of my legs straight into his charging body. He lets out a grunt of pain, wrapping an arm around his sternum like I had done to mine. Feeling like I have won, I stand up ready to confront him. Out of nowhere, his pain ceases and I am suddenly in a choke hold with one dagger at my neck the other wrapped at my ear. I struggle to move my body weight so I can take him down but he had lift me off the ground. The fear of him ending me now, driving all the adrenalin into the frantic kicking of my legs.

Instead a strong gush of wind and three clicks sound at my ears. Jean immediately releases his hold and jogs away, snickering in the distance. I struggle to get air into my lungs, as the tattooed man with dark wing stood above me.

"That was pathetic..." He breathed. "Although, you did manage to injure him, and evade a stealth attack. Not many Titans can even do that." A sense of pride fills my heart as Rivaille turns away walking back to where he stood before.

"But, your fighting was still not up to speed, let's see how you fair up against nature." He announces with a wild flap of his wings.  _Nature?_  "LEONHARDT!"

"Sir!" This time the blond girl who had taken out Thomas jumps down, but instead of leaping down like Jean had, she had somehow floated down as if walking on a cloud staircase. Rivaille asks her to reveal her status to me. She rolls her eyes, not bothering to salute as she flicks a lock of hair away from her face.

"Focus Deviant, Titan Ability - Finding people's weaknesses." She too brushes her hands over her BA, bringing out two nunchucks which she swings under her arms.  _Oh great._

"She is your enemy, Defend yourself." Rivaille called out. So this really was a survival test. I readied my Katana again out on front of me. I didn't wait this time, charging straight toward her, only to be knocked back by an unknown force. A painful source at that. Warm blood trickles from my forehead down as I feel myself become wrapped up and hammered by nothingness. It was like the air was turning against me, punching me from behind. I arch my back at the sharp pain in my spine.

My unease grew. I should've known. This girl hadn't been the kindest person to me and not to mention the effortlessness she showed while taking out Thomas, it was hard not to feel on edge. After I had collapsed to the ground, a blistering heat had engulfed around me. I didn't dare gaze at the source. Another kick from the invisible air and pair of firm hands grasping my collar caused me to open my eyes. I was surrounded by a barrier of flames, this insane blonde hoisting me up, nunchucks on the ground next to her. She strikes me with terrifying speed straight into where Jean had just punctured me with her knee.

"That, was for endangering Armin. I can see the weakness in people, but Armin never had one, not until you came into the picture." She shouted over the searing flames, my necklace was going crazy, my light was beginning to vanish from the state of shock I was in. To make matters worse, the earth was shaking underneath me, like it could collapse at any moment. I placed my hands and knees wider on the ground to stabilise myself.

"If you ever, cause Armin anymore harm, I swear to God I will let this fire take you into the Underworld." She snapped with the rage of the elements she was conjuring through her Focus Titan abilities. With a clap of her hands the shake, the air and the fire had disappeared. The stain of red on my hands and the intense burning on my eyebrow and stomach, the only remnants of the intensity being left behind.

"That wasn't necessary Annie." Rivaille admitted coldly, scowl even more deadly than usual. Annie's expression didn't change, making me wonder if anyone had heard what Annie had said to me inside that circle. She simply shrugged and walked back up the stairs to the second level where Armin stood gobsmacked. Both his hands were over his head, eyes wide open and staring into space.

"That was too far Annie." I faintly heard Armin say once she had arrived back next to him. It was then that I realised how close Annie was actually standing next to him. How comfortable he and her were with each other. Something stirred quietly in the depths of my body, but I refused to latch onto it. I didn't bother to rise to my feet. Too exhausted to continue. I didn't feel anything except my beating heart. Then, a spark of anger shoots through me as I stared at the surprised faces of my spectators. It was the sort of surprise when you hadn't expected something. Did they expect me to get out of that?

"Get up." A dark voice scolded at me. Rivaille had uncrossed his arms and was now standing above me, looking down at me like I was a peasant. I reluctantly mustered all the energy I could to push myself up so I was now towering over him. Though I was taller than the former assassin he still had a larger presence than I had, making me the inferior one. Within a few seconds of me stumbling to my feet he had unsheathed his Scythe from his BA, positioning it front of him to attack.

"You have to learn to defend yourself against beings like us, otherwise you will perish. Now... DODGE!" He yells swinging his hefty weapon around, almost decapitating my head in the process. I jumped back just in time, before another swing came to my legs. Leaping over the strike, I instinctively went for an opening, but couldn't find any. He was using his dark wings to an advantage, acting as a shield to any vulnerable spots. I rolled past him, attempting to get some distance to analyse the situation. Maybe if I thought about it logically, I could get some leverage on him. I surveyed his chest, using his various tribal-like tattoos as a key to the vital points I had to aim for. The dark markings that travelled from his floating ribs, across his sternum and to the sensitive point between the armpit and the chest was my main goal.

I tried with all I could to get close to him, but the force of the last few attacks had left me trembling, and the anticipation of what may come next sent spikes of terror along my skin. It was not at all an even battle, his speed and intellect outranked mine completely, I was striking at thin air, each movement I made wasting what little energy I had left. The rage was still churning inside me, almost within my reach to take hold and use it. His sinful eyes sear me to the bone, transferring that rage into hopelessness again. He was forcing me to relive those moments where I had nothing. If that was intentional, it had worked.

I couldn't take the pain anymore. I collapsed to the ground, letting out a strangled cry. A dying sound I had never made before as I swung the Katana at the thick blackening abyss surrounding me. The blade makes contact with something. Suddenly, the whispers start around me from the spectators. Rivaille maneuvered his wings so that I could now see clearly what I had done. My sword had sliced down from the top of his eye down to his pelvic bone in one clean cut. For the first time that I had seen, Rivaille looked hurt, almost shocked. His eyes were widened and his teeth were clenched as the marks slowly began to close up, the blood still trickling down, forming a small puddle of metallic red on the floor.

"Congratulations Eren." He rasps without a hint of malice or sarcasm. "You have now earned my respect." I blinked as if what I had just heard had been my imagination and I didn't think I was the only one. Everyone was staring in awe at the slash that had only just now healed over Rivaille's bare chest. Even Jean and Annie looked shocked as they looked down at their wounded leader. At least, that's what I assumed he was.

The clink of a small chain and the padded run across the floor, shortly makes it's way to me. I stare up at the red-headed Clawed in pigtails and smile as Isabel attempted to get me on my feet. I didn't understand why she was being so nice to me but I didn't argue. "Here, I will get you to the infirmary, there's some things we need to discuss," She placed the kusarigama back in the pouch of her belt, not bothering to place it in her BA again. She then came closer to my ear, the tickle of the fur from her ears making me flinch as she added in a whisper "In private." Putting my weight on her shoulder, I limped to the archway of the infirmary ignoring the stares of the people around me and the internal bickering that was going in my head between confusion and understanding.

 

\---

 

"Do you believe the results now Armin?"

**"Did you put him through all that just so you could make a point Hanji?!"**

"No no, calm down, Rivaille truly wanted to see his ability and from what I saw I think he far exceeded his expectations"

_"He exceeded mine that's for sure."_

**"That's because you nearly killed him Annie."**

_"I knew you wouldn't accept the fact unless I proved it to you."_

**"No. Shut Up. Both of you. Eren IS NOT a Titan!"**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Annie (Italic)  
> Armin (Bold)  
> Hanji (Underline)


	24. Strangers Like Me

I awoke in an unfamiliar place. Waves of dull greys and whites slowly fluttered into my vision as I sat up on a rather uncomfortable mattress, it's springs poking into my upper thighs and tailbone. I had no idea where I was or how I came to be here. The last thing that I remembered was Isabel carrying me to the infirmary after having my 'test' and coughing a heap of blood, shortly after I fell and now I was here.

As I rubbed the sleep out from my eyes, my other senses began to kick in. It wasn't only the room that was new to me but also the smell. It was sweet, almost like a concoction of sandalwood and pine. It reminded me of an autumn meadow or even a spring morning forest floor.

"Oh good you're awake." I jumped at the unfamiliar voice, falling off my mattress onto the cold concrete floor in the process. A jolt of pain was sent up my spine.

"Woah hey, take it easy. I only just healed you up, don't go injuring yourself again." It didn't occur to me what the voice was until he came trotting towards me. And I meant that in a literal sense, as in he had hooves. Hooves that made a clacking noise as he moved each one on and off the ground. In fact, as I began trailing my gaze up to his face, his whole bottom half was identical to that of a goat.

The shaggy grey fur wrapped around his oddly-bent legs right up to his waist, gradually fading back into his human skin just under his navel. He looked down on me with a beaming, freckled face. Two antlers just poked out from the top of his skull through his neat dark hair, hardly visible like a young fawns providing a unique likeness to his desert-brown eyes.

This 'satyr'-like appearance was what I recalled to be an Elfen Titan. Krista had told me they had been the last to be created, made more for domestic purposes and nursing. What they lacked in physical strength and endurance, they made up for with their ability to communicate with nature itself and their overwhelming healing abilities. Only a few were made, most of them dying within a few days of creation due to inadequate testing and finalizations.

He extended his hand out to me, releasing a stronger scent of the sandalwood I had smelled before. It was likely he was the source of the aroma.

"I'm Marco, sorry for scaring you." I stopped rubbing the impact spot on my back where I had fallen and grasped his hand graciously as he pulled me to a stand.

"Eren." I replied shaking his hand. I looked around the room again, noticing a dark uniform much like the ones Armin and Jean was wearing on a dresser across from me, as well as doorway into a lit tiled roomed with a mirror that I assumed to be the bathroom. I stumbled a little from rising too fast, my dizziness causing me to run my back into another object. A bedside table with a lamp, my BA and a keycard on top of it. Inscribed on the back of the card was the words;

 

** E. JAEGER ( _V_ ) **

** SQUAD SC-II **

** 104 **

 

"Eren Jaeger, Vulgaris, part of Squad Two of the Survey Corps, Room 104." Marco said, answering my internal questions.

"How long have I been out?"

"A couple of days."

"A COUPLE OF -" I was interrupted by another dizzy spell, sending me back onto the hard mattress on the ground.

"Woah, hey, easy. Here, I'll get you some water." He quickly stammered as he walked passed me to the bathroom. I rasped a thankyou as I sunk my body weight onto my knees, attempting to get my energy back.

"Incase you were wondering, I haven't been here long. In your room I mean. Your necklace was driving Armin crazy."  _My necklace_. I looked down at the gift from Armin, only just realising the slight heat that lingered. I sighed to myself, realising that judging from the sweat patch on the mattress where I laid and the dampness of my loose shirt and pants that I probably had another nightmare.

"Wouldn't be the first time." I uttered as Marco passed me the heavenly glass of water that I skulled like it was an angel's blessing.

"I'm guessing he was the one who sent you here to check on me?"

"Actually, it was Rivaille who asked me to. He wants you to start training as soon as possible to fill in Thomas' place on Squad SC-II. Damn, I wish I was able to fight like you did." The freckled boy entered a dreamy daze, staring at nothing in particular whilst clutching his stomach.

"Why don't you?" I asked. His dreamy expression switched to one of guilt.

"I'm not much of a fighter." But it wasn't just guilt. I had seen that look before. It was the look Sasha gave me whenever I asked if she wanted to do taekwon-do with me. Connie was always too worried she'd get hurt and felt uncomfortable with her trying it.

"Someone's told you not to, haven't they?" Marco smirked slightly.

"Jean just doesn't want me to get hurt."

"Really? You and that horse-face have a thing for each other?" His freckles became hidden by the sudden red of his cheeks. Turning his head into his hands, he attempted to hide the embarrassment that flooded his face.

"It's not like that! We're just friends!" He exclaimed. I couldn't help but laugh at his adorable awkwardness. It felt great to be able to genuinely laugh again.

"Yea, I've heard that before. Look, you can't let anyone stop you from doing what you want to do." It felt so hypercritical saying this to him, that I had to stop and pause. The silence beckoned me for that change. I placed both of my hands on Marco's shoulders and turned him towards the door.

"Woah, woah. Where are we going?!"

"We are going to see Rivaille, I think it's time we both start making decisions ourselves."

 

\---

 

It didn't take much for Rivaille to let Marco start the training regiment. He was all for it, the more the better. Jean on the other hand, ended up resenting me more. Not just because I had convinced Marco to start training, but because he, along with Isabel had become my closest friends here at Utgard. Over the next two weeks, Rivaille pushed us to the breaking point. He did not waste any time with putting us into the difficult tests. We would wake up at five, and finish at five. He would give us an hour break around lunch time for us to eat and patch up. During this time was when Marco became my walking talking Titan encyclopedia, with Isabel to fill in the blanks.

Marco had been here for so long that he practically knew everyone, where they were from, their weaknesses and their strengths. The reason why Jean was so protective of Marco was that they had been close even before they were Titans. After Jean went 'missing' Marco stopped at nothing to find him. He dropped out of school, ran away from home and searched across the whole of Shingeki before finally getting taken himself. It was a serious break for the both of them. Jean left Utgard out a fit of rage and grief. He came back a week later with a short blonde boy, saying he was the original Titan. They had their blood ritual shortly afterwards.

Isabel's I already sort of knew half of due to media, but I never knew how she came to be. Abandoned when she was four, she learnt to fight and take care of herself in the Underground districts of Shingeki, only with the company of a wolf she befriended. She called it 'Kuinaki Sentaku' or Kui for short, named after her decision to no longer regret the decisions she will make. She learnt how to fight, use manipulation to get what she needed to survive and most of all, learnt that no one was to be trusted. That was until she became cornered in an alleyway. It was three thugs against one sixteen year old girl who had everything they were looking for in a woman. She attempted to fight them off but they had guns. Fortunately so did Rivaille or at the time Levi, and Farlan. They saved her, and she begged them to let her and Kui join them. They reluctantly agreed and then became the underground trio. They were all turned around the same time and were the second to enter a blood ritual after Jean and Armin.

Not everyone is allowed to bind through the blood rituals though. It's an extremely dangerous event that only the elite Survey Corps Titans were allowed to participate in. It is a binding of lives. Hanji discovered how to do it. Marco told me that at a place called ' _The Shrine of_ _Sasayakimasu_ ' two Titans slice a part of their body, usually their hand or the wrist and join their wounds together while chanting " _liberum reddit spiritui nostro, unum nos facere." - "_ Free our spirits, make us one." The underground trio became an exception due to their already overwhelming strength, binding all three of them together. After that, their lives become connected. They can speak to each other through their minds. They can split the pain one feels into both bodies so that it halves the effect. One can take the other's pain away. And they both become ten times as powerful as they once were. There was only one problem. As the two or three lives are connected, if one were to die, a part of the other also dies with them. This was why Thomas had lost it. His Titan bound partner was captured by the Military Police and refused to give details as to where Utgard was. As a result they both lost their lives.

I had given up trying to find science to back-up what these Titans could do. It all seemed too fantastical to comprehend that I just took it all in without another word. Although I was strong, I was no Titan. These training regimens I was put on were meant for people with enhanced senses, greater physical ability, increased cognitive thinking and a vast mental capacity. Me with my busted knee joints, ordinary human strength with nothing but willpower to help me go on, became very tiresome. At least I got an extra break when Titans had to practice their  _Titan abilities_. I was surprised that Marco hadn't trained earlier as his power could of been used well in a strategic place. He was given the nickname of 'freckled Jesus' because his ability was literally to enhance confidence and faith in people, increasing their bravery, confidence and in turn improving their haste and reflexes.

Isabel's  _Titan Ability_ worked perfectly in conjunction with both Rivaille and Farlan's abilities. With her ability to communicate with animals, Rivaille's to conjure sensory illusions and Farlans to create shields and barriers they acted as a perfect team. It was scary watching them go up against the other Titans, even if it was for training, especially with Marco's enhancing abilities boosting them up. All I could do was idly sit back and watch as the real warriors did their magic. Annie would hurl fireballs at Jean who would turn invisible and hurl throwing stars back at her. Krista would shoot arrows at the stars and Annie's nunchakus to distract her while Ymir would go after Isabel to stop Kui and the other wolves she called from outside, but Farlan would put up the shield, stopping Ymir from coming toward her. I was in awe at the chaotic beauty of this unity. Not once did I see Armin training with them.

 

\---

 

Over those weeks I became so much stronger and quicker. It came to the time where Rivaille had to do a final partner test before I went out with my squad which I learnt consisted of Armin, Annie and their titan bound partners. I zipped up the dark long-sleeved vest of my uniform, placed the BA on my utility belt and waited for Marco outside my room. I was slightly nervous but also overly excited for today. I had not spoken to Armin since the day I first came to Utgard. Whenever I asked where he was, it was either they didn't know or that he was busy. But today he was asked to help Rivaille train us.

The clop of hooves on the iron floorboards indicated Marco's arrival.

"You ready?" I nodded, as we walked down the hall to the training quarters. Marco ran his hand over his BA, bringing out his prefered weapon of twin double-crescent blades. They suited his fighting style well as he was quite agile and liked to get up close when he attacked. He twirled them around his arm like he had been training with them for years.

"So how you feeling about being paired up with Armin today?" He asked casually. My footing stopped dead to the ground. The fluorescent lights flickered above us.

"How do you know I am?"

"Rivaille told me. I'm pairing with Jean and you with Armin. C'mon it will be fun." Marco went around me and started pushing me faster towards the quarters. I hesitated a little but straightened my posture when Rivaille came into view, his scythe resting on the wall behind him as he leant up against it. I did not see Armin with him.

"You're late." He said bluntly, not bothering to look up at us. I began to protest before I realised that he wasn't talking about me and Marco. When I turned around, Armin was on the second level on top of us. He quickly somersaulted down into a perfect landing, Jean following close behind him. Jean immediately wrapped Marco in a hug, but Armin stared coldly in front of him, not looking at me once as he walked towards Rivaille. But there was something off about him. I hadn't seen him in weeks so his coldness towards me wasn't strange. It was the dark circles around his eyes and the ever so slight frailty of his hair. He looked exhausted. I made a mental note to ask the horse-face where he had been later.

"Nice of you to show up for once Armin. Mind telling us where you've been hiding this past month?" Rivaille spoke with only a hint of concern. I looked around expecting someone else to fill in his silence, but no one did. Was it possible no one knew where Armin had been?

He finally decided to speak. "I've been working some stuff out sir." Armin said in a monotone. "But I'm okay now, it can wait." Isabel and Farlan came walking up behind us Kui trailing closely behind them. They were equally as surprised that Armin had finally emerged from his disappearance.

"Good, cause of Jaeger here passes today, he will be joining your squad. Including going on your scouting mission tomorrow. Make sure to tell Annie." Armin nodded at Rivaille's claim, and then turned to me slowly. I had never seen such anger in the blondes eyes in the whole of my existence. I was scared for my life.

 

\---

 

**"Annie! Annie! Annie!"**

_"Hitch, I'm not in the mood."_

**"I can see that, but you may want to know this."**

_"What?"_

**"You know that new guy. You know the cute one with the Titan but not so Titan eyes."**

_"You mean Eren?"_

**"Yea, he's going to be filling in for Thomas on our squad. Isn't it great, I'm so going to make him mine."**

_"Good luck with that, he's got the hots for Armin don't you know."_

**"Ooooooooh, jealous much?"**

_"No."_

**"Alright, alright, I'll leave you to your moping. I'm going to go watch them and probably fantasize about them making out later."**

_"Why the fuck are we friends."_  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Annie (Italic)  
> Hitch (Bold)


	25. The First Hunt

I had been training with Armin since I was a kid. Heck, he even trained me when I first decided to come with him weeks ago. But nothing could've prepared me for the way he fought now. He did not bother to hold back. Although Rivaille had told us that Titan abilities were off limits today, Marco still insisted that he healed the bruises and cuts Armin would cause. He wasn't subtle about his anger either. Armin lunged forward, aiming straight for my chest with his two swords ready to puncture my skin.  _'It's all for conditioning'_  I kept telling myself.  _It will better my reflexes._

It had gotten to the point where Jean and Marco had stopped doing their exercises and Isabel and Farlan were no longer helping them. They were all focused on my technique against Armin. As the blonde circled around me, sweat dripped off my face, soaking into my shirt. The grip on my katana became slippery and sticky all at the same time. I took a single glance away from Armin's death staring eyes to notice that Jean genuinely seemed worried. It wasn't clear if he was in Armin's head or not, but whatever was happening wasn't normal. As Armin advanced forward with a hellish scream, Rivaille's wing separated us apart. He too looked worried.

Armin's death glare moved over to him.

"Let's move on to something else, shall we?" Rivaille directed towards Armin more than anyone else, warning him to back off. Armin glanced away from both of us. Rivaille's wing closed back up behind him as he whistled over Marco and Jean. After acknowledging that Armin had finally calmed down, we proceeded back into our pairings and worked on some reflex drills. Armin would throw an attack, whether it be from his blade or from his limbs, and I would have to counter. After a few times of nearly getting kebabed by the blondes blades, Rivaille again came up to us.

"You waiting too long Jaeger, if Armin was actually trying, you would of died about twenty-seven times by now." I tried not to look discouraged, but I could tell he saw through it. He breathed a heavy sigh.  _This was him not trying!?_

"Here, what you want to do is always watch your opponent's shoulders." Armin went into his neutral guarding stance as Rivaille talked.

"Watch as he moves forward, even if it's with a kick, his shoulder will always move first. You need to move forward as he does this..." Armin advanced towards Rivaille swiftly with a low strike to the inner thighs with both his swords, which Rivaille was able to avoid by moving in towards him, stopping the strike from occurring by just coming up close. "... and intercept it." Rivaille continued after dropping Armin to the floor like he was a weightless flower. He held his hand out to the blonde and lifted him up, using his wings to also pass his dropped swords to him.

"If you intercept the technique fast enough, then it will throw off his balance and you will get your own chance to strike." I kept Rivaille's advice in mind as we went through various drills for the rest of the training session. It had come to the last drill we had to perform. Armin had not said a word to me at all, not even a 'get up' or 'are you okay' when he knocked me down. All I had gotten was a slight turn of the head. I didn't know what it was, the frustration of his lack of conversation with me or the fact that I was in a dire state of fatigue but I was determined to get a reaction out of him. I readied my stance and waited for him to strike. When the slightest movement of his shoulder did occur, I went in full blast, not caring where his attack went. I feigned my katana to his chest, making him leave his bottom half exposed. Taking the opportunity, I went down on my knees, and swept his legs out from under him in one swift motion. He landed with a heavy thud and a loud gasp. Everyone looked awestruck, including me.

Isabel wooed from behind me, clapping manically. Farlan only laughed at her antics. I rose to a stand and extended out a hand to him. Armin got to both his knees and stared at the hand for what seemed like ages. One thing I thought I did knock out of him though, was his evil glare. It was replaced with one of shock, and from what I thought I could see, fear. He then looked away and stood up himself.

"Good job Eren." He quietly said, before swiping his hands over his BA to put his blades away and walked towards the direction of the dorms.

The subtle footsteps of Marco's hooves slowly crept up next to me.

"He really does hate me doesn't he." I said without turning to him. He gave a slight chuckle.

"I don't think it's that he hates you Eren. I think it's that he hates that you're here. As much as he tries to embrace being a Titan through his powers and such, he still hates who he's become. He doesn't like that you're associating with what he would believe to be monsters." He calmly stated. He then stammered "Uh- at- at least that's what I think." I turned to look at the sweating boy, and realised that I wasn't the only one who was completely exhausted. Even Jean seemed a little puffed as he made sure that he was standing closer to Marco then me.

I knew Armin didn't really like the fact that he was a Titan, but I never stopped to think what coming here and fighting for them would mean to him. I stopped myself before I dwelled on the thought any longer and spun myself into an endless series of unanswered questions and non-existent answers. I knew why I was here, and I knew I could fight. If those with the means and the power to fight don't, then who would? The harsh flap of giant wings sent my hair flying to the side. Rivaille stood there with his arms crossed over his bare tattooed chest.

  
"Impressive Jaeger." He called out. He pulled out an overused rag and chucked in my direction. I caught it and looked at it closer, trying to ignore the state of it as I wiped the perspiration from neck and face.

"Welcome to the Survey Corps, your first mission starts tomorrow. Get some rest, you're going to need it."

 

\---

 

We were ordered to meet at the runway at five-thirty in the morning all geared up and ready to go. I came to learn that my new Survey Corps Squad - II was made up of Armin, Annie and both their Titan bound partners, Jean and a clawed titan name Hitch. The best friend that hated my guts, he girl who attempted to burn me alive and the horse who didn't like me for the sake of not liking me. I had a feeling this was going to be an interesting first day on the job. By the time I got to the runway, everybody was already there ready to go. Also waiting there was Rivaille, ready to give us the mission for the day. We already knew what we had to do but because it was my first time and I wasn't a Titan or anything, he wanted to take extra precautions. It was a simple hunting trip, seeing as Utgard trade routes with Karanase were now obsolete. We just had to come back with a few kills and edible vegetation that we found in the surrounding woodland forests.

Jean took lead and we all followed him into the forest. I continued to stray behind the pack. It was obvious to everyone that I was still the runt of the litter. Didn't matter how much training I got or how much I tried, I would never match their strength, endurance or intellect. Not unless I was a Titan myself. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to become one. The way Armin would effortlessly leap over ten feet into the air and stay hovering above us to scout terrain. How Jean could literally make everyone around him invisible as well as himself to sneak up behind game and give it a painless end. How Annie could conjure a ball of fire out of nothing and use it to light up the dark parts of the forest. Though, I thought it painful to grow a tail, claws, wings or even hooves, being a Deviant wouldn't be so bad. Armin would never agree to it though. But, I did manage to get him to let me stay here, maybe I could convince him.

After loading about five kills into our storage modulators, Hitch thought it would be good idea to split up into groups. Seeing as she had the nose and the ears for hunting, her and Jean would go off and find the meat, while their Titan bound partners went to gather the other foods.

"Where do I go?" I asked hesitantly. Hitch's mouth opened as if to say something but Armin stepped in.

"He'll come with us. Contact us if anything comes goes wrong." I was taken off guard by the familiarity of his tone. There was no anger, no frustration, just genuinity. That made me even more worried. Jean and Hitch nodded and headed through the thick shrubbery towards the grazing fields while Armin, Annie and I searched the damper parts of the woods.

The light was hovering right above us, grinning down humid, sticky heat as the afternoon sun rose. I could see the shining rays tickle the tip of Armin's nose. He smiled at the beam as if it were a long lost friend. Annie also looked up, not at the sun's rays but at it's place in the sky.

"We'll head North-East. That's where the river ends, their oughta be some decent vegetation there." Armin nodded and continued forward, pushing away the thick branches and bushes that were in his way. It felt like I had backtracked to where I first began. Completely confused by Armin's behaviour and having no clue in the world where I was heading through the outside yet feeling totally comfortable following him.

We had been walking in the same direction for over two hours before the soothing sound of rushing water signalled that we were close. Armin told Annie to go ahead to the river and find more water-based items while we scouted the area just here. She nodded and went on ahead. He proceeded to look around all the oaks of the trees, collecting various berries, herbs, and mushrooms to take back. It was lucky I had done my survivalists courses, so I knew exactly what was bad and what was good. This task wasn't exactly what I was expecting when people claimed I would be part of an elite team, picking berries and herbs, but I understood why it was important.

After a few minutes of hefty silence, Armin gave a loud sigh to the wind.

"I'm sorry." Was all he said. I stopped what I was doing so I could face him.

"For the way I've been treating you. I'm sorry." He dropped his arms into his lap and closed his eyes. A few of the nestercians rustled in the slight breeze. I didn't say anything. I understood what Marco was telling me, that this was hard on him as well, and that I should be there for him as much as he was there for me.

"It's okay," I finally said, making my way over to him to talk properly. "But you know it's my choice, I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to help you."

"What?! No. NO. That's not-" A loud rustle interrupted his confused, stressed out state. Then, an odd clicking sound accompanied the rustle, along with a wild hiss. Armin's iris' flashed to purple. He immediately pulled out his two swords from his BA. I took out my katana and followed him toward the bush he was peeking through. As he parted the evergreen leaves so I could take a look, I couldn't help but feel like my worst nightmares were coming true. At least the ones I remembered from when I was a kid. It would be an understatement to call it a monster. It was legitimately a mutant armoured lizard, shining scales, tail and all. It was at least two if not three times the size of us. A translucent oozing liquid dripped from its curved teeth that peeked out of it's hot red snout. It's whole body was that same blinding red and black. It's piercing yellow eyes peered straight at us. Armin immediately drew back, pulling me with him as it made another loud hissing growl. This surprised me. He too was afraid of it.

"Scaled." A female voice whispered above us. Annie dropped down on my other side and parted the bushes again so that we all could look at the beast who seemed preoccupied with something on the ground..

"What's it doing so close to Utgard?" Armin whispered.

"I don't know, I think a better question is why is it alone? They always travel in groups."

"Wait, what's a 'scaled'?" I asked, looking to both titans on either side of me for answers.

"Another breed of Titan. More beast than human. The way they were sequenced causes all human instincts to cancel out with the reptile's, causing them to purely be a mutant beast, with the exception that they can understand language but only respond to their creator." Armin explained, disgust filling his words.

"So... that means-"

"Yes." Annie interrupted. "They are part of the Garrison Regiment, the Titan Commandment sent them, and by extension... The doctor himself." This was bad. Very bad.

"Eren, come over here." Armin asked more than demanded. I followed him a few feet away from Annie as she continued to stare down the monster.

"Look, there is something I need to tell you..." He glanced quickly at me then back down again. I could still see the exhaustion in his features.

"Armin, you know you can tell me anything. What is it?" He was frozen still, mouth agape with no words that could come out. Suddenly, the deathly shriek of the reptile we were just looking at echoed throughout the forest, along with the loud thud of paws that stole all three of our gazes. We all readied our blades and awaited the culprit to emerge.

"WAIT! I COME IN PEACE!" A woman's voice I recognised said through the bushes. On all fours was Hanji. She rose to her reer legs, revealing a large gash across her cheek as well as the shift in her eyes that were now a sunburnt yellow, along with slitted pupils much like a cats. Her fangs were bared more than usual and her ears seemed more feral. Like how Armin's purple iris' and enhanced ability was his Titan state, this was Hanji's or a clawed Titan's state.

She was panting quite heavily and struggled to find breath.

"It's- there's been- I can't-" She stammered.

"Hanji, breathe. Tell us what's going on." Armin chanted.

"You need to contact your Titan bound partners immediately, we've entered a state of emergency." Hanji exclaimed frantically, shaking Annie's shoulders like she was mad. Her ears began to twitch violently and her extended claws dug holes into Annie's arms, though you would never notice due to her lack of expression. She simply pulled away and let them heal within a few seconds.

"You need to slow down. Why are we in an emergency?" I said calmly. We all waited for her breathing to become even which thankfully didn't take too long. Though she was still short for breath, she finally was able to collect her words. After one huge suck in for air, she uttered knowledge that was nothing short of panic worthy.

"The Garrison Regiment - They- they found us." Armin's breathing became heavy.

"Utgard has been invaded."  _This really was bad..._

 

\---

 

_"Rivaille! Behind you!"_

**"Shit, there's too many of them. We need the others!"**

_"I just sent Hanji out to get them, they should be here soon."_

**"Remember the drill. It is more than likely they are here for Eren. If we have any chance at completing our goal, our priority is his life."**

_"After however many months of keeping this place secure, why is it only now they find us?"_

**"Focus on that later, go find Marco and make sure he's not fighting. We will need our healer after this."**

_"Okay... be careful big brother!"_  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Isabel (Italic)  
> Rivaille (Bold)


	26. Chaos At It's Finest

We ran as fast as we could, leaping over the rushing stream, towards the distant sound of clashing blades and blood-curdling screams. Jean and Hitch were already at the runway by the time the four of us had made it. Hanji ran straight into Utgard, not bothering to wait for us. She called out a massive growl as she leapt onto all fours and sprinted towards the arch gateway. We all readied our blades, ready to follow to take on what may have laid ahead.

I prepared for the worst. We ran in, weapons slicing through the thick chaos that was emitting through to the outside. Hanji suddenly stopped at the railings, the loud screech splitting my eardrums as her claws skidded along the iron floor. As we entered into the archway of Utgard, there was no mistaking that it was definitely under attack. We were in the midst of an overwhelming sea of chaos. Waves of enemies dressed in black outnumbered us almost ten to one. Their armies were much like ours, consisting of Winged, clawed, deviants and even those scaled I had seen earlier. They were all dressed in the same dark attire, all fighting in groups against the Titans of Utgard.

In the corner of my eye, I noticed a shining blue object glinting in the light. A male deviant had leapt up from the ground level with a bow in hand. Before I could even register that the object was flying straight toward us, someone had shouted my name and pushed me down to the ground. I assumed it was Armin due the light weight and the blond hair on top of me. But Armin was at least three feet away from me with Jean pinned over him protectively. It wasn't him that had saved me. It was Annie.

I uttered a thank you to her as she hoisted me on my feet.

"Don't mention it." I took a closer look at the projectile that was aimed for us and noticed that it was a arrow, coated in a thick blue liquid. The same blue liquid which I recognised was poisonous to Titans. This wasn't just an ambush. These people knew we were here.

"How did they find us?" Hitch cried out from behind. Her voice held fear, but her eyes held anger.

"THEY HAD BEEN PLANNING IT FOR WEEKS!" A female voice shouted. We all turned around to see Isabel, swinging into action with her Kusarigama, Kui trailing not far behind. My breath became heavy and I could feel the unease swelling up inside.

"Who is behind it?" Jean asked with sternity. Isabel was about to answer, when Kui's loud barking interrupted her. The wolf growled towards the archway where a horde of enemy Titans were approaching. They all possessed those demonic full glowing eyes, that blinded if you stared for too long. We went to go the other direction but two other groups were also approaching.

We formed a circle where the eight of us had backed into each other. The titans snarled and growled as they backed us in tighter. None of us were going to let our guard down. Despite this, the growing heat on my chest from the talisman proved that I was more than frightened. A shiver ran down my spine as I felt a sympathetic look come my way from Armin. A clawed, only a few feet in front of me raised it's back ready to leap into action. I poised my katana ready to give her what she deserved. Just as the Titan leapt towards me with a mighty roar, a silver arrow pierced straight through it's head. This was followed by another, then another, until there was a whole volley showering through the hearts and skulls of numerous Titans. A thick white cloud glazed over us and landed at our feet. The cloud I recognised as wings, and those wings were too white to belong to anyone else. Krista flicked her blonde hair from her face. She took a large breath in and screamed "EREN RUN!"

All of the Titans around me broke off into the massive enemy waves. A large whirlwind swooped past me. Stopping to block a strike that I did not notice was coming straight for my stomach. That whirlwind belonged to Ymir who was using her staff to protect me. I got the message and rolled out of the way.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE!?" She yelled at me.

"ARMIN!" The blonde turned towards Ymir as he ran his two blades across his victim's neck, the entrails of his decapitated head flinging onto his face and the wall behind him.

"GET HIM OUT OF HERE, IT'S HIM THEY WANT!" Ymir delivered the finishing blow to the enemy's chest, causing him to collapse at her feet. She sped off in unknown direction. I turned back to Armin to see he was no longer where he was. But then I heard his voice calling out for Isabel over the ruckus.

"TAKE EREN AND GO!" He yelled. Quicker than I could protest. Isabel had me over her shoulders and was leaping down to the ground level of Utgard. It was even more chaotic here then it was down there. The rising steam of Titan corpses made it almost impossible to see. The stench of blood and sweat overpowered the means to collect any vivid images I was trying to picture through it. The occasional silhouette of warrior cries and immense sacrifices helped to analyse what was happening through my blindness. What was more distressing was the screams and cries of my friends, laying down their lives. And for what? It couldn't of possibly been for me. There was no way the Garrison Regiment could've known I was here.

A spotlight through the mist was cleared through a winged Titan's flap. Through it, I was able to distinguish something that I was sure no else had picked up on yet. As I store into the eyes of a scaled, biting into the neck of one of our winged. As his lifeless body hung in the jaws of the beast, I realised that the only corpses I could see, was that of winged and a few deviants. Some of our Titans were being ignored. All of our clawed for one, and Isabel, Kui and I, which were headed straight through heaps of enemies yet they didn't turn for us. That's when it clicked.

"They're not after us." I mumbled out loud. I jumped off of Isabel's shoulders and charged through the choking grey blanket. Ignoring the shouts of protest from Isabel I leapt over the fallen corpses of three of our winged. I pushed their soulless eyes aside and continued running. I had to find Rivaille.

 

\---

 

It wasn't that hard to find him. All I had to do was find large groups of dark demon looking illusions and a mass of Titans screaming on the floor in agony. My theory was becoming more and more true as I rushed passed numerous more groups of enemies who paid me little to no attention. If I was their main focus, I would of been Titan food by now. Once I saw the massive dark wingspan, I knew I had found him. I called out to Rivaille from down below causing him to turn quickly. His pupils closed in and many of his illusions vanished. Farlan then pounded out of nowhere, pushing me behind him. He quickly raised a shield through his Titan powers around us.

"What are you doing here? You need to get -"

"IT'S NOT ME THEY'RE AFTER!" I shouted quickly. I placed our backs together so that we could cover each other as more and more Titans came pouring out. I utilised what I had learned in my training and battled each enemy that came my way. One after one, my victims fell.

"They are only going after the Winged and the Deviants." I told both Rivaille and Farlan as we continued to push them back.

"You're point?"  
"They are trying to weaken us by attacking our healers. If we don't have healers then we can't regenerate. They can't be after me alone."  
"WE KNOW THIS!" Rivaille yelled. With intense speed, he left his post and came soaring towards me. He placed both of his arms under mine and lifted me into the air. I tossed and turned, demanding that he put me down.

"You are our most valuable asset. We cannot risk you." He stated.  _Most valuable asset?_  I was going to continue my attempt at release, but a sight more distressing than this whole chaos closed my throat shut. My necklace went wild, practically melting from the panic I was in. If I was standing, my knees would have given in. It was Armin. Had two built titans holding his arms down either side of him down on the ground. A third with a blue-oozed covered sword in his grasp, standing over him. Armin was shrieking and wailing in pain as the titan slowly brought the blade from his ankle to his ribs.

His eyes shifted from a full glow to his Titan purple with each breath he attempted to take. It was unbearable to watch the steam as it left his body. His tears soaked into the gloves of his laughing captors. It was the most painful, gut-wrenching scene I had ever witnessed. I brought my katana up in front of Rivaille's face, distracting him enough for me to tear out of his hold. I landed with a loud thud and charged towards Armin's torturers. I screamed his name as I sprinted towards him. That was my first mistake. The three Titans and Armin all looked at me simultaneously.

"EREN NO!" A foot suddenly collided with the side of my body. Sending me flying up towards a large deserted part of the second floor. I landed against the iron floor boards with a humongous crash. I cringed as I struggled to lift myself up. A splitting ache ran from my shoulder to the tips of my fingers. It had little mobility in it, and all of the bones within it felt shattered. I bit my lip to quell the whimper that was about to escape my mouth.

My nose began to tickle from something rather soft and silky. When I lifted my eyes, I saw a long ochre-coloured tail. My gaze followed it up toward a manically laughing clawed Titan with jet black clothing, like the enemy Titans. Her devious brown eyes poured down onto me like a hawk eyeing its prey. A thick smirk covered her face as she pulled her leg back and delivered her foot straight into my stomach. I coughed up a mound of blood, as I struggled to breathe.

I saw her foot being dragged back again. But before she could deliver another kick a body jumped down from above me and was placed protectively in front of me.

"Don't you dare touch him." It was Armin. I could still the steam rising from his body. He turned to me for only a second, but the was all I needed to see the massive steaming gash running down in his eye to his cheek. The woman snickered with a simple click of her fingers or rather claws together. Armin looked around puzzled but was then hoisted up by a man in the same attire as the clawed. He had Armin by his neck with a blue covered knife at his throat. The man smiled as Armin attempted to struggle. He dragged him next to the woman and nodded at her.

"Thank You Oluo." She said politely. My ears rung to the sound of the woman's boots coming closer towards me. She placed a claw on my chin and tilted my head towards her own.

"Hmmm, not bad for an unborn. That blow would of killed anyone else" She said. Armin grunted and tried to pull away again from Oluo.

"Don't you even think about it Petra!" He growled. Petra? That name. It was so familiar? Where had I heard it before?. Even her face, her voice. A trickle of blood began to fall from my scalp down my cheek, forming a small pool where my broken arm was hanging.

"Oh? He doesn't know? That's no way to treat your friend." She cocked her head to the side, an ill-mannered grin smiling from cheek to cheek.

"Well, let's hope you don't turn before we can use you." She grabbed a fistful of my hair forcefully, causing the blood to fall heavier. I yelped at the sting coursing through my body. Armin had his head bowed down as she did this. He slowly rose his head up as he whispered something that not even I could hear.

"I'm sorry what was that?" Petra asked sarcastically, placing a paw over her ear.

"Over. My. Dead. BODY!" He yelled in a demonic tone. He was in his full Titan shift, his fangs dripping from his mouth and his eyes shined in a full glowing purple. With ease, Armin picked up Oluo from behind him and flung him across the complex. Petra stumbled back in fear at her comrades scream. I could feel her shaking through the creaking iron floorboards. She put two fingers in her mouth and let out a loud echoing whistle. As if on cue, a loud howl erupted from outside. Everyone at Utgard froze. Everyone except Armin.

He did not register the noise and continued to pursue Petra. She was backed up against a corner with nowhere to go except towards the possessed Titan. Her lips suddenly stopped quivering, the floorboards stopped shaking and her expression became snide. She leapt over Armin and ran towards the archway. She got on her hind legs and waved towards us.

"I hope you like our departing present. Oluo! Let's go!" But before she could fully depart. Jean suddenly appeared in front of her, ready to fight. How long had he been waiting there invisible? With no time to lose he slashed at her with his daggers, easily overpowering her with his speed and height. I used as much strength as I could muster to lift myself with my working arm to follow her. No way was she getting away that easy. But another howl sounded and suddenly a being larger than anything I had ever seen.

"There's my night titan." Petra said. Like the scaled we had seen in the forest, this was definitely more beast than man. Only this beast was part wolf.

"GET THE UNBORN!"

The wolf-man or night titan, store straight towards my frail body. I held my blade with one hand, knowing it could never be enough to fight this thing off. Armin ran full force towards it but was shortly tugged away by an enemy winged. He growled and swung at the winged but he was already too far away to do anything. It advanced at full speed toward me. I put the blade protectively in front of me and really prepared for the worst. My life was minutes away from ending when Jean sliced off the arm that was coming straight for me.

I didn't know what it was but a sudden boost of faith and confidence suddenly brought me back on my toes. Ready to fight again. It was unbelievably sudden. Almost too good to be true. Unless... A loud crash sent my gaze across the complex. Jean had been slashed by the night titan, ending in him becoming winded against the wall. The beast was about to slash again, when a freckled Elfen Titan stepped in front and took the hit for him.

"MARCO!" Jean shrieked as Marco was flung like a rag doll across the floor. Rivaille swooped in with an ear-piercing screech, finishing off the night titan with his poisoned scythe at the nape of it's neck. Petra witnesses the death first hand, whistling a retreat to all. All of the enemy titans abandoned their posts and sped out. Most of our Titans attempted to follow but little succeeded. For most it would of been a time for cheering, but one look at the casualties laying scattered everywhere and the mass decrease of standing allies, meant everything but joy.

An eerie silence stood instead with only a simple whisper of Marco's name from Jean. He ran over to the unconscious Titan, quickly holding him in his arms. The wound from the slash where the night titan had hit Jean, slowly seeped onto Marco's side. A single tear left his eye.

"Damn it Marco, you fucking idiot..." He sniffled, as he brought his forehead to his own. Just when I thought he was really gone, the tips of Marco's fingers began to twitch. Then his hand, then his whole arm. He brought his arm to the bloody gash in Jean's side, slowly healing it into a scar. Jean's breath hitched as he looked down at the rip in his shirt where the blood was once seeping. He finally opened his eyes and smiled as Jean held him.

"Oh my gosh Marco! You're okay!" He wrapped his hands around Marco's neck pulling him up for a hug. Marco returned it silently. My happiness at the relief was almost instantly taken away as the echo of Kui's aggressive barking and howling sparked my attention. I could hear the struggle in Isabel's voice as I ran as fast as I could to the ground level. She was standing in front of her as Isabel struggled to coax her companion into calming down. She turned to me, tears streaming down her eyes.

"IT'S ARMIN, SHE WON'T CALM DOWN!" That's when I realised most of the growling wasn't coming from the wolf. Behind me, Armin was pinned down to the ground again, only this time it was Ymir and Hitch holding him. I didn't even recognise him. Dark red spilled from his mouth where his fangs poked out and from his violent glowing eyes. He thrashed demonically as Annie straddled him, attempting to pull him out of his trance. He hissed and roared at the air as a circle began to form around him.

"He won't come down from it!" Hitch exclaimed. Annie kept trying to soothe him with her words but nothing was working.

"Let me try." I told them. I don't know where the sudden boost in confidence came from, but I couldn't bare to see him like this any longer. Annie returned a look of disgust.

"Annie..." Hitch pleaded. Her ears drooped and her gaze fell. "Please..." Annie took one look at Armin and slowly exchanged spots with me. I put my knees on either side of his hips and rested my elbow next to his head closing him in. His chest heaved and shook roughly. He was incredibly hot, nearing the point of burning. Using my good arm, I caressed my hand over his face, slowly tracing the scar that had not yet healed over his eye. Almost instantly his whole body stopped shaking.

"Armin..." His eyes begin to shift from the glow to purple as his breathing became more even

"Armin it's me... Please... Wake up." I continued to stare into his glowing orbs until he was completely out of his phase. He began to blink again and his violet beams died down to a sapphire ocean blue. I nodded at Ymir and Hitch to let go of his arms. I moved back onto his legs so that he was able to sit himself up.

I took his hand and pulled him so he was standing up. As soon as I could see that he was able stand properly without my help, I decided to let my feelings out.

"You okay?" He nodded. I drew back my hand and slammed it across Armin's cheek. He raised his hand and cupped the red mark.

"Good, cause you have got some explaining to do."

 

\---

 

_"Petra! Petra did you see his eyes! The doctor was right! He must be- ugh-"_

**"Honestly it's a surprise you still have a tongue after all the times you've bitten down on it. But yes, it's definitely true. Eren Jaeger is an unborn."**

_"How are we going to get him though. There's no way the doctor can advance in his research without him."_

**"Relax. I know exactly what I'm doing."**

_"But- But what about Armin. What if he shifts again next time we try?"_

**"That's what we're counting on."**

_"We?"_

**"What if I told you I had someone on the inside that is more than willing to help us."**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Petra (Bold)  
> Oluo (Italics)


	27. Answers

When Armin and I were younger, we used to walk through the forest across from our house every afternoon after school. We had practically memorized the entire area from the amount of time we spent just wandering aimlessly. From the tallest growing trees to the most vibrant colours of the rustling leaves, it had become our little secret untouched gaven.

One evening as we were walking, Armin’s feet collapsed under him near a steep slope. Instinctively, he grabbed my shoulders to keep himself steady, only to succeed in pulling me down tumbling with him. I pulled him in close, believing we were about to run smack bang into a solid rock wall. Instead we had travelled through a curtain of thick green vines that left only a few small bruises on our faces and arms.

We had accidentally stumbled upon a lost hidden tunnel. I remember the polite change of warm to cold as we passed through the thick wall of green. I was blinded by my frustration at the pain of the plant's impact on us and how we were going to get out. So blinded in fact, that I hadn’t stopped to look at what laid at the end of the tunnel.

That’s when a rush of wind snapped me back into reality and showed me the heaven we had mistakenly entered. I recalled it like I had only discovered it yesterday. The rushing water falling over the risen cliff edge. The subtle crash of the water falling into the crystal clear pool down the bottom. The surrounding luscious emerald grass that glinted in the small spotlight through the stone ceiling. In the middle of it all next to the pool, stood a single tree, with blooming sapphire blossoms that fell gently into the water creating even ripples. It was as if this little slice of serenity had been created just for the two of us.

We kept it a secret from all of our family and friends. Being the children we were at the time, we had decided to name our secret place ‘The Tree of Truth’. At the time, it was the most amazing name in the history of Shingeki. It was our place of secrets and truths. When anything was making either of us uncomfortable, we promised to come here to let everything out. Through this, we never kept anything from each other and we kept open minds as we talked about our pre-teen problems. I would give anything to exchange those miniscule problems for the drama I was facing in the present.

It was strange how only a few years later, that concept of two friends telling each other everything could wash down the drain. That the one person you thought told you everything could change so much within such a short amount of time. It wasn’t fair to me. He had been doing this for far too long. I’m sure he had his reasoning behind it, but we used to fight our wars together. I was done being the clueless soldier to his commanding strategy. Done not knowing what or why this was happening. I had been begging for answers for too long. Now, I was going to demand them.

It was obvious that the tension was thick in the room. Rivaille had ordered everyone but Hanji, Isabel, Farlan, Jean, Armin and myself to go out and clean up the wreckage from the battle. This included the corrupt bodies of those who had lost their titan bound partners in the fight. In total, over half of our titans perished, the majority of those being winged. That wasn't including the ones I could hear screaming from below in the cellars. With the deaths of numerous deviants, clawed and our only other Elfen titans we had besides Marco, the whole place felt extremely physically and mentally broken. Not even Marco’s powers could raise the spirits of the survivors.

You could feel it in everyone’s bowed heads towards the floor, the stiff body language of everyone around me as I stood in the centre of the meeting room. Even the usually bubble Isabel was softly patting Kui on her lap in an attempt to ease both of their nerves. A loud shift of the door sliding open broke our eerie silence.

“Rivaille Sir!” The man saluted with his fist clenched over his heart. Rivaille responded with a faint nod in his direction.

“Sir, I finished the casualty count as you asked. Fifty-six have fallen sir including Mina our elfen. Thirteen have also been taken to the cellars. We await your orders.” Kui let out a small whimper. Rivaille cussed under his breath and massaged his temples roughly. Hanji dismissed the man, telling him to “deal with them in the most humanitarian way as possible.” She placed a hand on Rivaille’s shoulders in an attempt to comfort him.

“Do you know why we are here, Eren?” The dark winged man asked. I nodded cautiously, not completely certain that what I knew was true.

“We are here for the sole purpose of restoring our humanity.” He started, voice filled with a lust for hate. “As much as we try to embrace what we have  _unwillingly_  become, when we get down to it, we are not natural -”

“Or so we thought..” Hanji interrupted. I could see Armin becoming more and more tense in the corner of my eye with every word spoken.

“Eren, do you remember your first day here? When we had you take that test?” Jean snickered at the mention of the day I could never forget. The day where I had utterly failed at defending myself. Farlan bumped his shoulder as a warning that it wasn’t the time to joke around.

“Earlier that day, I had taken your blood remember,” Hanji continued. “When I ran it through the DNA analyser, there was something different yet oddly familiar about your gene structure.” All of our eyes were glued to Hanji as she spoke. My only focus was her and her alone.

“It’s the reason why Jean couldn’t turn you invisible at Karanase but could do so with the others. It’s the reason Rico couldn’t read your mind, The reason why you couldn’t see the illusions Rivaille was directing toward you during your test. The reason why Armin can’t see into your dreams. The reason why everyone stares into your eyes and become shocked to find that you’re really human. It’s because you are not… entirely… human.”

My lungs had ceased to work. Armin finally broke from his mute state.

“You have the Titan Gene…” Beads of sweat began to trickle down my forehead. It made no sense. There was no way I could be Titan. I would of been able to feel it wouldn’t I? It was so confusing. My thoughts were travelling in all directions, pushing against the base of my skull. The walls around me felt like they were closing in, fading and and out of my blurred vision. My body was going to give out from under me from shock.

Just as I thought I was going to collapse backwards, a large bundle of grey fur leapt over and was supporting me from behind. Kui’s soft aqua eyes looked up at me sympathetically. I stood still for a few more moments to even my breath and clear up my eyesight. Everyone waited patiently for me to adjust to the new information.

“Are you okay?” Armin questioned worriedly.

“NO! Of course I’m not okay! How long have you known?!” I interrogated. I felt a hand grasp my shoulder from behind and pulled me away. I hadn’t even realised that through my state of feeling utterly betrayed, I had been gradually getting more close to Armin. I wacked the hand away, discovering it belonged to Farlan. Armin finally straightened himself up and crossed his arms over his chest submissively.

“I was there when she found out.”

“It’s impossible! There must be a mistake! I would've known, I would've felt it, I -”

“Not if you had it the whole time.” Hanji interrupted. “I don’t know how it could be, but from what I’ve been able to understand, it seems as though you were born with a dormant titan gene in your DNA.”

“Dormant?” I questioned.

“Yes, meaning you are not exactly a Titan yet. It needs to be triggered.” My hands brushed past my legs as I dug my nails into the palms of my hands. Just when I thought I finally understood, it had to all come crashing down in an endless pit of frustration and confusion.

If Hanji didn’t know who did? Kui brushed past my legs again in an attempt to calm me once more. I adored the wolf’s persistence, but nothing was going to take away this feeling of helplessness. I was always the one being saved. Always the one dragging everyone down. How on earth was I supposed to fulfill my promise if I couldn’t even keep myself alive? Unless… Unless there was another way.

“Hanji? Is there a way to trigger it?” Her eyes widened in shock. Only a mumble of staggered sounds came out before a certain blonde interrupted.

“It doesn’t matter, it won’t happen.” Armin butted in before Hanji could conjure her words.

“It’s not  _your_  choice to be made.” I growled. Instead of the assumed anger I would've usually seen in Armin, he still seemed quite hurt.  _What on earth has gotten into him?_

“Actually it is.” Rivaille started. He proceeded to explain that through Hanji’s research, she had been able to decipher what was needed to activate the gene. It was simple really. All it had to do was to come into contact with an elite deviant titan’s gene structure or one of the first to be created. In other words, I would need to inject Armin’s blood into my system. “... Or drink it directly.” Everyone looked to Armin, as if to ask how he felt about this. No words were needed to convey how much he hated the idea. There was no way it was going to happen.

“Armin, if it comes down to it, we may need you to do it.” Isabel uttered. Armin remained silent, refusing to give any insight. As I stared at his pained expression, my eyes flickered to the pulse of the dying light globe above us. The constant switch from dim to light somehow reminded me of Armin. One minute dark and unsure the next, calm and collected. That’s when it hit me. If Petra knew about me, that meant that the doctor had to know about me. They could of known long before Hanji had figured it out. All these weeks of attempting to know why these people were after me finally hit through the shuddering light.  _Don’t you even think about it,_ Armin’s voice played in my head. I turned to see the blonde shooting me the look that said exactly his message. He didn't have to read my mind to know when I wanted something. Ignoring his warning, I asked Hanji if it was possible if I was the key to the cure. That it must of been the reason that the Garrison Regiment was after me. The doctor wouldn’t of wanted there to be the risk of ending his experiments, so he wanted me eliminated. Fortunately, she theorised the same thing.

“That’s why, if the time comes we may need to turn you. If the gene is activated, we may not be able to use it. There is the chance that they may not only want you eradicated but want you to be able to create more. They won’t succeed if you are already a titan...” As Hanji was speaking I couldn’t help but notice the unease Jean was feeling in the room. He was constantly fidgeting, shifting his body weight and scratching his eyebrow. Not only that, but he has had his arms crossed the entire time we had been here. Suddenly he claimed that he had to go to the bathroom and rushed out of the room, arms still tucked deep into his chest.

Armin simply shrugged when Rivaille turned to him questioningly. I couldn’t help but feel like he was hiding something. Curious I claimed that I was tired and needed time to process the information. Hanji nodded, stating that they would continue in the morning. She told Armin to go with me, whispering something in his ear before he walked out of the room ahead of me. Isabel gave me a sympathetic look and waved goodbye.

When I caught up to Armin it was nothing but silence. No. We were not doing this again. As I was about to speak, he put a finger to my mouth.

“Like I said before, I’m sorry about ignoring you. But you have to realise that if I can help it I will not make you a monster like me.” I grabbed his arm away from my mouth and kept it in my grasp.

“One, you are not a monster, two, they would stop coming after me if I were one. Look, why can’t Hanji just get what she needs and then when she’s done turn me. Problem solved.”

“No! Not problem solved…” I tuned out again to what was being said as I saw Jean heading out of Utgard, mask and hood hiding most of his face. In his hands was what I presumed to be the thing that he had been hiding under his arms in the meeting room. I pushed Armin out of the way to go follow him. There was looking suspicious and then there was being suspicious. He was topping both. I felt a tug on my shirt before I hardly took even a step.

“Let it go Eren.” I wasn’t sure whether he was referring to pursuing his titan bound partner or becoming a titan, but either one I was not planning on letting go. I pulled out of his grasp and shot him death defying look. I turned and walked away before I did something I would regret. There was no way I would of been able to follow a stealth deviant like Jean anyway. I ignored the calls of my name from Armin as I turned the corner to the boys dorms. I was honestly completely done with all of this. Nothing made sense anymore. I didn’t know who was with me and who was against me. Who was telling me the truth and who was hiding things from me. I didn’t realise the hot tears streaming down my face until I came to run my keycard over the panel of my door and found my hands soaked with my own frustration.

I didn’t bother to close the door as I ran in and fell against the wall in a fit of blind rage. I found myself bashing my skull back against the concrete creating an echo of fury throughout the room. I pulled my knees up to my chest and laid my head against them.

Clenching the winged talisman in my hands I began to cry. Everything came out. The angst I had built up towards Armin, the fear that I forced myself to bottle up for everyone’s sake. The emptiness that came from leaving everything I had ever known. Having to face the probability of death everyday while not knowing for sure if my friends and family back at home truly know I’m okay or if even they’re okay. I didn’t try to stop the tears that flooded my eyes and burnt my throat. I just kept screaming and sobbing until I no longer had anything left inside of me.

When I finally opened my eyes, this light too was flickering above me. Only this time it was partially blocked by a crouching freckled Elfen titan. He grasped both my hands in his while he gently said, “You’re not okay, are you?” I shook my head and fell into his chest. He wrapped me tightly in his arms, rubbing my back softly. I sobbed into his shoulder as I tried to remember the Armin from before. The Armin that would help a dying animal at the drop of a hat. The Armin that read books in his room with his cute little nerd glasses. The Armin that won gold at the World Championships. The Armin from that night on the bridge, before he was taken, before all of this.

 

\---

 

**“Jean, you’re being ridiculous, just show me.”**

_“Alright, but you have to promise it’s between us alright, not even Armin can know.”_

**“I understand that. Just give me the documents… But- but it says…”**

_“Yea, that’s why he can’t know. It will crush them both.”_

**“This proves it, without Eren, Titans wouldn’t even exist.”**

_“Maybe I should give it to Hanji. She may be able to do -”_

**“No! I mean, why waste the effort, it’s just a statement it won’t do much.”**

_“I guess you’re right. Do you mind holding onto it. I don’t want Armin to see it when I turn our telepathic communications back on.”_

**“With pleasure.”**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For Anyone Who Is Confused With The Speech At the End...**
> 
> Annie (Bold)  
> Jean (Italics)


	28. A Crown of Roses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG I'M SUCH AN IDIOT! EVERYONE PLEASE DON'T FREAK OUT! I ONLY JUST REALISED THAT I COMPLETELY FORGOT TO PUT IN A CHAPTER. I FOUND A BLANK IN BETWEEN WHERE MARCO GOES TO HELP EREN AND WHEN EREN IS RUNNING BACK INTO THE FOREST. THIS WILL PROBABLY CLEAR UP SOME CONFUSION WITH EVERYTHING BETWEEN ARMIN AND ANNIE AND IT HIGHLIGHTS AN IMPORTANT PART WITH ISABEL. I AM SO SO SORRY, YOU DON'T HAVE TO READ THIS ONE IF YOU'VE READ AHEAD AND UNDERSTAND BUT THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HERE... PLEASE DON'T EAT ME...
> 
> Also I've decided to just leave the names with the speech at the end, a bit easier that way...

“Have you seen the way he looks at me Marco, he hates my guts.” As much as I loved having Marco around to help me, there was I one thing I wouldn’t stand for. False hope. It would be kidding myself to believe that after the way he had been treating me, that he held anything but angst towards me. Just the idea that he was keeping something as valuable as me being a Titan away from me, hung me from my vocal chords. I couldn’t fathom it. Sure I wasn’t a full Titan, but I could be. And he was keeping that away from me as well. 

 

It didn’t help when Isabel walked by my ajar door and heard me pathetically sobbing into the brunettes shoulder. Where Marco treated me like a close friend, Isabel reminded me a lot of myself. Ignoring the matching colour eyes and the ‘fierce smile’ as Ymir once called it, I could sense the same determination to help those she cares about. Despite this, she agreed with Marco one hundred percent. That Armin was only looking out for me by keeping this out of my knowledge. How on Earth was keeping distance protecting me in any shape or form. He wasn’t dangerous. He would never hurt me. At least that was what I thought. The Armin before would never hurt me. The Armin before, I trusted.

 

“Eren, he had every right to keep that from you, he was scared of how you would react.” Isabel chimed.

“What could I possibly do that would make him feel uncomfortable telling me.” 

“Exactly what you’re doing now.” She said bluntly. Marco stayed silent, giving a simple nod. To be honest, I may have overreacted a little, but I wouldn’t of acted quite as harshly if maybe he told me straight away and the information had come straight from him.

“Eren, you know what happened to me when I was younger right?” I nodded. Abandoned at four, found by Rivaille and Farlan at sixteen, what did that have to do with anything.

“Do you know why they left?” I shook my head. She crossed her legs on top of my mattress and wrapped her tail across her lap, patting it self-consciously. I could tell this information was not very comfortable for her to say.

 

“I was one of two. They had twins my parents, a boy and a girl. It was so long ago I can’t even remember my twin brothers name, but I loved him dearly. On our fourth birthday, Mama told us she was going to take us somewhere ‘Magical’. We were so thrilled.” She gave a light-hearted chuckled that seemed almost forced.

 

“That Magical place was where I was abandoned. The slums. They told me to wait by the orphanage while they took my brother to go get some lunch. I happily obliged and sat at the step. Five minutes passed, then ten. Then an hour. Then the sun set. I couldn’t understand why my brother’s face was filled with such sadness when my mama tugged him away. That’s when I realised they weren’t coming back.” The three of us didn’t make a sound for what seemed like ages. I didn’t realise the warm tears running down my cheeks until I heard the soft patter of them falling to the ground. I quickly wiped them away wondering when they had started.

 

“I’m sorry but I still don’t understand.” I finally said. Isabel went to to interject but Marco raised his hand. 

“Appearance versus reality. Her mother seemed like she loved her, but instead left her. Armin may look like he is trying to distance yourself from him. Do you truly believe that’s what he wants?” I bit my lip in thought. What did he really want?

 

“I’ve seen the way you look at him.” He alleged. “Everyone can see how much you care for him, why not just tell him?” He rose to his feet and put a hand on my shoulder.

“What about you!” I found myself exclaiming. He pulled back his hand in shock. It was now Isabel’s turn to remain in awkward silence.

“I’ve seen the way you check-out Jean everytime he walks past. Haven’t you noticed him doing the same to you?” I questioned, lowering my voice as to not seem like I was letting out my frustration on others again. He raised his hand to the back of his neck, giving me a lopsided smile.

“Oh, he would never see me like that. There wouldn’t be any point in saying any-”

“He practically has his eyes focused on you twenty-four-seven. And have you seen the way he always pushes me away when we get close. As in physically.” He looked to the ground, a thick red covering his cheeks. I caught Isabel’s smile in the corner of my eye.

 

“Marco, in circumstance like these, we don’t know when our last days will be. If you don’t tell him soon, you may never get a-” I stopped before I could continue as Marco gave me a sneaky grin and crossed his arms over his chest. 

“A chance to.” He finished. Isabel laughed at my dumbfounded expression. As much as I believed my statement, I couldn’t muster up the courage to really follow it. I was all talk in that sense.

“Guess we both have some things to catch up on, yea?” I nodded. I pulled Marco and Isabel up and wrapped them both in a hug. Marco was the first to pull out. I went to follow him as he made his way out of my doorway but Isabel grabbed my wrist, telling Marco that we would see him later. He tipped his head forward and waved at us as he disappeared down the hall. 

 

I looked back at Isabel who no longer had a smile on her face.

“I’m sorry about what-” I was interrupted by her paw in front of my face.

“That’s not what I’m here about. What Marco said was right you need to tell him. There are some things that you really shouldn’t keep from people.” I had no idea where she was going with this. She didn’t need to give a recap of what I had just heard. She blew out a deep breath and continued.

“I have never seen anyone put their life on the line for someone so much as I’ve seen Armin do for you. You claim he’s changed but you haven’t really lived a day in his shoes as he is right now. His will to risk death for you should be enough to show that he has put his heart on the line to be broken. He’s letting himself become prone to a weakness that not all of us can handle. Cherish that. Most will only ever make that mistake once.” I stayed still as she wrapped her arms around my neck, kissing my cheek lightly as she pushed away. She walked to the door and held onto the frame, he tail swishing behind her.

“Just... try and remember that.” She then disappeared down the hall in the same direction as Marco.

 

When was it that it sunk in that Armin had changed. When I first saw him under the hood? When his eyes shifted purple? No. It was when he pulled out those guns in the community centre. When I first saw him kill. But even so, was it really that different. He did it in order to protect us. My mind entered its own montage of when Armin put his life on the line to protect me, a realisation of how blinded I was to his care.

 

_ \--- _

_ “DO YOU TRUST ME!” _

_ “NO I DON’T TRUST YOU!” I screamed as he sped up towards the wall. We were only inches away from the wall when I gust of air rushed past us and a hole was blown in the wall. Armin did not hesitate to jump through the wall and continue his escape through what looked to be a dark abandoned warehouse. I laughed nervously as I looked behind me and saw the two officers had gotten knocked off their bikes and were calling back up.  _

_ “Well you should Eren, I only want to protect you, please just understand that… _

\---

_ Armin’s thumb made contact with my blood. Only a few seconds after he was on the ground at my feet clutching his stomach. He looked as though he was in pain.  _

_ “Armin what’s wrong?” _

_ “No- nothing. Don’t worry about it.” He opened his eyes which were violently flashing from a violet to blue.  _

_ “You don’t look fine Ar?” The flickering of his iris’ stopped and looked up to the sky, gently letting out an ‘oh no’ after a short while. _

_ “What?” _

_ “I told you it’s nothing. I just- , I can’t let you leave. I promise when it is clear that you are safe you can go back. I can go back to being dead okay. Just please. Don’t leave.” _

\---

_ “Jesus Eren, you look like your bones are going to shake out of your skin.” He looked outside then back at me. His look of contemplation resulted in both his hands crossing at the bottom of his shirt and was lifted smoothly off his head. He laid down next to me shirtless, his face inches away from mine. Damn, did he have a nice body. _

_ “Don’t worry you’ll warm up soon” He lifted his arm gesturing me to come closer and I understood, quickly accepting his offer. I shuffled into his arms, letting one hand wrap around my waist, the other holding my head close to his beating heart. It was that steady pulse that was a reminder to me that he was still human. He may have been turned into something different but that was a human heartbeat whether he believed it or not.  _

\---

 

He really did care about me. I had to set things right. I sprinted out of my room towards his. There was no time to collect together the words I wanted to say. What I did know was that I had to say I was sorry. Sorry for not trusting him. Sorry for pushing him away. Sorry for believing he placed no value on human life. Sorry for not telling him my feelings sooner. Sorry that-

 

My senses shut down. Everything went cold. The sight of Armin being pinned down on the bed, shirtless. The sight of Annie’s lips connected with his as she held his arms above his head, she too without a shirt. I never did learn to knock did I? I took a step back slowly, only being able to whimper his name and a short “I’m sorry” before I bolted. 

 

\---

 

**Armin: “Get off me you fucking tart.”**

_ Annie: “Oh C’mon now, wouldn’t you prefer a little light to you Shadowstrike.” _   
****

**Armin: “DON”T CALL ME THAT! ANNIE I’VE NEVER LIKED YOU LIKE THAT! THIS IS SEXUAL HARASSMENT!”**

_ Annie: “Oooh, here he comes…” _ _   
_ ****

**Armin: “What are you- Mm!... EREN WAIT! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!”**

_ Annie: “You can’t possibly tell me you still want him after that! Not like he will want you either.” _

**Armin: “Annie, if you ever talk to me, or him, again, I will rip your eyes out and shove them down your throat so you can see my hands rip your stomach open. EREN! PLEASE!”**

_ Annie: “Fine, if that’s how you want to play, then I have no choice. Sorry Armin, but you had your chance.” _


	29. When Two Sides of One Collide

I could feel my chest constricting from the inside out. Every muscle in my body throbbing as I pushed past everyone that was in my way. Everything was failing me, my thoughts, my body, my will to go on. Everything, except for the tears. I refused to cry again. If this was what he wanted then this was what he got. He wanted to avoid me so he could fuck Annie every chance he got, fine. I wouldn’t stop him. He didn’t want me coming to Utgard because he feared I would interfere with their relationship, he could go ahead. I won’t fall. I didn’t need him to be my parachute. I could catch myself. I didn’t need him. Without thinking, I jumped down the runway and into the forest. I continued to sprint, unsure of where I was going. 

 

I was stopped in my flee by a strong grip on my neck. My necklace had caught onto a branch. That damn necklace. Always getting in the way of everything.

_ Promise me, promise me you will never take this off… promise me… _

 

I clasped the wings in my hand and let my freedom go. My freedom of being with him. Through the twisted nether of the branches into the rushing stream, I let the talisman fall. It didn’t matter anymore. “ _ Eren wait!” _ I heard him scream in my mind. No, he was not manipulating his way out of this one. I continued to run through the forest. My face stinging from the shrubs and branches that cut my face. Ironic. Last time this had happened I was running towards him. I suddenly felt selfish. Why was I running away? I should be happy for him. If he was happy, then I was happy. But if that was the case, why did it feel like someone was ripping a crown of roses out of my heart.

 

My legs stopped pushing. I stopped at the cliff edge looking down the pitifall drop. That same sense of guilt that clenched my stomach overwhelmed me as heights always did. Memories of that night on top of Trost tower filled my mind once again. If Connie was only a minute later then he was, I wouldn’t be standing on this edge. I wouldn’t be filled with this guilt. My heart wouldn’t be feeling like it was ripping in two. 

“EREN!” I knew it was him as soon as he screamed it. That sweet, yet powerful voice that I knew so well yet didn’t know at all. I was convinced Marco was right but now I didn’t know. He forced my shoulders around to face him, his eyes shifting from purple to blue. That beautiful sapphire colour I could never get enough of. You couldn’t help but be entranced as you stared into them.

 

“Eren where’s your necklace?” He asked worriedly. I broke my gaze away from his eyes.

“Eren you promised you wouldn’t take it off. You need to always keep it with you. How am I supposed to -”

“Why do you care?” I interrupted. “You’ve been avoiding me for too long. If you want me to leave so badly then fine, you get your wish. I’ll be out of here by morning.” Armin stood there eyes wide. I expected at least a glimmer of satisfaction within him but all I saw was shock. Then despondency. 

“That’s not what I want.” He uttered in a quiet voice.

“Yea I know what you want. And it’s fine. If you're happy with her then I’m happy too.”

“What?! No! I’m not interested in Annie, I never have been!” He exclaimed. 

“Then who  _ are _ you interested in Armin?!” It was not a question I wanted him to answer. Whether it was what I wanted to hear or not it was only going to make things harder. But the words just blurted out without my self-control. Despite this I didn’t expect him to not answer at all. Instead his eyes turned back to a bright purple and he suddenly looked very worried.

 

“Get behind me!” He whispered in a demanding tone. 

“I don’t hear anything Armin. Don’t try to change the subject -”   
“Shhhh.”

“Are you kidding me right now, now is not the time to -”   
“Quiet! I need to hear -” Just as I was about to retaliate again, the sound of a projectile coming towards us snapped me out of it. Then came the agonising screech of my protector collapsing to the ground at my feet. Steam was rising quickly from where he was clenched over. That’s when I saw his blood dripping to the ground mixed with a thick blue liquid, sizzling in an oozing concoction in the dirt.

 

A loud hiss echoed through the wind along with rustling through the trees and shrubs. I went to swipe my hand over my BA when I realised that I had left it at Utgard. Armin let out a loud grunt as he pulled the arrow out of his stomach and chucked it to the side. I went to lift him up but he kept pushing me behind him. He slowly rose to his feet while chanting in latin, attempting to heal the large gash in his stomach. I knew that it would take a lot more than that to heal a wound from that blue titan poison. 

 

I saw Armin’s hands run over where his BA usually was as well. Nothing apparated into his hands. We were completely unarmed. That would've been okay, if three Scaled titans hadn’t jumped from the rustle in the bushes. Thier deathly snarl forced us to retreat back, until just my heels hung over the edge. We had no choice but to fight with the weapons we had. The weapons we had trained with since we were kids.

 

Armin pushed me in front of him then quickly somersaulted over the top of me so I was still behind him but away from the edge. He didn’t bother to turn and look at me as he ordered “Go, I can handle them.” I knew he wasn’t going to be in control for long. That once his eyes turned into that full possessed glow, that those monsters wouldn’t stand a chance despite his injures. Everything inside of me told me to listen to him. To run, leave, like I was going to do anyway. But then my instincts kicked in. Like hell, I was going to leave him to fight these monsters alone. Without a second thought, I charged ahead with my head held high and delivered a flying punch straight to the Scaled titan who had the bow straight into his temple, sending all three toppling down like bowling pins. The impact stung and ached my fists. I peered down to them and saw that bruises were already forming under the small trickle of red that flowed down my fingers and to my wrists. 

 

Armin shot me a pleading look. I grinned at him and held up my fist. Even if I was mad at him, we always got through it in the past. No matter what happened he would always be my best friend. And friends never leaves friends behind. I was being selfish and it sucked that it took something as stupid as catching him with Annie for me to realise that. He told me that he was never interested in her. It may of seemed naive but in that moment I believed him. Because trust was being sure of what we hope for in a person and certain of what we didn’t see them do. It may have a taken a while for me to realise that but I had full faith and trust in Armin. This was bigger than us. I promised him that I would find a cure. I promised I would never leave him. I promised I would always protect him. That was what I intended to do. Up until my last dying breath, I would fight.

 

“Like hell, I’m leaving you.” I finally snickered. Armin eyes, still a vibrant purple no longer held fear, but determination. He smiled and nodded, mouthing an ‘okay’ before quickly switching his gaze onto the three fallen titans. The titan’s bow had somehow left it’s grasp, hopefully falling off the edge of the cliff when I had struck at him.

 

“ _ I’ll get the two at the back, you get the one in front.” _ He stated in my head.

“Sounds good, let’s do it.” As soon as the monsters were on their feet, we advanced again. This time I went  for a sweeping kick to the back of it’s knees. It jumped over my kick and instead swerved it’s hips, beating its tail straight into my stomach. I cursed as I tumbled back into a tree. On all fours it came charging towards me with a growl. At the last moment I rolled to the side, making it head butt into the tree. The leaves rustled and fell slowly from the impact. I jumped to my feet and quickly delivered a downward kick to it’s spine making it fall flat to the ground. I took the opportunity to grab a large fallen branch from the ground. I jumped on top of the creature and began to choke it, using the stick around it’s thick neck. He struggled to break free, and the thick hide was making it difficult for me to stay on top of it. 

 

A blistering heat suddenly emerged from behind me. I turned to quickly to see Armin was in a ball of flame hurling firebolts at the titans. I had forgotten that even though Armin didn’t have weapons, he could still call on the powers of the elements. But it worried me. Last time he did this he had gone berserk. Possessed in that full titan glow with fangs and claws. I had to trust that he knew what he was doing. But that second of distraction was all it took for the titan under me to knock me off of him and instead crawl on top of me. 

 

The beast opened it’s mouth and roared into me. I desperately fidgeted my body, trying to grab onto anything I could to alleviate myself of this unbearable weight crushing me but I couldn’t move. Now that it was so close I could see the intricate detail of it’s fine curved teeth, the way it’s oozing saliva dripped like melting water down icicles of a cave. What was strange about it though was it’s vibrant blue colour. It was the same consistency and colour as titan poison. If it was infact titan poison did that mean that they were inseparable to it? 

 

Then the weight was gone. A strong wind replaced it, pushing the mass off of me. I sat myself up quickly to see Armin was pinned down by the two Scaled as they hissed into his face. He had steam coming from everywhere around him. His eyes shifting in and out of the magenta glow to the violet purple as he held out his hand in my direction to keep the wind flowing.  _ Why isn’t he saving himself? _ I crawled up onto my feet and sprinted towards him. I readied myself to knock the titans of of him but the Scaled I had been fighting before pushed my back from the corner of my eye, knocking me down. I was sent rolling along the harsh damp ground, various twigs sending cuts down my legs and arms. My muscles shook as I forced my defeating eyes to stay open and I pushed myself up on my elbows to look back.

 

The titans had Armin by his neck as he desperately tried to punch his kick out of the beast hold. I swear I heard one of the titans laugh as Armin was thrown like a rag doll into a tree. I stared wide eyes as I noticed that a large branch was protruding out of his stomach, leaving him speared there like a chunk of meat at a butcher's shop. His eyes remained violet but stared at nothing. His head hung low and his jaw hung open. At first I thought he was dead, but his chest still heaved violently as he attempted to take breaths. Blood fell from his mouth in massive clumps. 

 

Before I even knew what I was doing, I was at the titans feet. Desperately punching and kicking at the thick hide. They didn’t move. Only laughed at my attempt to incur any damage on the monsters. I was then picked up by the throat by the same Scaled and hung in mid air. I choked for air. My head felt heavy and limbs felt weak. My hands clenched around the scaled wrists, trying to pry the grip of of my begging throat. I felt his shoulder shift as he was about to throw me, but instead he fell to the ground. Steam flittered from the back of his neck as his eyes grew lifeless. 

 

The titan's grip faltered and I instantly tore away the claws, sucking in all the air I could in heavy coughs. I looked up to see Jean with violet eyes, chest heaving up and down heavily. I was quickly pulled up to a stand by someone behind me grabbing under my shoulders and hoisting me up. Isabel stood there with her cat slit eyes, breathing heavy as well. As soon as I was on my feet, they ran towards the other Scaled titans, slashing with their weapons, aiming for the nape of their neck like the one slowly dissolving next to me. That’s when I saw Marco, Rivaille and Hanji also running up to help. I should've been grateful but the only thing going through my mind was,  _ don’t end up like Armin _ . 

 

I turned to that the blond boy was still shivering on the branch but his eyes had closed. I ran up to see if I could somehow get him off the branch without injuring him even more. Damn it. If only I was a Titan and I could do those latin healing incantations I could ease his suffering. The grunts and yells of my friends and allies fighting the Scaled behind me distracted me for just a moment before a strong force pulled me back. 

 

But it wasn’t a someone that did it this time. It was a something. A powerful gust that came from Armin as his eyes entered the full possessed glow. I watched as his hair flew in different directions making it look unruly. His skin shifting from into a dull shade of grey. His fangs pointing out of his lips sharper and longer than ever before. I no longer saw Armin. I didn’t recognise him anymore. This was more venomous than he ever had become. His nails grew into thick claws that grasped the thick branch in his stomach, snapping it off as he pulled himself off of it. As soon as the branch had left him, the wound closed almost as quickly as he was thrown. A violent purple aura surrounded him, making him look even more infernal. Then he roared. With all his might he sent spheres of shadow bolts towards the two Scaled titans. 

 

The Scaled looked even more scared then I was. He got onto all fours and ran towards the two titans like the clawed would. Only, he was definitely not in control. Everyone backed away towards me as we all watched Armin massacre the two remaining titans. Limbs flew in all directions. Blood splattered our face and the the trees around us. Jean had collapsed to the ground in tears of pain, gritting his teeth, trying to quell the cries of agony he was feeling. He would of been in a horrible state if he had to feel exactly what Armin was feeling. 

 

You wouldn’t of been able to tell what the original titan was, they were cut up that much. Organs and entrails were splattered everywhere. Rivaille pulled Isabel in towards and covered her eyes with his wings as she sniffled into his shoulder. He stroked her hair, pleading her to shush her sobs. Hanji and Marco stood shell-shocked at the scene. Armin was still hacking at the already dead titan when he was finished with the others. I had seen enough. This was too much. We all thought so. And that became evident when Rivaille finally decided to glide over to Armin to try and snap him out of it. Jean yelled out to him to stop but it was too late. Armin raised his hand and struck at Rivaille. He only just barely dodged it. We all gasped. Isabel put a hand to her mouth as she realised what was happening.

 

“Marco! Do something!” Jean yelled. 

“I’m trying, nothing's getting through to him.” He whimpered as he held Jean’s hand trying to soothe both him and Armin. As soon as Hanji heard this he went over to help Rivaille as Armin continued to strike at him. He was truly losing control. Jean also got up to help, ignoring Marco’s pleas to stay. Both of them were in tears. As I saw everyone was failing to control him, I felt I had to do something. I sprinted with all the energy I had left to the possessed Armin. I knew this wasn’t him. I had to make him see that. 

 

“GET BACK JAEGER!” Rivaille yelled at me. I ignored him and continued to move closer to Armin.

“Armin! Armin it’s me!” He twitched his gaze over to me and just stood there. A deer in headlights. I was too afraid to move, fearing I would scare him off. I took a small step forward with my hands raised defensively. 

 

“Armin this isn’t you.” I couldn’t tell if the subtle twitches he was making was him trying to push himself back into consciousness or his animalistic side taking over. I could feel his breathing becoming heavier as I came closer, but he remained still. His eyes, though still a full glow, began to dim down. I was within arm's reach of him, when a twig suddenly snapped underneath my feet. His eyes shot back as he immediately struck in front of him sending a jolt of pain through my arm. I let out a hurl of excruciating pain as I held where he had made impact. Blood trickled from where his claws dug in and that familiar ache of bones being shattered made my whole body quiver and muscles tense.

 

With his hand still raised, his breathing suddenly died down and his brows unfurrowed. His eyes shifted back to its beautiful blue, that was now filled with salted tears. The claws retracted as well as his fangs and his skin returned to it’s pale life-filled tone. His hair settled back to his shoulders, still in an unruly state. He looked down at my wound then at his raised hand. He clenched his wrist with his other hand and looked around in fear. Fear of what he had done. His breath hitched and the tears fell. He retreated back, slowly at first but then turned and ran. I held out my hand, yelling for him to stop, but he didn’t turn around. Isabel held me back as I went to go after him. We let him go.

 

\---

 

_ Petra: “It’s working just as planned.” _

**Oruo: “Umm, I still don’t understand what this achieves Petra?”**

_ Petra: “That’s because you’re an idiot Oruo!” _

**Oruo: “But weren’t we going to get Annie to just capture Eren? I don’t understand how this is working.”** **  
**

_ Petra: “We have a change of plans, there’s no need for that anymore.” _ _   
_ ****

**Oruo: “Huh?”**

_ Petra: “All we needed was to get Armin out of the picture. Without him, Eren’s defenceless. He’s as good as ours now.” _

**Oruo: “But what does Annie get in return for this?”**

_ Petra: “What she deserves.” _


	30. Goodbye, Again and Again

The atmosphere had turned grey with uncertainty and fear. Everyone was on their toes. Unsettling was an understatement to how the tension made me feel. Though I wasn’t sure if everyone at Utgard had this built up stress due to the recent attacks. I knew it wasn’t the cause of mine. It was the fact that Armin was still locked in that cell.

 

By the time the others had dragged me back to Utgard they put me straight into my room and got Isabel wait with me while Marco healed my arm that Armin slashed at. I knew it wasn’t his fault. He couldn’t control himself, I only blamed myself for pushing him. Isabel did me a huge favour by tapping into Rivaille’s head while she was with me so she could see everything that was happening. Perks of being titan bound. She told me that Hanji and Rivaille finally found Armin underground in the prison sector. His eyes were still flashing but he held control. Apparently he handed the chain and locks to Hanji and pleaded her to lock him up. She didn’t do it at first so then Armin turned to Rivaille. Reluctantly, he agreed.

 

It’s been three days since then. Everyone knew about what happened, about why he was down there. That’s why they were scared. It suddenly hit them that it could happen to anyone of them. They didn’t want to turn. It was noticeable in the way that everyone quickly turned at the slightest abnormal noise. Even the people training were holding back. Hardly any wore the iconic Titan purple in their iris, too frightened to go past neutral phase.

 

I had asked several times if I could go down there. There wasn’t a moment where I wasn’t worrying about him. Occassionaly I would wait up the top of the underground stairwell, hoping that just once he would ask for me. In the times I had been waiting there I had seen Marco, Jean, Krista and even Isabel go past to see him. With each one of them, within a few minutes, they had come back with little to no results. Jean seemed to take this the hardest. 

 

“It’s like a thousand needles are being poked into his brain.” He told me.

“I can’t believe how well he’s truly taking this.” He seemed very distant. Very self-conscious. He didn’t seem like the arrogant person I had come to know. 

“How often do you tap into his head to feel that?”

“Enough to know that he’s suffering. He needs to see you, he’s just scared. Give him time, he’ll come around. Hanji’s helping him through it anyway.” The clop of hooves on the iron flooring made us spin on our heels. Marco emerged, wielding his twin crescent blades in each hand. 

 

“Hey, you ready Jean?” Jean nodded, grabbing Marco’s arm and kissing him quickly on the lips before saying he would meet him at the runway when he was ready. I could feel Jean’s uneasiness fall instantly in Marco’s presence. I was happy for them. It was soothing to know one of us had it worked out. Marco stayed there smiling like an idiot as Jean walked off. When his footsteps could no longer be heard down the hall, his smile fell and he turned to me.

“You sure you’re okay Eren?” I forced a smile.

“Yea. I see you and Jean are really close. I’m happy for you guys.” Marco’s cheeks turned pink.

“Thanks Eren, hey it will work out for you too.” I crossed my arms and leant against the wall with a thud.

“I just wish I knew what was happening in there. What they’re doing to him, how he’s going. I feel so useless just standing here.” Marco clucked his tongue and scraped his hooves slowly against the iron.

 

“Well, I know that Hanji is trying to make something to slow down his phases. From what I’ve seen they’re not really working. I know they aren’t going to put him down, not yet.” I cringed at the way he worded the inevitable. He thought he was like Thomas. It would of been easier if he just told it like it was, but he was too gentle to say something like that.

“Like Jean said, give it time. He’s not going to be in there forever. I promise you nothing will happen to him.”  _ No, don’t promise me that _ I thought.  _ That’s not a promise that can be made. _

“Hey, you go have fun with your boyfriend, don’t let me spoil your mood.” I finally suggested. He didn’t need to feel the burden of my problems. He nodded and gave me a quick hug before literally trotting off in the direction Jean went. 

 

When he was gone I bashed my fist against the iron walls and fell to the ground.

“Why am I so useless!” I muttered to myself. If only I hadn’t gone out. If only I trusted Armin enough to know that he wasn’t into Annie. Annie. I hadn’t seen her since that day. She hadn’t been at training and I hadn’t seen her go past to see Armin. Though I did see Hitch around. Why did I have to act so stupidly? I still hadn’t truly apologised to Armin like I had said I would. I would've given anything to go and see him right now.

 

In that moment, I wished once again that I was a titan. I wanted to be Titan bound to him. I wanted to see through his eyes. I wanted to take away his pain. It was not fair that this happened to him. Of all people, why did it have to be him. I knew this definitely wasn’t the time to convince him to do it, but I knew at some point, like Isabel said, it would have to be done.

 

If I couldn’t take away his pain, I should atleast have the chance to relate to it. My heart was clouded in a mist. A mist of regret. I had to somehow clear it. Regret would never have remained if I had just blew it out when it had started to form. I was dragging everyone around me into it. It wasn’t fair to them, it wasn’t fair to me and it sure as hell wasn’t fair to Armin.

 

The echo of boots coming down the dark hallway pushed me out of the lingering thought. A pair of dark wings suddenly came into my view of the metal ground. I peered up to see the short dark-haired Titan looking down on me. 

 

His eyes were bloodshot and the bags under them looked horrible. His dark wings seemed uneven, with noticeable feathers drooping and hanging on end. Even his hair was in a matted state, and he had patches of dirt all over his bare chest and arms. It was an unusual contrast to the clean freak I was used too. He looked more sad and worried than angry.

 

“He wants to see you.”

 

\---

 

Rivaille led me silently down the dimly lit corridor, the reverb of our footsteps causing me more anxiety than I needed. The torches flickered as we walked past each one, their warmth biting at the back of my neck each time. As I walked past the abandoned cellars, I couldn’t help but wonder what the last thought that went through the previous occupants minds were. Were they still sane when they had died or did they become the monster they were intended to be. The rusted bars were flaking, as was my mind as I continued to process the possible reasoning behind why Armin all of a sudden wanted to see me. 

 

Rivaille stopped when we came to an old metal door at the end of the corridor. It too had a dark shade of rust covering it. The man beside me let out a heavy sigh as he undid the various locks on the door.

“Don’t push him to say anything. he’s been through enough as it is.” He claimed in an almost protective way before he slowly pushed open the door with a loud creak. He stepped to the side and gestured me in. There wasn’t much difference atmosphere wise to the corridor I was just walking through. Burning torches still held as the only source of light and the bars still looked centuries old. Hanji was based off to the side, wearing a long white lab coat. She smiled at me as she placed a syringe into some unknown liquid.

 

“He’s just over there.” Before I went on ahead she pulled me in closer to her so that her burgundy fur tickled my cheek.

“I’ve given him a dose of something I’ve been working on to tone down his shifts. He’s very exhausted and probably won’t say much. Just be patient. I also don’t know how effective it is. This is pretty much just a test to see what adjustments should be made.” She then patted me on the back and pushed me slowly towards the square cell. The chain that wrapped around the door and hung to the ceiling were so thick I didn’t even think they could be melted off. There was a warped padlock on the metal chains as well, but no keyhole or anyway I could see to open it. Just how long was he planning on staying in there?

 

He looked so small, I didn’t even realise he was there. The door creaked once more as Rivaille closed it behind me. I took a short step forward before calling out his name gently. Though I could only see the side of his face, his blond bangs jumped as he rose his head quickly. He was sitting against the wall, looking at the opposite side with one knee to his chest, the other lying in front of him. It was horrible seeing him like this. So vulnerable. So torn. I just wanted to hold him and tell him everything would be alright. 

 

He slowly turned to look at me, his blue orbs intertwining with my gaze. I took another step forward. Then another until I could grab the bars that separated me and him. As soon as my cold clammy hands hit the poles, he backed up violently. Like a scared puppy in the store, he shivered slightly. He turned his gaze away from mine.

 

“Can- can you back-up.” I nodded unsure, and then took another step back. I sat down where I was and continued to look at the broken boy in front of me. I thought maybe seeing me could snap him out of it. That he could regain control again when he saw me. Then again, it was seeing me that put him in there.

“I-” We cut each other off saying the same thing. 

“No, you go first.” I insisted. He nodded and crawled closer to the bars so that he was about the same distance I was from them.

 

He licked his lips and looked down to the ground.

“Do- Do you understand now… why I don’t want to turn you.” I couldn’t do anything but nod. 

“This… this isn’t worth it. The power, the senses… it isn’t worth the pain. You have to realise that.” He explained in a quiet weary voice. They were almost spoken in raspy whispers. It was as if the toll on him locked in here had stripped him of not only his outer appearance, but his inner vibrancy.

 

“I- I’m so sorry Eren. For what happened. I never wanted to hurt you. I can’t-”

“No, no Armin it wasn’t your fault!”

“But it was.” I became shocked at the tone he now possessed. It was that same demonic sound he had when he was in full titan glow. Even his eyes shifted into it’s violet. His features like mine, became overwhelmed in a state fear. The two titans behind me went tense.

“This was a mistake. You should go.” He whispered into a sob. He then turned around so that his back was towards me. 

 

“What! No, Armin, if it’s anyone’s fault it’s mine.” I found myself getting closer and closer to the barrier separating us. I grasped the bars in my hands and screamed through the gap. I heard Rivaille yell at me from behind telling me to get back but I ignored him.

“I shouldn’t of left Utgard in the first place. I should've trusted you. It’s me that’s in the wrong here. If I was a more understanding friend, I could’ve-” I was cut off by a loud snarl and a hand lashing out through the bars. I jumped back fast enough that he didn’t hit me but his fangs were still bared and his claws were out. As his eyes died back to normal, a single tear fell down his cheek from widened eyes. He stared down at the ground in defeat. 

 

“Don’t ever say that Eren. You… you are not the monster here. You never were. I was the one that dragged you into this mess. You had every right to hate me. You  _ have _ every right to hate me…” I felt myself breathing heavily as I tried to refrain myself from firing back and from breaking down in front of him.

“Forget it Eren, there is no point in placing your trust in a monster like me. You’re better off without me.” He claimed silently. Two paws lifted me up from behind. Hanji placed her palm on my back and led me out the door. Before it closed behind me, I had to say one last thing. Something that I felt he had to know.

“Armin.” I waited for him to look up at me again. “You were never a monster to me.” With that, I turned and left. 

 

\---

 

Utgard was just as uncomfortable as it was before I went down there, if not more so. Though it was a lot more silent then I remembered, the subtle arguing and the nonexistent grunts of those training just made my stomach churn all that more. Where was everyone? I was heading to my room when I felt a paw grab me tightly. 

 

“WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!” Isabel screamed. Her eyes were in their titan form, making her seem feral. That’s when I noticed the distant sound of banging and shouting coming from the training arena. It wasn’t arguing I was hearing, it was screaming.

“I was just with Armin. Why what’s happened?” I said in a panic.

 

“YOU NEED TO HELP!” She didn’t have to say anything more. I ran as fast as I could behind her, the sound of people being thrown against walls and the clashing of swords frightening me even more.When we entered the doorway to the training arena, it was chaos once again. 

 

Steam fluttered in the air. A mound of bodies all going forward towards a singular spot, only to be blown back seconds afterwards. I saw a flash of white in the corner of my eye and noticed Krista had her bow poised straight towards that spot. She pulled back the string with three arrows loaded as she hovered in the air. Before she got a chance to shoot though, a bolt of fire was shot back at her, searing the edge of her wing sending her crashing to the ground screaming. 

“KRISTA!” I ran as fast as I could towards her but, Ymir was already there in a flash ready to catch her as she fell into her arms. 

 

“What’s happening!?” I screamed over the mayhem.

“It’s Annie. She’s gone mental. I have no idea what she’s going on about” Ymir started as she attempted to heal Krista’s burning wing through her chants. I remembered what she could do. The way Annie enveloped me in that ring of fire. It chilled me to say the least. “She keeps going on about an ‘Unborn’ and how ‘It’s time he face his fate.’” I felt my skin go pale. Isabel didn’t hesitate as she heard this to pull out her BA and go straight after her. 

 

I should've stopped her but I was frozen in a pit of fear. In spite of routine, I looked down at my chest to see if my necklace was beginning to glow. That’s when I remembered, it was gone. I had thrown it away in my fit. There was no way Armin could know what was happening. Jean and Marco had left earlier so even tapping into his mind wouldn’t inform him of anything. There was no way that Armin could know of the uproar that was occurring. This was something I had to face on my own. And I wasn’t going to have people get hurt because of me anymore.

 

I ran into an open spot where I knew she would be able to distinguish me from everyone else.

“ANNIE! I KNOW IT’S ME YOU WANT! STOP HURTING EVERYONE ELSE AND FACE ME LIKE THE BITCH YOU ARE!” Immediately the fires stopped. All of the titans turned to me in shock. Then out of the blue, they were all pushed to the sides of the room by a strong wind, leaving Annie in the middle of the arena smirking. With a click of her fingers, a wall of flames formed into a ring around us. I heard Isabel call out my name from behind the searing heat, but there was no way any of them would be able to get through the flickering arena. 

 

“You’re an idiot. Brave. But an absolute idiot.” She snickered. 

“Funny, I was going to say the same about you.” I retorted. Her smile faded, replaced with a scowl. 

“Let’s see how good you’ve really gotten.” Her hands withdrew behind her. As she pushed them forward a bolt of fire was sent my way. I dodged it with ease, but then another one came, and then another. I was tiring quickly from trying to avoid the bolts.  _ You’re waiting too long Jaeger… intercept it. _ Rivaille’s voice rang in my head at the memory of my training. That was it. I had to move forward, otherwise she would just keep going.

 

I continued to dodge the bolts as I armed my katana and charged head on into Annie. She stopped firing her bolts of flame and side stepped out of the way as I striked at her stomach. A gush of wind sent me flying onto my hands and knees. I quickly turned, weapon in hand to make sure she wouldn’t get me from behind but she kicked the sword out of my hand. I watched as the blade vanished past the flames. A strong ache then pushed itself into my chest as Annie's’ foot made contact with my sternum. 

 

I doubled over in a horrible coughing fit. She squated down and placed a finger on my chin, lifting my head up to face her. Her eyes… were normal. With only a glint of evil, they were the same blue as they always were. No hint of devilish violet. She was maintaining full control as she tortured me. She chuckled deeply, striking her hand straight to my throat, hoisting me in the air. Rather than keeping me there, she threw me down hard on the ground. The back of my head slapped the concrete hard. My ears resonated from the impact

 

My head lifted only slightly to see Annie standing over me. I couldn’t move. Her mouth formed words but I could not hear them, all that was left was a violent ring in my head that paralysed my entire body. I watched as she slowly pulled out a knife from her boot, placing it in her mouth. She then placed both of her knees on the sides my hips locking me in place. With one hand, she pulled my hair to the ground, the other took the knife from her teeth. 

 

Was my body really giving up now? After all that I had been through, my mind has finally decided to end it here? Everything flew in slow motion. My hearing began to clear up so I could now hear muffled voices. Annie leant the knife on my chest and leant down next to my ear.

“You did this to me. And now you’re going to pay.” She let go of my hair and placed both hands on the knife, holding it high above her head.

“This is what should’ve happened… Years ago!” 

“ANNIE!” Annie became shocked, turning her head quickly. She almost dropped the knife in the process. I couldn’t hear the voice properly enough to distinguish its owner. But whoever it was, it caused her to panic. Without any time to spare she regained grip on the knife and waited no longer to bring it down.

 

The pain wasn’t as bad as I had thought. The feeling of the metal going into my stomach and then back out, I imagined would be the most painful, agonising experience of my life. But it was numbing. Perhaps it didn’t hit me what had happened through my already half-conscious mind. The one thing that was different though was that I could feel the blood. I felt it seeping through the wound. I saw Annie smile before the heat around me vanished and the flames died down. The blond vanished from my sight. 

 

“NO!” It was closer now. That voice. That voice I knew so well. How did he get out? I saw the chains, I saw the locks. There was no way. But there he was, running over to me as fast as he could, his beautiful sapphire eyes filled with tears. His blond bangs stuck to his sweat and tear-stained face as he picked me up and held me in his lap. He looked down at my wound and immediately put pressure onto it. It was becoming harder and harder to breath. I felt the metallic liquid rise up into my throat and seep through my lips. Armin began to chant in Latin frantically. It held no grace like it usually did.

“No, Eren. Stay with me!”

 

“Armin, it’s not going to work. I just gave you that serum. You’re abilities won’t work.” I heard Hanji claim from behind me. I was really going to die. Armin continued to chant despite Hanji’s claim. I forced my hand to his cheek, pulling his hair behind his ear so I could see those eyes again. Thoigh my vision began to fall into a blind montage of black, I forced them awake.

“Armin, it’s okay.” I rasped out. Tears continued to spill from his eyes. He removed one blood-stained hand from my wound and placed it over mine. 

“I’m sorry, I broke my promise.” I choked out. 

“SOMEONE GET MARCO!” He yelled out to no one in particular.

“Armin…” A soft voice said beside him. “Healing is not going to do anything for him now.” 

“NO, I’M NOT LETTING HIM DIE!” I smiled up at him, bringing my thumb to his closed eyes. I wiped the salted tears away from them. My vision was beginning to white out now. The lights overhead provided some comfort. 

 

“Armin, please open your eyes.” He opened them hesitantly, still trembling under my hand. 

“They are so beautiful.” He choked onto a sob and brought my forehead up onto his.

“Please Eren, don’t go.” He whispered. I continued to stare into those beautiful oceanic orbs. I pictured a beautiful waterfall seascape. The crashing water flowing down into a cooling stream. A secret haven filled with orchids and butterflies, trees and vines. It was so easy to get lost in those eyes. The muscles in my arm went limp. I felt my hand collapse onto Armins lap. The last thing I saw was that gorgeous mystical blue before it fell into a sea of darkness.

 

\---

 

**Armin: “NO! EREN STAY AWAKE! DON’T LEAVE ME!”**   


_ Isabel: “Armin, there is a way you can save him.” _   
****

**Armin: “No, I’m not doing that, there has to be another way.”**   


_ Isabel: “If you don’t do it now you’ll never get another chance.” _   


Ymir: “What about the cure?”

_ Isabel: “Forget the cure, Armin he’s dying! There’s no time, choose now!” _

**Armin: “I’m sorry Eren… please… I can't let you die...”**


	31. Lament of the Newborn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry about the sudden repost of the last few chapters, I promise it won't happen again. I just forgot to put in "A Crown of Roses" before which explained the whole Eren finding out about Annie situation and an important moment with Isabel. If you haven't read it yet, it may be best to incase you're confused later on. But it may not matter. Anyway Happy New Year, I love you all xxx

A white light. That was the first thing I saw. At first I thought I was dead. Maybe I was. I didn’t know. But strangely, my eyes adjusted to the beam of white. I tried to turn my head to see where I was, but I couldn’t move. I couldn’t wriggle my fingers, I couldn’t even blink. Perhaps I really was dead. 

 

Just as the thought crossed my mind, my head turned to the side, though I did not want it to. I had no control over the movement. It was as if I was dreaming, but through someone else’s mind. But it didn’t feel like a dream. I was reliving a memory. A memory that wasn’t mine. 

 

Everything around me couldn’t help but feel so familiar. It was like my mind was clinging to a desperate wish to remember where I was. The flickering fluorescent light overhead and the various tubes and vials spread along the tables across the entirety of a room. It was not only the scenery though. It was the person that blocked that flickering light. That bright red hair that I knew belonged to a vicious clawed who tried to not only kill me but kill Armin. Petra walked right up to me, placing a hand over my cheek. My mind told me to back away but this body felt at ease with her touch. 

 

Her smile was genuine. She had no ears, no excess fur, no tail. Her hazel eyes held no form of Titan. What was going on? The deja vu became almost too much to comprehend. As my body twisted to get a better look around, it suddenly hit me. The scene of Jean attached to a machine by tubes and needles replayed in my mind. But it wasn’t the scene I was worried about, it was what happened to me in the moment I saw him. When I blacked out.

 

_ A blinding white light struck me like a bolt in the sky. There was an enormous buildup of pressure in each one of my joints. No matter how much I tried there was no way to move them. When I had adjusted to the light, white lab coats, masks and hair nets surrounded my layed down body. Why couldn’t I move my body? Who are these people? Why am I here? My eyes darted around the room looking for answers out of the air. A short woman came walking over to me gently caressing a hand on to my forehead.  _

 

That woman was Petra and I was back in that lab. Why was this going through my head? It didn’t make sense. How could this look and feel so real, yet I couldn’t physically feel anything? 

“How are you feeling sweetie?” A soft voice cooed beside me. The body turned it’s head again, a lock of thin blonde hair falling in front of my vision. Petra pushed it to the side as an exhausted rasp came from my end. 

“I want to go home.” No, I knew that voice better than anyones. How was it possible? Was I- Was I in Armin’s head? Was I looking through his eyes? It seemed unreal, but there was no denying it. I was in Armin’s head. I was reliving his memory.

“I know sweetheart. Don’t worry, as soon as the Doctor says, you can go.” Doctor? This had to be in the past. Was this, when he was turned into a Titan? Petra moved closer, helping Armin to sit upright so that he could have a drink of water. My vision- or really, Armin’s vision, blurred slightly at the sudden rise.

 

“No use in lying to him Petra.” Armin turned his head to see a short man dressed in all black, crossing his arms against the doorway. You didn’t have to hear the stern tone of his voice to know who it belonged to. 

“Levi, please don’t-”

“You may as well tell him the truth.” Why was he here? Like Petra, he too had no Titan features. It was odd actually seeing him in a shirt. Unlike Petra though, he had no lab coat on. Petra took the glass away from Armin’s hand and went to refill it, giving off a loud sigh as she did.

“Kid, it’s unlikely you’re going home. The government probably has you listed as deceased already. You’re stuck here, just like the rest of us.” Armin’s head drooped and his eyes closed. The distant sound of arguing echoed from outside. 

 

Suddenly a huge downpour of men and women in lab coats and hair nets rushed into the room. As Armin’s eyes darted around the room, I could sense everyone’s fear and uncertainty. They were frazzled, loading up syringes and hastily pressing buttons on machines. 

“Doctor! What’s going on?” I heard Petra say out the door. A deep voice sounded though, I couldn’t make out exactly what he was saying. In the corner of my eye, I noticed Rivaille’s eyes widen and his jaw drop. He stared directly towards Armin before I saw a gas mark being forced around Armin’s head.  My vision again went blurry as we were forced back down onto the bed in a desperate attempt to hold us still. We had at least five men in lab coats surrounding us, each on tying a separate limb down onto the bed with leather straps. 

 

Armin screamed out in agony as the straps dug into his flesh. I wanted to close my eyes. I wanted to shut my ears. I didn’t want to see this. I didn’t want to hear this. But I couldn’t get out of this trance. Armin frantically shifted from side to side, repeatedly pleading the scientists to stop as they sunk needles and tubes into various parts of his body. Just as they had done to Jean.

 

Petra stood over us from behind, placing a soothing hand on Armin’s forehead.  

“It’s okay sweetie, you’re going to be fine. You are going to be the start of something wonderful.” She said in a sweet voice. Armin squirmed to get free but my vision was faded and I was starting to really feel the leather straps burning my limbs every time he tried to move them. They held us down to the bed with the force of a truck, there was no way he was getting out of this. Blurs of white and blue rushed around my thin line of vision.

 

The beeping of a heart monitor was the only familiar sound that could be heard through the small room. Any other noises were occupied by the chatter of white coated and masked people above me. They punched records from the different machines that held wires to his body into their tablets.

“His heart rate is beating at a steady pace, loading in the digits for incision thirty-six.” Petra acknowledged to her colleagues. 

“How much pain is he going through Petra? Will this really work?”

“Don’t worry Levi, you’re friends will be fine.” Friends? Was he talking about Isabel and Farlan?

“They are not just my friends Petra, they are my family...”

“Dr. Ral, you heard him, he wants it done now.” A different man interjected as Petra tapped onto a nearby computer. Armin turned his head to see the man with wide eyes and worried sweat dripping down his brow.

 

“No No NO! He’s not ready, we still need to do some adjustments to the serum, if we don’t he may not survive through the experiment. All the animals we’ve tested them on hasn’t even survived the small dosage let alone the full procedure!” Her voice was calm yet still held panic. Armin once again desperately tried to pull the straps off of himself. Though I certainly believed that this was only a memory, the fear of death waned over me. Armin screamed for them to let him go through the gas mask as they got three other men to hold his limbs down.

 

“Heart rate increasing fast!” A man holding us down exclaimed.

“I’m sorry Doctor, but if it doesn’t happen today, we all may not live to be here tomorrow.” Petra nodded and came over to us, a tear threatening to spill over onto my forehead. She ran her hand through Armin’s hair. Lowering her face down next to my ear she whispered, “I’m sorry… Armin. Insert the memory loss serum. Then start Code 078. We don’t want him to remember a thing when the transformation is complete.” 

 

I couldn’t feel the pain. But I sure as hell could see it. And hear it. His back arched and his muscles tensed. He grabbed down on the mattress and tossed and turned with all his might. His knuckles turned white from the force of his grasp in the thin garments. He wailed into the oxygen mask with a strength of a thousand dying soldiers. All I could do was wait. I watched as the thick purple liquid was injected into Armin’s body. The veins in his arms became thick against his skin. I could see his muscles becoming larger and larger with every minute. At the same time I could also sense his pain becoming harsher and harsher. 

 

“I don’t want this.” I only just heard Rivaille say behind us over the commotion. Though I couldn’t directly see what was happening, I did hear a loud grunt and the sound of a body falling to the floor. At first I thought perhaps it was Rivaille trying to stop the experiment. But the procedure kept on going. Armin kept on flailing, kept on taking in the pain.

“Don’t let him fall unconscious or he will die!” Petra screamed. It was absolutely cruel. He had to stay awake through all of this, stay awake through this agonising terror of pain. 

 

\---

 

I had no idea how long I had been watching this for. It felt like hours. I occasionally heard the slight call of a woman calling out percentages. I assumed it was how far along they were at with the ‘transformation’. Armin had stopped screaming at 75%. His body had given up by that point. He still remained conscious though, only breathing through the burning agony of this reality.

 

“We are almost complete Dr. Ral. All we need now is the finalizations.”

“Thank God for that.” Petra exclaimed beside me. Armin’s chest heaved up and down, slowly yet forcefully. I could feel that he was slowly slipping out of consciousness from the sudden ease of the Serum. But instead of my vision going black like I had expected it. It went purple. 

 

A strange purple hue that built a heavy contrast around everything I could see. As Petra pulled a hand over Armin’s head to remove the gas mask, a hand instead grabbed her wrist. This hand was coated in blood, a large gash running all the way around his wrists. With little to no force, she was thrown to the other side of the room. The breath was knocked out of her as the back of her head hit the wall with a splash of red. Within no time at all, Armin had pulled off all of the straps and was crouched on the bed where he was just laying. Though I could see the lips of the trembling scientists moving, I could only hear the sounds of Armin’s breathing, his beating heart and the blood coursing through his veins. The rest was a blur. I could not make out anything. Everything moved too fast. I was only able to make out flashes of writhing bodies and blood stained floors. When he finally stopped, our vision returned to normal, the purple hue vanishing like a blindfold finally being removed. He looked down to his hands and saw that he had claws covered in blood that slowly retracted.

 

He ran as fast as he could toward a mirror. I wish he hadn’t. His now tattered hospital gown was covered in other’s blood. The sight of him first witnessing his titan violet eyes and violet streak through the blonde. The sight of his fangs retracting back to normal. His wrists no longer had that deep gash. In fact his whole body no longer held any cuts or bruises, a light layer of steam evaporating around him instead. It was the same facial expression I imagined on myself when I first saw him.

 

A loud siren and the flashing of red lights made him snap out of it though. I had no idea where he was heading but he was running fast. Too fast. He was finding it difficult to adjust to his new found Titan speed. He kept stopping every few seconds feeling off balance. When he thought that there were pursuers right behind him, they were nowhere to be seen. He finally came to a large metal door labelled exit, but there were chains locking it in place. He didn’t lay a hand on it believing there was no way to open it. He searched around frantically for a way out but it was a dead end. Ahead of him were the pursuers coming to get him, all armed with rifles ready to shoot. 

 

“Please, leave me alone!” He screamed as he pushed his hands in front of himself defensively. This however triggered his elemental abilities, sending out a gust of wind in their direction. They were knocked down with ease. This also however sent Armin flying back through the metal door. He didn’t realise it at first, because it didn’t feel that tough. But as soon as he was outside, he wasted no time to use that new-found speed and power and sprint through the evergreen forest. He didn’t care where he was going, as long as we was away from there. 

 

He stopped at a tall tree and leant up against it, thinking he would have to catch his breath. But he felt no exhaustion. 

“What’s happening to me!?” He shouted out. He clenched his hands to his head and sunk to his knees.

 

\---

 

I sat up as fast I could. My lungs begged for air like a wilted flower seeking moisture. As usual my clothes and my sheets were drenched in my sweat. But this wasn’t from a nightmare this time. I remembered everything. It was too real to be just my imagination. I had to talk to him. I wacked the blankets off of me and started to walk to my closet to get my clothes on. It felt like I had only taken one step and I was already at the closet. Which was strange seeing as it’s all the way on the other side. I shook it off and proceeded to take my black attire off of the coat hanger. I walked back to my bed, and the same thing again, only this time I fell. 

 

I was so off balance. Wait. What happened before I had that memory? The last thing I remembered before that was having that fight with Annie. Then Armin came and tried to save me. But- but I died didn’t I. Unless…

 

I unintentionally sped toward the mirror to see if my predictions were true. It was. My muscles were at least twice as big as the were before, my body a whole lot more toned than before. My knees that were so jacked before now felt brand new, and felt like it too. But that wasn’t the strange thing. I came closer to the mirror and placed a hand to my eye. They were once green. At least they both were. But now, my left eye was brown. Almost a gold, with a hint of violet speckled throughout it. Did Armin really do it?

 

“EREN!” I turned towards the door, thinking there would be someone right there. The voice sounded so close. But there was no one there. I quickly threw on my clothes, and sprinted to my door. I looked down the hall to see the very blonde I wanted to talk to. I called out his name and began to run towards him. Instead he ran towards me, burying his face in my chest. His arms wrapped around my body tightly. I lifted my arms in shock. He was mumbling something into my chest but I couldn’t understand over the muffled sobs. I pulled him away gently, asking him what was wrong. He stared up at me with tear-filled eyes. He raised a hand to my newly-coloured eye, stroking his thumb under it gently as he choked in a breath. 

 

“It worked. You’re okay.” He whispered. He slammed himself against my body, scrunching my shirt in his hands on my chest. I bit my lip to hold back the tears that were about to fall from my eyes. I wrapped my arms around him, caressing the strands of blonde hair through my fingers as I kissed his forehead. That’s when I lost it as well. We both sunk to the floor in our embrace. 

“So are you...” I didn’t realise how hard that memory had hit me until I saw him alive and well in front of me. We continued to pull each other closer and closer to each other as we cried into each other’s shoulders. I never wanted to let him go.

 

\---

 

**Rivaille: “Is he awake?”**

_ Jean: “Yes Sir, he woke up a few minutes ago. Armin just went to go see him.” _

**Rivaille: “Good, we are definitely going to need him.”**

_ Jean: “You mean, for Hanji? I thought we weren’t able to find a cure if he was-” _ _   
_ ****

**Rivaille: “Not to find a cure you idiot! There was a reason he survived taking Armin's blood when most wouldn't, and I'm going to find out why.”**

_Jean: "Why are you so interested in those two? I thought you despised Eren? I thought-"_

**Rivaille: "That is not open for discussion Kirschtein... you're dismissed..."**


	32. The Monstrous Insanity of Love

"Armin! Wait, there has to be a logical explanation for this!" There was no stopping him now. I didn't think telling him would trigger this sort of reaction. If I did I probably would of waited for Jean or Marco to show up to calm him down. I told Armin everything I saw. From Petra being the one to try and stop the transformation, to Rivaille being present during that time. He was so confused at first, to be honest so was I. But although he didn't remember being turned or fighting the scientists in the lab, he remembered their mangled bodies and the blood under his claws. When I finally got to the part about him looking in the mirror and running away, he knew that it must of been true. That what I saw was real.

How it was possible, we didn't know. But that wasn't what was going through his mind. He was pissed as anything and you didn't need to look at his face to conclude that fact. His grip around my wrist tightened with every loud stomp he made as he dragged me toward the dark-winged titan. I didn't know what he was going to do. The positive side of me thought that perhaps he was just going to talk to Rivaille about what I saw, that it would all work out smoothly. Unfortunately, it was the realistic side that won.

Armin tapped Rivaille on the shoulder for him to turn around. I don't even think Rivaille had a chance to register who it was before he was flying out the window and out of sight. Armin's strike was so strong and so fast, that I actually saw his hook make contact. My mouth dropped as the shattered glass sprayed across the floors and the subtle amazed chatter started to commence behind me. Armin held no hesitation as he jumped out the window after him. In the corner of my eyes Isabel and Farlan ran up to me, the same confused-astonished expressions covering their faces as mine. I shook my head and followed their lead, leaping out of the window after them.

Normally, jumping from this height, my limbs would of been sprawled along the whole expanse of this conveniently built lookout deck under the smashed window. But somehow, I stayed in tact, landing straight on my feet as I made impact. Perhaps I could get used to this whole Titan thing.

"YOU WERE THERE WEREN'T YOU!" Armin screamed at Rivaille as he held him by his neck in the air. For whatever reason, I didn't see Rivaille resist as much as he should of. Normally, he would either punch Armin square in the stomach or just glide out of the hold. But he stayed there, letting Armin control him.

"ANSWER ME!" He yelled in more desperation. Rivaille's head drooped as he placed a hand on top of Armin's and slowly made him release his hold. Armin didn't resist and let Rivaille gently release himself. But Rivaille was apparently a really good actor and only used the opportunity to strike at Armin while he was off guard. This made this quarrel grow into something more than just an accusation. I was honestly so sick of seeing my friends get hurt. I didn't care what either of their reasons were, there was no point in creating more injuries for themselves.

It took less than a second for me to speed over to them and push them away from each other. Rivaille was surprised by the new strength and speed, as was our bystanders. But he didn't give up. Both Armin and Rivaille charged head on toward each other, weapons tight in their grasp.

"Just stop!" I screamed out, pushing both my hands either side of me for them to come to their senses. Though my eyes were closed I could feel a slight breeze coming from my hands, as well as the silencing of the chatter around us. I looked towards where my hands were and saw that I had conjured a gust of wind that pushed both of them to the ground. Only this air seemed different to the conjurings I had seen Armin do. This wind had a tinge of blue and black, with almost a pixel-like texture in it. I closed my palms and pulled my hands into my chest to stop the flow.

"So it did work." Rivaille said as he used his scythe to help him back to a stand. I ran over to Armin to help him up to his feet also, finding myself uncontrollably speeding again.

"What the hell were you thinking?" I whispered into Armin's ear as I brushed off some of the straggling leaves on his shirt.

"I wasn't- I'm sorry-"  
"You should be." We both looked towards Rivaille who quickly put his scythe away in his BA.

"Yes, Armin. I was there. That doesn't make me responsible."

 

\---

 

We all headed back into Utgard. There were definitely some questions both me and Armin had for Rivaille, and it seemed everyone else felt that same curiosity as well. Everyone from the Survey Corps squads was sitting in the meeting room with us. Everyone that was, except for Annie. Her titan bound partner Hitch had been having a really rough time handling all of this. Annie was still her friend and couldn't imagine why she would do something like this. I was thankful that she too had friends in the room that could make her feel more at ease. I couldn't help but feel that most of the eyes in the room were fixated on me, more precisely, the new edition to my facial features. Those friendly faces were the only thing that alleviated some form of anxiety, the only ones who didn't stare.

Isabel, Farlan and even Kui were sat up the front with Rivaille. Though he was only really directing his conversation at Armin and I, he probably felt it important that the others heard it as well.

"You knew who we were before. Before we became Titans. Criminals who worked in the Underground districts of Shingeki. Well, one day, a woman who we had been having dealing with for quite sometime came to warn us that the authorities had found us. She gave us a way out. She knew everything that was going to happen. When the cops would arrive, how many there would be, even where they were at that moment. She offered us an escape. We would fake our deaths and then go with her to this lab. In exchange for her help, we would have to participate in an experiment. I'm guessing you know what she meant." Armin and I nodded. The tension didn't seem as thick in the room as I expected it to be. I only hoped it was natural and not Marco sitting next to me controlling that vibe.

"They didn't tell me what sort of experiment it was. I assumed it was for a hair product or something. When I saw how much... how much pain you were in Armin- I-" Isabel and Farlan put a hand on Rivaille's shoulder simultaneously.

"It's not your fault big bro." Isabel gently said. I felt Armin go tense next to me. I stared down at his fists and saw his nails digging into his skin. I placed a hand on his leg, making him jump and look at me. My hopeful smile eased his stress. He took a deep breath in and let it out quickly.

"Why didn't you say anything before?" Armin asked. Rivaille bowed his head and looked away. Instead, Isabel jumped off of the desk.

"We had our memories erased too. We don't remember the name, the face or anything about the doctor. We only recall waking up like this after being taken to the lab by Petra." Isabel explained.

"PETRA!?" Armin and I exclaimed at the same time. She was the one that they had dealings with? Her motives were only becoming more and more confusing with every passing minute.

"Yes, Petra. Head of the Titan Commandment, Dr. Petra Ral. But that's not important right now." Farlan chimed in. "What's important right now is how you came to look at Armin's past in your mind and how you miraculously survived taking Armin's blood." He said pointing directly at me. I suddenly felt very self-conscious again. Was that how he turned me? I actually drank Armin's blood?

"Drinking my blood can turn you into a Titan if you have the gene. That's what Hanji said-"  
"But it still had a twenty percent chance of survival. Your very lucky, Eren." Hanji interrupted. Armin stared daggers at Hanji.

"Why are you only telling me this now!"

"Because there was still a chance and we had to take it." Armin went to protest but Hanji was too adamant on speaking herself.

"Eren, you were able to fall naturally into your titan abilities weren't you?" She asked casually. I stuttered an unsure yes as I was still a little rusty on the abilities but I still had some understanding. Granted I had no idea how I did most of it, but it was a start.

"Just as I thought, I believe because your body already held the gene, it had already adjusted to the immense power it holds. Where we were once human, I think this proves that you have always been a titan, allowing you to control your shifts and use your abilities naturally. Though because it somehow went dormant, it may take some time to choose when to shift and when to turn back. But I don't think you will ever lose control." I felt relief flood the entire room. For most, it was the fact that their questions had been answered. For Armin and I, it was the fact I wouldn't lose control. I could finally help them. I could fulfill my promise and help Armin find a cure.

Two clicks echoed in my ears and I snapped around to see Rivaille looking incredibly bored with his hands crossed over his chest.

"Now that that's all clear, the reason I've called you here is because we have located Annie." I felt my heart start to pound, the adrenalin running through my veins. "We will be leaving at 0800 sharp. Don't even think about being tardy. Oh and Ymir?" The brunette looked up at the Winged titan. "You will be staying here with me helping to coach the newborn."

"WHAT!?" Ymir screamed. She sped over to Rivaille, ranting on about how she couldn't leave Krista to go on this trip without her. As Rivaille ignored her, I came to realise what he meant by newborn.

Everyone left the room to prepare for tomorrow, leaving Ymir yelling at Rivaille while Krista tried to pull her back. Armin turned to leave but stopped when he realised I wasn't following. I walked up to Rivaille as he seemed to be ignoring Ymir anyway. Tapping him on the shoulder slightly, I swallowed my courage and asked.

"I would like to know too. What do you mean staying here? I'm not going with you guys?" Rivaille lifted an eyebrow then did something I had never seen him do before. He laughed. It was only subtle but it was still a laugh. Ymir stopped her one-sided argument as well to witness this strange event.

"You have been a Titan for two seconds. I doubt you would last even that long out there."

"Uh, technically it's almost seventeen years and you've seen me fight. I can learn on the way. Plus don't you think Ymir should stay with Krista anyway."

"THANKYOU!" Krista rolled her eyes and face palmed herself, shaking her head at her girlfriend. Rivaille didn't seem anymore amused.

"Don't get funny with me brat, look." Rivaille came very close to me. As short as he was, I couldn't help but feel overwhelmingly intimidated by his close proximity and the aggressive whisper her spat out in my ear.

"I am in charge of keeping this squad safe. You being there without any experience would only slow them down and potentially lead to your death. You are staying here and Ymir is going to train you. Krista will fill in your spot in Squad II, we'll find a replacement for Annie later. End of discussion." Rivaille turned back towards his desk and nodded to Farlan.

"But sir-"

"Eren." Armin called out from the door. "He's right, once you've got better control of your abilities you can-" I didn't wait for him to finish. I pushed past Armin and sped off into my room. Papers flew off of my desk once I practically collapsed onto my bed. I had been frustrated with my lack of power before, but never like this. I didn't know what I preferred. Not being able to fight at all or having the means to do so but not be given the opportunity.

If he wanted me to practice, then fine I would practice. Turning the lights off and crawling on top of my mattress, I proceeded to attempt to conjure up a ball of fire. It didn't have to be big. Just a simple little flame would do. Even it was just the size of my nail, if I could conjure air, I could do fire right? I struck out my hands in an aggressive form like I saw people do in movies and anime. I tried clicking my fingers, imagining the little ball of light appearing in front of my eyes. I tried to picture the heat, the scent, the flicker, even the taste, every aspect of the element I could think of, to make it appear in my hands. Nothing was working.

My mind was all over the place. Jumping from thought to thought. I just couldn't focus on the task at hand. So I stopped. I closed my eyes and allowed my mind to relax. I forgot about my frustration. I forgot about my exhaustion and I allowed myself to only think about the flame. I channeled all of my energy into my hands. Once again I pictured the little ball of flame, willing it to grow in my hands.

Suddenly I felt a slight tickle on my palm and opened my eyes to see that little ball of flame flickering in my palm. I couldn't help but smile at it. It was so small yet so vibrant, it wasn't like real fire like the ones that occur naturally. This little flame held a tinge of violet, making it look like it could burn bright even in the darkest caves. Then the flickering became more aggressive. Though it still stayed the same size, it flew past my ear behind me and made it's way to my door, where a certain blonde was standing with his hand held out.

"It's a reflection. Using elemental manipulation I mean." The little flame fell into his palm as he trapped it into a fist. My confidence fell immediately as I realised I wasn't the one to create that little flame of beauty. Armin's shoulder brushed up against mine as he sat closely next to me. He grabbed my hand and positioned it upward like I was trying to catch water with one hand but with my fingers spread.

"I did a lot of self-experimentation and research as I learned. Picturing and willing it to come is not enough. They are all very emotion based. What you're trying to do comes from strong physical emotions such as anger or lust. Emotions that can generate from heightened senses. While you're frazzled and frustrated like this, you won't be able to focus." He was still grasping my hand as he talked, racing the lines of my palm as he spoke.

"Earth comes emotions that stabilize you, like determination. Water, from emotions that cleanse such as sadness or mourning and air from peaceful emotions such as serenity or joy or-" Armin was cut off by a small breeze started to rise from my palm, it again had that odd pixel-like texture but it was a lot more sweet than the one before.

"Such as wanting to help a friend?" I closed my palm and looked directly into Armin's eyes. He gazed up at me too but then tore his hands away from mine. I felt my hands go cold and the whirl of air slowly fade as his touch left me.

"I can fight Armin-"

"No. You'll be fine here. It's not like I'm going alone, plus Marco is staying as well. Rivaille and Ymir can both-"

"No! I don't want to lose you again." The stern expression that covered Armin's face was not what I had in mind. He stood up quickly in front of me with his arms crossed over his chest. I was too afraid to look up at him.

"You were not the only one who lost someone that day Eren." I knew this. Why'd he have to bring up that day again? He told me before, but that didn't mean it was okay if I risked losing him again.

"I honestly thought you had drowned in that river. They broke your knees. You couldn't walk. When I finally found out you were alive I- I had to see you again. When I finally came back to Trost, I found you almost straight away, only..." His aggressiveness slowly left. He knelt down and slouched his shoulders. His hand grabbed mine as the other caressed the hem of my shirt sleeve. He slipped the sleeve up to my shoulder, revealing the scars of my pain in losing him. How could he have known? I had never shown him?

I forced my arm away and pulled down my sleeves. Nothing could describe the dread that had dropped to the pit of my stomach. Tears threatened to spill at the corners of my eyes but I forced them to stay. I gripped my sleeves with my fingers tighter as I took a shaky breath in. I dared to open my eyes, only to see that Armin hadn't bothered holding his own tears back. He was holding his own, controlling the flow, unlike me who was shaking from the realisation that he had known about my weakness.

"How did you know?" I barely asked through my lack of breath.

"Trost Tower." _No._ "That's where I saw you." _Oh God please no._ "I called out to you but you didn't realise. You thought it was your mind playing tricks on you, but I was there. I ran up as fast as I could and I pulled you down."

"No. Co- Connie pulled me down."

"Connie was never there. I grabbed. I held you. I didn't dare let go." His voice started to drown out into a sob. He swallowed and regained his breath so. "After that night, I injected you with a serum I created that can alter your memory. I couldn't let you know I was alive. There were still people after you, and having me on your tail would of only increased the risk of you being captured. When I talked to Connie, he was completely understanding and he agreed to play along." Connie knew as well? I would of asked about it, but words failed to escape me. It all made sense. How he trusted Armin to no end when we first saw him. The obsession with the Shadowstrike. How he was so persistent in finding out more about him. He really was smart in his own way. He put up a good act in pretending he didn't know.

"When I was sure that you were home and safe, I continued to search everywhere for the key to a cure. Anywhere I could think of, universities, hospitals, science labs, I couldn't find anything. But that was all I wanted, I wanted to be normal." He wiped away his tears and dried them on his shirt. I had to brighten the mood. He was trailing down a dark path of his mind and I didn't want to see him stuck there.

"Armin? What's so wrong about being a titan? We can stay here. There are people here that care about you. I'll get stronger and then we can really be those ninja assassins we used to talk about as kids-"  
"I DON'T WANT TO BE A HERO!" He shouted. Stunned, I remained silent. He swallowed in his breath and gazed down to his feet.

"I'm sick of living in fear." He whispered. I pushed myself off the bed and grabbed his arms.

"Fear of what?" His breath became shaky, his already tear-stained cheeks losing colour with every trembling exhale.

"That my next breath will be my last. That... That one day... I won't be able to turn back from the full shift... That..." He grabbed my wrist and pulled it to his lips. My scars tingled where his mouth lightly touched.

"That this conversation could be our last..." His grip left my arm and travelled to my cheek. He brushed his thumb under my new golden eye as he bit his lips.

"I've dedicated... my life... to protecting you. I don't... I don't want to keep living everyday, knowing there are people out there who want you dead or wish you were." I had no words. Movement surpassed me. I could only think about his gentle touch. I never wanted him to let go.

"My heart has been covered in icicles for as long as I can remember. No one could come close to it. If they did, they either left or got hurt. But- But somehow, you thawed my heart. You made those spikes melt away. You opened me up to a world I could never have found by myself. When my parents even left you stayed by my side. And all I did was repay you by pushing you to your limits. If I had of come back sooner, you wouldn't of tried to die. If I had been there for you when Annie attacked you, you wouldn't of become this. You didn't deserve any of this. You DON'T deserve any of this. I will not stop until I get you home. Until you are safe." He barely uttered the last part of his speech.

"Armin... Why do you care so much?" His eyes caught mine. Those mesmerizing sapphire eyes that twinkled and glistened in any light. Those eyes that could brighten up my world in an instant. His palm slowly moved past my cheek to the back of my neck. I didn't resist his pull as he moved my head closer to his. His upper lip brushed mine slightly, catching his warm breath. My heart was beating like nothing before. It felt like time itself had stopped. He hesitated for only a moment, before gently pressing his lips onto mine. My eyes shut as I melted into him. Nothing else mattered except the softness of his lips against mine. I never realised how much I've yearned for this. How much I needed this. The kiss stayed soft, stayed gentle. Though I could feel the toll of everything we had been through starting to make it build. I didn't want to jinx it as soon as I had it so regrettably I pulled away as gently as I was pulled in.

I instantly missed his touch. I instantly wanted him back. _No, you have to take it easy. You don't want to scare him away_. I locked my eyes to his but I kept finding myself glancing down at his already swollen lips. And if I was judging correctly, he was doing the same to me.

"Fuck it." I find myself saying, before we slam our lips together once more. This time it's with a lot more passion and a lot more aggression. Though he was smaller, I found it hard to battle for dominance as his tongue brushed slightly over my bottom lip. He gave out a slight moan as I let him enter. Both his hands became tangled in my hair as I caressed my hands around his waist and pulled him closer. I couldn't get enough of his taste. The anger, the sadness, the frustration, the confusion, everything was let out in this one passionate kiss.

I found myself pressing myself closer to Armin and before I knew it, he was against the wall, his hair now being tugged through my hands. He moaned again into the kiss as I tilted my head to get better access. His hands came around my shoulders as his tongue trailed along my lip. I felt a small nip from him causing me to moan into the kiss. Eventually though, our lungs had reached it's limit and we had to pull away. I rested my forehead on his as I broke off. We both panted heavily as we rested in each other's holds.

"Now I definitely can't let you go tomorrow." I chuckled. Armin too giggled, biting his lip in that way that I knew was never intended to be arousing, but always was. Armin's hands travelled up my arm and back down again. He smiled as he gave me another quick peck on the lips.

"I'll see you in the morning okay. Come early." I nodded as he walked towards my door slowly, hiding his adorable smile behind his hand as he bit his finger.

"Hey wait," He grabbed the door frame and turned back to me.

"Don't ever think it was your fault for what I did. Those were my battles, not yours." He paused for a moment before whispering a short 'okay' and walking off down the hall. As soon as I was sure I was gone, I found myself collapsing onto the bed, grinning like a complete idiot. I positioned my hand above me just like Armin had said and imagined my emotions being conjured into that little ball of energy. Instantly a bright flame in that blue-black pixel texture appeared in my palm. I sat up straight away, admiring the way it flickered yet didn't burn in the way normal fire would. I peered back towards the door. 

_Very emotion based, huh?_

 

_\---_

 

_Jean: "So the almighty Armin Arlert is no longer a kissing virgin."_

**Armin: "Oh my god, how long have you been in my head?"**

_Jean: "Long enough."_

**Armin: "How many time have I said that you can't jus-"**

_Jean: "Well it's kind of hard when all I can hear is 'Eren, Oh Eren' swimming through my mind."_

**Armin: "Okay, that was not what was going through my mind."**

_Jean: "Wanna a bet? Speaking of bets, Marco owes me ten bucks."_

**Armin: "Speaking of Marco, you don't see me and Eren taking bets for what you guys do when you sneak off, if you know what I mean."**

_Jean: "How'd you know about that?"_

**Armin: "I didn't."**

_Jean: "You sly little..."_

 

 


	33. Don't Let Go of Me

Kui's deep bark echoed throughout the room, acting as an excited alarm clock for my early morning drowsiness. I knew it was Kui, as she had practically been at my door every morning since I arrived here nearly a month ago. I had come to know everyone so well. Learn their interests, learn their talents. But the memories of last night made me jump out of my reminiscing. Remembering Armin's soft lips on mine, the way he felt in my arms. I couldn't help but smile at the thought.

I raised a fist to my smile in an over exaggerated yawn and kicked the sheets off my bed. Walking over to my mirror above the sink, I became shocked at something I hadn't remembered. The one thing that proved I was no longer human, but Titan. I wondered how long it would take for me to get used to that one golden brown eye on the left. Juxtaposed to my vibrant green, it looked as though it was showing how I changed from before and after leaving home.

A soft nose nudged me gently on my leg, pulling me out of my trance. I really did miss them. My friends. My mother. What were they thinking right now? Was I convicted criminal over there? Did they think I had been taken? Or even killed? The thought made me sick to my stomach. But that was one thing I always loved about dogs and canines alike. They always knew when you were upset and would come to comfort you. Perhaps that was how Kui came to be in my room every morning, from the nightmares I would have. She continued to rub her face along my leg affectionately, obviously sensing I was still somewhat upset from before.

I bent down and ruffled her thick grey fur, making sure to scratch under her chin just the way she liked. For a ferocious grey wolf like herself, one of which I've seen tear through her enemies like they were a ragdoll, she really was just a big puppy once you got to know her. I laughed as she trotted away from me to the door, barking again as she ran around in a circle. I stared at her in confusion. She seemed as though she wanted me to come with her. I nearly tripped over my own feet at the realisation. Armin was leaving today.

I pulled on my gear as fast as I could, Kui waiting patiently at the door wagging her tail. Though she stayed put, I could feel her eyes roll at how long I was taking. I snatched my BA from my desk and followed her to the runway where everyone was waiting. Everyone, except Armin. I saw Jean conversing with Marco as well as Ymir, Krista, Rivaille, Farlan, Isabel and the rest of the Elite Survey Corps there. I was about to ask Isabel where he was when I felt a hand tap my shoulder. I turned to see those beautiful blue eyes staring back at me.

"Didn't I say to come early?" He stated, more than questioned with a sly smirk spread across his face.

"Yea, I ummm..." I looked down at Kui for an out as I scratched the back of my head nervously, but she had already gone back to Isabel's side, obviously to say their goodbyes. It was sad she couldn't go with her, but Kui was definitely safer here.

"Oi! Armin! You make sure you take care of my Krista you hear? If anything happens to my girl, you're the one I'm comin' for!" Ymir shouted over all of the idle chatter as she held the winged blonde in her arms.

Armin laughed as he retorted, "Sure, as long as you take care of mine." Wait. What?

"Armin, Did you just call me your girl?" He completely lost it as he nodded at my question.

"You're mine either way." The biggest grin covered my face and I couldn't stop it. I started to laugh too. I felt like the luckiest person alive. But then reality kicked in. And it kicked in hard.

"Umm, about being late-"

"It's fine Eren, You had a big day yesterday. We've still got ten minutes or so before we have to head-off anyway."

He definitely looked like he was leaving. He was dressed in the same black tight clothing as I first found him in as the Shadowstrike, only this time he also had a set of blue-black cyber-like goggles on his forehead which I assumed was an invention of Hanji's. His hair was tied back in it's small ponytail, loose strands of magenta and blonde falling past his ears, tucked behind the goggles' straps. He also possessed the two weapons that I only ever saw him use once. The one thing besides his knife that wasn't from his BA. His dual-wield pistols. The ones I used to aid in our escape from the plaza. The ones he used to save Mikasa and finish off Reiner's henchmen. I couldn't help but let curiosity take over me.

"Armin? Why do you never use those guns at the back?" He peered over his shoulder and took one in each hand. He swirled them on his index fingers into a better grip, then stared at them.

"I never really liked guns. I find them cowardly." He stated as he reloaded the magazines in each one with neon-blue bullets from his belt pouch. I suspected they were also Hanji's creation, bullets made with Titan poison.

"What makes you say that?"

"Put it this way," He placed his weapons back in their desired holsters at his lower back. "God didn't make man equal... Colt did." My face must of conveyed my confusion, as he rolled his eyes and sighed.

" _Samuel Colt?_ They were one of the original manufacturers of firearms. Look if you wanted to rob somewhere with a gun but knew that everyone around you had a gun as well, would you really risk doing it? Knowing full well that those people around you could shoot at any moment if you made the wrong move?" I straightaway went to answer no, but stopped myself when I realised what he meant.

"Equality brings anarchy. That's why communism never worked. That's why there will always be a lower and higher class. It's impossible to truly live in an equal world as humans instinctively always want to be better off than they already are." I couldn't help but giggle at his theory. Not because I didn't believe it, it actually seemed very plausible, but because it was him saying it. I never expected such political thoughts to come from someone like Armin. Placing a hand on his shoulder, I moved closer to him and tilted his chin up towards me.

"You say that like you're not human." He took his bright eyes away from mine and to the ground.

"Not anymore at least..."

"That doesn't make it a bad thing." His eyes came back to mine and he smiled. He then jumped up in shock as if he remembered something. He backed away from my hold and pulled out something from his pocket.

"I need to give you something." He held the object in his closed palm and brought it in front of his chest. As he opened his palm, my heart skipped a beat. In his hand was the stone wings. The talisman that Armin had given me. The one I threw away in the river.

"I found it on the bank of the river when I came to look for you after you saw Annie and I." His fingers traced the outer feathers of the necklace as he walked closer to me.

"I'm not sure how well it will work now that you're a Titan but I still want you to-" I grasped his fingers and closed them over the talisman, cupping the back of his palm with my other hand. He looked up at me with a bewildered look.

"You said it yourself, it won't work on me, because I won't be in danger." Before he could protest that that wasn't what he meant, I opened his palm gently, I took the necklace and placed it over his neck. As if on cue, it began to glow in the way it did when I was in danger. He looked down at the light and held it in the palm of his hands, the highlights reflecting in his iris.

"This way, I will know when you will be in danger, and I will come and save you" Tugging on both of his hands, I hoisted them over my neck. I was a bit nervous to do this as I didn't know whether he wanted to show what we had in public. I know he had just stated that I was his 'girl' in front of everyone, but that didn't make me any less anxious. When his hands finally clasped together around my neck and the pink in his cheeks began to grow, I took it as I sign that it was okay, wrapping my arms around his waist. I made sure not to touch the guns at his back.

"You know that's not how this thing works Eren." I shrugged.

"Where it anyway. It-" I choked on my words. The feeling of losing him again starting to creep itself out of my subconscious and into my thoughts.

"It will... It will help me cope... with... this..." He nodded and pulled me into a hug, with his hand on the back of my head. I brought my hands up around his shoulders burying myself in his neck. I wanted to stay like this forever. I didn't want him to go. I had a bad feeling about all of this. What if Annie was waiting for them? What if they get lost? What if they come back with casualties for nothing? I didn't want to lose him again. I knew I said it over and over. That I didn't want him to go. But I said it again anyway. Tears threatened to spill, but I let hope keep them back. The thought that he could find the identity of this Doctor, the thought that we could finish this once and for all, was the only thing keeping me sane.

"Alright guys, let's make haste!" I heard Farlan yell from behind me. As I broke away from our embrace the loud swoosh of the winged titan's take off and the soft patter of the clawed and deviants run on the concrete filled the air. It certainly felt like they were heading into a battle. I caught Jean giving one last good bye kiss to Marco with their hands intertwined. As he forced himself away he let their grasp in each other's hand linger, until Jean was no longer in arm reach and Marco was left with his hand suspended in the air towards is love. I looked back to Armin to see he was looking at the same thing.

"I have to go." He said solemnly, as he started to walk past me with the crowd. My shoulders dropped. I bit my lip to stop the tears that I could feel were on the brink of falling. I caught Armin's hand before he could get away and pulled him into me. I slammed my lips as hard as I could onto his. His tension eased almost instantly as our mouths made contact. I wrapped my hands around his shoulders and pulled him in closer, wanting nothing more than to keep him in my hold for all of eternity. I made sure I remembered everything about him. His taste, his touch, his lips, his kiss. I wanted this moment to be as memorable as possible. I knew he would come back. But there was always that sorrowful doubt that hung in my mind like the icicles that I broke off of Armin's heart.

We pulled away simultaneously from our passionate gentle kiss. I caressed the back of his head, twirling his blonde hair in my fingers whilst I stared into his eyes for what I hoped would not be the last.

"Armin we have to go!" Jean yelled from just off the runway. I took his hand in both of mine and pulled it close to my chest.

"Promise me you'll come back this time... Please." With another soft kiss on my lips, he whispered _I promise_ into my ear. I kissed the back of his hand as he walked backwards toward Jean and the others, never taking his eyes off of mine. He hesitated for only a moment before turning around, running towards the others. Never looking back.

I stood there for a few more seconds, before speeding towards the edge of the runway, watching the group of Titans disappear into the forest. His blonde hair and dark hood eventually vanished from my sight. My throat collapsed just as his image did. I stayed in that one spot, staring at where the group had left for what seemed like hours, but was probably only minutes. A hand on my shoulder finally made me turn around. Marco put an arm around me and started to lead me back into Utgard. What I saw only broke my heart more. I hadn't realised that not only did I tune out reality, but also all of the noise around me. Because what I saw was Kui sitting at the edge of the runway as well, and what I heard, was the sound of a pained howl of a pup who had just lost their mother.

 

\---

 

It's amazing how fast time can fly when you are concentrating on one particular thing. Unfortunately, my mind kept wandering. As the training arena was pretty much abandoned from the lack of titans actually here to train, I thought maybe it would be a good opportunity to work on my elemental binding. It was odd being in the massive complex with only twenty or so other people in the whole building, one of them sitting in front of me attempting to also pass time.

Marco observed with a close eye as I experimented with different feelings to see what I could create out of them. I found, looking back at different memories had a tendency to strengthen whatever it was I came up with. At one stage, I thought back to the day I woke up in the hospital, the police confirming that Armin had been kidnapped and could not locate his whereabouts. That moment had ingrained itself into my brain so much that I could almost relive it if I were to close my eyes.

With that feeling of mourning in the back of my mind, I willed myself to conjure water vapour into a liquid form in my palms. After a few tries, I was able to create a rippling sphere of water about the size of a basketball in front of me. Like everything else I had conjured, it had that unique blue and black pixel texture to it. I didn't understand why it was different from everyone else's that seemed to encompass whatever 'species' of Titan they were. I just brushed it off. It was probably something to do with the fact the gene had laid dormant for however long and I didn't dare try and get into the science of that.

As Kui continued to jump up and bite the little pixel bubbles I made, Ymir suddenly appeared from the entrance of the Arena. Marco and I simultaneously got up on our feet and made our way over to her, meeting her halfway. I knew she had to be feeling the same separation anxiety as the three of us were. Everyone knew how protective she was of Krista. I never saw them separated. It was easy to tell, just by the look on her face that she was already extremely worried about her. I could see Marco was about to use his Titan ability to cheer her up, but I nudged his arm, gesturing him not to. Everyone needed to cope with this on their own, with no unnatural forces altering it.

"It's time to start your training Jaeger." Ymir stated coldly. She didn't wait for a reply, only turned on her heels quickly, walking back the way she came. I looked to Marco for some sort of assurance as to what she meant for me to do. He replied with a shrug. Gesturing the same, I decided I would just follow her. She stopped at the staircase to the upper level, tilting her head upwards with her arms crossed. I followed her gesture and walked up the stairs.

As I made my way up, I began to hear a loud argument going on between Rivaille and a few others that I couldn't recognise the voices of. When I emerged onto the upper floor, I saw that it wasn't him having an argument, but rather him giving orders in a frazzled state.

"I don't care how many men you need, if we don't have a guard up at each post 24/7 we are in more danger of getting ambushed. Our number one priority is defense. Spot the enemy before they spot us. Got it!" The three titans nodded with a fist to their heart as they ran off past me down the stairs. Rivaille massaged the bridge of his nose with his index finger and thumb in frustration. I could tell the thought of our best soldiers leaving Utgard unprotected was stressing him out.

"Rivaille, I brought him." I heard Ymir call from behind me. The dark winged man shot his eyes in our direction and nodded. As he straightened himself up, he led us over to the door that I remembered Isabel telling me was restricted to Elite Survey Corps members only. My eyes widened as he rested his palm over the handle with his keycard over the verification box. This was going to be my training? It was both nerve-wracking yet exciting all at the same time. Before he opened the door, he turned to me with a frown on his face.

"I wouldn't normally put people through this, this early in training. But we are quite vulnerable and need your skills ASAP. Bottom line don't fuck up." I replied with an assuring sound and a nod as Rivaille opened the door. This was it. This was what I had been waiting for. Although I may still be labelled a Vulgaris on my key card, and I still can't get total control over my Titan abilities, there was no doubt about it. They accepted me as one of their own. I was going to become stronger.

_We will finally be able to go home Armin. I won't break my promise._

 

\---

 

_Annie: "I did what you asked! I made Utgard vulnerable. Armin was locked up, Eren was broken! It's not my fault!"_

**Petra: "I told you to _immobilize_ them. That means kill them. Your feeling for that Shadowstrike was your downfall, you failed. And the Doctor doesn't like failure** s."

_Annie: "Please, I just want to see him again."_

**Petra: "Did you really think, I was going to allow you to see you precious dad if you joined us? You are really are just a naive child. Throw her in with the other two, she's of no use to us now.** "

_Annie: "LET ME GO! I DID EVERYTHING I COULD!"_

**Petra: "Not my fault you're a tasteless whore. Say hi to your dad on the other side for me would ya."**

_Annie: "YOU FUCKING MONSTER!"_


	34. Back to Your Roots

"JAEGER! FOR GODSAKE BEHIND YOU!" Rivaille's voice echoed over the PA system.

"I know! I know!" I exclaimed back to him as I brought my leg up to strike a devastating back kick into the sternum of the virtual Titan behind me. As I did this, I lifted the earth underneath him with my elemental powers, making him off balance. I knew it was only a hologram, but I couldn't help but feel satisfaction when his temple made contact with the ground, sending him away in a cloud of pixelated dust. That, and the fact that I was getting a lot better control with my element binding was also giving shivers of joy.

"You're the one that put this on the goddamn highest level!" I shouted, hoping that Rivaille would hear me. It was needless to say that this simulator was brutal. Whatever Armin and Hanji were thinking when creating this thing, must of been quite horrific. On the same note though, they were nothing short of absolute geniuses.

The one thing that set this system apart from anything I had seen before, was how realistic it was. Every sense was taken to account. The cool breeze against my hair, the evergreen scent of the oakwood trees even the rustling bushes from critters roaming. It wasn't only the environment that was lifelike either. The enemies as well. Although each one looked the same, the pain that they inflicted had very different effects. It was a strange feeling being hit by the virtual enemies. You would feel the same measure of pain as you would if you were hit the same in the real world, but there would be no scar, and you would never die. If you weren't careful, you could drive yourself insane in these walls.

Lucky me, as Rivaille was desperate to get my abilities up to his standards, I was gifted with starting off at level twelve in a thick rainforest environment. Great. It felt as if I had walked into the Amazon, the exotic calls of birds the ever so thick sweat that started to build under my arms and on my brow only moments after the settings were finalized. It was quite a sight. Until I had to start the blood shed. I had just about finished off the last enemy before everything around me turned back to white.

I collapsed to the ground on my hands knees, my sword clunking to the ground as I fell. I could feel the perspiration dripping down my jawline and onto the ground with every hefty breath I took in. This was definitely the hardest training I had ever endured.

"How's your blade?" A shadow passed overhead, blocking the white fluorescent light above. I peered up slowly to see Hanji standing there in a lab coat, a tablet in one hand, and a pen grasped in her tail. She held her free hand out to me. I took it gratefully, showing her my broken sword that shortly materialised back into my BA at my belt. That was all the answer she needed. I pulled my shirt up over my head and started using it as a towel against my forehead.

"Well, your vitals are all stable, blood pressure normal, heart rate increased, but that's to be expected. But..." She dragged out the last vowel as she peered closer to her tablet. I asked what it was as I walked over to the washing basin, rinsed my face and got a drink of water. I let the soothing liquid refresh my lips before taking a much needed skull of it. I wiped the excess drops from my lips as I as I asked again with a muffled "But what?"

"I mean, for the amount of... umm. let's just call it 'Titan Abilities' that you used, your sanity is still pretty intact."  
"Sanity?" I questioned.

"I mean, going out of control. When that happens, your body fills with this weird substance that is sort of like adrenalin that makes your eyes glow, fangs out, claws out. You know like-"  
"Yea, yea I know." I interrupted. I didn't need to be reminded of what Armin had become. That wasn't his fault, no matter how much he said it was. It just filled me with guilt whenever I thought of it.

"So basically. I can use my elemental connections, without being filled with this weird titan adrenalin thing that could make me go crazy?" Hanji nodded very enthusiastically. She was thoroughly enjoying finding more and more about Titans through me. It sometimes worried me how much she actually got into it though. Just slightly. After ringing out my shirt of the sweat and sliding it back on, I noticed Hanji with her index finger in her mouth and an inquisitive look in her eyes as she stared down at the ground. _This can't be good._

"I want to try something." _Here we go._

"RIVAILLE! SET THE ENVIRONMENT SETTING TO THE ONE ARLERT ALWAYS USED!" She called out to the dark titan up at the computers. Though I didn't hear a response, I knew he heard by the beginning of the lights starting to dim down, signalling that a simulation would soon take place. I went to protest as I was nowhere near fully recovered, but Hanji had already pushed me into the middle of the white room where I began.

She placed both her paws on my shoulders as she tapped into my BA with her tail, bringing up this time two katanas like the ones Armin wielded. The two was a lot lighter in my hand than the one, made for quick slices and cuts rather than mine for precision and strength. I adjusted my grip to the lighter weights then looked up at Hanji questioningly.

"I want you to imbue your swords with the elements." She stated simply.

"Come again?"

"Make your swords glow." And with that she quickly ran on all fours back to the computer rooms overhead. _Make my swords glow?_ Did she mean instead of using my hands to manipulate the movements, use the swords? How was I supposed to do that? I didn't get a chance to ask my question as the setting quickly changed from the dim white to quite dark. All I could see was black at first. But that was until my eyes adjusted.

That's when I heard the familiar sound of a rushing stream being filled by the curtain of a waterfall. My tension dropped from my shoulders. I turned around and all the memories from my childhood came back to me. It was an exact picture of Armin and I's 'Tree of Truth'. The place we would go to let out our worries, to talk about dreams, to escape from reality. I felt as though I was in the midst of the last one. Everything was just how I remembered it. The smell of the lilies against the willow, the drops that gleamed in the single white spotlight from its cave-like structure, the subtle squeak of the rodents hiding in the trees talking to the singing birds.

"Eren..." I heard Rivaille's voice call over the PA system.

"What we are about to do... you probably won't like. Armin would never let us do this but for experimental purposes, it is essential." He announced in a blank tone. Confusion once again began to consume me. I went to grab the talisman again out of habit. And once again, I remembered where it actually was.

"What are you going to do!" I yelled as I jumped up onto the rock overlooking the pool of water.

"It's a psychological test, that's all I can tell you at this point in time. But if we do this, we may be able to find a way to stop the transitioning to feral form Titans. Please Eren." He replied. As I looked at my reflection in the pond, I kept my focus on my golden brown eye. I compared myself to how I looked back then to how I was now. It was as if I had aged at least five years since I came here. Mentally, I probably had. As I imagined Armin's rippling reflection next to mine, I remembered why I was here in the first place. I knew that if I did this, it would help Armin.

I stopped looking at the water and instead looked straight ahead. I gripped both blades tighter in my hand and readied myself for what was to come. I called back to Rivaille to start. It didn't take long for the first enemy to jump me from behind the willow and tackle me to the ground. Immediately I used my cyber-like air to throw him off me and into the water so I could regain my footing. But it was clumsy. Holding the sword in my hand somehow blocked the concentration and strength of what I was usually able to conjure.

Not letting it get to me too much, I placed my swords in a guard in front of me and focused on what Hanji said, imbue them with the elements. But the more I tried that the more it slowed me down. I found myself constantly getting knocked down and thrown up against the rocks and into the water. After defeating five or so enemies, another one came out. But he looked different from the ones I had seen. He was a lot less bulky and he didn't run at me like the others did. He slowly made his way toward me, a dark shadowy aura surrounding him. It wasn't until he emerged fully from the darkness that I saw who he was. That dark aura was purple, and it had the same defining glow as was in his eyes and in the magenta streak of blonde hair. It was Armin, in his feral titan form. His fangs dripping with oozing purple liquid, his claws dark and rustic, his usual long flowing hair now matted and spiked in all directions.

"Armin?" I questioned. He smirked as he stood only a few paces away from me.

"Why did you leave me Eren?" He snarled in a deep condescending voice. It sent shivers down my spine, the way he dragged out his vowels like a cunning snake. _This is not him_ something told me _this is just the simulator, don't let him get into your head_. Listening to that little voice, I charged towards the fake demonic Armin. At the last second, he evaded my attack.

"Why are you hesitating Eren?" I hated the way it hissed my name. It made my teeth clench and my stomach boil with hate. I lashed out again, missing by a mile this time. He simply somersaulted over me, landing behind with the conniving smirk still plastered on his face.

"I'll fucking kill you!" I screamed at the monster.

"No you won't!" It scoffed. Within a split second it was right in front of me, with a claw at the base of my chin. My breath hitched.

"Because you love me!" I pushed his face away from mine and went to to stab him again but he was gone in a flash. I quickly peered in every direction searching for him, until I heard his growling voice from behind me making me jump around.

"Did you honestly think I would ever feel the same?" He was hovering above the water now, slowly moving closer and closer towards me.

"Think about it Eren, you're weak." I wanted so badly to retaliate but my muscles were fixed in place and I had lost control of my voice.

"You couldn't save me because you were weak, you didn't kill yourself because you were weak." My lips began to quiver.

"NO YOUR WRONG! I'M GETTING STRONGER! I WILL PROTECT YOU!" I screamed out through exasperated tears that I forced back.

"Will you?" I stopped breathing. Was he right? Did he not see me the same way because of what I did to him? It was my fault he turned into that thing in the first place. Why should he think anything of me?

I couldn't look him in the eye. I was so small compared to him. A lamb to a lion, a rat to a hawk... a human to a titan. He had moved so close to me, that his violet aura had now consumed me as well as him and I hadn't even realised. I could feel the dark matter emitting around me. Nausea and exhaustion began to kick in as he wrapped his arms around me and pulled my ear against his dark lips

"You've said that you would protect me for so long, but look where you are now. I was so happy when I found out I could leave. Because I will never be coming back"

_No..._

"I never really wanted you."

_Stop..._

"I'm going to die out there Eren."

_You're wrong..._

"You will never be able to touch me..."

_Enough..._

"...again."

"ENOUGH!" I pushed his last whisper out of my ear with all my strength. Anger and hatred consumed me from head to toe.

"WHEN I MAKE A PROMISE, I NEVER BREAK IT! I PROMISED TO PROTECT ARMIN! NOT YOU! I NEVER LOVED YOU! IT IS YOU THAT HAS CAUSED HIM PAIN AND IT IS YOU WHO WILL DIE!" I lost all sense of control. The speed, the power, the adrenalin, it all felt so wonderful yet so exotically painful at the same time. Nothing was registering as I attacked the fake Armin with all of my rage. It was when he leaped backwards, hitting his head against the rock wall that I finally took a look at my weapons.

Like Hanji had asked me to do, the swords were glowing. They were glowing in blue-black pixeled flames. Flames of determination to start a new. To get rid of this so called 'Monster' that Armin always talked about and bring him home. I had no idea how I did it but I didn't care. The fake demonic Armin peered up at me with sorrowful eyes, thick black tears streaming down his face as he whimpered my name. _No, this was the test Rivaille was talking about_ , I couldn't succumb to my weakness. I would save him, and this was the only way. I swung both swords down to the ground in front of me sending a trail of the same flames down towards the simulated Armin. As soon as the path reached the quivering hologram, the dark aura immediately collapsed and the demon had evaporated into nothingness.

I couldn't help but smile and fall to my knees in relief. The room slowly turned back to a fluorescent white, the smells and grassy textures leaving with it. The sound of distant clapping instantly made me shoot around like a rabbit on edge. The dark wings were unmistakable and that playful grin was definitely genuine. Rivaille crossed his arms over his chest and folded his wings back. Behind him I saw Ymir, Marco and Hanji all with dropped jaws and wide eyes. I waved at them cautiously with a nervous smile. Rivaille tossed me a proper towel and a bottle of water.

"Well done Jaeger, I'm impressed."

 

\---

 

It had been a week since I started training with imbued weapons. A week since the scouts had left. As I stared over the lookout of Utgard I couldn't help but wonder where they were now, what they were doing. Best possible scenario, they've caught Annie, she's willingly told them everything she knows about Petra and the doctor and now they are confronting whoever the doctor is. But I think it's obvious that, that's probably a long shot.

The sun was setting over a beautiful layered sky. The velvet green canopy creating an easing contrast with purples, pinks and oranges that littered the dusk. I could hear the slight calls of the forest birds through my concentrated titan hearing, making me feel at ease. Ymir and Marco had helped me a lot through this week. Not just for my benefit, but for theirs. It was a good distraction for them. I now could honestly say that it was no longer a problem to channel any element, use my speed and my strength when needed and my enhanced eyes and hearing when necessary. It still took a little bit more concentration than others but that just came with practice. Hanji continued to do daily blood tests and vital checks every time I trained to see my progress as I got better with my abilities. Each day she looked more and more excited when the results came in, though she never told me exactly what they were.

That first attempt at imbuing my weapons was definitely the hardest. As much as I tried to ignore it, that virtual demon Armin's snarling voice couldn't help but linger in the back of my mind. _You're weak... Why are you hesitating Eren?_ It all crumpled in my mind like a lost idea thrown away. One hand, I believed what the real Armin said and what my instincts told me, that I would save him. On the other, I had those demons inside my head. Through that psychological test though, Hanji was able to collect some valuable data into the connection between elementa binding and the titan's emotions, coming to the conclusion that it could be linked to how your soul interprets it, which is why some different titan's conjurings look different.

I was enjoying the serene wind against my hair and face when a loud bang and aggressive yelling sounded from below me at the runway. Marco suddenly appeared behind me with a worried look on his face.

"You need to come down, Rivaille's having a fit." I wasted no time. I withdrew my BA and went to leap down below to the runway. But something suddenly stopped me. A splitting pain in my temple that caused me to grasp my head in my free hand. I closed my eyes and a painful image popped into my head. It was only for a split second every time I would blink. But each time there was a different scream. There was different shade of red with each image that popped into my head. One I was able to distinguish from the rest. It looked like Isabel. She was being tied up by a Scaled, her eyes and ears in it's feline state as she screamed at the top of her lungs from the pain of the chains around her chest. As quickly as the pain came on, it left. I no longer heard anything or saw anything apart from what was in front of me. _What the hell was that?_

I couldn't think anymore of it, as the yelling and screaming from down below began to grow. I pushed the odd pictures out of my head and proceeded to jump down the runway and see what all the fuss was about. When I turned around there was a whole crowd of titans at the arched entrance. I sped over to where I saw Rivaille raging.

I didn't bother to look at what it was he was so furious about, instead just asking him. He stopped his ranting and pointed past my head. When I looked around, one of our massive strength deviants were holding up two others.

"We caught these two trying to steal food from our supplies, they aren't ours." The greater titan stated as he dropped them to the floor with a thud.

"See, I told you we shouldn't of come here. We should've just got that rabbit while we could." The one on the left stated. Wait. _That can't be?_  
"But I could smell the cooked meat from a mile away, and it smelt sooo good."

It couldn't of been. My eyes widened as my smile did. But I knew those voices so well and no other idiots would talk like that at a time like this.

"Sasha!? Connie!?" I cried out. Both of them turned around and looked up at me with their mouths dropped. It was them. Though Connie looked the same he had become a lot more muscular then I remembered, unlike Sasha who had completely changed, who now had ears and goat like legs like Marco. No... Don't tell me they too had...

"EREN!" They screamed in unison, both wrapping me in a tight hug instantly. I wrapped my arms around them as tight as I could. _Why did this have to happen to them..._

 

\---

 

_Jean: "Did you know those two newbies?"_

**Armin: "Yeah, they were my friends from school. I hate that they were turned though. Does Farlan even know where we are going?"**

_Jean: "We have Isabel tracking Annie's scent and that bald one did say that a girl helped them escape, it could've very well been Annie."_

**Armin: "I hope it was. There had to be a reason she did this. I knew her too well. She's too kind to be able to do this without a motive."**

_Jean: "You trust too easy Armin. It will become your fatal flaw."_

**Armin: "Wait, Jean... Have you seen the others?"**

_Jean: "I thought they scouted ahead while we rested?"_

**Armin: "No... I- I can hear them... we're- we're being ambushed!"**


	35. Bringing the Gang Back

To call the emotion that staggered my mind shocking was an understatement. I honestly thought I would never see Connie and Sasha again. After leaving them back at that plaza ages ago, I truly believed that that those were the last moments I would ever spend with them. The constant worrying if they were doing okay was put at ease yet I was so conflicted. I was ecstatic to see my friends again. At the same time, as I continued to hold them in my grasp, dread crept its way back into my heart. The only reason I could feel this sense of homecoming once more was because they went through the same thing Armin did. They too were Titans.

It was unmistakeable. The symbol of the 'S' within a diamond surrounded by symmetrical claw marks had been imprinted onto Connie's bicep. The mark of the titan that they all had except for me. Sasha's legs had misshapened into the similar anatomy of a goat, only she didn't have antlers quite like Marco and her legs didn't have that same wire-haired texture. Her appearance likened more to a ram, with soft bountiful brown fur covering her legs like leg warmers along with ivory horns that curled behind her ears. I couldn't imagine how difficult it must of been to put that usual ponytail back into her hair.

"Eren who are these people?" Rivaille inquired, quite annoyed behind me. I responded with the truth. That they were my friends from Shiganshina. Connie, being the idiot he was decided it best to bow to Rivaille when I introduced his name, Sasha following his actions when I introduced her. Rivaille's expression didn't change, infact he seemed even more vexed than before. I made it mental note to facepalm myself once I had some time to alone.

"How did you find us?" The dark Titan directed towards the two idiots still holding their heads down. They lifted them slowly then looked towards each other. Marco suggested it would be a good idea to go somewhere a little more private, as they would probably be a little shaken up. Rivaille agreed and nodded towards Ymir, who yelled for everyone to get lost leaving the rest of us to walk up into the meeting room.

As we entered into the doorway, Rivaille repeated his question again, a lot more firm than he had done before. It was only in this much brighter lighting that I could really tell what they had been through. They looked incredibly malnourished. Sasha's fur from her legs stopped just under her navel though it was hard to tell under her oversized sweater and mini skirt that had been tattered and ripped as anything. Twigs and leaves were staggered all throughout her hair with dirt patches covered her hands and face. Connie was much the same minus the hair, one leg of his jeans half gone, the other stained with blood and dirt. I found it amazing that he was able to keep his vest intact though. Sasha was the first one to speak.

"We were just walking through the forest and we happened to come across this amazing smell of roasting meat. And then we found this place." Connie quickly nodded after her, feeling quite intimidated by the dark shorter Titan's presence. Rivaille showed no indication of change as Sasha spoke. His arms remained crossed and eyebrows furrowed, staring the quivering Titans down with a scowl.

"Then explain the weapons. How did you get those?" He asked, pointing towards the two BA's that Connie had strapped to the waistband of his jeans. I could tell they were beginning to get worried now. And the more they squirmed the more Rivaille became agitated.

"You're fucking spies aren't you?" He accused. I had forgotten that these were my friends, not theirs. They really had no reason to trust them. And it was clearly evident as Rivaille's voice became more and more violent, that his intentions weren't to make peace.

"WHAT! NO!?" Connie blurted out in defense.

"You were sent by Annie weren't you!"

"Rivaille calm down!" I finally yelled, stepping in front of him and placing my hands on his shoulders in an attempt of comfort.

"They aren't spies, they're just confused," I began, feeling Rivaille tense up as I removed my hands from him. As he stared daggers into my eyes though, I could understand his accusation. I slowly turned and decided to ask my own question.

"What happened after Armin and I ran?" Connie looked to Sasha as she nodded toward him.

"Look man I'll tell you, but I ain't gonna sugar coat it." _That doesn't sound good_.

"Just say what you can."

 

\---

 

Marco was just walking in with some spare clothes and towels as Connie began to explain. Ymir brought a bucket full of warm water for Sasha and Marco sat himself behind Sasha, pulling the band out of her hair and started tending to it. Connie started at the beginning. After he saw Armin and I shoot down the soldiers that were blocking our exit, he, Sasha and Mikasa attempted to make a beeline to the nearest possible exit that wasn't the same way we were. Connie knew this was bound to happen eventually through his frequent talks with Armin in his mind and already had some form of a plan in his head. I still couldn't believe Connie was able to keep this hidden from everyone, being the massive gossip guru he was. They had almost made it to an exit when a group of soldiers finally caught up to them and shot them down with tranquilizers. At least, they thought they were soldiers.

The next thing they remembered was waking up chained in a dark cell. He didn't want to get into details, so simply called it 'horrific'. At first they thought it was just a strong intensive prison as they were witnesses to a mass murder but the days that followed, quickly changed that view. For days they were left there with little to no food and water. One by one they were taken in by a woman with red hair, feline like ears and a sleek tail. I could only assume that he was referring to Petra.

Mikasa was first to be turned, becoming a clawed Titan like Petra. Then Connie as a deviant and Sasha as an elfen. They had no idea how long they were being kept in the cages. Connie and Sasha had adapted quite well to their transformations, finding their Titan abilities quite quickly and using them to pass the time. Mikasa however hadn't kept her own like they had. Connie explained how he watched in horror as Mikasa lost all her humanity, becoming a mindless flesh-eating monster that was slowly driven to insanity. She ended up being 'put down' as Petra had called it as she was a hazard to everyone's health.

Another part of my family gone. Mikasa and I were never close like I was to Armin, but she was still one of my best friends and one of the friends I had known the longest. It hit me hard knowing that I would never see her again. A girl as smart and as talented as her should've grown up to be a successful business woman or an actress or something other than a mindless corpse because of who she happened to be associated with. She deserved so much more. I couldn't let guilt override me though. It wasn't my fault she was gone. It was theirs.

"So how did you get out?" Marco added in as he brushed out the grime coming from Sasha's hair.

"Some girl was thrown in next to Connie where Mikasa used to be. It was a blonde girl. She never told us her name but I kept her whispering that she was sorry to Armin. I think that woman, the one you keep calling Petra called her something starting with 'A'." Sasha said calmly. Everyone in the room froze. Ymir sped her way over to Sasha, practically knocking Marco out of the way as she gripped Sasha by her collar.

"Was it Annie? Where is she? I swear to God I will fucking kill her!" Ymir growled into her face. Sasha desperately gripped and clawed at her hands but it was too strong for her even to budge. Connie screamed at her to let go but she didn't oblige. Instead, a small storm cloud spontaneously appeared above her, a small bolt of lightning striking her hand with a bang. Ymir immediately backed off caressing the sensitive wound on the back of her hand. It wasn't until I saw Sasha's side smirk that I realised that that was her Titan ability.

"Pretty cool huh?" She directed towards me. She twirled her fingers in a clockwise direction with a click, making the cloud disperse as quickly as it appeared.

She then sighed and turned back to Ymir and the others. "Honestly, I have no idea. After I talked to her about Armin she said that she would help us escape. She gave us these tablet things, taught us how to use them and then got us out. We almost got caught but she gave herself up instead. She told us to go in this direction and that when we see a big metal dome that we should go in there. We saw Armin on the way there and he told us where to go." Ymir's face dropped as did mine. Though I was relieved that Armin and the others were still safe, I really had no clue who's side Annie was on anymore. One minute she was trying to rip my throat out, the next she's trying to save people who knew was friends with Armin? It just didn't add up. The incredibly eerie silence was interrupted by a violent swing of the meeting room door.

Hanji came bursting in, practically breaking the door off it's hinges as she caught her breath.

"Sir.... We just received... a transmission... from... the elite squad..." She exclaimed in between gasps for air. I don't think she ever ran that fast in her life. Rivaille's face immediately changed. He zoomed out of the room gliding with his wings. Everyone followed him up to Hanji's lab where Rivaille immediately brought up the holographic image.

It was horrible. I heard Sasha hide a gasp underneath her hand behind me. Farlan was at the centre of the transmission, red pouring from the top of his head, soaking his dirty blonde hair and streaming down his eyes. He had cuts all over his cheeks and his eyes had become violet. The vile noise of roars, blades and bodies being thrown against rocks and trees made it increasingly hard to focus on what Farlan was saying. In a static-like frantic voice the only things I was able to make out over all the commotion was, "We were ambushed... requesting immediate aid... too many... taking us captive... most wiped out... we should of listened to you Rivaille... I'm sorry... "

Behind him chaos had ensued. It was our Titans against the scaled. I caught a glimpse of Jean in the back with his daggers, being pinned down by a familiar red head with a sleek brown tail. I turned to Marco to see him clutching his stomach and tears threatening to spill. All I could see was the people behind him. Isabel had come around and wrapped her kusarigama around Petra's neck throwing her off Jean so he could stand again. But that didn't stop the worrying. As the transmission ended, for a split second you could see a scaled holding someone in chains with their hands tied around their back as they kicked and struggle to come loose. It was unmistakably the one person who I had wished It wasn't. Why Armin? Why him?

Everyone was silent. I instantly looked to Rivaille hoping he would know what to do, but he seemed just as distraught as us. His eyes were wide and his nails were slowly being chewed up as he breathed roughly.

"What do we do?" Hanji asked Rivaille in a quiet supportive tone. Rivaille took his nails away from his mouth and looked away slowly.

"Nothing."

"Come again?" Connie asked.

"Nothing. We do nothing. If we go we would end up just like them and there would be no saving us." I was in complete and utter shock.

"So we are just going to leave them to be tortured?!"

"If it means we stay alive, yes that's what we're doing."

"Do you even know what you're saying!" My tone was getting louder and more aggressive by the minute. The overwhelming anxiety from the time we were wasting starting to boil over and make my inner fire sizzle.

"We have to go help them!"

"I AM NOT TELLING YOU AGAIN JAEGER!" Rivaille bellowed, pushing me up against the wall with his elbow across my neck. My head smacked the iron wall hard, sending a crashing silence throughout all of Utgard.

"My decision is final." He breathed. "We stay here." No one else dared speak after that. Even Ymir had ceased to move her lips. Slamming my palms into Rivaille's chest, I forced him off me, storming out of the dark lab and back down to my own room.

I didn't care what they said, I was going after them. I would go alone if that was what it took. Once Rivaille and the others were gone I could easily track the destination from which that transmission was recorded and locate their coordinates from there. I was sick of being told to stay put when I knew I could help. It didn't matter what it cost. I had to keep my promise. I was going to bring Armin home.

 

\---

 

It wasn't difficult to sneak into Hanji's lab when everyone was asleep. Even the guards didn't really care, they knew me too well to think anything bad of it. It was even less difficult to trace the IP address of the transmission message. I inputed the coordinates into my BA and withdrew my katana. With as much stealth as I could muster, I tip-toed out onto the moonlight runway. As I was about to make a dash for it, a small wait sounded from behind me.

In the darkness of the night, Marco came running with his double crescent blades toward me panting.

"Don't think you're going alone you idiot." No, I didn't want him getting in trouble. I knew if anything happened to him while he was with me, I would not only blame myself but Jean would be broken. I knew how much he cared for him, because Jean looked at Marco the same way I looked at Armin.

"Look I know you're worried Marco, but we all are. I don't want you getting hurt because of me and-"  
"I don't care what happens to me Eren! I'm sick of being stuck here all the time. I want to help, I want Jean and I to be safe like... like we used to be." Marco whispered as he looked down at the ground. It only occurred to me then that Marco had always been in the same boat as me. He was the healer, the one left on the sidelines giving aid to everyone. He wanted to fight.

"Hey, don't forget about us!" A sweet bubbly voice called out from behind Marco. The thump of Connie and Sasha's sprint immediately unhinged whatever element of stealth and invisibility we may of once had. Unlike Marco, these two had no training whatsoever. I would not be able to trust myself to let them go if I were to scout ahead by myself. It was way too risky.

"Guys you know I love you, but there is no way you're are capable of-" I was cut off by an arrow flying past my left ear, while a knife was projected past my right at the exact same velocity. Shaking my head from the shock, I noticed that Sasha had a compound bow tucked in her grasp, while Connie was twirling throwing knives in between his fingers. Both had that pixel neon blue texture.

"Not capable of what now?" Sasha asked sarcastically. This was going nowhere. There was no point in arguing. The more time I wasted standing here trying to get them to go back was more time that those Titans, presumably ones working for the doctor, had to torture my friends. I finally submitted and said they could come. As I was about to turn and go, a dark winged silhouette blocked out the moonlight from above. _Shit_.

Rivaille slowly landed in front of me with his scythe in his grasp.

"I knew you brats wouldn't listen." I was about to start arguing again, say that nothing he said would stop me from leaving, when he instead starting speaking.

"There is one condition that you idiots go on this suicide mission." Hanji and Ymir armed with her bo staff slowly emerged from the arch of Utgard and onto the runway next to Rivaille.

"You let me come with you." I shot him a skeptical eye.

"You are not the only one who is at risk of losing someone you care about." He stated bluntly. "Two-thirds of my soul are literally at risk of death. You save your family, and I'll save mine." I couldn't help but feel a smile spread across my face. We all had someone we loved on that mission. I nodded in agreement as the seven of us, all armed and ready, headed out to save the people we cared about.

**_This time Armin, I will save you_.**

 

\---

 

_Jean: "What have you done with Armin?!"_

**Farlan: "Give it up Jean, they won't answer you."**

_Jean: "ANSWER ME!"_

**Farlan: "Jean, get a fucking grip. What the fuck do you think they are doing to him?! Face reality for godsake. It's over, they've got the original gene back. There's no stopping them now. Human's are done for."**

_Jean: "What on earth are you talking about?"_

**Farlan: "It doesn't matter anymore. We won't be alive to witness it."**

_Jean: "Witness what?"_

**Farlan: "History repeating itself."**


	36. Soundless

We soon neared a small riverbank. There we stopped to rest, and it wasn’t until I took my first refreshing sip of the cool natural water that I noticed the small orange glint of the sun reflecting in the ripples. We had been travelling all through the night, yet it seemed it had only been but an hour. The evening chill still lingered as dew drops on the grass, the early morning birds singing their melody in amongst the trees.

I splashed my face and took the opportunity to bask in the glow of the rising sun. Droplets splashed against my eyelids and nose causing them to tickle. I raised the blade of my sword up in front of me to sharpen, and instead saw a mirrored Connie and Sasha splashing water onto one another. I smiled at their immaturity, glad that atleast some people weren’t caught in the same state of worry as I was. I insisted that we should’ve soldiered on but I didn’t think Ymir could stand one more word of Connie’s whining and Sasha’s stomach grumbling. Marco’s abilities could only work to an extent, so I didn’t argue for too long.

It was lucky that Connie’s new Titan ability was tracking. He couldn’t explain it, but apparently that’s how he was able to find Utgard so quickly, he followed the ‘scent’ as he called it of Armin. This was what he had been doing all night. I could imagine it would be tiring so I didn’t blame him for wanting to take a break.

Grasping a sturdy overhanging branch, I hoisted myself up onto it and hung my legs over. Despite the constant arguing of Ymir to Sasha and Hanji trying to calm them both down, it seemed quiet. But not eerie like I usually found it. It was peaceful. The way the water bubbled slightly down the stream and the clouds formed serene images in the gentle winds.

A small chirp suddenly caught my attention. I peered behind me to see two bright pink birds with a grey crest feeding on the seeds on the forest floor. I wasn’t sure what species they were, I was sure Armin would’ve known.

As I continued to stare at the pair of birds in amongst the dead orange leaves, I noticed something remarkable. They wouldn’t eat at the same time. One would pick it’s share of the seeds and insects on the ground, while the other held its crest up on alert and peered around. Occasionally they would switch positions with a small high-pitched sound. It was as if while one of the birds ate, the other would stand guard, making sure no predators were nearby.

I shifted my weight on the branch causing it to creak and the bird standing guard let off an irritating squark, signalling the other to take off. They sped out of the forest, leaving a trail of falling leaves where they went. I continued to stare at the spot where they left the canopy as an extra weight decided to join me on the branch. Rivaille, hung his wings low behind him, with one knee tucked to his chest as he looked up to where the birds had left as well.

“Galahs.” He said.

“One of the smartest birds I’ve come across, you’ll never see one on it’s own. There’s always atleast one there to make sure the other’s don’t get hurt. A guardian if you will.” It became apparent that this was probably the first time Rivaille had ever made idle chit-chat with me. Heck, this was the first time I’ve ever seen him make idle chit-chat with anyone, even Isabel and Farlan. His head lowered slowly, his gaze never leaving the ground.

“Eren I owe you an apology.” He claimed. I turned to see him nervously twirling his scythe in the dirt, making the mark of the Titan in the dirt. The ‘S’ with claws. I asked what he was apologising for, and it took him such a while to answer, that I almost thought he didn’t hear me.

“For underestimating you.” I swung one leg over, straddling the branch to face him.

“Why does that require an apology?”  
“Cause I should've trusted you. In this corrupt society we live in now, trust is all we have. If not you I should’ve atleast trusted Armin.” Jumping off the branch, his scythe materialised back into his BA. The leaves rattled as his wings brushed against them. I followed suit, sending the branch bouncing as my weight left it.

I followed Rivaille to the water’s edge where he sat on a rock and begun skipping rocks into the calm river. Sasha’s giggling could still be heard in the back behind the patter of the streamlined pebbles hopping along the water. Even the way he threw rocks was graceful. I knew he sensed my confusion when he sighed heavily.

“Look, you remind me of someone alright… That’s why I didn’t like you at first, that’s why I didn’t trust you.” I remained silent, unsure of what to say. Though feeling a little hurt at the fact he didn’t trust me before, I felt comfort in knowing he did now.

“The person I knew was hotheaded,” _Comfort decreasing…_ “temperamental” _Slowly dying…_ “extremely justice-driven to the point where it was annoying,” _Yep, comforts gone._ “And probably what caused me to care about human life more than anything.” _Wait what!_ Intrigued, I dared to ask the identity of this person. What came out of his lips was the last name I thought I would hear.

“Levi Ackerman.” I had become soundless again. And extremely self-conscious. I reminded him of his past? Of when he was Levi, not Rivaille? It just seemed bizarre. We weren’t anything alike. Sure we both had people we care about but so does everyone at some point right?

Though it seemed like he had spilled out his guts to me, I couldn’t help but wonder why now of all times he would decide to share something so personal. He still seemed like he had something to share, as he twirled a thin grey pebble in his hands that had been in his grasp for the past few minutes.

“Rivaille, is everything… okay?” His eyes widened. The pebble in his hands was consumed by the water with an echoing plop. His breathing hitched as did the wind around us. It was like everything had stopped as Rivaille was buried deep in thought.

“You connected to Armin didn’t you? Just before you came down to see Sasha and Connie?” At first I didn’t know what he had meant. But after searching through my memories I remembered collapsing to the ground. Though it was only for a moment I remember seeing Isabel struggling in chains. I remember hearing her scream. I remember feeling restrained. My head turned violently towards Rivaille as the realisation occurred to me.

“How did you know?” I inquired. He made a slight ‘tch’ and stood up to go back to where the others were.

“Eren, do you have any family?” The question caught me completely off guard. It made no sense, and it definitely didn’t answer my worrying. Knowing I wasn’t likely to get an answer out of him anytime soon, I decided to play whatever game this was. I stuttered an unsure, “Ye- yea. My mother. My father died while in Mitras during the war when I was young.”

“Do you have a sister!” He inquired hurriedly, as if it was the most important piece of information in the world. I stumbled back on my hands at his aggressive tone.

“N- No, I’m an only child!?” He suddenly calmed down, almost seeming shocked by what I had to say. It was still quiet. Even the arguing from the girls had ceased. Only the small swish of the water against the bank was evident and the occasional call of the galahs behind, but it was no longer peaceful. I couldn’t help but feel on edge. After an agonising long moment of silence I finally asked, “Why are you asking me these things?”

He breathed a heavy sigh and only jumped off his rock and walked the other way his dark wings dragging behind him.

“Go talk to your Mother when all of this over. She is your family, Eren. Don’t take it lightly. Right now my family is in danger and now hers is too. Atleast let her know you're safe.”

“What’s this got to do with me not having a sister?” He stopped in his tracks yet remained silent. I crossed my arms, now slightly irritated. I understood that he was worried about Isabel and Farlan, the family in danger. But my Mother probably already thought I was dead by now, or worse, from what I’ve heard Connie say, wishing I was. I was a fugitive, and he knows this. I could never set foot in Trost or even Shiganshina again. Heck, I probably can’t be seen by anyone outside of Utgard. But that wasn’t what bugged me the most. I could tell he still had something he wanted to say. Veins in his neck were becoming prominent and the ever so faint twitch of his muscles and wings made that clear.

He finally stopped refusing to look me in the eye and turned around. His mouth opened to say something but the sound was stolen by a high-pitched scream. Sasha’s scream. Rivaille took off on his wings and I sped over to where we had left the others. The grunts and cries of exasperation became clearer as did the snarls of an all too familiar foe. As I entered the clearing, I came face-to-face with a charcoal black Scaled. Oozing purple liquid dripped from its fangs as steam emerged from various cuts over it’s body.

I was no longer afraid of the beast. It would die at my hands, swiftly and painfully. I brought out my katana, immediately coating it in the fiery pixel-like flames and aimed directly for it’s eyes. If it couldn’t see it couldn’t fight. But as I was about to make contact, something caught my eye behind the monster. Sasha was pinned down by a different Scaled while Connie had his throat clutched by another. They both had ranged weapons, so they were struggling to hit the beasts off them. I searched around for Hanji, Ymir, Marco and Rivaille, but noticed they all too had beasts of their own on their tails. Abandoning my precision, I let the blade slide a little lower to cut at it’s neck, immediately springing off it’s tough hide for acceleration towards Sasha.

Bringing my sword up in the air, I propelled it down towards the Titan strangling Sasha, releasing my cyber blue flames towards the beast. It’s grip instantly loosened around her throat as the flickering blue shone in it’s lifeless eyes. No more than five seconds passed before the Titan erupted in flames above her. I sprinted over to Sasha and helped her to her feet, telling her to grab a bow and head up into a tree to snipe. She nodded immediately, wiping the tears from her eyes. I forgot how strong she was mentally. Her bubbly outgoing personality usually masked it pretty well. But now was not the time to be thinking of that.

I looked towards Connie, who was trying as best he could to stab the thick hide of the Scaled with his knives to no avail. As I was about to leap over to him, a sparking grey cloud emerged over them. A bolt of lightning struck the Scaled causing an agonising snarl to escape it’s fangs. This followed by two arrows piercing directly into the Titan’s eyes, courtesy of Sasha above. Taking the opportunity, Connie brought his fists up and punctured his two knuckles into its’ temple. Marco, then suddenly appeared, slicing the beast's neck with his bladed tonfa. The monster burst into ash and evaporated steam before them.

I nodded towards Connie and Marco who gave me a smirk. We began to run towards Rivaille and the others to help but more Scaled suddenly blocked our path. I was about to charge them, until multiple pairs of glowing purple eyes emerged beyond them. Deviants and Clawed were also closing in on us. I hadn’t even realised that I had been backing up so much until I had collided with Ymir, Hanji, Connie, Marco and Sasha. They all had their weapons raised as we had held our backs together in a circle. Rivaille then came crashing down from above us with a massive thud. An arrow had been speared through both his wings. He twitched and groaned as he attempted to come up to his feet in front of us.

I kneeled down to help him up as the enemies around us closed in tighter and tighter. I should’ve predicted this from the beginning. The others were ambushed. And now we were too. It was only at closer inspection that I realised that the arrow had been coated in that thick neon blue Titan poison. I lifted Rivaille’s drooping head in my palms. His eyes remained shut as steam rose from his clawed cheek bones. Blood dripped down his jawline and into his lips. For the first time since I met him, he seemed hopeless. He had lost it all.

“Rivaille…” I whispered. He gripped my arm tightly and raised himself up with groan. I could feel the surrounding Titans nearly on top of us. I had no plan. Rivaille couldn’t protect us. We were done.

“The… notebook.” Rivaille choked out along with a heap of blood that dripped from his lips as he spoke.

“The notebook… the one… Armin gave… Hanji.” His voice had become a whisper and I could feel he was about to fall unconscious, in fact as I looked around at my fellow party members, they too had fallen to the ground. I endeavoured harder to keep Rivaille awake.

“Rivaille! What about the book?! Why do we need it?!” He collapsed in my lap, blood spilling onto my ripped pants. It was only when I looked down that I noticed a strange haze, almost like a lilac fog smothering us. Though I couldn’t smell anything different, it was definitely there. Through the haze I heard Rivaille’s slight whisper, “take… the book… to Carla…”

My eyes widened. A million thoughts scrambled in my head as I tried to make sense of what was happening. All my comrades had passed out, not dead but unconscious. Why was I the only one left standing? I placed Rivaille’s head off my lap and looked around to see the faint outline of the enemy titans still there, only this time, they had masks.

“Well, well. I never thought the newborn would be one of us.” I almost rolled my eyes at the obviousness of the cause of this ambush. That sickly sweet voice that could tear holes through anyone’s heart with a simple sound.

“I guess I shouldn’t be that surprised, given your name and all.” I had no idea what Petra was blabbering on about and frankly I didn’t care. She attacked my friends, she attacked Armin, and now she was going to pay. I lit my blade up with the cyber flames once again and let my rage take over.

“Oh! You got your dad’s genes ‘ay? Funny, I would've thought you’d become the tree hugger like your mother.” I had heard enough, I charged straight for the strawberry blonde with my blade held high. I was millimetres away from slicing her neck when an agonising pain suddenly struck my gut. Peering down, all I could see was a blurred vision of a red-brown tail going straight through my stomach. Her paw struck against my throat as she removed the barbed tail from my stomach, leaving a numbing sensation in my abdominals. My legs lost feeling as she threw me to the ground with a pain stricken thud. She towered over me, her fangs poking out of her blood splattered lips. She crossed her arms through the fog as she slid her tail along my jawline, a sickly grin covering her face. As my vision faded, a pair of pink birds flew in the canopy leaving an irritating squark echoing in my head as I began to let myself go. Just as I was about to let myself fall unconscious, one thought remained. How did Rivaille know my Mother’s name was Carla?

 

\---

 

The sound was deafening. One of the worst noises to hear at anytime of day let alone being woken up to it. It was enhanced by the eerie sense of uneasiness I got from just glancing at my current circumstances. It took a while for my eyes to adjust to the room, it being pitch black with the exception of a candle as the only light source in what looked to be a nineteenth century style prison cell. The dirty air that enveloped me felt as if it was choking me like was being strangled by the tortured souls who had sat at this spot in their final moments When I attempted to move to the bars adjacent me, I felt a heavy weight burdened on my ankle. It was then that the memories came flooding back to me. The mission. The ambush. Armin.

This scene. These circumstances. It all felt too familiar. Like a dream I once had. But more important to me, was determining the identity of that scream. Once more, the cry echoed throughout the dimly lit hallways. There was no doubt now. Fear, anger and determination flooded me as I once again attempted to move towards the bars, forgetting about the shackles attached to a solid-metal ball around my bare blistered ankles. I looked down to my feet and saw that my joints were red and swollen.

The walls like the shackles could have been built at least a hundred years ago judging by the crumbling structure of the clay-brick in it’s staggered formation. This tiny room had no windows, no way of seeing the light that could be out there, no way of telling the time of day. I was cold. Shivering uncontrollably. My gear was taken and all I was left with was my tattered and torn pants along with the musky, no longer long-sleeved shirt which was clinging to my body only by thin frayed ends.

I sunk back to my original sleeping position in defeat. The small sound of water dripping from the roof echoing through the dark corridors interrupted my anguish. To my side there was a small puddle underneath the drops creating that slight rippling effect that I was hearing. As I washed my face in the refreshing water my cheek started to sting, putting my finger to my jawline I felt a gash beginning to scab over. Why wasn’t I healing properly? How long had I been out for? Where was everyone?

It was then that I heard it again, and I knew it was his, his heart-breaking shriek of agony crying through the darkness. My heart began to shatter. I could feel my chest constricting and I sunk to the floor on my knees.

His cry of pain didn’t stop. The hairs on my back and neck were raised, I could no longer hold back the torment built up in the corners of my eye. I was supposed to protect him. There was nothing worse than the sound of the blood-curdling scream of the only person you really care for, knowing you can’t do anything to make their pain go away. I would do anything to trade places with him. The waterfalls protruding out of my eyes mixed with the small pool of blood had created a little source of reflection. I looked into it and saw my dual-coloured eyes staring back. I couldn’t hold back, this was too unbearable. My whole world was crumbling down ontop of me and there was no way I could lift myself up out of the rubble.

“PLEASE… STOP… IT HURTS... EREN… HELP!!” My pupils dilated, I had never been this scared since Armin was taken away from me those many years ago.

“ARMIN!!! HOLD ON!” My voice dominated over his plea’s of freedom. Without even realising what I was doing I lept to my feet and gripped the cold bars between both my hands to pry them open.

“Give it a rest would you Eren.” I stopped my prying and peered behind me. I didn’t even notice them there.

“Farlan? Jean? Wh- what are you doing here?” I clamoured. My fear of what they were doing to Armin had blinded me to the fact that he and I weren’t the only people in this boat. My friends, my comrades we were all here.

“Same as you. We never saw it coming.” Farlan stated as he straightened himself up against the crumbling wall of our cell. It seemed odd that they would have three people to a cell, but then again, there’s not much we could do to get out anyway.

“Where are the others?”

“Scattered. This place is massive. They separated us into a gender and Titan-type. I thi-” Jean was cut off by another ear-piercing shriek from Armin. I clenched my teeth and fists, slamming myself against the bars, trying to pry them open once more.

“Farlan, C’mon help me. You’re a strength Titan right? You can break theses apart no worries.” I exasperated desperately, shaking the iron poles. Farlan just remained there, Jean too bowing his head in defeat.

“They’re imbued with a neutralising additive. Our abilities don’t work down here.”

“WE HAVE TO TRY!” I cried.  
“Eren, I can’t even connect to Armin at all down here. Face it dude, he’s done. It’s over.” No. I wouldn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe it. Not after how far we had come. We are going to go home. Even if that meant we were on the run for the rest of our lives I didn’t care. I promised Armin we would go home and that’s what we’ll do.

Armin’s cries only grew and grew, adding to my suffering and frustration that I couldn’t do anything to help. The knot in my stomach tightened further and further with each shriek. With what little energy I had, I gripped the bar with one hand and pushed my other arm through the gap towards the sounds of his cries. I bellowed out his name one more time, as loud as I could. He needed to know I was there. He needed to know that I would save him.

 

\---

 

**Petra: “Looks like your little boy-toy is trying to help you.”**

_Armin: “Don’t… you fucking… touch him…”_

**Petra: “Okay, _I_ won’t touch him. But I can’t say anything about the Doctor. He has his own plans. And from the looks of these tests, it looks like it will be a success.”**

_Armin: “Whatever it is… you’re planning… I won’t let it happen…”_

**Petra: “Honey, it’s too late. You and Eren are going to be the start of a new era. The start of something wonderful. Get the drill out, lets test his sight rejuvenation.”**

_Armin: “No no no no, please, Don’t-”_   


	37. Soul's Torment

It had always intrigued me. The fact that a person’s breaking point could differ so much from another. I’d first noticed it while I was training. I stayed back late at the dojang one night with a few other team members going to worlds. What I had found was that even though I used the same technique with the same amount of force, each person reacted differently. Ranging from clutching their wound for dear life whilst spitting out derogatory terms, to barely moving a muscle. What I also realised was that it had nothing to do with size, build, gender or anything like that. It was purely mental experience.

But in saying that, the next day I would do the same techniques and different people had different reactions to the day prior. Some of the whiners became warriors and vice versa. This led me to believe that our breaking point is clearly a continuum. Constantly fluctuating from strong to weak, the lowest and highest points determined by our experiences in dealing with various situations.

I had never seen or even heard about Armin’s breaking point continuum ever falling below high. Fear always struck me every time another obstacle would hit him. His mother’s death, his father leaving, the constant bullying, becoming a Titan… protecting me… He always kept a level head. Unlike me who would lash out in anger at the slightest of insults, he would remain calm and resilient through it all. Or if not letting it slide, he would bottle it up and slowly let it infuse into his body where he would let it out on the training dummies. He would get sad, he would get angry, heck, he would even lose his sanity here and there. But never would he lose his humanity.

Even as I sat chained here now, listening to the desperate echoing cries and shrieks for help, I knew he would refuse to break. He wouldn’t give him to them. He would never wish for death. He would let them do whatever they had to do, never giving up. I know that he had told me he had given up when he became a Titan. Those months he spent out in the forest on his own, letting starvation and thirst tease him with death but never giving it. He told me he wanted to die then. That’s when I believed his continuum threshold gave out. That his maximum level was reached and he could no longer take it.

Despite this, I still refused to believe he would cave. I knew he would stay alive. I knew he would. He had too. I may have been ready to give up my life before, but I’m not ready to give up his. I tried with all my might to try and conjure anything. A flame, a spark, a water droplet, anything. Waiting for that familiar tingling sensation to run down my veins and into the tips of my fingers. No pixel-like elementals came.

My mind was in a haze. Every time I got somewhat close, Armin’s shriek cried throughout the halls once more. His voice had become raspy and broken, I could tell he was holding on by split ends, but he was still holding on.

“Eren, you’re wasting your energy. It won’t work in here.” Farlan stated bluntly. I had been going at this for so long. I didn’t want to believe that there was no saving him. I had a promise to fulfill and I wasn’t losing him again.

Though if there was any hope in saving him, it wasn’t going to be done with any of our abilities. If a power titan like Farlan couldn’t break through these walls, perhaps no one could. There was a reason there was no guards around. And it wasn’t because they underestimated us. I finally broke my concentration from my powers and slumped down against the iron cold bars, turning around and letting my back slide against the rust.

My back had been to the other two this whole time and I hadn’t even fathomed the thought that Armin’s suffering would of been taking a toll on them too. I immediately was hit with guilt, realising how arrogant I was for not realising it sooner. Jean had hugged his knees up to his chest, using the cloth from his pants to wipe away the stray tears that spilled from the corner of his eyes. I knew it had to be affecting him as much if not more than me. Though I didn’t understand the whole blood bonding thing, I did have a brief knowledge of souls and how powerful they could be. On the contrary, the intertwining of one’s soul with another and sharing that immense amount of power is about as foreign a concept as blood bonding itself. Either way, he was sharing in the torment of being powerless behind these walls.

Farlan may not have been as close to Armin as us too, but he was still his friend. And I could only imagine the worry of not knowing the condition of Isabel and Rivaille. If Rivaille considered Farlan as part of his family, he obviously reciprocated those feelings. Another shirek reverberated throughout the walls. In the corner of my eye, I could sense Jean closing in on himself more as silent tears drained from his hazel eyes. I didn’t even realise the natural colour of his eyes, I had always seen him with his violet iris like most of the titans had. This place really did drain our power didn’t it?

I couldn’t stand to watch everyone in the room, including myself, lose to our breaking point threshold. This was what they wanted. If they didn’t want us to know, they could've easily masked him or used a soundproof room. They wanted us to hear his pain. They wanted us to break. I had to create distraction. Something that could allow us to still keep our sanity while we came up with a plan of action. I decided to ask the first question that popped into my head.

“Why did Rivaille know my mother’s name was Carla?” I directed to Farlan. Jean’s eyes suddenly reflected the same intrigue as mine while Farlan’s widened in what seemed like terror. I could’ve been misreading the situation but it seemed as though he had no idea that he knew. The shackles clinked together as his nails dug into his palms and he shifted uncomfortably. I was in no hurry for an answer, but the fact that this reaction ensued out of him, only made that patient grow ever weary. I was only happy that the only mark of tear’s left was the dried stains left down his face. I had at least succeeded in distracting the both of them. Though, I may have triggered something in Farlan that had caused the panic to move from Jean into him.

“Is something wrong?” Jean finally chimed in. Farlan’s breathing had become slightly heavier. He took a quick gulp before turning to me.

“Did- Did Hanji ever mention what was in that Journal? The one you and Armin had brought from Trost?” There it was again, that damn notebook from Trost. I had picked it up out of sheer curiosity, but now both Rivaille and Farlan had mentioned it. I mentally smacked myself in the head when I realised I had said that last part out loud. I noticed Jean’s eyes widen when I mentioned that Rivaille had also brought it up, a look of what I swore to be guilt covering his face. Farlan had noticed it too. Suddenly Jean’s anxiety came back, his expression similar to that of Farlan’s when I first asked the question.

“Jean what did you do?!” Farlan insinuated aggressively. Jean palmed his mouth, grabbing it down at his chin in a frustrated motion. His eyebrows furrowed as he let out an exasperated sigh. He knew he did something bad. Farlan instigated the question again. He looked about ready to pulverise him if he didn’t open up his mouth quick. Jean’s hand left his chin and smacked back into the brick wall, the sudden bang leaving small pillars of dirt falling from the roof. His fist remained red and swollen, making me realise that our healing abilities probably wouldn’t work down here either.

“I didn’t think about it at the time…” Jean buried his head in his hands as he continued to cuss to himself in a whisper.

“Jean? Where’s the notebook?”

“When Petra and the other’s attacked Utgard, I noticed she had it. I was able to get it off her but…”

“But what Jean?”

“Annie had asked for it, along with some other documents I also nicked off her.”

“YOU DID WHAT?!” Farlan bellowed, annunciating each syllable as he did. Farlan went to pounce on Jean but a loud clash of iron against iron made him regret that attempt.

“These fucking chains…”

“Look I’m sorry, how was I supposed to know?”

“Do you have any idea what you have done?!” Jean remained silent as Farlan continued to rage through gritted teeth.

“What _has_ he done, Farlan?” I questioned in a more calm tone, eager not to attract any unwanted attention. I was pretty damn sure if Armin could at all hear me screaming his name before, he would of been able to hear this and the last thing he needs was to hear us arguing.

Farlan took a deep breath in an attempt to calm himself.

“What does this book have to do with my mother?” Farlan looked at me with sympathetic eyes.

“I didn’t think Rivaille knew. Isabel told me shortly after you arrived but I never heard her say anything to Rivaille. As far as I was concerned, I thought she was trying to keep it from him.”

“Stop with the pronouns. What the fuck does my family have to do with this?” Even Jean looked puzzled. I thought perhaps he would know too, but as it turned out, he was about as clueless as me. Farlan went to speak again when his eyes suddenly glared daggers at something behind me.

“Guards.”

Instantly I turned around, noticing a black hooded silhouette running down the halls. I didn’t even realise the footsteps coming down the hallway. I readied myself for a tongue lashing, as well as an assassination. I planned somehow strangle them with these chains around my ankles and get them to drop the keys to this damn cage.

“HEY!” An unfamiliar deep voice rang through the halls. Immediately the voice drained out into a grunt of pain, along with constant thump of being hit against a wall, ending with a crash to the floor. I couldn’t see the confrontation through the darkness, but I was able to see the oddly-shaped legs as the guard came to a stand and continued to run towards us.

“What the fuck have you done with Armin!?” Jean yelled behind me. My fists clenched ready to strike, but immediately went loose when I recognised the voice.

“Now, is that anyway to greet your boyfriend?” I almost cried out in relief. Emerging from the shadows, the last person I thought would be our rescuer, removed his hood to reveal his immensely freckled smiling face.

“M- Marco!” Jean stuttered out in delight. Marco worked with incredible haste to grab a piece of paper from his utility belt, going to a panel I hadn’t noticed before on the wall beside the cell. I hadn’t even realised there was no door or lock when I planned to grab the keys off the guard. _That would of been a lost cause. He wouldn’t have had any._ After the subtle beeps of the code being punched in, the bars were gone. It was like they weren’t even there at all.

As soon as the shackles and bars had disappeared, Jean was up and into Marco’s arms at lightning fast speed. Marco caressed his boyfriend's hair in his hands as he continued to smile and shush his boyfriends relieved crying. I decided to test if the bars evaporating away also meant that our abilities came back, clicking my fingers to form a flame in my palm. And there it was. That heavenly cyber-pixel flame that gave rise to my hope.

“How are you using your abilities?” Marco hesitantly asked, pushing Jean away from him. Jean instantly went to see if he could shift into his invisibility but to no avail, giving Marco the same questioning look as me.

“How can you use yours though?”  
“I didn’t breath in the smoke.” Marco answered evasively. “That fog that was around us had titan poison, it stunted our titan abilities and knocked us out.”  
“Then how didn’t you breath it in?” I asked.

“Feign death. It’s an elfen titan ability where you can make your whole body stop for a period of time. Where your heart stops pulsing and your breathing stops though you're still conscious.”

“You are one smart goat.” Jean laughed. Marco pushed him out of the embrace snickering a sly “at least I’m not part horse.” Armin’s familiar scream ceased whatever form of reunion we had..

I didn’t care if it was some miraculous endeavour that I could use my abilities while the others couldn’t. I was out of that cell and I would be taken Armin out of these god forsaken walls as well. I went to speed out of there straight to where the scream was coming from when Farlan put a hand out and stopped me. Farlan gave me an incredulous stare, warning me to stay back. I was about to break through his barricade when not only did I realise that his strength was back also, but Armin’s scream had broken off into silence. It didn’t faded out, it crashed. A massive bang making the walls shake and his shriek cease.

I wasn’t going to bother asking Farlan how he also had the abilities back, I had to know what had happened. I turned back to Jean, thinking back to when he was chained up at Isayama and Armin fell into a trance as he was being tortured. If something happened to Armin, Jean would react. The titan poison may have altered our abilities but it didn’t affect their bond, that much was evident from being in the cell with him. It was silent for only a brief moment, before Jean had fallen to the ground clutching his chest as he gasped in agony. He was clawing at the side with his heart.

“Don’t you dare Eren… we… we need a plan… he’s not dead yet…” Jean breathed as Marco began his Latin healing chant on him.

“Yet!? Are you fucking kidding me we need to go get him! NOW!”

“There are too many of them Eren, we would never get him out of here alive.” Marco was definitely right there. I saw how many people were out there when we were ambushed, and we had some of our most experienced Titans there. I knew Armin would've said the same thing. We had to plan this out first.

“Where are the others?” I asked desperately. Farlan crossed his arms and hung his head low.

“Most of them are dead, Isabel and Krista I know are alive though.”

“Then it’s settled. Marco! You and take Farlan and Jean and go free the others. I’ll go find Armin.” I turned around to start running, but Jean’s exhausted voice brought me to a halt.

“Oi, I’m coming with you. You’ll have a better chance of not dying if I’m there with you.” As much as I hated to admit it, he was right. His connection to Armin made him a lot powerful than me, even if he was in pain. I nodded, thankful that he agreed to the idea. I glanced to Marco and Farlan, who although both hesitant also agreed. Farlan called for Marco to go, but Jean took his arm before they left.

“I’ll meet you when this is over alright, we’ll go someplace nice. Away from all this.” Jean stated calmly. Marco nodded, giving a soft kiss to his lover before he ran after Farlan. Jean then turned to me and gestured down the hall.

“He’s gotta be down here somewhere yeah?” I replied with a sound of agreement as we sprinted through the darkness towards where we could hear the distant screaming. It seemed as though this flaming torch lit corridor went on for miles. There was no door, passageway or even a cornering off in sight. We could of very well had been walking in circles and never have known it, the corridor was that long.

He had to be around here somewhere, I wasn’t about to give up that easily. The echo of our footsteps throughout the corridor suddenly decreased to just one pai. I turned around to see Jean staring at his feet with wide eyes.

“What the fuck man c’mon!” I barked, but he didn’t move. He suddenly turned towards the wall and put his hands on the filth covered brick as if inspecting each and every clay bubble.

“He’s behind here.” He claimed. He brought his shoulder back, attempting to deliver a solid punch through the wall. What he succeeded in however was the dislocation of his shoulders, the large pop replacing the echo of our footsteps. He cursed out in pain, maneuvering his arm to put the joint back into place with a crack while insisting “I know he’s there, I can feel him.”

Staring at the wall, I realised that it was probably the same sort of thing as our cell. The walls very well may not even be there just as the bars were. Bringing my fist back in a guard I lined myself up ready to strike. With all the strength I could muster, I delivered my fist straight for the bricks, never once doubting my ability. There was no pain. I felt nothing but my fast sliding through the structure like a knife through butter. Time had slowed down. I must have suddenly become hearing impaired as the sound that came from the crumbling clay formation around my fist did not match what I was seeing. I expected to hear a large crash along with the subtle falling of the brick structure disintegrating. Instead, what I heard along with the fragmented brick structure, was the brick falling on a rusted navy metal. The same sort of metal that was used on the walls of Utgard. The kind that would of been used for old industrial units.

What Jean and I walked into was nothing short of that. I hadn’t even realised the bareness of my feet until I stepped onto the cool iron into what I believed to be an abandoned warehouse. There were large windows that were smashed and a useless whirling fan that spun at snail speed overhead, leaving an eerie creak as it went. We had emerged from a nineteenth century prison into the top level of an abandoned industrial unit. I walked to the edge of the top level where a railing would of been years ago and noticed that on the ground level there was a gaping hole that looked like it had been caused by an earthquake. Not only that, but next to the ditch on the other side of the large warehouse was a woman in a long white lab coat.

Though she had her back to me, I could tell from the curve of her body and the way she held her hands on her hips that they were definitely a female. I went to immediately jump down off the ledge, then decided otherwise as the gaping hole was right below me. Instead I sped around until I was clear to jump onto the concrete floor, Jean falling closely behind. I made no attempt at stealth as it was obvious that she knew we were there.

As soon as my feet hit the ground, I heard a cackling laugh come from the woman. Now at closer proximity, I realised it wasn’t a hand on the coat, but a paw. Her matching coloured tail swaying just below where the coat ended. She turned her head around ever so slowly, that strawberry blonde hair doing nothing but leaving a horrific taste in my mouth as she gave an evil grin.

“WHERE IS HE, PETRA?” Jean yelled. I instinctively went for my BA to pull out my sword when I realised that it wasn’t there. We were both completely unarmed.

“See for yourself.” She chuckled as she then turned her full body around to show us a sight that made my stomach churn. Armin’s skin had gone as pale as a ghost, his eyes struggling to stay open as dirt and blood stained his entire body. He was covered in a sickly sweat, his black hood ruined to the point where you could no longer call it rags. What hurt the most though was that although Petra had an arm wrapped around his neck closing off his airways, his arms dangled by his sides useless. All his limbs were simply just hanging there.

I would of thought he was dead if he hadn’t squeaked out my name in an almost inaudible rasp. My eyes welled up with tears as Petra scoffed and threw his limp body down like a rag doll onto the floor with a thud in front of us. Visions of my past flooded my head as I remembered back to when he was thrown like that against the wall of the bridge and then pushed into a white van. He had fought then. He had fought to protect us both. But he now laid half-dead in my arms. I hadn’t even realised I had rushed over to him until his head was in my lap and I was caressing his hair slowly.

“E...ren… you… you shouldn’t have come…” He breathed out following by a hollowing coughing fit. I immediately rolled him over and lifted his chin, letting him vomit out a thick oozing black liquid that stained his lips a dark violet.

“Oh, good. I was starting to wonder if your body wouldn’t reject that.” Petra claimed above us. A low growl suddenly filled the room and I looked toward Jean. But his worried eyes and expression of pure distress could not of made that sound. It was me. I was growling. As Armin shivered in my grasp, all the rage was starting to take it’s toll. This was it. Petra had broken Armin. His breaking point continuum had reached it’s max and it was now slowly killing him. This was what they wanted, Armin to break. If she were to go turn my best friend into a science experiment, then I would do the same to her. I’ve always wanted to test how powerful my elemental attacks were on it’s own. She may have known Armin’s limits. But one thing I knew she hadn’t accounted for, was my own. No one hurts the ones person I care about and gets away with it.

 

\---

 

**Isabel: “I’m sorry Farlan, I had no idea. He must have overheard me talking to you.”**

_Farlan: “It’s fine, how much do you think he knows?”_

**Isabel: “If he knows Carla then he knows enough. It wouldn’t of taken him long to figure out the rest.”**

_Farlan: “When this over we should tell him. We’ll tell Eren as well. Maybe he could take you to go see her. I’m sure Carla misses you.”_

**Isabel: “It’s been so long. I doubt she even remembers me.”**


	38. Her Enigmatic Game

Armin’s hands were cold in my grasp as I let the warm tears clear my face of the grime that had accumulated. His eyes continued to flash from violet to blue as his muscles spasmed slightly with each breath he took. Petra could only snicker at my attempt to wipe the thick violet liquid that poured from his lips.

“Find Marco! Make sure Armin’s safe!” I growled, not bothering to turn back to look at Jean. Despite his best efforts, soft noises still managed to escape Armin’s lips of his anguish. We needed to get him out of here. I knew Petra wouldn’t just let us leave. I also knew it was selfish and naive to think I could take down Petra on my own unarmed, but I had to try.

It took a while for Jean to establish what I had said and I had to repeat myself louder to snap him out of his trance. Jean sprinted over and hoisted Armin up in his grasp bridal style.

“Eren… please…” I heard Armin breathe out behind me. Violet tears were streaming down his bloodshot bleeding eyes. “R-Run…” I swallowed in a weep and breathed out slowly while kissing the tips of his chilled fingers.

“I’m sorry Armin…” I nodded to Jean as Armin continued to cry out ‘no’. Over. And Over. I pushed his pleas aside, knowing that he would be safe in Jean’s hands. It was just me, Petra, and the gaping never ending hole beside us.

Using her tail, she gripped the white lab coat from off her shoulders and threw it down the abyssal hole. I watched in the corner of my eye as the sheet floated down into the darkness, careful not to take my eyes off the smirking feline in front of me.

“Well isn’t this sweet. It must be something out of a fairytale.” She began. I knew exactly what she was doing and I wasn’t going to bite into it anymore. Her words were nothing to me. I channeled balls of pixeled flame into my palms and held them there steady as I continued to stare Petra down. I was hoping to intimidate her, but in her eyes, all I saw was accomplishment.

“I’m so glad that bitch fell for it-” I striked my palms forward, launching the two balls of fire toward her at lightning speed. The blue-black flames burst out into a large smoke ring as it made contact with her. I almost let my guard down at that moment. Almost. No more than two seconds past before the flames disappeared and Petra remained unharmed. She just stood there, her shoulders rising up and down rapidly with a covered smile and manic laughter.

If her plan was to make me angry, she was doing a bloody good job at it. Armin’s cries had vanished which I hoped was because Jean had gotten him far enough away from here. I only hoped he was safe.

“Awwww, reminiscing about your sweet little angel again are we?” Petra antagonised. I wasted no more time. One after the other I sent pixeled flame orb after orb towards her, but she was too fast. Whether it was the satisfaction that she was winning or the fact that I was struggling, that was allowing her to travel at this speed I didn’t know. But she was a lot faster than I had ever witnessed. I attempted to nullify or at least slow down her agility with a burst of air toward her, channeling the purest of thoughts that I could. The pixels floated amongst the strong gust that was released towards her but she continued to remain unphased. Leaping from wall to wall, she buzzed around me like a fly unable to be swatted down.

Why? Why was nothing working? Desperation began to drag me down into darkness like I was the coat that was forever falling down that never ending gaping hole. I tried every element possible, anything to give me the edge. Waves of static tides, burst of pixels raising the earth beneath her, cyber flames, gusts of blue-black wind. Nothing. Nothing was affecting her.

“Give up yet?” She asked plainly as I collapsed to one knee in exhaustion.

“It’s called ‘No Harm Done’. One of the special abilities given to hosts. It stops the effect of any titan attack either of us do to each other if one of us don’t have the intention of causing harm. You have them as well. Thanks to that dumbass Annie.” My head perked up at the name.

“Ahh now I’ve got your attention. Look if you don’t believe me, I’ll prove it.” With a click of her fingers, I was surrounded by a five foot ring of searing orange flames. I was also submerged in it. I was covered in a suit of Petra’s flickering fire. Fear would’ve hit me, but I felt nothing, no pain, no heat, no anything. Nothing to the orange flames that licked my palms.

“See? I don’t want to hurt you Eren. I want you to join me.” By this point I had forgotten how to stand. What on Earth was she talking about? She was just torturing my best friend. The one person on this god forsaken planet I actually care about! And now she’s talking about how she doesn’t want to hurt me? That she wants me to join her? That she’s a host? A host of what, Satan’s masachist society?

“Look I know you’re confused, but aren’t you sick of it all? Sick of the selfishness and materialism of society?” My jaw dropped. Petra was showing emotion wrapped in her flames. For once, her evil grin had faded. She reflected pain and solitude, qualities I would never link with her. Her gaze had fell and a single pointed tooth poked out from her frown

“You and I, we are gifted. We were chosen by this earth to right the wrongs of humanity. We are hosts. Join me and we can create a new, pure world, dominated by Titans.” Among the flickering orange and yellow around her, a hand extended out towards me. Instantly I slapped it away, finding once again mobility in my bottom half.

“As if I would ever side with you. You are insane. If you honestly are so deluded that you believe you’re special enough to ‘change’ this world-” In a split second the flames had vanished. I heard a small gurgle in front of me and saw an arrow piercing the strawberry blondes throat. Her ears were drooped and her eyes wide as she tore the arrow out with a spurt of red that instantly healed. A large dark silhouette of wings suddenly grew over us.

Relief and determination flooded me as a pair of black wings dropped down, sending Petra flying back against the wall of the warehouse with a loud slam.

“Rivaille!” I found myself crying out. He snickered and turned around to face me. “I wasn’t the one who shot her…” He stated pointing behind me. Tears of gratefulness almost spilled as I peered up at all the familiar faces. Connie’s idiot smirk, Sasha’s determined glint in her eyes, Ymir and Hanji holding their bo staffs in their grasp, Farlan standing grand, Isabel twirling her kusarigama and Krista with an unloaded bow who I knew was the owner of that arrow. They were all here and all alive.

“Ymir, hand him his BA!” Rivaille called out. She nodded and came speeding down in a flash, passing me the familiar tablet. She tapped her finger on the top corner, bringing up a function I had never seen before. The tablet suddenly brought up a holographic image of an eye mask.

“You’re going to need some shoes, you ain’t gonna use that blade with that get up.” Looking down I suddenly felt very unsafe in the rags that clung to my body. Anyone would've thought I just came out of the underground homeless district. Although I didn’t quite understand what Ymir meant, I swiped my hand over the mask holograph. A slight tickle swept over my body as I was smothered in a sudden blue light. Once it dimmed down, I felt a new weight on my shoulders. I recognised instantly what I was wearing. It was the same dark black clothing as the Shadowstrike. Long leather fingerless gloves with the sleeveless tight fitting hood. And more relieving than anything, closed in combat boots. It somehow made me feel empowered. Knowing that as soon as I swiped my hands over my BA, I would become as strong as he was. As Armin was. Is.

“You’re naive…” A soft woman’s voice coughed from across the room, “if you really think… I came alone…” She didn’t bother to come to a stand. She kneeled on all fours, a fiery twinkle in her eyes.

“Krista! Don’t let her roar!” Isabel suddenly yelled out. Almost dropping her bow from shock, she lifted her wings from the metal floor. Drawing the string back, she shot the feather tipped arrow toward her. But she was still fast. Rolling out of the way was all that was needed for her to be able to bellow out a terrifying deep roar. The ringing headache that formed caused not only myself to collapse to the ground with a hanging head in their hands.

It felt as though it went on for ages. By the time I finally opened my eyes, the warehouse was flooded with reinforcements crashing through the shattered windows. We were outnumbered, but barely. I suddenly had two coming at me, one at my left and one at my right. I swiped over my BA to bring out my katana. The familiar weight in my hands brought immense comfort. As I readied for battle, Isabel and Connie ran up to my sides, both with their desired weapons in their hands.

“Don’t worry Jaeger we got you covered.” Connie announced with a one-sided grin as he aimed his throwing knives.

“You go get that hotheaded ginger!” Isabel added as she swung her kusarigama like a lasso toward the enemies blocking our path. The clashing of weapon against weapon and the grunts of our enemies falling only filled me with more determination.

I coated my katana in my unique elemental flame whilst once again staring the woman down. Fear could now clearly be seen by the stiffness of her tail and trembling limbs. Good. I ran at full speed towards her, making sure to cut down any enemy titan that lay in my path. Her eyes met mine with a new glow. They weren't violet but yellow. Her ears and fur had become somewhat more feral-like as she stood slowly on her hind two feet. She uttered a phrase that was inaudible over the chaos behind. I was only a few metres away from her when a soaring pillar of flames blocked my path. Columns of orange flickering fire began to pop up from the ground all around us. I stumbled back in fear of getting burnt but then remembered what she had said earlier. I slowly put a hand in the flame. Even now as the fire danced at my finger, there was still no burning sensation.

When I finally realised that this was just a ploy to distract me, Petra had vanished from the wall of the warehouse, instead I stared up to see her leaping from fire pillar to fire pillar away from me. With each leap she was ascending higher and higher. Until I realised she was going after Krista. As fast as I could I swung my katana towards her pillars, hoping my pixel-flames would somewhat imbalance her pillars. I chased after my flames and to my relief, Petra lost her balance as my blue flames hit hers and she fell right into my attack. Now we were equal.

She growled in aggravation as we dueled, her claws acting as her blades. With each swing of my sword, she counter-attacked with her paws and tail. Though she was fast in evading long distance, it seemed close up she wasn’t so much. It was evident that she was not an experienced fighter. It didn’t take long before I figured out how to get an opening. Catching her tail with one hand, I sweeped her legs from under her letting her sternum land square on my knee before swinging her up onto the top level of the warehouse. Using my titan abilities, I leapt up and watched as she sputtered out red on her velvet ginger paws. Now she was the weak one. Laying on the floor at my feet, wiping the blood from her own lips.

“You-” She started, coughing up another heap of blood. As I looked around the warehouse, I knew we had an easy win here. It wouldn’t be long before I could find Armin and finally get out of this place.

“You will regret… NOT JOINING US!” She screamed as two deviants came up behind her pinning me down to the ground, whacking the back of my skull onto the hard iron with a loud echoing clang. One had my waist pinned as the other pushed my neck down with both hands. Both had masks over their mouths, their eyes ruthless. I tried to roll out of their hold but they were too strong.

I dug my nails into their gloved palms, but it was useless. As I felt my breath slowly slipping away, the weight had suddenly lifted from my hips. Immediately, I twisted. The man holding my neck stumbled back and I made sure to give him a good turning kick to the temple while I knew he was down. I doubled-over trying to get my own breath back.

“Are you okay! You’re not too hurt are you!” My saviour questioned with a hand on my shoulder. The voice was unmissable. I was shocked yet mortified at the same time. His worried blue eyes stared back at me.

“Armin! What are you doing here!?” Dirt and blood still stained his body, but his clothes had now mended matching mine. His bruises and cuts also healed.

“We couldn’t let you have all the fun.” Jean chimed in from behind, Marco tailing behind them looking exhausted. I shook my head in disbelief, stuttering that he couldn’t have possibly been fully healed.

“It’s fine Eren, I can fight. Marco is our master healer after all.” Armin reassured calmly, walking over to a completely staggered, bruised up Petra. I regained my composure and followed Armin’s lead as Petra crawled on her hands and feet backwards until she hit the edge of the railing that hung over the gaping never-ending hole.

“It’s over Petra…” Armin announced. The battle was coming to an end around us. Titan smoke filled the warehouse arena as our enemies fell one after the other.

“We’ve won, give up the notebook now and we’ll let you live.” My eyes widened and stared directly at how assertive Armin had become. His eyes squinted and brows furrowed as if he was an eagle staring down at his prey with a scowl. If I was Petra I would've been terrified. Although I still had no idea what lay in that notebook, I knew it had to be important. I kept my ground, standing right next to Armin, making sure she knew that we together had beaten her.

Her worried eyes suddenly fell into a grin, her quivering ceasing. What sort of game was she playing this time? It had to be a bluff, she’d done this before. I wouldn’t let her trickery phase me. Unless… it wasn’t a bluff.

“Are you sure you’ve won?” She simply laughed, raising her chin behind us. Armin turned first, ever so slightly peering behind him, his shoulders drooping as well as his demeanour when he had realised what it was. I turned as well to see a large man in a long dark cloak, shielding his face in the shadow of his hood. He seemed unarmed yet felt so threatening. I couldn’t help but feel as though I had met him before.

A pair of dark wings suddenly sprung up in front of us. Rivaille apparated his scythe straight into his arms.

“It’s you isn’t it? You’re the doctor!” Rivaille interrogated through his teeth. The man in the cloak nodded slowly.

“Gunther! Erd! Don’t let them touch him!” Petra shouted pleasingly behind us as she leapt over us and behind the cloaked man. Rivaille yelled and charged straight toward the cloaked man as the two deviants that tried to choke me before stood guard in front of the unmoving man. Before I even knew what was happening Armin had tears staining his cheeks and white knuckles from gripping his knuckles. He ran straight for the man in the coak. It was him. After all this time, the man who did this to Armin was standing before us. The doctor.

“YOU BASTARD!” He bellowed as he maneuvered around Gunther, Erd and Rivaille heading straight for the cloaked doctor. I called out to Armin to stop as I quickly regripped my katana and ran after him. Our boots knocked against the metal flooring with each heavy step and leap we took.

“I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU FOR WHAT YOU DID TO US!” Armin screamed at the cloaked man. Armin brought both his swords above his head as he attempted to do an overhead slash down his chest. The cloaked man still had not moved, until Armin was only a foot away in which he turned his back and delivered his boots straight into Armin’s chest, sending him flying back into me. We both collided into the ground with a massive crash.

“Now, is that anyway to talk to your superiors.” The cloaked man finally spoke. Armin became stiff. He too had recognised that voice. Though I wasn’t sure from where, it was evident that he did. He rose slowly off me, dropping his katanas as his mouth dropped and more tears spilled onto his blood stained cheeks. I remained on the ground in a stunned silence. I watched as Armin and the doctor’s gazes interlocked with each other.

“I- It’s not- It can’t… you… you wer-” Armin stuttered in shaky breaths as he stepped slowly towards the cloaked man. Rivaille and Jean both called out to him but it was if he had lost hearing to everyone except himself and the doctor. The man’s bulky arms slowly moved up towards his hood, lifting off his head at a harrowing speed. His fingertips brushed the tip of the black cloth until he flicked it up onto his neck. I finally understood Armin’s reaction. He collapsed to his knees, holding his palms over his mouth. He was shaking uncontrollably as his lip trembled the tormenting word,

“Dad?”

 

\---

 

**Isabel: “This is bad.”**

_Farlan: “Issy, we are not going to save him unless we-”_

**Isabel: “I know, I understand.”**

_Farlan: “Have you decided who it will be?”_

**Isabel: “I have, I think he will take it on quite well, you?”**

_Farlan: “I have since the day I met him. I’m sorry you won’t get to see her.”_

**Isabel: “It’s okay. I just wish I could’ve told Eren the truth...”**


	39. Forever Running

I didn’t remember much of Armin’s dad as a kid. He was always busy with work, and after his wife’s death he barely acknowledged his son at all. About a week after he moved in with us from Kyojin, his mother had left early for work with mine. His dad, or Mr. Smith as I would always call him, was forced to stay home to look after us. I always treasured this day. Remembering the subtle sparkle of the dew drops on the early morning grass. The sweet song of the unknown birds hidden in their own secret world amongst the trees. The biting chill of the wind that raced through my hair as I sat on the porch picking at the fluffy puffs of dandelions that grew past my knees. I remembered this day so well, as it was the day I first saw Armin smile.

Erwin or Mr. Smith was playing with his son in the backyard, showing him all the wonders of what a single patch of grass could hold. This amazed Armin at the time, as Kyojin was a very industrial and urban based country, compared to our rural country-like nation. Erwin would point at a vibrant green grasshopper that leapt onto his pants and he would tell him not to move. _This is one of the earth’s creations_ he said _we mustn't harm it._ Armin would stare beady eyed at the six-legged insect on his father and then it would jump away. Armin held sight of it and chased after it. That’s when his lips curled. He laughed as he chased after the little insect in the grass and his father would chase after him. Once Erwin would catch his son he would throw him up in the air while also laughing, tickling away and giving light pecks at his neck as he continued to hold him tightly. Everyday they did this. Armin would run after yet another insect or bird and Erwin would chase after him, embracing him in tickles and hugs as they giggled to their hearts content.

Without my father in my life, this is what I always assumed it would of been like. Continuous laughter and tickles followed by hugs and kisses and as years would go by, the father-son bond would only strengthen and grow. Erwin and Armin’s did for some time. Until a couple of weeks before Armin’s mother’s death. When our mothers would go to work, Erwin would still take Armin outside and I would still follow by sitting on the porch, only now Armin would be pointing out the fluttering butterflies and whirling dandelion heads as his father remained lying in the grass, playing with the dead strands that had fallen over the winter. Armin would again run after another insect. Another bird. And with each passing day, it took Erwin longer and longer to actually catch up with him. To find the effort to stand up and go after his son. Until one day, he didn’t move at all. He just laid there. In the grass. As Armin waited at the edge of the backyard for his dad to catch him again.

I didn’t realise, that as the doctor placed a hand on Armin’s shivering head, wiping away the violet tears that had previously fallen from his eyes, that this was how far he had to run for Erwin to finally catch him. He had to live through the trauma of losing a mother, a father, being bullied, kidnapped, becoming a stripper, becoming a science experiment, losing his sanity here and there, being on the brink of death more than anyone should be and now realise that his father was the one that caused him to be a titan. This was the cost for Armin to finally have his father touch him again.

As soon as the doctor removed his hood to reveal Dr. Erwin Smith, my mind had immediately tapped into Armin’s. Flashbacks of his time of being turned into a Titan came back, only the man in the black hood had a face. The doctor had a face, and a name. And it was the last one that Armin deserved to hear. As I peered around the warehouse, it wasn’t only Armin that was in shock. Rivaille, Isabel, Connie, Jean, Krista, everybody. They were all had the same wide-eyed, deer in the headlights expression. They all knew. Seeing Erwin’s face made them remember. Remember the pain of being turned into a titan and who did it to them.

“YOU SON OF A BITCH!” Rivaille bellowed behind us, scythe in his grasp and a devilish glint in his eyes. Petra’s two henchman I came to know as Gunther and Erd immediately were holding Rivaille’s arms behind him as his wings tensed. The sudden uproar had somehow brought strength to the enemy we were so close to defeating. The groans and grunts of my comrades below me, shook me out of my state of shock. We were still in a war zone.

“I TRUSTED YOU!” Rivaille continued to scream as he struggled against the two Titans holding him. Erwin’s gloved hand lifted from Armin’s as he walked slowly towards the restrained Rivaille.

“That was your own fault, Levi.” He spoke in a deep tone.

“MY NAME ISN’T LEVI!” He screeched, letting his banshee-like Titan call ring out as he did. This finally snapped Armin out of his trance. I took the opportunity to go up to him and help him to his feet. Even as he leant all his weight against me, I could still feel the shock flowing through his blood, the clouded glaze over his eyes.

 _Armin, you need to snap out of it._ I spoke in my mind hoping he would register it. _This is not the time. We can talk about this when we get back, right now you need to focus. We need you._ Armin slowly turned his head to me, swallowing hard and nodding. After blinking a couple of times, he regained his footing but still held on to my hood tightly.

Erwin’s laugh echoed throughout the wall’s, putting an anvil into my heart. My morality could not drop faster. I could feel Marco trying to help, but I knew even if I didn’t look behind me and notice him leaning up against the wall with Jean holding him up, that he was in no position to be using his power.

A loud thud and a heart-wrenching groan made me turn instantly again to the Doctor, who had a steel-capped boot in Levi’s stomach. He doubled-over like a dying flower, his arm’s still restrained behind him. His wings did little to help.

Armin’s hand left my hood as he took one step closer to his father. Then another. And another.

“Why?” Was all he could breath out. Erwin’s laugh stopped but grin remained as he tilted his head toward his son. Rivaille’s head also forced it’s way towards Armin as Gunther and Erd continued to kick him on the ground.

“What was that?”

“Why? Why would you do this to us?”

“Armin? I thought you’d be grateful!” He announced as he moved quickly towards Armin to put an arm around his head. Armin hissed and pulled back, knocking the larger man’s arm out of the way. His stare never left his eyes.

“Why did I do it? To make you stronger. Your mother died because she was weak. Now you can never be taken from me the way she was from us.” I could hear Armin’s pulse race even as I stood a few paces away from him. I wanted nothing more than to pull this man away from Armin, but I knew he had to know. All I could stand behind and wait.

“At what price does your definition of strength come to?”

“My definition?”

“Don’t listen to him Armin… ugh- he’s a bloody idiot- tch.” Erwin clicked his fingers behind him, signalling Gunther and Erd to press their boots into Rivaille’s back as they pulled at his wings. Tiny high-pitched titan screeches emitted from Rivaille’s lips as they did, making that anvil in my heart sink further and further into my blood.

“Doesn’t it feel great Armin? Knowing nothing will take you away from me?”  
“No! It doesn’t! You can’t just forcefully take these people away from their families, torture them against their will-”

“For the good of scie-”

“Fuck off! I don’t care how smart you think you are. Humans are not yours to play around with. You can’t-”

“Don’t be so selfish son. I did this for you…” Armin shook his head, picking up his blades as he did.

“No, you don’t get to call me that. You are no longer my father. You died those many years ago. They reported you missing because they couldn’t find a body. As far as I know…” He lifted one of his blades, pointing it towards the doctor. “You’re dead to me.” Erwin crossed his arms and tsked thrice as he bowed his head.

“Now, now Armin. Is that anyway…” Erwin’s arm disappeared into his cloak. Instincts rushed in faster than my thoughts. “TO SPEAK TO YOU’RE FATHER!” With no time to spare, I sped towards Armin and pushed him out of the way as Erwin fired a bright neon bullet towards Armin. If I had not acted, it would of pierced straight through his forehead.

Armin’s breathing was ragged, shoulders heaving up and down.

“Come on now Eren.” I wrapped Armin’s head into my chest and stared daggers into the taller man.

“You know those bullets are a pain in my backside to reload. I can only keep two in the magazine at a time.” Realisation shot me.

“Oh, that’s right, that means I have another one.” I hoisted Armin again, speeding down off the top level of the warehouse. A searing, scorch-like pain heaved through my thigh. My leg muscles cramped agonizingly as I attempted to contain the cries of pain. The bullet had only grazed my leg. Armin realised straight away what it was, cursing under his breath.

“I’m fine Ar, it’s just a scratch.” Armin shook his head looking up towards the doctor with his blades firmly in his grasp. I looked up too, only to see Rivaille finally becoming free of the restricting Titans, heading straight towards Erwin. With Rivaille’s wing power he was fast but not fast enough. Erwin immediately slipped out of the way. Rivaille attempted to cloud him in a dark shadowy mist using his abilities, but like when I tried to attack Petra he was unphased.

Once the black haze had vanished, Erwin had somehow appeared on the same floor of the warehouse as us, now with a hostage in his grasp. Rivaille recognised who it was. He stopped. He gripped tightly onto his scythe whilst hovering in the air, staring down as Erwin held a fully loaded pistol to Farlan’s temple. The pistols with titan poison bullets.

“You’ve grown weak Levi. Do you love him? Is he your _Family_?” He said the last part with such maliciousness and vile, that it made the bullet’s seem like a sugary sweet. Rivaille’s eyes remained locked onto Farlan’s as he slowly lowered himself down. No. We couldn’t give up. Not yet. As if sensing my intentions Armin channeled a small orb of fire behind him.

“Don’t even think about it.” I heard Jean whisper harshly behind Armin’s ear.

“It will only make things worse you know that.” Armin nodded and flicked his wrist to retract the flame. Marco stumbled above me, placing his hand firmly on my thigh whilst chanting his healing incantation. He was sweating uncontrollably and his eyelids repetitively began to force themselves closed. Like always, the searing sensation was replaced with a split second sting and then gone.

I thanked Marco and told him to regain his strength as I pushed myself up, regaining my blade and running over to Armin.

“Drop your weapon Levi…” Rivaille’s grip waivered on his scythe. His teeth were clenched and if my eyes weren’t deceiving me I swear I could’ve seen… were they… tears?

“DON’T LISTEN TO HIM BIG BROTHER!” Isabel screamed as she ran up beside him. Rivaille’s eyes shot open. Farlan nodded towards Isabel who then returned it. Rivaille noticed the exchange as well, gripping his scythe firm again. _Do you think they have a plan?_ I mentally asked Armin. He shrugged. _I sure hope so_.

“I think little girls should learn to leave the big kids ALONE!” Isabel’s kusarigama was suddenly stranded at Rivaille’s feet as she was suddenly restrained by Petra. We had to do something. Standing here watching Rivaille suffer with his morality and his family was not going to help anyone. I looked back towards Jean who was caressing Marco’s pale face softly. Their free hands were linked by their sides.

“You need to get out of here.While there’s still a chaos surrounding us and the doctor distracted.”

“No, I can’t- I can’t leave- I”  
“Marco. Listen to me. Go back to Utgard. Get your strength back. Tell them where we are and our status. They can come and help.” Jean lowered his forehead onto Marco’s kissing it softly.

“I promised you remember, we will meet up after this all over, okay?” Marco nodded, connecting his lips to Jean one last time before Jean put an invisibility shield on him and watched as he slinked out of the warehouse.

Jean too was by Armin’s side as Isabel had struggled non-stop despite the ginger tail that choked around her neck.

“Levi, I’m only tell you this once more. Drop. Your. Weapon.” Isabel continued to scream and shout to Rivaille for him not to do it, but Petra’s paws were quickly over her mouth.

“ISABEL!” Rivaille yelled.

“The scythe, Levi!” Erwin instigated. Rivaille’s fingers began to part, but before they could fully be released, a gust of wind suddenly shot through the air, straight towards Petra who collapsed to the ground with her paws holding her ears down. Isabel straight away leapt onto all fours towards Rivaille who embraced her in a close hug. Erwin too was shocked, letting go of Farlan who came towards the two.

A girl suddenly appeared next to us with a dark hood and an extended hand. Jean, Armin and I all turned simultaneously toward her trying to make out a face.

“You may not be able to hurt Eren, but I know you never gave a shit about me…” The girl removed her hood, revealing a blonde messy bun and a determined scowl.

“ANNIE!” Armin yelled in ecstasy. Annie turned towards the three of us slowly.

“Take this as an apology.” Was all she said before she ran straight towards Petra with her nunchakus in hand.

Armin put a hand on both Jean’s and my shoulder, giving us both a nod before he rushed into the war zone. _Eren! Erwin is mine, you go for Petra and I’ve asked Jean to go for her two dogs!_ I responded with a nod and went chasing after the bitch coated in orange fur. Annie was on top of her in a second. Unlike me, everything she did was weakening her. Maybe that jibberish Petra was talking about was true. Wanting me to join them. That we’re _hosts_. I had no idea what it meant, but this proved some form of truth. Soon Petra was drowning in Annie’s water attack. Her focus deviant abilities were truly amazing. Despite her trying to kill me, I couldn’t just ignore her talent. I striked at her chest as soon as she was vulnerable. Although she blocked, it was very weak. She whipped me back slightly with her tail, extending a paw out to Annie, sending her flying back in a pillar of flames.

“I’m so sick of you, you disobedient brat!” She yelled as Annie screamed in pain not only from the burning of the fire but from the heavy collision she had made with the wall and then the ground. Annie’s abilities on her immediately wore off. And now, Petra was pissed. _Shit._

I held my blade out in front of me as she stepped closer and closer to me. I stepped back in sync with her, trying to work out a course of action. A twinkle of white caught the corner of my eye. Unaware to Petra, Krista had a blue-tipped arrow drawn back, aiming directly for her. But the hovering titan wasn’t the only thing she wasn’t aware of.

“KRISTA! BEHIND YOU!” I found myself screaming. Petra stood on alert, looking straight behind to see another winged titan with a sword coated in neon-blue going straight through Krista’s chest. Krista’s banshee cry shattered what was left of the windows. Ymir was screaming for her straight away, her steaming body falling into her arms.

“Whoops. Thanks Oluo.” He nodded diligently. “Now where was I… oh yes.” In my state of disarray and disbelief, her paw made head on contact with my throat. I dropped my sword and fell to the ground at Petra’s feet. The ringing sound of Krista’s fatal cry lingered at my ear. Petra’s claws dug into my scalp as she hoisted me to my feet, tying my arms to my body with her tail and placing her arm under my chin.

“I’ve assumed you’ve seen someone losing a Titan bound partner before? Let’s watch and see.” I struggled against Petra’s thickened claws as she forced my head towards where Krista’s hand slowly dropped from Ymir’s cheek down to the ground in a burst of steam. As soon as her soft fingers hit the ground, it was as though a sonic wave emitted from the brunette holding her. She clenched her fists to her chests, letting out a horrific blood-curdling scream. She fell to the ground curling into herself as she fitted in pain. This went on for what seemed like forever until she suddenly stopped and rose gently.

“Damn, I didn’t think she would cave that quickly. I guess she really didn’t have much else.” I wanted to rip that grin off of Petra’s soulless face but my eyes were glued to Ymir. She had black fluid streaming down her eyes, fangs protruding from her lips. I’d seen this transformation before. The matted hair, the long claw-like nails, it was what Armin had become.

“KILL ME! I DON’T WANT TO HURT THEM!” Her demonic echoing voice and violet glowing eyes only made my assumptions more correct. It was horrifying, she was truly berserk. I had to get out of this grasp. I couldn’t watch this.

“EREN!” _Stop._

“KILL ME!” _No._

“IT HURTS TOO MUCH!” _Please. Stop. I can’t._ The force from my head shifted as Petra released me with a wicked laugh, grabbing my dropped katana and throwing it towards Oluo, who drove it straight through Ymir’s throat. She fell. Right next to a half-evaporated Krista whilst she muttered _thank you._ The anvil had sunk so deep now that it had become a part of me. It was flowing through my blood. A weight. A burden. It was so heavy I couldn’t move. I grabbed aimlessly at my chest, trying to pull off the clenching force on my heart. I had no blade. I had no form of attacking Petra.

Armin’s grunts of force caught my attention. Both he and Rivaille were versing Erwin by themselves. Though Erwin had no weapon, I had noticed massive metal guards over his gloves and up his arms with which he was using to block both of their strikes. He was incredibly fast. I went to run up to help them. But Isabel and Farlan both stood in front of me with their weapons in hand.

“What are you doing! They need help!” I cried.

“We know, and this is the only way we can.” Isabel said in an unusually solemn tone. They both held their weapon’s in front of their faces. I understood straight away what they were doing but I had no idea how they could do it. I always assumed Hanji only taught me. But Isabel had imbued her kusarigama with coloured texture just as I did with mine. Farlan did the same, his sword and shield coated in a dark blue aura whilst Isabel’s had a leafy green texture.

“H- How did you-?” Isabel hushed me with a finger, handing me a brown, rope bracelet with the Zodiac symbol for Cancer and Aries hanging as two charms.

“Give this to Carla.” I stared in confusion at the gift, then at her. Tears were streaming down her vibrant green eyes as she forced a pained smile at me. Her arms wrapped around me tightly, I hugged her back, feeling her need for intimacy. As she pulled away, she kissed my cheek.

“I’m sorry we couldn’t spend more time together. Tell your mother that I’m sorry too.” Her paw left my arm leaving a chill patch as I watched both their eyes turn into a glow of the colour of their imbued blades. But it was controlled, not demon-like. I called after Isabel as she and Farlan ran straight for Erwin who had Rivaille and Armin, so close to the edge of the top floor that hung over the gaping hole.

Armin had been flown back hard by Erwin’s kick. He was still recovering as Rivaille became disarmed of his scythe that fell down the abyssal hole beneath him. The taller man brought an uppercut to his chin, sending him on his hands and knees. Isabel and Farlan came charging toward Erwin but stopped simultaneously as Petra slammed in front of them. I could only see Petra’s trademark grin as she retracted her paws. Her claws were thick with dripping blood. Isabel and Farlan had become rag dolls. Rag dolls with a hole in their chest.

“NOOOOOOO!” Rivaille bellowed as he clutched his chest. Petra kicked both of their limp bodies down the gaping hole. There was no thump. Not a sound of their fall And then it happened again. The sonic wave. His titan call as both of his blood bound partners, two-thirds of his souls, are lost. I couldn’t take a single step and it wouldn’t of mattered. Petra had already grasped me again, this time with Isabel and Farlan’s blood staining my face. He had both his hands clutched to his chest as he continued to bellow his cry. She made me watch as Erwin placed a hand on both of his wings, pulling them off. Entrails followed as the beautiful soft masses were washed in a sea of blood at Armin’s feet behind him. Rivaille’s scream stopped. I heard nothing. His mouth remained open as Erwin grasped his neck from behind.

“If you love your family so much, why don’t you join them.” With that, the third rag doll was sent down the abyssal hole in front of my eyes. And then he turned to Armin. No. No. _ARMIN RUN!_ But he couldn’t hear me. He was frozen in place, staring wide-eyed at Rivaille’s disconnected feathers float across the warehouse like snow.

Erwin continued to get closer. And closer.

“Do you think you’ll make it Jaeger?” Petra taunted in my ear as she held me tighter and tighter.

“Even if I let you go now, will you be able to save him?” I clawed, bit, punched, shoved, but she wouldn’t let go.

“ARMIN!” Erwin’s grimy hands were now around Armin’s neck. Armin snapped out of it and clawed and kicked at his grasp. Erwin was making his way back to the edge.

“Three… two… one…” Petra whispered as she let me go. I ran as fast as I could. My legs had become numb from fear and adrenalin. Armin’s face was covered in tears and blood. He opened his eyes and looked past his captor to me. _I’m sorry, Eren..._

“ARMIN! NO!” I screamed.

“Say hi to your mother for me... Son.” Was the last thing Erwin said as he released his fingers ever so slowly from the his neck.

“ARRRRRRMIIIIIIN!” Our fingertips barely touched as he grew smaller and smaller. My eyes did not leave that spot. For whatever reason I thought that if I looked away, he may somehow reach out and I wouldn’t be able to grab him and pull him up. But then I remembered something. I desperately searched for Jean, hoping that there was some slim chance of hope. That maybe he could of survived this. That this was all just a dream. Once I found him, he had wide eyes and was staring at the abyssal hole. And then he fell to his knees. Clutching his hands to his chest in agony with a heart-wrenching cry. The sonic wave flew through the air. This time, I heard the thud of his fall.

 

\---

 

_Unknown Female: “I’m sorry I had to choose you, but there’s no one else I can trust with this.”_

**Unknown Male: “What are you talking about?”**

_Unknown Female: “You’ll know in time. Don’t worry I’ll be with you every step of the way. I can endure as long as I have to for you to be able to release.”_

**Unknown Male: “Release? What do you- Whe- Where am I?”**

_Unknown Female: “Calm down. Everything will be okay. You need to do this. For his sake.”_   


	40. The Divine Aura

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys... Sorry this is so late. I know some people may have thought that I had dropped this, but on the contrary. I've actually been in the middle of finalizing the actual story for my original webcomic that I will eventually be doing with this story with my own characters... Pile that on top of my final years of high school along with other stresses and you get a long waiting period for the next update. But I can assure you. I'm not going anywhere and I still plan on doing the sequel to this :D. Thankyou for sticking around if you are still reading this and it means a lot that you guys are supporting me! I love you all xxxx 
> 
> ENJOY!

What drove people to do horrible things? Betrayal? Envy? Greed? Lies? Death? In a sense, every crime that has ever been committed could be justified by stating that it was just human nature. Their humanity drove them to act in those ways. But what happens when you are no longer a human? When you're a monster hiding in a human body? Where the lives of everyone around you are insignificant? How is that justified?

As I peered down into the never ending darkness, down towards the last place I witnessed the one person I dared to say that I truly loved, the answer was clear. There was no justification. Whether they shared the same blood or shedded each others, this act could never be justified by humanity. Why? Why does this anvil have to flow through my blood? Why did Annie have to betray us? Why did Ymir and Krista have to die? Why did Isabel and Farlan have to sacrifice themselves? Why did Rivaille have to follow their fate? Why did Armin have to be turned into a Titan in the first place? If I had the luxury of believing in fate and destiny at that point I would of concluded to that. But I couldn't believe anything at this point.

Jean's demonic screaming echoed off the walls. His blades had scattered across the warehouse floor where the rest of my friends stood. Tied down. Captured. At least the one's that remained. Hanji... Connie... Sasha... Jean writhing in agony. We were all that was left of our party.

"Are you going to get up and face me like a man or what Jaeger?" Erwin's voice resonated behind me. My eyes slowly lifted. A stinging ache flooded every muscle in my body. I pushed off my knee and stood over the gaping hole, never taking my eyes off that one spot. Jean's cries suddenly ceased. I quickly peered over to see Petra had made her way over to him, her slick tail wrapping around the shivering man's jaw. Her cackling sneer was too much for me.

I found myself in a daze. His soft blonde hair and oceanic blue eyes filling my mind.

\---

_"Hey Eren!"_

_"What is it Armin?" He pulled out a large leather bound book out of his bag, clearing the leaves of the dirt ground where we sat._

_"Look! I found this at the library. It's an encyclopedia of all the famous Martial Artists around the world. It has everything! How they performed their art. The places they practised. Even spiritual meditation sites." Armin's eyes lit up behind his glasses as he pointed to picture of General Choi Hong Hi._

_"You're such a nerd, you know there is no one better than Bruce Lee. Everyone else is so fruitless."_

_"And you are so naive! That's like saying that Superman is better than Batman just because he's invincible."_

_"That has nothing to do with this, and yes, that does make him the best superhero. He can't be stopped, he will always win. He always sacrifices himself for the good of the people he saves."_

_"Haha Eren, you just contradicted yourself."_

_"Contra- what now?"_

_"What you said doesn't make sense, Superman can't sacrifice himself because he is pretty much invincible, there is nothing to sacrifice. Batman is all flesh and bone. He knows he could go out one day and never come back. He is all human and all courage. Just like Bruce Lee was, but he also had others to help him and he he helped others."_

_I shrugged, "I guess you're right..." Armin closed the book and placed a gentle hand on my shoulder._

_"I'll never forget our promise, Eren!"_

_"Huh?"_

_"We are going to become the best ninja assassins in the world! Just you wait, we'll surpass any Batman or Bruce Lee and we can travel the world battling monsters."_

_I replied with a cheeky grin and pulled him into a hug._

_"Of course we will!"_

_"Yay! Nothing can stop us now..."_

_\---_

Those last words echoed within my head. Like someone had grabbed a highlighter and told me to memorise just those few words. _We can travel the world battling monsters_. It was so innocent back then. Such a careless dream we had created under our Tree of Truth. Monsters were demonic animalistic beings at that time. They weren't kidnappers, liars, betrayers or even back stabbing fathers.

"Turn around Jaeger. Don't be a coward like your father."

Erwin's words meant nothing. My nails dug into my palms. Sticky warm blood trickled through the cracks in my fingers. We were supposed to start a new life. I made a promise. A promise that I would protect him. A promise that I would save him. A promise that I would turn him back into a human. At what point did these promises begin to fail. Actually... It didn't matter if they did. I promised to bring him home. I was going to bring him home. We were going to start over. Have a new life. Use our martial arts in defense and nothing more.

"EREN! FACE ME AND STOP BEING A COWARD OR ENJOY YOUR FRIENDS FATE!" His voice boomed behind me.

"No." I growled under my breath.

"Excuse me?"

"I. Am not. A coward." Erwin chuckled heavily behind me, his armoured gauntlets clanking. If this world didn't want Armin to be here with me, or even here at all, I wasn't going to accept it. He was too pure, too innocent. He was too kind and caring to endure this much pain and have this fate. They didn't deserve this. None of them deserved this.

 

Ymir...

_C'mon, put some muscle into it..._

Krista...

_Wow! That was amazing you're going to have to teach me how to do that!.._

Farlan...

_Armin was right to trust you..._

Rivaille...

_Don't regret the decisions you make brat..._

Isabel...

_I'm sorry we couldn't spend more time together..._

Armin...

_Please! Run!_

 

No. I wasn't going to run anymore. This cruel world that we fell into wasn;'t going to control me. I promised Armin we would go home. I would never lie again. I would never hide again. I would not be filled with guilt anymore. I would change this world. I would follow Armin's wishes and stop this. I would create a new world where monsters would never reign again.

"C'mon, let's get the rest of these guys loaded up so we can- Shit! You've got to be kidding me right now!" I heard Petra yell down below. Her tail had left Jean's mouth and she was now backing up on all fours. Twinkles of uncertainty lit in her eyes. An odd sensation suddenly burst from my veins. Like the anvil had lifted and now melted into a burning adrenalin. The adrenalin traveled into my fingertips and suddenly blue-pixelated flames emitted from them. It grew quickly. The adrenalin was overflowing, making my head spin. I collapsed onto my knees as my heart began to race. The urge to scream mixed with heavy breathing became too overwhelming. All my muscles clenched and a deep reverberating noise came out of my mouth, a noise I never heard before. Like a malfested hawk. Ribbons of blue and black pixels swirled around me in a massive orb, glowing as they continued to extend further. A smoldering blaze heated at my arm. As if in a uniform shape, it was different from the rest of the sensations that flooded my body. I lifted my left bicep to my face and noticed that a symbol was being branded by the blue ribbons onto my arm. My hawk like screaming continued, uncontrollable and ever painful. Suddenly a large mass of the blue collected onto the branding on my arm. My eyes began to sting just as my arm had been. My screaming became louder. I couldn't take it. I wanted this to be over. Nausea shook me. Within a split second, all of the blue turned to red. As if the pixels had gone into an error. The now blood red mass of ribbons at my arm assimilated in front of me into a large pair of curled horns. This slowly extended into a red spirit-like ram almost thrice the size of me. It ran in mid-air around the whole warehouse, while red ribbons continued to orbit around only me. What is this?

My hawk-like screaming ceased. I no longer had control of my actions. I rose to a stand, the ache of my muscles begging me to slit and alleviate it. I turned and witnessed for the first time, the fear in Erwin's eyes. My hand reached out towards him, red pixels forming into the symbol for Aries like on the bracelet Isabel had given me.

"ERWIN WATCH OUT!" Petra screamed as the red spirit ram ran straight through the levitating symbol in the air where Erwin was just standing. This power. What was it? It was strange. Uncontrollable. But I loved it. I leapt down to where Erwin and Petra landed, squirming back in terror.

"I thought you said Annie took care of it Petra?!"

"You can't stop a host's Aura you dumb ass!" Petra shrieked.

My hands reached up again, this time two symbols popping up and the large ram split into two. Both Petra and Erwin had nowhere to go. Erwin's agonising shout is the only one I heard as a massive cloud of red ribbons rises from the ear-piercing explosion. My ears begun to flutter closed as the deafening ring striked my ears. Ribbons began to fade as I collapsed to the floor, the force knocking what little breath I had out of me. My friends faces were blurred but I could still sense their awe and apprehension. I finally had control over my body but I couldn't bring myself to do anything.

"Erwin! Are you alright!" Petra cried! I couldn't see her but the patter of her feet vibrated into my ears through the floor.

"He's- He's his father's' son alright! Get them in the truck. This stun effect should- should wear off momentarily."

The fatigue finally convinced me to cave in. What... was that... power..?

 

\---

 

"OI JAEGER WAKE UP!" A painful tingle at my ear snapped me into consciousness. My eyes rushed open at the realisation of the foreign place where we were. I leant back up against the wall and was about to rub my eyes when I realised that heavy shackles were holding them down. The sudden bump and sound of gravel underneath us informed me that we were now travelling in the back of a truck.

"What the hell happened back there!" A familiar voice asked. Sitting adjacent to me was a very bruised and very broken Jean. It must have been him that woke me.

"Jean? You're okay!" The light shone as thin stripes of light through the door of the truck. I looked around to see Connie, Sasha and Hanji were asleep, also tied down. I lowered my voice.

"How long have we been in this truck?" I asked

"We're halfway through day two." He whispered. My eyes widened.

"Yes, you've been unconscious for more than a day. Now spill what on Earth happened back there. Your eyes were bright glowing red. You had these weird glowing horn things as well. What... happened!" The memories of the red ram and the pixel ribbons emitting around came flooding back. I shook my head.

"I have no idea. I just... started feeling drowsy yet alert and then... Wait!" I looked towards my left bicep and noticed the marking was still there. More like a tattoo than branding like I thought it was, it was black and red and in the shape for the symbol of Aries.

"Okay..." Was all Jean said. No spiky comeback. No smart ass remark. It was only then that I realised how pale he had become, the grey bags under his eyes and the deathly look to his features, lit by the stripes of light. He survived losing his titan-bound partner. He didn't become a monster but he still lost half of his soul.

"I'm- I'm so sorry- I couldn't..."

"It's not your fault Eren... You did what you could..." I couldn't help but feel guilty for all of this. If I had been there just a few seconds earlier- The truck halted abruptly. We all jerked forward and then back again, Sasha and Connie bumping their heads together in the process to awaken. I attuned my ears to the outside noises expecting to hear the eerie wind of an abandoned graveyard. What I heard was no grave yet it was strangely familiar. Not the natural noises of birds or rustling of leaves in a wind. It had many different tones. Eventually I began to understand the distinct tones. Then it came to me. That noise was people. There was a crowd of people surrounding this truck. The click of the lock on the truck sent the door swinging open into a blinding light that we all hid our eyes from.

When our eyes finally adjusted, two men that I recognised to be Petra's henchmen, Gunther and Erd, and a few others walked in and unlocked the shackles from the truck but not from our hands. Erds voice purred into my ear.

"Don't you dare think about doing any of your Fancy host stuff, you will regret it." I stayed silent, knowing questioning him about the 'host stuff' was probably not wise. He kneed me in the spine and pushed me to stumble into a walk. We leapt from the truck leaving it to creak loudly and was led around the back. Five pillars were positioned neatly in a row, the crowds of people I heard before standing around them from a distance. Anxiety flowed once again. But it wasn't the crowd of people that made me uneasy, it was the familiarity of the setting. When I heard my name being called from the crowd from a voice I haven't heard in so long, my heart dropped. Hannah, Franz and Bertolt stood in the crowd with shock radiating from them. This wasn't just any place. It was Trost Plaza. The place where I first left with Armin. We were back home.

 

\---

 

_Unknown Older Male: "Hey! Get up! C'mon please get up!"_

**Unknown Young Male: "Huh? Oh it's you... Wait- It's you! How are you alive!"**

_Unknown Older Male: "Same way you are."_

**Unknown Young Male: "What about the others? Are they ali-"**

_Unknown Older Male: "No... I'm sorry... But it's because of them that we are here now. And the ones who are alive are in trouble. Including Eren. We need to leave. Now!"_

**Unknown Young Male: "But how are we going to get out?"**

_Unknown Older Male: "I don't know. I'd usually fly but... My wings... They're gone..."_   


End file.
